


Crosshairs

by bioticbooty



Series: Crosshairs 'Verse [2]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Action/Adventure, Awkward Flirting, F/M, Light Angst, Multi, Multiple Pairings, Romance, Slow Burn, Snipers, infiltrator shepards, multiple POVs, survivor's guilt, updates weekly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-18
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-02-05 05:19:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 114,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1806712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bioticbooty/pseuds/bioticbooty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With an unknown threat looming on the horizon, the crew of the Normandy band together on a mission that tests the limits of their endurability. Yet even in the midst of a mission gone awry, sometimes people find what they weren't even looking for. Slow-burn shenko romance, exploring all avenues of friendship and as they learn to open up to each other.</p><p>I LOVE Mass Effect - as anyone can readily attest to, but there was so much more that could have been explored about the story and wasn't! What does it mean to be a war hero? What does it mean to carry the burden of humanity's first Spectre? How DO you organize a galactic army against the reapers? What about the almost Shepards? </p><p>The games are great - but there's a lot of narrative just waiting to be explored. Crosshairs is more a re-imagining of Mass Effect than it is a retelling. Lots of new concepts, lots of math, more military slang.</p><p>I hope you enjoy the ride :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to my beta readers Kassandra Black and TheRev28, and also to coffeeandbiotics for being an amazing bouncing board for my ideas and keeping me on track. Also to Raven Studios for encouraging me to do what I needed to do and start over if that's what it takes, and for letting me throw ideas her way.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Mass Effect or it's characters, I just like to play in BioWare's sandbox.

**Part One**

"Delivery, sir."

Kaidan Alenko accepted the encrypted datapad while the Corporal hovered at the precipice between the hall and his apartment.

Alliance High Command. A datapad he'd expected ever since given the orders of his impending reassignment to a new post the day before. The Tacoma had swung by Arcturus to deposit his ass aboard the station before heading out to the edges of the Attican Traverse on standard patrol.

Fortune favored him, as his best friend Jake just so happened to be aboard, his ship on a pit-stop before heading out into deep space. His surprise visit had been a welcome distraction against the growing anticipation of a new post - especially since the transfer came without advance notice. He hadn't even put in a request despite more than a few ample opportunities.

Alenko dismissed the Corporal. The kid snapped off a quick salute, turned smartly on his heel, and left.

"This what brought you to Arcturus?" Jake asked.

Alenko swiped the button to shut the door to his apartment, eyes fixed on the datapad and the field currently awaiting his security clearance. That was… odd. The screen flashed, confirming his ID, accepting his code.

He flopped onto the sofa and accepted a beer from Jake. "Let's find out. Report to the SSV Normandy for duty at 0800 hours, docking bay D14. Assigned posting: head of marine detail…" He arched an eyebrow as he continued to scan the contents.

Head of marine detail. That was new. Certainly worth his pay grade and rank, and not a stretch of his abilities. Rather, it was the prejudice of an L2, despite the fact that the Alliance accepted biotics, that he'd suspected kept him off bigger leads such as that.

Of course, the moment the ships name was out of his mouth, Jake had lit up, boots slamming into the deck. "Shit, Kaidan! That's the new prototype turian-Alliance ship I was telling you about a few weeks ago!"

"I'll be damned," Alenko muttered.

He remembered Jake going on about the latest and greatest of the Alliance fleet. For a solid week, his messages had contained nothing  _but_  whatever information Jake could get his hands on, and it was clear if not from his words at the very least from his tone, that he'd put in for a transfer request.

Joint turian-alliance endeavor as a proverbial olive branch and sign of moving past old grudges, disguised as a high-tech ship. The Alliance displaying uncharacteristic humility by redesigning the prototype frigate with turian schematics, acting as an unvoiced acknowledgment of the prowess of the turian fleet. At the same time, turians tipped their heads by acknowledging that human renovations were worth not only their time but also their consideration.

New prototype warbirds had a way of rocketing a marine's career path forward. And if one had been stuck in rank at Second Lieutenant, the idea of rocketing forward became all the more appealing.

"You lucky sonofabitch," Jake blew air out between his lips, shaking his head.

He rolled his eyes when I glanced up at him. "You could apply for a transfer."

"I  _did_ ," he slumped into the back of the sofa, balancing the beer on his knee as he contemplated its contents. "Request denied. When did you submit yours? Maybe I was just slow on the uptake."

"I didn't." Alenko scanned the contents of the pad, looking for who'd put in the recommendation or a list of circumstances that lead to his selection for the detail. "Looks like… Captain Anderson requested me."

"By name?"

He arched an eyebrow as he continued reading the paragraph glorifying his service record. "Yeah."

Jake simply sighed dramatically and took a swig from his bottle. "It's your golden record. Not to mention your brains. Probably only want smart people for this mission, what with it being a new high-tech ship and all. Who's the XO?"

Alenko skipped over reading the specs about the drive core, flagging the section for later perusal, and skimmed until he saw the crew manifest. Unsurprised by Captain Anderson listed as the Normandy's CO, considering he'd recommended Alenko in the first place and CO's tended to have first picks where applicable. The name for XO, however, caught his attention. "Lieutenant Commander Olivia J. Shepard."

Jake didn't even look over at him. "Stop fucking with me Kaidan, everyone knows Shepard's posted on the Singapore. Special ops. A journalist cornered her for a spot two weeks ago and there was no mention of a transfer."

Instead of replying, he shoved the datapad in Jake's face and Jake's jaw dropped in astonishment, quickly followed by something not unlike awe, though Jake would deny that with his dying breath. He even forgot to finish taking a sip from his beer, the bottle perched at the edges of his lips.

Once the reality of the words on the pad hit him, he switched his gaze to Alenko and said, "You realize you'll be working with a legend, right? A real damn legend."

Alenko leaned forward as Jake started describing the 'Hero of the Blitz' in great detail, and scanned the rest of the contents of the pad. Only fifteen hours till he had to report for duty. Mostly preliminary meetings, familiarizing himself with the ship and the crew. Undoubtedly one-on-one meetings with Shepard as they discussed marine detail. While the duties of XO's were broader in scope than that of the head of marine detail, she'd also be leading the ground team operations. Her opinion was not without weight, and that was ignoring the fact that she'd made a career out of being indestructible.

Aside from that, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't the least bit intrigued by the specs of a prototype deep scout frigate the likes of which the Alliance hadn't seen before. Techs in R&D would probably shit themselves to get their hands on the pad Alenko had in his hands.  _Especially_  over the IES stealth technology combined with the Tantalus drive core.

The mission details were flagged as classified, only to be discussed once aboard ship. That was interesting.

"... veins with ice. One glance is enough to freeze you in your boots. She doesn't talk much, but man, she doesn't  _need_  to." Jake gestured emphatically at his eyes.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Commander Shepard," Jake shook his head as if Alenko were the idiot not keeping up. "You realize she held off an entire company of batarians and slavers on Elysium for twenty-six hours? Woman's made of cold, hard steel. If you weren't so picture perfect in your duties, I'd tell you to watch your ass with that one. Career breakers, N's. And she's an  _N7_. Get your ass handed to you if you so much as breathe wrong."

"I highly doubt that." Alenko tossed the pad onto the table and checked the time. "You hungry? Thinking of heading out to Changs, get some curry."

"Sure. Do you think she's already aboard the station?"

"Are you looking for a date?"

Jake punched him in the arm as he grabbed his jacket. They might be aboard a space station, but the civilian sector with the restaurants tended towards the cool side. As he locked the door to the apartment, Jake said, "I want something warm in my bed."

That line of thinking wasn't something a head of marine detail should entertain concerning his XO, and Alenko shut it down immediately, which given the circumstances wasn't hard. "Have you checked out the latest Logic Arrest model?"

"You won't convert me to the darkside, Kaidan. Might as well throw in the towel."

"I've been thinking of getting one. CPU comes overclocked and it has better integration with standard Alliance armor shielding algorithms." He nudged Jake in the ribs as they turned down a corner that dumped them onto the main gangway in the civilian district of Arcturus. "Besides, I got you to say 'dark side' in a serious capacity. There's hope for you yet."

"Piss off." Jakes accompanying smile took the sting out of the words.

By the time they reached Changs, it was overflowing with the dinner crowd, so Alenko directed Jake towards the take-out counter he was too familiar with, having spent more time there than any other place in the restaurant combined. He'd even reached first name basis with the waitress on the other side, Hilda, an older lady who'd been crushing the counter for as long as he could remember. She greeted them with a warm smile, scooting down the line, and Alenko declined the proffered menu and rattled off his order. Like Hilda knew he would, yet she always offered the menu anyway because that was just who she was.

"Need to keep up those calories, or that handsome face will turn to bones! Girls don't like their men bony."

Jaked pushed up next to Alenko and said, "Girls don't like Kaidan."

Hilda sniffed. "Girls don't like their men pretty, either. You? Too pretty. Get a scar, then we'll talk."

The last sentence was punctuated with a wink and Jake stammered his way through his much smaller order before Hilda floated away, tossing in one last suggestive glance before swinging to the next customer.

After a few minutes, Jake turned to him and whispered, "She uh…"

Alenko coughed discreetly, interrupting Jake, as Hilda returned with their food and slid the containers onto the counter. "Extra cookie for you, pretty boy."

They found a bench outside the restaurant in the quad with a great view of incoming ships. Another marine occupied the bench, but as the others were full and career military were used to tight quarters, Alenko moved towards it without second thought.

Jake, on the other hand, with a newfound shyness undoubtedly introduced from his encounter with Hilda, hesitated, balancing a hot spring roll in his fingertips. "Mind if we sit?"

His question took the marine by surprise as she stared up at Jake, 'tool half raised and fingers poised over whatever she was working. Then she shrugged, "The bench is open."

Jake grinned, having regained some of his composure, as they sat down. The marine - officer, judging by the pips on her collar, though he hadn't gotten a close look - had already turned back to her 'tool, tucking her boots beneath her as if to occupy less space.

He was just about to bite into his own spring roll when he felt an elbow in his ribs and Jake spoke quietly, "Bet you can't guess what model she's using."

Alenko sighed then leaned forward just enough to peer around Jake and get a good look at the 'tool. Alliance standard orange, nothing new. Most marines went with the base color, even engineers and they were the most likely to break free. He couldn't see her wrist as she was sitting left of them, therefore the actual mechanical part of the 'tool wasn't visible, but Alenko didn't  _need_  to see it to know what gear she was sporting. "Savant."

"You just pulled that out of your ass." Despite his declaration, Jake glanced at the 'tool.

"You wouldn't know the difference between a Savant and the Bluewire you still use if they were shoved in your face."

"Doesn't mean you didn't make it up."

"It's a tech-based omni-tool, designed specifically around remote hacking. Also designed with quick application of tech attacks, specifically engineered with sabotage in mind. The fab unit is off the charts, fastest production rate currently on market if you get the X. You can tell by the style of the outer modal dial. Consumes a lot of power, but if you know how to use it, it's worth it."

Jake stared at him. "No wonder you got reassigned. Must be serving with a crew of geeks."

"Mmm," he grunted around a mouthful of curry, "Geeks united."

They sat in silence for a bit as they finished eating their food. The curry was to  _die_  for and the spring rolls were even better, delivering mouth-watering aromas only Changs was truly capable of inducing. He stuffed the last one in his mouth long before Jake finished making his way through his teriyaki, so Alenko opened up his 'tool to peruse his messages.

He missed Jake twisting to look at the marine once he'd finished eating, but didn't miss him ask, "Is that a Savant?"

Alenko looked at Jake and then the woman, their eyes connecting for a split second. Long enough for him to shrug apologetically.

"Yes."

"Damn," Jake sighed, "Thanks."

She hadn't waited for Jake's response to fling herself back and he didn't blame her. If it'd been him with his face shoved into his 'tool like that, he wouldn't have wanted to be disturbed either.

"Guess you win that one, mate."

Kaidan grunted. "Geeks united."

According to a message from Captain Anderson, the launch ceremony for the Normandy's first flight was tomorrow, eighteen hundred hours. Dress blues required.

He received another message while reading the details of the ceremony. From the XO. Requesting a meeting with the ground team once everyone was aboard and situated, to go over tactics and strategy. Perhaps they'd finally be given details for the mission. An extra note at the bottom directed to him concerning HoMD*, with a separate note saying she wasn't trying to step on his toes. She just liked detail and familiarizing herself with the headspace of her officers.

"What time is it?"

Alenko exited the messaging system and shoved his omni-tool in Jake's face for a reply. When Jake shoved his arm away, he booted up a console and checked on the progress of some numbers he'd been running earlier that day and grinned. They'd completed, which meant he could finally make some headway on a project he'd shoved to the backburner a few months ago.

"I've got to run, soon. Agincourt leaves for patrol at nineteen hundred hours."

Alenko nodded. Time for hanging out was few and far between, especially between career military friends. Grab downtime where you could and hope your buddies stuck around long enough for a meal.

"Not in port long this time," he replied.

"Personnel transfer, refueling, and resupplying. Got a new armory specialist coming aboard, bringing in a new line of guns. CO didn't want to lollygag, only gave us a couple hours station-side." Jake glanced at him. "Don't tell me you're gonna shut yourself in your apartment with your omni-tool after I leave."

Alenko shifted on the bench. "I'll leave the door open."

"It's your last night before heading out on a new posting. You should enjoy yourself, not be a shut in."

"Going out is overrated."

"Hit the courts, then."

"Unless the wall offers up some conversation, I think I'd rather not."

He stabbed his thumb behind him while looking at Alenko with a mock serious expression. "Do like our friend here and at least geek out outside."

Alenko's eyes slid to the marine completely absorbed in her 'tool, fingers whizzing through the display. When Jake tapped him on the shoulder, he sighed and nodded.

Jake broke out in a grin, clearly believing he'd won and that maybe the girl had something to do with it. Rather, Alenko knew Jake wouldn't back down even if it made him late and got his ass landed in hot water. Even off duty, the officer in him couldn't quite stand for that flagrant disregard for timeliness.

Agreeing got Jake off the bench and stretching. "So long, mate. Might be a while before we make our way back."

Alenko shut off his 'tool and looked up at Jake. He offered his hand, and Jake accepted it. "Take care of yourself

Jake mock saluted as he started to step away then glanced over at the marine, his eyes glinting mischievously. Alenko barely resisted the urge to groan. "See you 'round, soldier. Make sure my friend stays on the bench for at least five minutes, yeah?"

She looked up at Jake, much differently than she had the previous times. Eyes critical as she glanced him over with the proficiency of a drill sergeant in their element and for a second, Alenko almost felt as if he  _were_  witnessing a drill sergeant preparing to dress down a marine. He nearly straightened in his seat.

"It's Commander, Second Lieutenant. And your friend looks like a big boy. I think he can take care of himself."

Jake paled under the scrutiny and started walking backwards away from them half-moving towards a real salute before catching himself. "Aye, ma'am."

Alenko waved at him to move his ass before re-opening his omni-tool, remembering the message he'd gotten from his XO and figuring he should probably respond in the affirmative. Not that he'd say no to his XO. It was only a 'request' out of respect. Still, he liked being prompt and regardless of whether or not his XO was a war hero with 'veins of ice' as Jake so candidly spout off. Though Alenko rather doubted that's what he believed; rather he wouldn't put it past Jake to get her autograph, provided he could actually recognize her on site. Hell, Alenko had only ever seen the promo shot of her from the Blitz and that was years ago.

If that's what Jake was expecting to see, he was in for disappointment.

Enough ruminating about his XO. He rolled his shoulders, glanced over his response for typos or anything idiotic that might have slipped past his foot-to-mouth barrier, and sent it off.

Then he deactivated his 'tool and glanced around the quad, wondering if he wouldn't actually like to stick around after all. Perhaps get a coffee from his favorite shop just around the corner. Maybe find himself in an omni-tool store and drool over the Logic Arrest, debating whether or not it was worth the credits. His 'tool was getting a little old…

"Huh, prompt." When the Commander realized she'd inadvertently captured his attention, she shrugged apologetically and said, "You don't have to stick around. I won't tell."

"Thanks," he said, "I might hold you to that."

She ducked her head and he reopened his 'tool, still undecided as to what exactly he wanted to do. So in lieu of action, he switched to dev mode and started working on his program, crunching numbers and formulating code. Code which would see  _many_  revisions in the future, but which only needed to be functional now. It was more an experiment in methodology, flexing his technical muscles.

A part of him thought what he  _should_  be doing was reading up on the data back on the pad in his apartment, but he still had plenty of time to do that. After twenty minutes of dicking around with his program and getting something that could potentially stand a chance of compiling, the responsible side of him won out and he shut down his omni-tool and stood up.

Feeling like he should say something before leaving as they'd built up a semblance of rapport - and, if he admitted it to himself, she was rather pretty in a tough sort of way, not to mention the tech thing really caught his attention - against Jake's ever-glowing outgoing nature, he said, "Take care."

She looked up at him in surprise, recovering so fast he could have imagined it and he wasn't so sure he hadn't as she gave him a small lopsided half-small and said, "Not saying your friend is right, but being outside really isn't that bad."

He shrugged. "No guarantees, but I'll try to stave off the desire to sequester myself like a hermit for at least an hour."

"If you ship out tomorrow, should make it two."

"That why you're out here?" Alenko asked.

He considered sitting back down as he hadn't been aware how small of stature she was, but with him towering over her as he stood next to the bench, it was painfully obvious.

Fortunately, if she noticed the height discrepancy, she didn't seem bothered by it in the least. "Ship leaves dock day after tomorrow, but I gotta report for duty bright and early. You?"

"Something similar, I think. Haven't read all the details yet."

She waved her free hand dismissively. "Details are for XO's and CO's to worry over. Everyone else should catch a break on leave."

He chuckled. "Well, I like to be prepared."

"You'll make your XO happy, then. Go be a hermit for the both of us."

He grinned again and she mirrored it back. "Aye aye, ma'am. Good hunting."

"Right back at ya'."

He glanced at his 'tool as he left, checking the time. He just might be able to make it to the docks in time to see the Tacoma launch and mentally salute his old ship. And his favorite coffee shop just so happened to be along the way.

-O-

*HoMD: Head of Marine Detail, military shorthand


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is one of the rare chapters with a time overlap between perspective characters. It felt appropriate to introduce Shepard and Alenko in this manner this one time, but the rest of the story will not be told in this format.

Lieutenant Commander Olivia Shepard shut the door to her old office for the final time. Well, no longer her office. The Singapore’s new XO would report for duty in less than an hour, with the ship stopping just long enough to deposit her aboard Arcturus and pick up its new XO. If the orders hadn’t come in for her immediate transfer, the Singapore would have been deep in the traverse by now.

She’d miss this old bucket.

However, she was excited for the new posting. Going back to a frigate, and a specialty prototype frigate at that. She’d nearly dropped the pad after reading the specs of the Normandy. If she could have, she’d have reported for duty as soon as the Singapore docked at the station.

Unfortunately, the ship was still closed off. Last minute engineering touch ups, making sure everything ran fine, and that the drive core wouldn’t explode as soon as the engines were turned on.

She swung her duffel onto her shoulder and marched up the hall towards the CO’s quarters.

Which only served to remind her that she wouldn’t have a cabin on the frigate. Back to sleeper pods and rotating shifts.

The door opened immediately after she rang the bell and she stepped inside Captain Greene’s office.

“You still aboard my boat, Shepard?”

She grinned and dropped her bag to the floor. “Only for five more minutes, sir.”

He stood up from his desk and rounded it to stand in front of her, towering over her and reminding her of a grizzly bear. “Get all your tech shit out of my new XO’s office?”

“I might have left a surprise or two, sir.”

“Cut the sir, crap, you’re no longer my crew.” He stuck out his hand and she accepted it with a firm grip. “Good luck on your new posting, Shepard. Do XO shit on that frigate for a few months, you’ll have your own command in no time.”

“Thank you,” she replied, cutting off the ‘sir’ just in time. Old habits die hard, and military habits die last. And something about Captain Greene’s persona demanded a ‘sir’.

Twenty minutes after the Singapore shipped out, Shepard tossed her duffel onto the bed in her apartment. Then she mosied through her living room, ensuring that Henry* hadn’t collected an undue amount of dust before activated her terminal to check her messages. Only one - from Kassy, all but ordering that she go outside and explore the decks of Arcturus instead of hiding out in her apartment.

Figured that her best friend would find the time to send her a threatening message regarding her typically anti-social hermitting whenever she found herself aboard station with more than a few hours spare time.

Her terminal beeped. Another message from Kassy:  _I’ll know if you don’t leave your apartment._

Shepard grunted and fired off a reply:  _Slavedriver._

While she didn’t believe Kassy would  _actually_  know short of her own guilty conscience when asked, Shepard only stuck around long enough to shower and change into a clean uniform. Out of uniform she’d probably get some peace and quiet from any media that happened to be on the station, but that would require going through her storage locker at the foot of her bed and she didn’t feel like it. Nearly seven years since the Blitz and they were still hounding her tail and showing the same photo of her  _everywhere_.

If she could, she’d burn it. With great pleasure. Perhaps destroy the camera that had taken it, too, for good measure.

She spent some time perusing the local tech shops, drooling over the latest in omni-tool architecture design. The Logic Arrest looked intriguing, certainly the latest model more than any other, but she still preferred her savant. The fab unit on it was essential to her operations. Besides, the Arrest wasn’t as capable when it came to the remote hacking department. The range wasn’t as good. That was practically vital.

Still, it  _was_  an appealing model and a part of her wanted to buy it just to mess around with it. See if she could push it past its limits, and how far.

Savant hadn’t come out with a new model since her last purchase, though she’d read some intriguing articles about future Savant omni-tools. There  _were_ , however, some new mods and memory upgrades and she toyed around with looking at the specs and waffling over whether or not to buy them. It wasn’t that she had any problems with her current ‘tool, she was just fascinated with new hardware.

In the end, her desire to  _not_  break open her omni-tool before heading to a new posting won out. Maybe in a few weeks...

She left the shop without buying anything and headed towards one of her favorite places to eat as her stomach growled, reminding her that she hadn’t eaten anything since midday.  _Real_  food and not  _ship_  food would be a real treat. And it kept her out of the apartment a little bit longer and away from a guilty conscience.

Unfortunately it was  _busy_  and she didn’t much feel like waiting in a line that ran out the door or dealing with a crowd. Even the take out counter was swamped, with  _that_  line wrapping around the corner. So even though she was hungry, she decided to wait for the place to clear up a bit and headed towards the nearest bench with a good view of the lines. She didn’t much like crowds.

In the mean time, she busted out her omni-tool. Kassy couldn’t complain about her being a geek in public because it wasn’t  _technically_  against the rules. She just wasn’t supposed to stay shut in her apartment the whole night.

Though that was probably gonna happen as soon as she got food in her stomach, if she was honest with herself.

Shepard was so engrossed in rewriting the code of an old program that could use some updating to accommodate current algorithms, that she almost failed to realize someone was speaking to her, hovering near the bench and balancing food in his hands. She scraped her mind for the words, but came up blank. Though judging from the busyness of the quad and the significant lack of open benches around the vicinity coupled with the food in his hands - not to mention the fact that his friend had already sat down on the other side - he was probably checking if it was alright if they used the bench.

She shrugged. “The bench is open.”

The kid plopped down next to his friend. With one last glance at him, she tucked her feet beneath her and returned to her program. Picking up where she left off, this time her mind blanking as to what she’d been about to do. So she moved to a different problem.

… and became aware that the friend was peering at her around the kid, and said, “Savant.”

Against her better judgement, she eavesdropped, because  _anyone_  able to recognize an omni-tool on sight, without seeing the actual hardware component, was a geek of her caliber. Evidence she could later use against Kassy if necessary.

Even more impressive was when he listed of the specs and got them right. Not a lot of people appreciated the power consumption of the Savant, believing it to be extravagant especially for field application. She maintained that they simply weren’t using the ‘tool properly. It was power heavy because it was power _ful_. One just had to know how to manage the flow.

“No wonder you got reassigned,” the kid said, “Must be a crew of geeks.”

“Geeks united.”

She almost snickered, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to be drawn into a conversation or be terribly social.

Her stomach growled a bit louder as they ate their food and she realized that they’d risked the swarm of people to get food from Changs - or had been lucky enough to catch the counter at the right moment. A quick glance showed it was  _still_  busy but the crowd was thinning. Perhaps in twenty minutes or so, she’d be able to find a table where she could hole up.

In the meantime, nothing for it but to keep dicking around on her ‘tool. Though the spring rolls being devoured next to her made it hard to concentrate on programming, so she switched to reviewing the information Anderson had sent her earlier that day regarding her ground team: Kaidan M. Alenko, a career military marine with sentinel training who’d also be serving as HoMD, and an enlisted with potential, Richard L. Jenkins. They’d also be working with a Council Spectre, which she found odd as the mission parameters didn’t indicate that level of involvement was strictly necessary.

A finger tapping her shoulder pulled her out of her thoughts and she turned to look at the kid as he pulled his hand away and asked, “Is that a Savant?”

She stared at him for half a second then looked at his friend who looked back at her with part sympathy and part dry amusement and shrugged apologetically. She considered telling the kid to trust his friend as he seemed to know his shit when it came to tech, but settled on a simple, “Yes.”

“Damn, thanks.”

She flung herself back and continued reading up on her team. Pressly’s name on the list as Navigator was a pleasant surprise. Last time she’d seen him was at the ceremony after the Blitz, when the admiralty had awarded her the Star of Terra. She’d had to sit on the stage for the whole ceremony instead of taking a seat in the crowd as she’d cracked three of her ribs and no one wanted to risk her falling on her ass in front of the media.

Maybe if she had, the press would leave her alone.

She fired off a quick email to the ground team, requesting a meeting. She liked knowing the people that worked under her, to know their quirks and what made them tick. She added a note to Alenko that she didn’t want to step on his toes as HoMD. One of her previous XO’s had stuck his nose in her job every time he turned around and she knew how frustrating that could be, though she didn’t put  _that_  into her email. She just wanted to get a glimpse into his headspace if that wasn’t too much trouble.

There was a saying amongst Officers: an XO was never truly off the clock, even when their posting hadn’t even started. Picking up the slack from the CO and seeing to all the management details. Not that Anderson was a lazy CO or the type of marine to foist his duties off onto his XO. There was just a lot to do that didn’t fall under his purview, settling into her domain instead.

Like reaching out to the junior officers and getting a feel for their headspace.

From the looks of things, any infiltration ops would see Alenko acting as her spotter as the more experienced of her two choices. Infiltration tended towards two man teams, anyway. Though she’d take Jenkins out, too. Get his hands dirty and refine his skills where they needed it.

A note in her file from Anderson indicated that part of her job was to assess Alenko’s candidacy as XO. Even if that note hadn’t been there, Alenko’s portfolio was promising enough that she’d probably have done it anyway. A quick scan of his accomplishments revealed multiple commendations per year, some with the added ‘despite his setbacks’. The corner of her mouth twitched and her lips thinned as she read the meaning between the lines: despite his status as L2.

Well, he wouldn’t see that sort of discrimination from her. One of the best operatives she’d worked with had been an L2, though he’d specialized at infiltration.

“See you ‘round, soldier.” Shepard snapped out of her ground team assessment and looked at the kid, standing between her and his friend, still seated on the bench. “Make sure my friend stays on the bench for at least five minutes, yeah?”

The friend shook his head in disbelief, as if watching a trainwreck and unable to stop it. She took in the pip on the kids uniform and looked him over clinically. Having been addressed as soldier when her rank was clearly visible on her collar, not to mention being empathetic to the ‘stay outside!’ cause, put her back up and so she replied, perhaps more tersely than necessary, “It’s Commander, Second Lieutenant. And your friend looks like a big boy. I think he can take care of himself.”

The kids face paled at the change in her voice and he started backing away, hand twitching towards a salute before he could stop himself. “Aye, ma’am.”

After he left, she glanced back at Changs, re-contemplating the thinning crowd. No visible empty tables and she didn’t relish trying to claim (or reclaim) a bench for eating. Besides, could only get fresh brewed tea if she ate inside the restaurant and she kind of wanted that now as she found herself mildly agitated.

Her eyes settled on the kid’s friend, still sitting on the bench, using what appeared to be an older model of the Logic Arrest, but not too much older. Two generations ago, at most. She wondered if he knew about the latest model. Well, considering he’d spoken eloquently to the attributes of the Savant, he probably did.

Small chat with a stranger was probably exactly what Kassy would consider a night well spent. But she also didn’t want to interrupt someone so clearly engrossed in their ‘tool doing who the hell knew what, especially when that someone appeared to be under strict friend orders to visit the outside world. She could empathize with that.

So after staring wistfully at Changs for a little longer, and with only a little bit of envy that the marine next to her had already devoured an entire box of spring rolls (and had rudely left the empty box between them), she activated her ‘tool again to kill some more time. Dicking around with code was more exciting than staring at plaza full of people. She was surprised to see a response sitting in her inbox from her HoMD and muttered, “Huh, prompt,” before she could catch herself.

Consequently, she became aware she’d captured the marine’s attention, so she shrugged apologetically and said, in part because she only too familiar with being disturbed by the thought processes of others, “You don’t have to stick around. I won’t tell.”

He smiled at her gratefully. “Thanks, I might hold you to that.”

She returned to her ‘tool and sifted through her list of projects, not really interested in working on any of them. She shut it down after a few minutes of restless perusing, occasionally adding a new line here and there, and looked around again. Then back at the marine who nose deep in his own ‘tool, apparently not suffering from restlessness as she was. Probably because he’d eaten. She quickly looked away again, lest he think she was staring.

Another assessment of the crowd didn’t result in her favor so she reopened her ‘tool  _again_. Writing Kassy a message might be a good idea, let her know that Shepard’s current situation was entirely her fault. That if she’d stayed in instead of going out, she probably wouldn’t be squirming on a bench. She scrapped that idea after deciding that Kassy would probably guilt trip her into disturbing the marine, and that wasn’t in anybody’s interests. Not hers because despite being adept at public speaking and capable of issuing orders at the top of her lungs, regular social interaction wasn’t exactly her thing.

In the end, she settled on sending a message to Kassy, but left it at cursing her for her orders. She was just finishing up a particularly colorful line when the marine said, “Take care.”

Hoping she masked the surprise that he’d spoken to her, as all of their interactions had largely been through his friend or initiated by her, she replied, “Not saying your friend is right, but being outside really isn’t that bad.”

Except it totally was. Well, not  _really_  but suddenly she didn’t particularly relish the idea of sitting there alone, even if they hadn’t been talking. The company was nice.

He shrugged. “No guarantees, but I’ll try to stave off the desire to sequester myself like a hermit for at least an hour.”

She suppressed a smile. “If you ship out tomorrow, should make it two.”

“That why you’re out here?” He shifted his stance as he spoke, eyes flickering between the bench and her as if considering sitting down while they talked. It would be nice to not have to crane her head as much… sitting down, she hadn’t realized that he was so  _tall_.

“Ship leaves dock day after tomorrow, but I gotta report for duty bright and early. You?”

“Something similar, I think.” He rubbed his neck and gave her a sheepish look. “Haven’t read all the details yet.”

Before he’d even finished speaking, she was already waving his words away. “Details are for XO’s and CO’s to worry over.”

At least, that was  _her_  position. She certainly liked her junior officers being up on things, but it wasn’t a requirement of hers before a mission had even started. Most senior officers she’d met were of the same mind. As long as everyone reported on time, let them sort their own shit out.

It  _did_  make her wonder whether or not her junior officers were briefing themselves on their posting. Or if the message to her HoMD had set a fire under his ass. She hoped not. It certainly wasn’t her intention if it had.

“Well, I like to be prepared,” he chuckled. She found herself wanting to smile up at him.

“You’ll make your XO happy, then.” And because he hadn’t sat down, she added, “Go be a hermit for the both of us.”

He grinned again and this time, she returned it in kind. “Aye aye, ma’am. Good hunting.”

“Right back at ya’.”

She watched him leave, wondering if Kassy would crucify her for at least not getting his name.  _Another friend wouldn’t kill you, ‘Liv!_  She shook her head in amusement, dispelling the notion altogether. There was a chance, small as it was, that she’d run into him again. Then at that point she could introduce herself. Maybe.

She really was hermit-inclined.

 

And finally, it looked like there was a free table in Changs.

-O-

* Henry is the name of Olivia's first Sniper Rifle, decommissioned after it was damaged beyond repair during the Blitz.


	3. Chapter 3

"You know," Shepard leaned back in her chair across from Anderson, "I'm surprised Joker wasn't aboard as soon as the techs cleared the ship."

From what she'd heard, and certainly from what she'd gathered reading his file, he was a top of the line pilot who liked to get his hands dirty. Add to that a new type of drive core heretofore unseen on any vessel, and her surprise was self-evident. Most pilots she'd met would have killed to get their hands all over the nav panels and start running simulations while cursing the engineering department for not fine-tuning properly.

Pilots were a finicky bunch.

"Frankly so am I. Half expected him to beat me to the airlock," Anderson answered. He slid the pad he'd been typing on across the table to her and she picked it up. "Mission details."

She arched an eyebrow as she read the sparse contents. "Mission pick-up, sir?"

Anderson, of course, understood the underlying question but waited for her to continue. She did. "Mission pick-up with a Council Spectre?"

"I know what you're thinking-"

"-what the hell kind of cargo requires a Spectre?" she provided. "What the hell kind of SNAFU did our Spectre get himself into to be relegated to cargo babysitting?"

Anderson continued as if she hadn't interrupted, though the bemused twinkle in his eye gave him away. "Sensitive cargo. Too early to discuss details, brass is worried about an information leak. The Council has a vested interest."

She waited for him to clarify, but it seemed that the 'worry over the information leak' extended to her as well. That made her shift uncomfortably in her chair, as the XO was usually in the classified mission detail loop - not standing on the other side with their ass hanging over a potential fire. She didn't begrudge Anderson holding fast to orders, despite their friendship outside duty. She just didn't like not having what she considered mission critical information.

It would make the debrief with her ground squad later more technical and less mission focused, but she could work with that. It had always been intended to be more of a get to know each other gig, just without the beers and tacos. Still, she suspected her HoMD would arch an eyebrow or something of that caliber, if he had a solid head on his shoulders. And if his file was any judge, he did.

She also suspected as much from his prompt response and generally, marines didn't make it to Staff Lieutenant and HoMD without a good head. But the prompt response could go one of two ways: solid head or butt kisser. She was betting on the former.

The idea of Anderson selecting a butt kisser with her as the XO was a joke up his alley, but not something he'd do for such an odd mission where details were classified up the wazoo.

The young Jenkins, however… enlisted were always hit or miss with the 'big names', though she loathed referring to herself as such. Some wouldn't 'see what the big deal was' and others would fall to their knees faster than salute.

Sometimes she really hated the Blitz. She absentmindedly brushed her fingers against her ribcage and frowned before setting the pad down and stretching.

Jenkins  _had_  promoted to Corporal pretty quickly though…

"Alenko just logged in," Anderson murmured, still reading whatever contents filled his pad. Shepard was starting to go cross-eyed from reading, eyes grainy, and sorely regretting having hermitted herself in her room and staying up half the night working on junk. To top it off, she hadn't even finished the project before forcing herself to go to bed.

"Time to bring out the cavalry?"

"No pranks, Shepard."

"Gotta know the man before I prank him, sir."

"You 'sir' me one more time before we're on the clock and I'll kick your butt out of this office." He didn't even look up as he delivered the threat, though the corner of his mouth quirked in a smile.

"If he comes down to greet you, I could trip him."

This time he didn't resist the smile as he said, "No, Shepard."

She carried on. "Deck him, then."

Anderson dropped his pad and scrutinized her. "You want out of here, don't you."

He purposefully hadn't phrased it as a question. She only grinned in response.

"How late did you stay up?"

"That's classified, sir."

"Get the hell out of here."

Shepard jumped up from her chair and knocked off a salute that bordered on mockery which only made Anderson's stern frown as he rose with her more frownier. They stepped out of his office together, through the doors Anderson always kept open.

"I'm gonna hit the head," she told him and he nodded as she split off away from the stairs where she could already hear someone huffing with the exertion of a bag balanced on their shoulders and attempting to not fall to their death in the narrow staircase.

She'd write that one down as a design flaw if anyone ever asked her opinion. Elevator should have gone all the way up and not just to the crew deck.

Once her business was complete and she'd scrubbed hands, patting them on her fatigues as someone had forgotten to stock the bathroom with a towel, she headed towards the mess. Anderson had probably already offered the welcoming cup of coffee, which would mean she'd have to pour her own.

She nearly tripped, and recovered faster than a salarian could blink, when she saw  _the other marine_  sitting across from Anderson on the bench.

His choking on his coffee as their eyes met was considerably less graceful, and would have been enough to make her smile if she hadn't also been as shocked as he apparently was.

Anderson, however, mistook the choking as misplaced admiration judging by the expression on his face, so before he said something potentially embarrassing, Shepard said, "Alenko and I met last night, though we never exchanged names."

"You were outside, Shepard?"

"Living witness, sitting right across from you." She pointed at Alenko as she turned to the coffee machine - and tripped over the duffle bag she'd missed as she'd rounded the corner. Too busy mentally tripping to take in her environment. "We'll see how long he's living, though," she added dryly after catching herself from falling on her ass.

Alenko was already at her side, hand on her elbow to steady her, apologetic. She waved him away before he so much as got a word in edgewise. "I'm the dumbass that didn't watch where she was going."

She hefted the bag off the floor and handed it to him with a smile she hoped would put him at ease. "Sorry, ma'am."

"Just don't make a habit of tripping me, and we can pretend this never happened."

She resisted the sudden urge to frown.

Instead, after dismissing his apology once more and pouring herself a cup of coffee, she asked, "Did you revert to a level of hermit heretofore unseen by the local population?"

That question seemed to take him aback momentarily as he reseated himself across from Anderson - and next to her. She felt the urge to hide the small sutures supplemented with a liquid bandage decorating the outside of her left wrist, and told herself it was because she'd read he was a medic and therefore probably as bad as Doctor Chakwas when it came to medical care and judgement of reckless behavior. She felt his eyes lingering on the sutures, though he was polite enough to not comment on them.

"Happy to report that I handed over my hermit ID and enjoyed the docks for a few hours before retiring to my quarters for the evening," he replied.

"I guess that makes me a hypocrite. I most certainly  _did_ revert to a state of hermit heretofore unseen by the local population. Perhaps we should conserve our resources and you could simply hand me your card."

Shepard pointedly ignored Anderson muttering 'that sounds more like you.'

Alenko stabbed his thumb over his shoulder where he'd stored the offending duffle. "It's in my bag."

"I should have known you'd get along with this one, Shepard," Anderson sighed, standing up. "Enjoy your break. I'm not gonna sit around if you two are gonna throw around technobabble."

"Geeks united, sir."

Anderson leaned onto the table and stared her down, though the amusement sparkling in his eyes betrayed his otherwise stern expression. "Admitting you have a problem is the first step in recovery, soldier."

"Geek isn't a condition,  _sir_. It's a state of being."

"So it's terminal, then."

"Aye, sir, it is," Alenko replied. She saw him nod sagely out of the corner of her eye, and the corner of her lips twitched up in a grin.

About time she worked with a proper geek again. Her last posting had been considerably lacking in that department, and the engineers had been uncomfortable with their XO hanging around their brainstorming table. Well, all of them except the Chief. But he'd been his own version of curmudgeon that hadn't exactly been conducive to geeking out.

Then again, she wasn't exactly the queen of approachability herself.

Unless you were a reporter. Then she was all kinds of approachable.

Anderson stared at the two of them, eyes shifting from one to the other before he shook his head and left, muttering under his breath something that sounded like 'geeks' and 'fuck me' before he was out of range and the words no longer carried.

After a moment of silence spent musing over the Captain's departure, she turned back to Alenko - and was mildly startled by the contemplative expression furrowing his brow which appeared to have been directed at her. Probably reconciling Shepard the 'war hero' with the rather mundane reality of Shepard the just-another-dumbass soldier. Since they weren't on duty and he'd stood with her regarding the geek thing, she let it slide. Maybe she was wrong.

"So you can really tell what kind of omni-tool someone is using just by looking at it?"

Shepard grabbed her cup and moved towards the coffee pot for another refill as he grinned sheepishly and said, "Not every model, no. Just got lucky last night that you were using one I can recognize."

"Not to mention describe with pinpoint accuracy."

He shrugged as she sat down across from him. "I could have made everything up and Jake would have accepted it as fact."

"So why are you using a model of the Logic Arrest that's two generations old?"

Alenko spluttered for the second time and she passed him a napkin. "Are you calling it junk?"

"Words in my mouth," she replied. "Logic Arrest is good up to three generations back."

"I like it."

Shepard stared at him flatly. "You like it."

"I  _like_  it. Why are you using a powerhouse?"

He held her eyes for a few moments before she finally replied with, "I like it."

"Ours is a varied hermit organization."

"Not to mention terse."

"I prefer succinct. It sounds nicer."

"Are we nice?"

He shrugged and eyed her earnestly, yet critically. "I'm nice."

Shepard shifted a fraction of an inch in her seat. She considered tossing off a retort about his friend being the one to ask to sit down next to her, while he'd just plopped his ass down and enjoyed himself - but said nothing. Instead she fiddled with the handle of her mug as the silence stretched for a bit, trying to decide if it was awkward - and what type of awkward it would be if it was.

The only answer that should have entered her mind was : new XO with new HoMD off duty.

Anything else should be shut down.

"So did you kick their ass?"

She jerked her attention back up to his face. "Excuse me?"

"The sutures, on your wrist." He moved as if to touch them but then thought better of it, his fingers falling a few inches short. "Fresh. Three days old, tops. Healing well."

"Looks nastier than it is. And yeah, I kicked her ass."

Her admission permeated some barrier in his mind, because this time he did touch her wrist with the clinical gentleness of a medic. He twisted it to get a better angle and then peered up at her through his lashes. "Not a military blade."

"You sure you're just a medic?"

"May have trained a little above the medic pay-grade, but I'm not a fully fledged field doc."

"So if I do something fucking crazy in the field, what you're saying is you're just gonna slap medi-gel on me and hope for the best?"

"I'll run with urgency to the med-evac, too."

"It was a piece of glass," she said as he delicately probed the still pink areas around the wound, careful to avoid tugging the sutures.

A really  _big_  and  _sharp_ piece of glass that had been meant for her face and which she'd deflected barely in time to prevent another nasty scar spanning the length of her cheek. At this rate, she was gonna retire from the Alliance with a face that was 85% medi-gel. Not that her present scars were terribly noticeable - only if one was as close as Alenko was now would they really stand out.

She almost asked if he could identify what had caused them when she saw his eyes scan the corner of her mouth and the right side of her face where a blast of shrapnel had caught her temple, peppering her skin. The little white scars almost blended in with her freckles, but not the crescent scar right below her eye.

The one at the corner of her mouth was not unlike the one on his lips, though his extended down below towards his chin. Almost as if someone had sucker punched him right in the face.

She frowned again as she met his eyes.

"Must have been a hell of a piece of glass to rip through the under armor."

She shrugged - and her wrist shifted in his grasp, which surprised her because she hadn't realized he was still holding it. "Bled like a bitch, but I slapped some medi-gel on it and continued the mission."

"Damn."

"Doc said I was fortunate it didn't get a tendon."

Alenko looked back at the wound. "A fraction of an inch down and you'd have been screwed."

"Maybe I should requisition custom armor with ceramic wrist plating on the underside. I am  _not_  giving up my sniper rifle."

" _Shepard,"_  her comm clicked in her ear and she held up her free hand to Alenko.

"Go ahead, sir."

" _Joker just arrived. Easier if you come to the cockpit."_

"On my way." She clicked her comm off and said to Alenko, "Meet and greet."

"Ground team?"

She shook her head. "Pilot. You're off the hook."

As she stood up, her hand slipped out of his grasp, fingertips sliding across his, meeting for half a second before they were free.


	4. Chapter 4

 “Shit,” Joker’s voice broke the silence that had settled over the cockpit like a whip cracking through the air.

Alenko shut down the communications replay. A routine pick-up mission had just gone sideways in more ways than anyone could have imagined. There shouldn’t have been resistance, period. To top it off, Alenko didn’t like that the ‘who’ in all this wasn’t clear. No mention of names or insignias that stood out in the footage. Unclear enemies made for messy mission parameters.

And that ship… he couldn’t claim to be familiar with every dreadnought in every fleet, but he didn’t need to. The design didn’t match any known manufacturer on the grid, civilian or military. Not to mention the fact that dreadnoughts didn’t have the power to land planetside if they also wanted to get back into space.

The specs on his board put it an impossible size of two kilometers. The largest in known Council space measured it at just over a kilometer. Alenko didn’t need to ask Joker to know it wouldn’t match any known records.

“Alenko,” Shepard barked and he twisted in his seat, unsurprised, “Time to suit up. We’re going in hot.”

“Aye aye, ma’am.”

Before the words were even out of his mouth he was on his feet, following her through the CIC, down the stairs, and into the elevator. She held the door open long enough for him to catch up with a sharp slap of her hand over the sensor. Alenko hit the button for the cargo bay and the doors hissed closed as soon she released her hand.

Shepard stalked out ahead of him before the doors even finished opening once they arrived at their destination, and he quickly followed in her footsteps.

The atmosphere in the cargo bay was tense. Or maybe that was his nerves concerning the video they’d just witnessed reflecting on the environment. As far as he knew, Jenkins hadn’t been near the cockpit, and it was unlikely he’d been invited to the comm room with Shepard. So he hadn’t seen the vid.

Jenkins stood by the lockers, dutifully pulling his suit over his limbs. Alenko marched up to him and, when Jenkins turned around, understanding Alenko’s intent, zipped him up before opening his own locker. Then he stripped down to his briefs and undershirt in an uneasy silence as Shepard did the same on the other side of him. While Alenko was eager to hear what the standing orders would be, muffled talking through the exchanging of clothes for undersuits wasn’t conducive to a constructive conversation.

Ten minutes later they were fully armored, plating adjusted and suit tech online, integrating medi-gel systems to key areas in case anyone was hit. All Alenko had left was his amp. He rifled through his locker for the small case and flipped the lid. The amp was less than a centimeter in width, and only a few centimeters long, designed by Polaris.

“Need some help?”

Shepard slid up next to him and though she was easily a foot shorter than him, in armor her presence was magnified. So even as he looked down to talk to her, he felt rather like he was looking directly across  _to_  her.

Before handing the amp over, he asked, “You worked with an L2 before?”

A ghost of an expression he couldn’t quite put to words flitted across her face, gone before he could even fully register it. “It’s been a few years since I hit dirt with an L2, but I still remember the differences between setup.”

She accepted the case and he turned around, removing the protective covering over the port. A second later, surprisingly delicate hands pressed against the back of his neck, sending shivers down his spine for reasons he’d take to his grave (and would be embarrassed to ever admit) as the amp slid into place and connected with a short buzz that spread through his limbs. Shepard checked the port and locked it, then tapped him on the shoulder.

“Thanks,” he said.

“No problem.”

Jenkins stared wide-eyed at the both of them.

“Ah, youth,” Shepard murmured, barely loud enough for him to hear.

He wasn’t even sure if she’d meant the words for him or not, but he nodded nonetheless. The Corporal was only twenty-one and had all the exuberance of a newly enlisted marine on his first mission, despite the fact that he’d been hitting dirt for well over a year now.

“It’s so small.” Jenkins eyes were big as saucers.

“It kind of has to be,” Alenko replied and Jenkins jumped as if he hadn’t actually thought he’d voiced his exclamation aloud. Alenko pointed at the back of his neck, feeling marginally like an object on display. “Not a lot of space if you want to still be able to look around once the stick* is in.”

As if sensing his discomfort, Shepard refocused their attention. “Alright, weapons check.”

Jenkins mouth clicked shut, whatever he’d been about to say abandoned as he obeyed the Commander’s orders. Alenko silently thanked her for the small reprieve.

He’d  _thought_  Jenkins had gotten his fill the other day when Alenko had tossed him across the room during a routine amp check.

Once their guns were attached to their mag clips, diagnostics giving them the all clear, the Commander rounded the squad up in front of her. “Mission’s gone to shit. Enemy is unclear, resistance likely. Jenkins, this is your home?”

Jenkins nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

Shepard brought up her ‘tool and opened a map. “We’re dropping here. Familiar terrain?”

Jenkins peered over her wrist. “Not really, Commander. It’s been a few years, and I’m from the far side. Near the farmers. But there is a pass here that cuts through the mountain.”

“Good, drop point is just behind this ridge.”

Putting the Normandy out of firing range of the unmarked enemy vessel. Stealth systems wouldn’t do shit if the other ship had a line of sight. Of course, that meant they had a trek ahead of them.

“Alenko.” He snapped his eyes up to hers, away from the map. “You run with a sniper before?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Catch on quick?”

“I tend to.”

“Good, walk with me.”

Alenko followed her to the weapons bench, where she retrieved an old metallic, purple case and opened it up. ‘Shepard, Olivia J.’ was stamped on the side. It contained a spotter’s scope and two rifle attachment scopes, one of which was wrapped in a piece of cloth that had clearly seen some damage and had… flowers? on it. The other scope was bare - older and bigger, and seemed to hold sentimental value judging by the way Shepard’s fingers briefly brushed against it before she cast a sideways glance at him.

She handed him the spotters scope and then retrieved the newer attachment scope after removing it delicately from its fabric encasement. Then she fished out a case that would attach to his belt. “Don’t break it, Lieutenant.”

He hung it next to his gun holster and tested the reach, satisfied, while she attached her scope to her sniper rifle. “Wouldn’t dream of it, Commander.”

Shepard removed something else from a side pocket inside the case, but he didn’t see what it was before she shut it and shoved it back into its spot below the bench before turning to face him. She folded her arms across her chest as best as one could while wearing armor.

“Don’t know if I’ll even need a spotter this mission, but since shit hit the fan and we don’t know what we’re up against, it’s better to be prepared. Lift it up.” She tapped her eye for emphasis.

He raised the scope as commanded. The HUD was impressive, data streaming across the screen and he suddenly didn’t envy a sniper’s job in the  _least_. “You ever spot for yourself?”

Shepard’s mouth clicked shut before she replied, “A lot of the time, actually. Better with a spotter, though.”

“And less lonely, I’d imagine.”

He regretted the words almost instantly, especially as he lowered the scope and saw Shepard staring at him with a blank expression, eyes clouded. Foot in mouth syndrome struck again and he mentally kicked himself.

“Yes.” She didn’t take her eyes off of him and the intensity almost burned. “I was hoping we could have one on one time before sticking you in the dirt next to me, but no such luck.”

She launched into a brief but information packed explanation of spotting and he felt like he understood it enough to be at the very least effective in the field. The whole conversation was tinged with just a bit of coldness and Alenko couldn’t help thinking that he’d inadvertently struck a nerve. One that he wouldn’t have guessed existed if someone had asked him ten minutes prior.

Now he thought he had an inkling of where her military reputation came from. Though it was always whispered by people who’d only encountered her and never worked with her, as far as he could tell. Whispered by people like Jake who hadn’t actually met her, not to throw his friend under the bus, and latched onto by the media.

Alenko knew something of a reputation preceding someone.

Not to mention he was the dipshit who’d set her off; for some definition of ‘set her off’. And not to mention the fact that he’d talked to her without her reputation clouding the conversation previously, and their interaction hadn’t been anything remotely close to this cool.

… And he was officially putting too much thought into the matter. Way more than he should.

“I think I’ve got the basics,” he said once she’d finished her explanation and they went over a few of the details.

“I don’t need precision,” she replied, “My scope has detailed readouts of wind speeds and weather conditions, fed by my ‘tool. But the scope is limited in visual range, and secondary distance calculations are always helpful with accuracy.”

“I won’t miss a target.”

She nodded, accepting his assurances at face value. Smart marines knew their limitations, so if he said he he wouldn’t miss, he wouldn’t miss.

The elevator doors opened, letting out Captain Anderson followed quickly by Nihlus. Alenko didn’t miss the very quick once over the Spectre did of the hold, nor the fact that his calculating gaze lingered on Shepard for a couple seconds longer than anything else. Even though she wasn’t facing the doors and hadn’t seen his evaluative stare, she squared her shoulders nonetheless, giving the impression of a predator on the prowl. Eyes sudden blue ice as she jerked her head back towards Jenkins and Alenko followed her.

The Captain and Nihlus met them there.

“ _Opening cargo bay doors,”_  Joker announced over the comm. Ten seconds later, the door shuddered open, the hole widening until it was slanted just enough to let a person through with some head room. Wind rushed through, ruffling his hair for a few seconds until he snapped his helmet in place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Stick: shorthand slang for the amp as it's (in this story at least) a couple centimeter long, slim device that slides into the port on the back of the head. There are no shortage of 'driving stick' jokes in the military in reference to teams sporting biotics.


	5. Chapter 5

Shepard stood just in front of Alenko, providing cover for him as he examined Jenkins’ body, eyes scanning the edges of the ridge now that they knew their HUD was next to useless. Whatever these things were, their field tech was off the charts. The little engineer inside of her itched to get her fingers on it. Too bad the one laying at her feet showed signs of hardware detonation, obscuring whatever tech set these drones apart. Someone didn’t want them to find out what they were.

“Rotate your scanning frequencies.”

It was the best solution she could come up with till they had time to examine one of the drones in detail and figure out how they stayed off combat radar.

Alenko’s words were muffled as he spoke. “Already done.”

She grunted, still examining the ridge, eyes trailing to the section where the path rounded sharply out of view. She dismissed the abrupt edge approximately ten meters from their position. It was a sheer drop of about two-hundred meters - not something even drones would scale for an ambush when there were better methods of boxing them in a corner like lab rats. “Area’s clear for now.”

She turned to look at Alenko as he stood up and said, “Drone ripped right through his shields. Never had a chance.”

Judging by his eyes, he was hurting. The LT wore his heart on his sleeve and it was hard for her to not resonate in anguish with him, but she was in command. She’d trained for this. No one made it through Special Forces without being able to compartmentalize.

She had all the practice she needed at shutting down.

“We’ll see that he receives a proper service once the mission is complete,” she said, partially to mollify him; and to make sure he remained on point, she added, “But I need you to stay focused.”

His eyes locked with hers, amber sorrow quickly masked with military training. “Aye aye, ma’am.”

She hadn’t meant to come across as cold as she sounded to her own ears, but nothing to be done for it now. So with his assured ‘aye ma’am’ she brought up her ‘tool and they attempted to map out a new route with the threat of drones at the forefront of their strategy, factoring in his biotics and her sniping.

Handing him the spotters scope no longer seemed like a longshot idea, and she was grateful he’d picked up the basics decently quick, considering it’d probably been years since he last held a sniper rifle. Most marines didn’t pick them up again after leaving basic. Even more of them never touched a spotters scope in their entire career.

She almost missed her sniping squad days.

The terrain was unforgiving, and try as they might to find a different option, the only way to go was forward. Straight around the sharp corner where drones had zipped forth without so much as announcing their presence on combat radar. She didn’t like it, and Alenko clearly didn’t like it either.

“Ridge is too vulnerable and we don’t have climbing gear, otherwise I’d suggest that,” he said as she closed her ‘tool.

“Too bad we couldn’t have dropped in closer.”

“The zone would have been too hot,” Alenko murmured.

Shepard cast him a sideways glance and brought out Mjolnir*, successfully resisting the urge to make a ‘hammer time’ joke because Alenko wouldn’t get it. A ghost of laughter flitted in the back of her mind. A big marine and a slender one standing next to each other who appreciated the joke, as one of them had put the idea of the name for her rifle into her mind in the first place.

-O-

Shepard slithered up the slope, Alenko crouched a bit further down near an outcropping, awaiting her orders. The whole mountainside had been crawling with those godforsaken drones, zipping between boulders and trees and crevices, forcing her and Alenko into a slow advance.

He’d proved to be a decent spotter, pre-emptively using the scope to fish out targets way ahead of them and marking them for her on the HUD. The ones that got too close, he hit with warp fields, which, while not as effective against inorganic targets, at least made them glow blue for the duration of the field, making them easier to target. The one she didn’t get, he did. With a pistol. A heavy pistol, but still a pistol.

Now they’d hit a valley that had been suspiciously free of resistance. She rather doubted they’d cleaned out the drones.

“ _See anything?”_  Alenko’s voice filtered over the comm.

She peered through her rifle and surveyed the open area ahead of them. “It’s quiet. Wide open, no points of cover for about a hundred meters. We’ll be sitting ducks if we get caught out there in an ambush.”

“ _Shit.”_

“Too bad we don’t have a drone of our own,” she muttered.

“ _Knew I should have gone engineer all the way.”_

Shepard twitched, the initial urge to jump overpowered by a decade of military experience. She hadn’t meant her remark to carry over the comm.

“ _Maybe send out a tech mine,”_  Alenko suggested,  _“I could float it out, see if it catches attention.”_

“Come on up.”

A few seconds later, he slithered up next to her while she grabbed some raw materials from her belt and spooled up the fab unit on ‘tool. When it dropped into her hand half a minute later, still warm, Alenko said, “Toss it, I’ll catch it.”

Shepard threw it like a frisbee. He caught it with a smooth mnemonic, only his fist glowing a faint blue as he guided the mine out into the valley. It floated about a meter over the ground.

Nothing assaulted it for the duration of its travels, which was a hell of lot farther than she’d have guessed. Alenko’s base skill was shaping up to be greater than any other biotic she’d worked with. Not that she’d worked with  _many_ , but still. Rumors that L2’s were stronger than L3’s clearly weren’t exaggerated - though his range extended beyond Slip’s.*

“What do you think those spikes are in the distance?” she asked as the mine dropped to the ground and Alenko released his field.

“Not native to the colony. At least not Alliance dig sites.”

“Filing that under the ‘not good’ category.”

Alenko grunted and then looked to her, the question for orders in his eyes but not on his lips.

She had a weird feeling on the back of her neck, not quite like being watched. More like they were sitting ducks and would be target practice entering the valley. Instincts honed by a decade plus of military experience, then fine tuned at Rio.

“Let’s move forward. Slowly.”

They slipped back down the hill. Rising on a ridge was asking for a bullet to the head, regardless of floating tech mines designed to draw out enemy fire. The weird almost-being-watched feeling continued tickling the back of her skull. Once they were far enough down, they stood up. Shepard reaching that point a couple meters ahead of Alenko. One reason why she’d so often been selected for the high lookouts when she’d just been a ground-pounder.

They circled the base of the small hill and moved towards the mouth of the valley with their guns raised. She had Mjolnir out, her muscles ready to react and lower herself to a knee at the first sign of trouble, so she could a) not block Alenko’s view and b) hold her rifle steady. Well, steadier. She had a lot of practice at sniping on the run, but it still messed with her accuracy to do so.

The valley remained quiet for the duration of their trek through it, though Shepard was glad to be out of the walking dead zone and back into area that had a modicum of cover in the form of boulders and trees. She breathed a sigh of relief as her back hit the nearest boulder, Alenko following suit a half second later, squeezing in next to her as she brought up the terrain map again.

He leaned out and examined their surroundings while she navigated the display. Only a kilometer out from the dig site, and only one check in from Nihlus mentioning a space port.

“Ridge on either side of the channel, couple of large boulders. Downhill trek, so we have that to our advantage,” Alenko listed off before ducking back down. “No tangos in sight. Those spikes are just around the bend.”

She closed her ‘tool. “I’ll take the left, you take the right.”

“Aye aye.”

They readied their weapons and when she gave the signal, they both tore out on either side of the boulder, heading in their respective directions. Her first piece of cover put her about ten meters behind Alenko, and she hit it first, providing cover for him in case anything shot out.

Nothing did.

As soon as he was in place, Shepard slipped out - and immediately took a hit square in the chest as synthetic platforms crashed around the bend fifty meters ahead of them, hot on the heels of a marine running for her life.

Shepard’s shields absorbed most of the impact, but the battery fried and she scooted on her ass back behind the boulder, not even aware she’d fallen, but not surprised either. The remaining slug that  _had_  gotten through had punched a nice crack in her breast plate, just inches above her right breast. Only a well-placed sniper shot would have that kind of power from this distance. It was going to leave a nasty bruise.

Not to mention the armorer wouldn’t be too pleased at having to repair the damage.

“ _Commander, what’s your situation?”_  Alenko’s voice was like a slap to her face as he repeated his question through gritted teeth.

She thumbed her comm link open. “I’m fine. Ignore me and cover that marine.”

Shepard slammed the new battery pack into her shield generator before it had time to even drop out of the fab unit on her ‘tool, and smeared a small pack of omni-gel over the crack in her armor to seal it.

Just in time to cover Alenko’s ass as his position was riddled with bullets, forcing him back down low to the ground. She scoped the nearest platform advancing on his meager cover, breathed out, and fired.

She immediately ducked back down as the heat eased up on Alenko, having turned on her. Shepard sidled alongside the edge of the rock she was using for cover as she waited for the heat sink to cycle and cool, her fab unit dumping out a sabotage mine to overheat the enemy weapon heat sinks and give them a reprieve.

“You got a bead on the marine?” she asked, scrambling to a small rock-face protruding from the edge of the cliff-face a few meters away. It was just large enough for her to squeeze behind so she could track Alenko’s position and work on her next move. He was still behind the same rock, now a few meters behind her on the other side.

“ _The… things stopped advancing as soon as they spotted us and she managed to get into cover. Approximately fifteen meters up, your side. Might be out of view from your angle, she’s barely in mine. Plan?”_

“Got a sabotage mine ready to lay down. I’m gonna assess the situation and then chuck it. Cover me.” Shepard peered around the edge as Alenko laid down suppressive fire coupled with a few biotic throws that knocked a couple of unlucky platforms caught unaware on their asses. Well, if they had asses.

She counted six of them up, grouped together, and seven on the ground. No drones in the air, so at least they didn’t have to contend with that. Perhaps they’d exhausted their supply. She could hope, but she wasn’t banking on it.

After a quick assessment, she threw her tech mine - and was pleasantly surprised when it swiveled in the air as Alenko caught in a biotic field and swung it right onto the target she’d been aiming at, keeping it raised for maximum range efficiency as she detonated it.

The gunfire from the enemies quickly ceased giving them a window of opportunity, and within seconds, the platforms themselves were reduced to bits of broken tech on the ground. She regrouped with Alenko and they carefully proceeded down the path towards the marine now ensuring the things really were dead with expertly placed point blank headshots.

When they were within a couple meters of her, she turned and saluted. “Thank you, Commander. You pulled my ass out of the fire. Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams of the 212.” Williams glanced at Alenko before returning her gaze back to Shepard. “You the one in charge here, ma’am?”

Instead of answering, taking in the blood on the Chief’s armor, Shepard asked, “Are you wounded, Williams?”

“A few scrapes and bruises. Nothing serious.” Her hands absentmindedly scraped at the blood on her armor. Not hers. “The others… the others weren’t so lucky.”

Shepard recognized the shake in the woman’s voice and felt a pang resonate deep in her gut. She squashed it, hard - and felt Alenko’s solid presence as he stepped closer, just off her right shoulder.

-O-

Shepard hunkered down and pressed herself right up against Alenko’s back as he opened his ‘tool to deactivate the last bomb. Williams provided cover fire from the opposite side of the catwalk, while Shepard braced herself against Alenko, using him as a counterbalance as she aimed down the gangway and took out anything that so much as peeped around a crate.

She hated fighting in space ports and docks. Too many boxes and inevitably, someone started yelling afterwards about damaged goods and who was going to pay for it.

“Progress?” she asked.

Alenko grunted, fully focused on the task at hand. She took it to mean ‘not yet but almost there’.

The bombs were tricky fuckers, and Alenko was the fastest at disarming them. Even still, each one took a solid minute, and that was time they didn’t have. She slid backwards next to him and glanced at the timer counting down from twenty seconds - and looked at Alenko. His brow furrowed in concentration as he continued the disarming process.

She chose not to worry and turned back to guarding his six. He’d get it done.

“ _Area is clear, Commander,”_ Williams reported over the comm. Shepard confirmed on her radar, which, combined with intel Williams had picked up in the field, and what little data they could pull from the geth cores after they blew upon deactivation, they’d managed to get a working scanning frequency going.

“Hang back, just in case.”

“ _Bomb still ticking?”_

“Alenko will get it done.”

After all, a man who could peg an omni-tool at a glance knew his shit. The bomb didn’t stand a chance. It just didn’t know it yet.

“It’s done.” Alenko fell back on his feet, making sure to not knock her over as he did so, and heaved a sigh of relief. “Almost didn’t think I was gonna get it.”

Shepard stood up as he removed his helmet and wiped his brow. “You had it.”

She held out her hand and he looked up at her before taking it, using her as a counterbalance to stand up - which was when she noticed the blood running down his face. She maintained her grip on his hand to prevent him from turning away and fished out a tube of medi-gel from her belt.

Williams slipped up behind them, rifle still out but pointed low. Alert.

“Ma’am?” Alenko asked.

She released her grip on him and opened the tube. “You’re bleeding.”

He sucked in a breath between his teeth when she applied the gel to the cut on his face, using the back of her glove to wipe the residual blood away.

“Thanks,” he said once she’d finished.

She tapped his helmet, still held at his side. “Must have been a lucky piece of shrapnel that slipped through.”

“Didn’t even notice.”

The corner of her mouth twitched in a grin. “Clearly. Alright, Chief. Where would the beacon be?”

Williams glanced back at them. “East side, just down the ramp. Only dock big enough for a frigate at this port.”

“Hopefully the geth didn’t take it with them.”

Shepard grunted in agreement. The mission had already gone to shit, resulting in the death of the Spectre who was supposed to have been assessing her for Spectre candidacy. A lost beacon would be the cherry on top of an already shit cake.

She said, “Keep your eyes peeled,” and began moving in the direction Williams had indicated.

The ramp wasn’t far. The dock was blessedly clear - and the beacon was right where Williams had said it would be. Shepard frowned up at it, towering above them. Looking like nothing she’d ever seen before, certainly nothing she’d at other Prothean excavations sites. Not that she wasn an archaeologist or anything, but this seemed like a pretty big find - and that was probably why the Council had dumped resources into this mission in the first place.

“What’s it doing?” Alenko marveled next to her and Williams shook her head.

“Wasn’t doing anything like that at the digsite.”

Alenko asked Williams a question, queuing up his omni-tool but Shepard didn’t pay it any attention as she moved off to the side so she could radio in the location,  _finally_. Report in some good news.

“Joker, sending our coordinates now for extraction. The beacon is secure.” True to her word, she fired off the coordinates from her ‘tool straight to the ship’s main computer. “Also tagging Jenkins and Nihlus’ bodies for retrieval.”

“ _Roger that, Commander. Picking up Jenkins’ body first. ETA ten minutes.”_

“Copy that, Normandy. Have all hostile ships evacuated the area?”

“ _Lidar is clear.”_

Williams joined her and Shepard nodded at her, acknowledging the question she knew the woman had. “We picked up a marine stationed here on our way to the digsite. Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams of the 212. Her unit was destroyed.”

“ _Relaying information to the Captain. Standby for orders.”_

Shepard smiled reassuringly at Williams as she waited and was about to update the Chief when the words died on her lips, the smile dropping away as she noticed Alenko bent over at the waist, struggling against  _something_.

She didn’t even think, just reacted, as she shoved Williams to the side and sprinted towards the Lieutenant. Vaguely aware of Joker issuing orders over the comm but not hearing the words as Alenko’s boots scraped across the deck and her heart leapt in her chest as he almost fell to his knees. Shepard jumped the remaining distance, her arms connecting around his middle, using the force of her connection to push that momentum into twisting and launching him away from the field that had captured him.

She hadn’t counted on it being so  _strong_  and found herself unable to escape. Most of her energy expended on freeing Alenko and her boots slipped out from under her as she didn’t have the footing Alenko’d had and she crashed onto the deck hard.

With her no longer able to struggle, the pull captured her fully, ripped her into the air, and her mind  _burned._ A fire in her brain if brains could feel and it was like every atom in her body was screaming. As if a beam of energy was connecting her molecules like dots and the pattern should have been  _something_ recognizable but it wasn’t. She tried to scream, but didn’t know how to get her vocal cords working. Eyes wide as she attempted to twist free, but she couldn’t because she was hanging in the air like a fish on the hook. Her heart thundered in her chest as the very essence of her being hummed higher and faster and louder and she was sure her limbs were singing in agony except that was impossible.

Terrifying spaceships and death. Burning planets. The screams of the dying and the echoes of the dead ringing in her ears and even though she could see the docking platform, she wasn’t  _there_. She could hear the pain but not make sense of the words and her whole head felt like it was on fire from straining to comprehend. She was a piece of string stretched too tight over a roaring inferno, terrible images seared into her mind and she couldn’t look away.

Her whole system was overloading and then it was over.

Shepard was already out, hanging limply in the air for a fraction of a second after the beacon finished transmitting before it exploded, flinging her through the air like a doll.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Mjolnir: the name of Olivia's second sniper rifle she purchased after the Blitz. Punisher X, Armax. Named Mjolnir after another member of her sniping squad joked that she could use it as a hammer.
> 
> * Slip: Call-sign for a member of her previous sniping squad unit, Glenn Delgado.


	6. Chapter 6

Alenko exited the Captain's quarters, having turned in his official mission report for Eden Prime. The whole thing had left him with a headache that threatened to tip over the verge, and even though coffee was probably the last thing he should have in case it set him off, he moved towards the mess and poured himself a cup.

He hadn't slept since they'd returned from Eden Prime and that had been nearly thirteen hours ago. Couldn't sleep as long as the Commander was still unconscious, taking a hit that had been meant for him. So coffee it was. Or rather, more coffee.

Even writing the report, stringing together bits of data he'd managed to collect from his open omni-tool, hadn't completely absolved him of the guilt he felt, because Shepard was lying on a bed in the medbay because of a security field or something Prothean that he'd activated. By all rights, the unconscious body should have been his.

"LT, you look like shit."

Alenko looked up from the counter as Williams slid into the mess, gently shoving him out of the way so she, too, could access the coffee pot.

She glanced up at him as she pulled a mug out of the cabinet. "Might wanna get some sleep before the political showdown."

For emphasis she pointed both fingers as if they were guns and fired off shots in his general direction.

"Can't sleep," he replied.

At least one good thing had come out of the whole mess: Williams' transfer to the Normandy. He was glad that the Captain agreed with his assessment that Williams belonged on the roster. She would have been reassigned regardless, so the fact that she'd been reassigned here was pleasing. He'd mentioned in his report that he believed the Commander would agree, and Captain Anderson believed him on that account, too, after reading through the mission details during their debrief.

Filling in for the CO's shoes wasn't something he was used to doing.

"Don't beat yourself up over Shepard. From what I've read, she's the type who'd go through hell for her team."

Alenko arched an eyebrow as he leaned against the counter. "From what you've read?"

Williams flopped herself onto the nearest bench and said, "Don't get a lot of action pounding the same guard post every day on a planet so close to earth. And there's more than a fair share of articles written about the Commander. Press have got their noses shoved so far up her ass it's a wonder they can still breathe."

Alenko snorted. He largely ignored the press, but the notion didn't surprise him. Notable war heroes weren't often left alone - something he'd noticed went cross-species, too. For the most part. Salarians tended to not idolize, but they still had their versions of celebrities. Hell, Jon Grissom was still hounded by reporters and it'd been nearly three decades since his big moment in the spotlight.

The media tended to cling to their icons until there was nothing left.

"So," Williams continued, pulling Alenko out of his silent musings, "looks like you guys are stuck with me. Reassigned."

"I heard," he answered. "The Captain put the official request through about an hour ago."

"I'm just glad you two were there to pull my ass out of the fire. It was looking pretty grim down there. You gonna sit down?"

"What?" Alenko looked up at her again. Perhaps he was a little more tired than he thought, and maybe more coffee wouldn't fix it. The headache was still pulsing, but hadn't boiled over into anything serious. He shrugged his shoulders and emptied his mug. "Gonna go check on the Commander, actually."

And take something for the oncoming migraine, but he left that part unsaid. He wasn't one for flaunting the adverse effects of his implant. Especially when other L2's had it worse.

Williams shook her head at him, but said nothing as he left.

The medbay was empty, except for Shepard of course. Still lying unconscious on the medical bed. He walked over to her after digging out some pain meds, careful to not make a noise so as not to disturb her per Doctor Chakwas' previous orders when he'd stood vigil while writing his reports. The first for the mission, the second on Jenkins' death. Both reports should have fallen under Shepard's purview, but given the circumstances, the task fell to him.

Lying on the bed was the second smallest he'd seen her.

The only time he'd seen her appear smaller was when she'd crumpled to the ground at his feet after the beacon exploded.

Both of those incidents were nothing anyone had seen coming. After working the mission with her, he would have bet more money on the beacon exploding than her being taken down if presented with the option.

He still couldn't rid himself of the notion that it was his fault, that she wouldn't be there if it weren't for him somehow... activating it. Or stepping inside it's 'reach' as it had already appeared to be live. He should have known better than to get within range of an alien artifact that appeared to be 'on', the purpose of which was unknown. And because of that ignorance, Shepard was paying the price.

"I'm sorry I let you down, Commander," he said.

Shepard remained motionless on the bed.

Well, not completely motionless. He moved closer. She was  _shivering_. Which wasn't surprising, given that she'd been stripped down to her small clothes and was only covered with a thin standard issue blanket.

He glanced around the floor, but didn't notice any extra fallen blankets that might account for the shift in temperature. So he raided the cabinets until he found an extra one and gently draped it over her, careful not to brush the sensitive tissue around the bruise forming on her chest where she'd taken the surprise sniper hit that'd had him practically shitting his pants with worry that he'd lost  _everyone_  on the team and would have to do it alone. If he could have done it alone. Probably not, judging from the resistance. They were lucky they'd encountered Williams when they had, as the extra backup had been vital for disarming the bombs.

His fingers brushed against a small metallic object, opposite her dogtags, as he ensured the blanket wrapped around her shoulders and, curious, he picked it up. It was an old-fashioned bolt-action rifle bullet, attached to a chain. He'd heard of some sniper superstitions, but this was a bit of an odd one considering they'd moved past conventional bullets half a century ago. Probably what she'd retrieved out of her case pre-mission, since he didn't recall seeing it on her before then.

He let it fall back to the bed.

Writing up Jenkins' Official Cause of Death - faulty shield generator, which resulted in a complete gear check of the entire stock of field supplies on the ship - ranked up there as one of the worst things he'd had to do. Jenkins had just been a kid. To die in action on your home planet... that was rough. But if there was any place a marine could choose to die, home planet was probably the best option. Defending the ones you love.

Alenko settled into the chair Doctor Chakwas had provided him earlier. This time, with no report to keep his brain engaged, and running on fumes as he was, he drifted off to sleep.

-O-

Alenko jolted awake, unsure what had disturbed him at first as nothing immediately presented itself. He could hear the telltale signs of Doctor Chakwas on the far side of the room, sitting at her terminal - but nothing she was doing was particularly loud. In fact, the Doctor's presence could easily go unnoticed.

He rotated to look at Shepard just as her hand flopped onto his shoulder, and a tiny groan escaped her lips. He was up faster than he could blink, her hand sliding off and thumping against the bed. Still not quite awake, not yet.

"Doctor Chakwas?" he cast a glance over his shoulder. "I think she's waking up."

He turned back to Shepard before he had a chance to see the Doctor rise, only hearing the scrape of her stool as she stood up.

The Commander's eyes were open, but bleary and unfocused, and her hand smacked into him again as she raised both hands to rub her eyes. He backed away from the bed a few steps as the Doctor scooted in on the other side, twisting displays and readying equipment for a check up.

Which should have been his cue to leave. Yet since the Doctor didn't say anything, he stayed put. Might as well see this through, and get the dressing down he deserved and sort of expected Shepard to give him out of the way. The last time his ass had been chewed out was nearly five years ago. He was long overdue.

Doctor Chakwas pressed a hand against Shepard's forehead. "You had us worried there, Commander. How are you feeling?"

Her response was a groan that shot a new wave of guilt straight to his gut.

The Doctor grunted as she pulled the blankets covering Shepard down to her waist while the Commander blearily sat up.

"Is it possible for your head to feel like a tennis ball?"

Doctor Chakwas arched an eyebrow. Alenko was rather confused himself.

"Care to clarify that one, Commander?"

"Don't 'Commander' me when I'm in my skivvies. It's weird." Shepard finally dropped her hands and opened her eyes completely. They immediately went wide as soon as she saw him standing near the foot of her bed. But she carried on with her explanation instead of remarking on his presence, shifting her gaze to the Doctor. "You know how tennis balls get whacked really hard and then whizz off at nearly the speed of light?"

Doctor Chakwas stared at her. "So you have a headache and feel a little dizzy."

"Bingo."

"Fortunately for you we stock high-end pain meds for just that sort of thing."

"Great. So." Doctor Chakwas whisked away to a med cabinet, grumbling about marines, and Shepard shifted her gaze to Alenko. "What the hell happened? Wait. How long have I been out, then the other one."

"Nearly fifteen hours," he replied. "The beacon on Eden Prime exploded. Unstable field, ancient artifact. Based on readings I managed to catch from my omni-tool, it appears to have been caused by a system overload. The thing couldn't take its own power. The blast threw you clear across the dock."

Shepard mumbled something he didn't catch and rubbed her shoulder.

"I had to carry you to the LZ while Williams coordinated the extraction."

"Did you run with urgency?"

Alenko nearly tripped over his own tongue, stammering out a yes, and Shepard's lips tugged towards a smile. When he finally found his mental footing, he continued, the Doctor returning with a sly grin of her own as she handed Shepard the pain meds. "I must have activated some sort of security protocol by getting too close. You were exposed to the field when you had to push me out of the way. Probably what set it off."

The hint of a smile dropped off Shepard's face in a flash.

"I didn't  _have_ to do anything. Would I have been remiss in my duties as the Commanding Officer of the ground team? Sure, but no one would have questioned me  _not_  leaping to your rescue in time to prevent you from suffering the consequences." She leaned forward, eyes intense. "The fact is no one could have known what would happen. We've never encountered a Prothean beacon before, nor do we know what the hell they  _do_. It was fifty-thousand goddamn years old, so if you're expecting me to dress you down for my ass ending up on the line in place of yours when I made that call, you can march out of this medbay right now. It's not gonna happen."

Her hand dropped sharply from pointing at the door to the bed and Alenko stared at her dumbfoundedly. That wasn't the dressing down he'd expected, to say the least. He wasn't even sure if it  _counted_  as one. For one thing, she hadn't called him an FNG who needed to grab his head out of his own ass.

"Always exciting with N's in your medbay," Doctor Chakwas mused as she finished her med scans of the Commander. "Especially when you mix them with stubborn Lieutenants who stand vigil when their commanding officer does something stupid after said Lieutenant did something stupid."

Doctor Chakwas pointedly looked only at her med-scanner, examining the results. "I detected some unusual REM activity. Reviewing your helmet cam footage didn't reveal anything interesting, but perhaps you can shed some light on the issue."

Alenko perked up from leaning against the foot of the bed, embarrassment forgotten as Doctor Chakwas rotated a display and queued up Shepard's helmet cam footage from the mission.

Shepard's words were loud and clear as she communicated with Joker, Williams rounding into view. It wasn't until she rotated to fully to address the Chief that Alenko spotted himself, struggling against the beacon, just over Williams' left shoulder. That image lasted for only a split second as Shepard shoved the Chief out of the way and ran towards him, throwing him clear. His own footage would show his helmet cracking as a result, having hit the deck hard, his head bouncing with all the effectiveness of a bowling ball.

Shepard's cam, however, revealed very little. Except the keen mewling he'd vaguely heard as Williams held him back - only louder. A harsh, pitiful sound full of pain that triggered a level of anxiety in the back of his brain, escaping through the back of her throat. The almost scream ended abruptly and the view dropped back, undoubtedly signifying a loss of consciousness, a full ten seconds before the beacon exploded.

Alenko looked away, not eager to see his commanding officer thrown clear across the docking platform again. He heard but didn't see himself running up to her, shouting, 'Shepard!' before the Doctor cut the feed.

"I saw… something," Shepard offered into the silence that followed. "People getting slaughtered by synthetics. Ships? Lots of death. Felt like I was choking on it. I tried to scream."

During the mission, Shepard had come off a bit cold. Cold orders and a calculating perspective on what needed to get done. Prioritizing at its finest, and not something most people would be surprised to see coming out of an N. He'd been a little surprised if only because he had a chance to meet the woman first, without the veil of celebrity and everything that came attached to her name. And he'd  _liked_  it. The woman. She was warm if a little quiet. And not at all in line with image of Commander Shepard - until they'd hit dirt together.

But this? This quiet admission with a slight shake in her voice and an altogether different kind of chill? This was something else, and that unsettled him more than her words.

"Hmm," Doctor Chakwas set her datapad down on a nearby table, "I'll have to add that to my report. As far as I can tell, you're good to go, though I'm restricting you to light duty for the next 24 hours. Captain Anderson wants to see you as soon as you're dressed. I'll go ahead and let him know you're awake."

"Thanks, Doc," Shepard replied. After the Doctor had moved away a few steps, Shepard looked back at him. "You didn't march out."

Alenko shrugged. "You made some good points."

She smiled faintly at him and swung her legs over the edge. "Good."

"Oh, before I forget," Alenko opened the side pocket of his fatigues and retrieved the spotter's scope Shepard had given him for the mission, still tucked into its case. "I gathered the impression that touching the case was something I shouldn't do. Williams confirmed the impression. Said snipers were sticklers with their gear and then muttered something about superstitions and rituals."

He handed it to her and Shepard accepted it slowly. "Williams is aboard the ship then?"

"Yeah," he replied, "Orders came through the comm while we waited at the LZ for the Normandy. Captain Anderson finalized the transfer a couple of hours ago."

"Good," Shepard said, still looking at the scope in her hands, her expression thoughtful. "I worried about her."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's coming out a day late - sorry! Out of town this past weekend, and my schedule has been all over the place. Schedule should resume like normal next week.

Shepard had a hard time falling asleep. She rationalized it was due to the prolonged period of unconsciousness that had accompanied the beacon dumping shit into her brain before attempting to blow her up - but she knew that was mostly an excuse. It was  _really_  because of the content of said dumping. And said content disturbing pre-existing nightmare material. The two had fed off each other, creating dramatic flashes that barely let her keep her eyes closed for longer than ten seconds before they were bursting open again.

Every time she closed her eyes, she saw people dying. Heard their screams in the loud silence of the sleeper pod. So after two hours of attempting to get some rest, she'd torn out of it, taken a long, hot shower, and brewed some coffee.

That had been nearly five hours ago.

She'd sat in the mess, toured the decks, talked to the night crew a bit, and returned to the mess just in time for start of breakfast.

It was too late to try and get some shut eye, as people were beginning to crawl out of their pods and hit the showers. Williams stumbling bleary eyed offered some small amusement to her otherwise sleep-deprived state, especially when the Chief ran smack into Alenko on his way out of the showers and didn't even stop to apologize. Or register the collision.

Alenko's complete disregard for anything that wasn't coffee for the first five minutes of his 'wakefulness' had also provided early morning amusement when he'd casually ignored no fewer than three different greetings from the early shift crew. Only grunting once he had a cup in his hands before shortly disappearing into the showers. It was very reminiscent of the Captain, who'd come out approximately twenty minutes later and done nearly the exact same thing.

Of course, Anderson's morning routine had also included an arch of the eyebrow at Shepard slouched in the secondary lounge between the kitchen and the elevator, taking up half a bench. It was pretty obvious she'd been there a few hours, and Anderson undoubtedly thought she'd pulled an all-nighter. He wasn't very far off the mark, but it wasn't for the reasons he'd suspect.

Though maybe he knew that, too.

Anderson sat down across from her once he'd showered and gotten another cup of coffee and a muffin. "You gonna be here for the meeting, Shepard?"

She closed her 'tool and looked up at him. "Yeah."

"It's in thirty. No time to dodge off for shut eye."

Shepard glanced at Alenko as he rounded the corner, balancing a cup of coffee and a datapad in one hand and a plate of food in the other, hesitating for a fraction of a second before responding. "Couldn't get it if I wanted it."

"Ambassador Udina secured a Council meeting for 0900 hours, but he wants us in the office at 0800."

Shepard grumbled. Politicians always wanted everything yesterday from everyone but themselves. It didn't surprise her that Udina wasn't any different, but that didn't mean she had to like it.

"It's 0630 right now."

Shepard discreetly kicked the Captain under the table. "I know what time it is."

He only grinned as he rose. "See you, Shepard. Alenko."

The LT glanced up from his seat a couple meters away and nodded, before diving back into his pad. She was almost curious what the hell had his undivided attention, but also grateful, as that meant a reduced chance at him having heard her admit to not being able to sleep.

He already had gotten enough of her personal life the day before, sitting in on her check up with Doctor Chakwas. She liked being open with her junior officers, but wasn't used to them knowing the details of her nightmares. At least the one he'd heard about was centered around whatever the beacon had burned into her brain and not her standard affair. Not to mention completely expected after a traumatic experience. Though her standard nightmares had been mixed in as well. She just hadn't confessed their existence as they weren't exactly something new.

Perhaps a lie by omission when the Doctor had asked after what she'd seen, but any other night, she'd have seen the burning towers of Elysium or the smoky skyline of Mindoir.

"You were up early, Commander."

Shepard jolted in her seat, unaware that she'd spaced off in the first place, as Alenko set his pad down. "You could say that."

He scooted closer on the bench across from her. "Last time I was near a misfired grenade and got caught in the shockwave, I was out for ten hours. Didn't sleep for two days."

His disarming, earnest smile made her relax, some of the tension bleeding out of her shoulders. He'd given her a way out of the conversation should she want it - and she took it.

"Fifteen won't make that three days then, will it?"

He shrugged. "I mean mathematically speaking..."

"Well," she breathed out slowly, "shit."

"Oh no," Williams said, entering the lounge, "It's too early in the day for 'well shit', ma'am."

Alenko's eyes sparkled at her before he turned to the Chief and said, "Ground team has to go to the Council Meeting with Ambassador Udina. In case there are questions."

Williams peered over her shoulder, pausing in her pursuit of breakfast to frown. "Shit."

"Exactly."

Shepard made a mental note to buy Alenko a beer next time they had shore leave - even if it was only a few hours.

Williams sat down across from Alenko, right next to her. "No offense, Commander, but you look like shit."

Shepard gave Alenko an odd look as he shook his head while grinning, and said, "Thanks."

Williams spluttered around a mouthful of eggs, and Alenko chuckled on the other side of the table as he handed the Chief a napkin.

"It wasn't a compliment, Commander."

"Sure it was," she answered. "You wouldn't insult a sleep-deprived XO at 0630, would you?"

"You've got an odd sense of humor, ma'am."

Alenko looked up with a serious expression. "Was the Commander being funny?"

Something in Alenko's voice made her swear he was poking fun himself.

For her part, Williams looked between the two of them and muttered something about O's ganging up on her.

"Were you being funny, Commander?"

This time, she called it. Alenko was a deadpan kind of guy. She could play along with that. "Why did Susy fall off the swing?"

Alenko didn't even miss a beat as he said, "Because Susy's a loaf of bread."

"You two shitheads enjoy your breakfast," Williams stood up, shaking her head. "I'm gonna go eat in peace."

Once Williams had left, Shepard said, "She must think I'm really pretty. Two compliments before 0800."

Shepard was more tired than she thought, she realized. Joking so easily. Or maybe it was the company. She discreetly cast a glance at Alenko as he drummed his fingers on the table, looking at nothing in particular.

"I guess I'm only a little pretty," he mused.

-O-

The little round table in Captain Anderson's office hadn't been meant to seat three marines in addition to the Captain for an extended period of time. Three people, tops - and even that would have been pushing the crowded boundary in Alenko's estimation. As it was, Shepard's elbow kept bumping into his, and the XO had a propensity to stretch her legs out, which meant Shepard kept stepping on his toes and muttering apologies as she put them back.

Her restlessness was starting to affect him, he realized, as Williams eyed him sharply when  _he_ stretched out his legs and crushed her toes.

They'd already been at the table for forty-five minutes and were bound to be late if they didn't leave soon for Udina's office, but Anderson wanted to go over all the details one more time. Filing a report with the Council on a Council funded mission that had gone to shit, resulting in the death of a Spectre at the hands of another, on top of the destruction of a rare Prothean artifact and well, Alenko could understand the caution. Better to make Udina wait so they didn't have to deal with his political bullshit rather than make the Council wait.

Alenko wasn't exactly eager to go hopping through the Presidium just to please some politician, so when the forty-five stretched to fifty-five and Anderson gave them five minutes to stretch their limbs and hit the head, he didn't voice a complaint. All three of them jumped up as soon as Anderson said 'dismissed' and were out of his office faster than he could blink, Alenko hot on Shepard's heels while Williams crowded him from behind.

Both women stormed the bathroom. Alenko veered off towards the lounge and sighed in relief when the single sofa was completely free. He sprawled out over it, one foot resting on the floor, fully intending to not move an inch until time was up and he had to. For now, he had every intention of being a log. He considered opening his 'tool but decided against delving into anything he'd have to give up so soon. Though he could review the data he'd collected from the beacon the other day...

"You've got five seconds till I sit on your face," Williams said, looming over him.

Alenko simply scooted down the cushion till there was enough room for her to sit down, bending the one leg still on the sofa to accommodate the Chief. She grunted her approval and fell onto the couch next to him.

Shepard didn't even announce her presence before unceremoniously picking up his foot, sitting down, and dropping the leg in her lap as she slouched downwards and closed her eyes. Her arms crossed over his knee prevented him from moving and giving her more space, but as she didn't seem to mind, he decided not to worry about it. And now he didn't have to hold the limb up himself.

"First person that reminds me of the time gets a boot in the ass," she said after a moment.

That was the only thing said for their entire reprieve. None of them moved an inch, lying and sitting in companionable silence. Enjoying the brief moment between meetings, none of them looking forwards to trekking through the Citadel from one political meeting with a hidden agenda to another. Which was exactly how Anderson found them four minutes later as he exited his cabin, hand moving towards and then dropping away from the comm chip in his ear.

"You know," the Captain said, and three sets of eyes lit on him, "I'd expect this from Shepard who didn't sleep for shit last night, but you two?" Instead of continuing the thought, he simply shook his head. "On your feet, marines."

Alenko and Williams rose first, and he held out a hand to Shepard once he was on his feet, which she accepted with a grateful smile.

"Udina's probably chomping at the bit," Anderson said once they were all on their feet. "Better not waste more of his time than we already have."

Despite the seriousness of the words, he said it with a sly grin. There certainly wasn't any rush in his gait as they exited the ship and headed towards the elevator down the docks that would take them to C-Sec HQ. From there, they hoofed it to the Embassy, not hurrying, but not dallying either.

By the time they arrived at the Ambassador's office, it was half past eight. The Ambassador's face was blotchy with barely constrained frustration - and Alenko got the distinct impression it wasn't the first time Captain Anderson had kept Udina waiting.

It was a shame that his first time aboard the station, let alone stepping foot inside the Presidium ring, was spent rushing through all the sites he'd have liked to take a while to appreciate. He perfectly understood the reasoning behind the meeting, and even agreed that to some extent, having the ground team as backup insurance was a good idea. Well executed, too, as Udina clearly hadn't expected the Captain to bring the ground team. Shepard tapped him on the shoulder discreetly and jerked her head a fraction of an inch, just in time for him to catch the wicked gleam in the Captain's eyes as he listed off half a dozen excuses for why the marines had every right to be there. Especially concerning the nature of the mission that had gone to shit, and did Udina want the Council to have questions that they couldn't answer because the ground team had been left aboard ship?

The Ambassador's face had gone an ugly shade of purple at having that question directed towards him and he spat, "Of course not!"

Only Alenko's considerable military training kept him from laughing at the outburst.

Shepard slipped discreetly closer to the Captain while Ambassador Udina continued his rant, but Alenko and Williams hung back. Neither eager to draw more attention to themselves, whereas Shepard, judging by the tone of her voice as she interrupted Udina, was tired of the bullshit and thought Udina should know as much.

Coming from anyone else, Anderson would have silenced them. But XO's were expected to step up to the plate and not take shit when it came slinging their way.

The Commander certainly didn't take shit.

By the time Udina hussled them out of the office and towards the aircars waiting for them - muttering under his breath at having to call another for the marines - Alenko was more than relieved to be out of the stuffy office. Only made stuffy by Udina's presence, considering the big open windows.

Once the door was closed for their aircar, destination programmed in and autopilot engaged, Williams heaved a sigh from the back and said, "And that's why I hate politicians."

"I think even politicians hate politicians," Shepard agreed.

Alenko glanced at her. "Probably for the same reasons everyone else hates politicians."

"Hidden agendas, political backstabbing…" Williams listed off.

Shepard picked up right where she trailed off. "The veins in their foreheads threatening to burst."

"Hey," Williams' head poked between him and Shepard, "you think Udina had these things programmed, or can we skip out?"

"No man left behind, Chief," Shepard jerked her head towards the aircar ahead of them.


	8. Chapter 8

Shepard's first council meeting left her less than impressed with galactic government proceedings.

As soon as they'd entered the Citadel Tower proper, and she'd run into Detective Vakarian arguing with Executor Pallin about needing more time, her stomach had gotten that ugly little pit that said shit was about to hit the fan. Outcome not in their favor.

Indeed, the meeting had lasted all of ten minutes with the results of the 'investigation' final. Door closed, nothing more to say.

She was livid.

And not  _just_  because they'd insulted her character, but because they'd questioned the integrity of her whole ground team. Turned out bringing the marines had done fuck all in terms of providing testimony, because the Council didn't want to believe that one of their entrusted Spectres could actually be a prejudiced sack of shit who'd shot another behind their back.

Shepard put a hand discreetly on Alenko's arm as she felt him tense up during the final moments of the proceedings when they'd insulted her 'vision'. The gesture was mutually reassuring, as she wanted to rip the talons of the turian Councilor's hands and throw them in his face. Instead, she'd kept her face carefully neutral.

She imagined Kassy would have done the same thing as Alenko, gearing up for a fight on her behalf - which wasn't behavior she was used to outside of Kassy.

Alenko didn't look at her, but he did ease up, and she let her hand fall back to her side.

For once she agreed with Udina's rage, though not for the same reasons. Udina's were more politically motivated and he clearly saw this as humanity not getting the 'respect it deserved'. She was more inclined to see it as the Council being dumbasses and ignoring testimony that shakes the status quo. Some things carried across species, and it was to her unending disappointment that this was one of them.

As soon as they were clear of the petitioning platform and had moved off to one of the side rooms, Udina rounded on them and said before the door was even shut, "We need harder evidence. What we had wasn't good enough!"

Captain Anderson rolled his shoulders. "Perhaps we can get in touch with one of the detectives on the case. If they're willing to talk."

"Yes, yes," Udina muttered. His eyes were hot with intensity. "None of the turian detectives, though. They'll want to protect their own."

It made her sick that Udina actually thought that way, and she was about to say something when Alenko beat her to it. "We ran into one of the detectives on our way up. Detective..."

"Vakarian," Shepard supplied.

Alenko nodded and continued. "He was asking for more time, convinced he had a solid lead."

"Then Commander, you'll follow up with the Detective. Anderson, we can't have you on this case. Your history with Saren only made us look biased. It won't do to have you involved if we want to be taken seriously with this investigation."

Against her better judgement, Shepard stepped forward - this time Alenko discreetly putting his hand on her arm, but it wasn't enough to stop her. "You can't just take the Captain off his own mission."

Alenko's fingers stayed on her skin, dragging her arm back more with their touch than force despite the added pressure.

"No, he's right, Shepard. We don't want to muddy the water any more than we already have."

This time she listened to the added pressure and fell back. It was good to have someone on her team willing to check her behavior - even if she still wanted to take the turian Councilor’s talons and slap Udina across the face with them.

Udina continued as if the interruption hadn't happened - and as if he didn't notice the murder in her eyes. He probably didn’t, on either account, the way his eyes were looking more through them than at them. "We need something, and we need it fast. The sooner the better. Shepard, you have point on this operation-" Anderson nodded once as she bristled again at being ordered around by a politician "-take your team and get the information we need. It's out there, we just need to find it. Solid evidence. Anderson, meet me in my office in half an hour. We have some things we need to go over while the Commander does her job."

With that Udina whirled out of the office before she had time to be offended once more at the implication that she might  _not_  do her job.

Shepard turned to fully face Anderson and stepped towards him, feeling Alenko's fingers slip away - finally - from her elbow. Williams stepped forward with her, though the Chief was smart enough to let Shepard do the talking instead.

"What the hell is this?"

"In private, Shepard. Marines." The last was directed to Alenko and Williams who stepped out, Williams more reluctantly than the LT.

She didn't repeat her question when the room was clear, letting it linger in the air instead. Repetition would have been pushing her limits and anger at the situation wouldn't serve as a good enough justification for overstepping her bounds. The first outburst was already over-much and she knew it, but wasn't about to apologize either.

Anderson sighed and sat down in one of the chairs, gesturing for her to do that same, which she did. Once she was down he said, "I'll keep this brief so you can start your investigation because Udina’s right on that account. The sooner, the better.” He rubbed a hand over his head and took a deep breath. “Twenty years ago, I was up for Spectre candidacy. Short story? I didn't make the cut."

"And Saren?"

"My Nihlus."

She blew out air between her lips. Shit. She didn’t know Saren, hadn’t even met him before their vid-call interaction, but the Spectre had a bit of a reputation. Ruthless.

And the Captain up for Spectre candidacy? She could see it. Oh, she could definitely see it, especially with Ambassador Anita Goyle heading up the hunt. She was a tiger. Fierce and didn’t take shit. A bit of a bulldozer, but with more common sense than Udina appeared to have. If ever there was a politician Shepard would have liked, Goyle was probably it. Too bad the lady had retired.

"Saren’s always been prejudiced against humanity. You heard him in the meeting - thinks we need to 'learn our place'. And while he's not half wrong with the way Udina's bludgeoning our foot into the door, pressing issues that maybe shouldn't be pressed, he's not right either. Holds a grudge from the First Contact War, and I'm still not convinced he didn't do something to manipulate the parameters of our mission to reflect back on me. When shit hit the fan, he pinned it on all on me."

Shepard didn't know what to say - and so said nothing. Of course Udina would be aware of Anderson's prior selection for humanity's first Spectre. And the ambassador struck her as the type to hold a grudge, even when he wasn’t personally wronged. In fact, it explained a lot of their interactions more clearly. Why Udina was always so short with the Captain - and why the Captain kept him waiting more often than not.

On a personal level outside of the military, well... "Permission to speak freely, Captain?"

He waved her away. "You know you have blanket permission, Olivia. Don't pull that shit with me."

The use of her given name was pointed, and she knew it. Anderson knew she tended to stay in her shell if left unprompted to do otherwise. Sometimes even despite standing orders that she could always speak her mind. But this was a touchy subject, and they were still technically superior and subordinate, no matter how gray the line was between CO and XO. There was still a line, and she didn’t always like to make assumptions.

“Udina’s a class A asshole. Whatever prejudice he imagines the Council to have because of your presence is bullshit. He doesn’t want you on the case and took the opportunity to execute a political backstab.”

“And now you get to deal with him, so maybe he did me a favor.”

“Alright,” Shepard leaned back in her chair and shook her head as Anderson smiled genuinely at her, “Alright, laugh it up.”

“You’re gonna have to play nice, Shepard. In his sandbox, with his rules.”

“I like my own sandbox, thank you.”

Anderson’s expression grew serious. “As angry as he makes you, let him believe you’re unflappable.”

“I’m sure if I go to say something stupid, Alenko will stop me.”

“Didn’t stop you five minutes ago.”

She shrugged, partially to hide her surprise that the Captain had noticed. Of course he had, though. “May have tempered my words a bit.”

Anderson snorted. “Make sure you let him stop you in the future. That one’s got a solid head on his shoulders.”

“I’ll pretend you didn’t imply I don’t have one.”

“You are an N.”

“Last time I checked, so are you.”

The Captain frowned. “Perhaps I need my own Alenko.”

“I’ll tell you what,” Shepard leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, “You take Alenko and I’ll say all the crazy things. No one will talk too much if the XO is a loose cannon. Plus I already have a reputation as a hardass.”

She’d heard the scuttlebutt on her last few postings and read a few articles written about her by the media. She’d have to have been stupid to not know that some people looked at her with awe, and not the admiring kind. Reporters interpreted her quiet nature as something more sinister simply because she was a marine, and special forces infiltration at that. Marines who worked missions with her but didn’t know her interpreted her compartmentalization as ‘icy’. Stories spread from there, so sure, she was aware. But it didn’t really bother her.

Kassy always thought it should have. Of course, Kassy also thought she was a sweetheart, so...

“You’ve kept your team waiting long enough, Shepard.” Anderson readjusted himself in his chair, sitting up straighter. “You could pay an information broker to locate Detective Vakarian, or you could ask around C-Sec. There’s a C-Sec officer, human, named Harkin, who’s been suspended. Spending most of his time in Chora’s Den - but he keeps his nose deep in the rumor mill. Even off duty and a disgrace, he knows more about what’s going on in C-Sec than most District Captains. He’s not pleasant, though.”

“Hmm,” Shepard grunted. “I’ll take my chances with Officer Sunshine.”

“Okay, collect your team - and maybe stop by the ship and arm yourselves with pistols. This investigation might take you to some unsavory places. I’ll get Udina to make sure you all have retroactive clearance to carry weapons in the Wards. In the meantime-”

“-be discreet, I hear you.”

“Good hunting, Shepard.”

With that, she stood up, saluted the Captain, and left. Alenko and Williams were both leaning against the wall outside. Alenko looked at her questioningly, but she shook her head. Now wasn’t the time for clarification.

“We’re heading back to the Normandy to gear up. Pistols only.”

Alenko fell in step next to her, Williams taking up drag. “Amp?”

She cast a quick glance at his neck. She’d assumed he was already amped, but now saw the seal covering the port instead. “Amp.”

Her stomach growled. Perhaps it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to nab some food on the go, too.


	9. Chapter 9

"You know," Williams slid up next to Alenko in line at a hole-in-the-wall taco stand Shepard had managed to find with surprising skill, "I didn't think Shepard would be so short."

Alenko spared Williams a glance out of the corner of his eye, unsure where the observation had come from. Or rather, why she chose to voice it now. The Chief so far had proven herself to speak her mind, so it might simply have been that. And it was true, both of them towered over Shepard, even when the Commander was in combat boots and they were barefoot.

Alenko was a full foot taller than she was.

Williams continued. "'Cause of the articles and the stories and the rumors… all of it projects a sort of larger-than-life image of the Commander. Plus in those adverts posted on every colony world, there's never anyone standing next to her when they use her face. Just her from Elysium, I think. Never been myself, but the skyline looks like some photos of the major port. And the adverts are usually like twenty feet tall."

"I've never actually seen the adverts," Alenko mused as Shepard completed her order five feet ahead of them and handed her chit to the cashier.

He was secretly grateful for the food stop, as his fuel supply was running low from the long hours in meetings.

Williams slapped him on the arm. "How have you not seen the adverts?"

He shrugged. "Migraines keep me indoors some days."

She harrumphed and mumbled something about him being a giant nerd, too, but he lost his chance at a witty retort when Shepard got her food and he was up next.

He wanted to order half his body weight in tacos and nest down into a table, but Shepard made it clear they'd be eating on the go. Instead he got the mother of all burritos with extra hot sauce to mask the semi-bland taste of processed 'chicken' (when he was told they were out of 'steak') protein, and wrapped it in a napkin once the cashier handed him his food. Shepard's eyes bulged when he joined her in waiting for the Chief with his monstrosity of a burrito.

"You sure you can walk and eat that thing without getting some sort of traffic violation?"

Alenko lowered his burrito far enough to say, "Not everyone has small hands like you, Commander," before taking his first official huge bite.

She stared up at him as she swallowed the last bit of her first taco. "I could eat the burrito and walk."

They ate in silence for a few minutes, Alenko contemplating whether or not his burrito would actually fit in Shepard's hands and Shepard contemplating… well, he didn't know what. Maybe his burrito, maybe the mission. Maybe her tacos.

Williams joined them after a couple of minutes, exclaiming, "Jesus Alenko, that thing's the size of your head!"

"Too big for Shepard's hands," he replied, and Williams snickered.

On his way to take a bite, he completely missed Shepard's hand darting up and swiping the burrito out from his fingers. He stared dumbfoundedly after her as she sped off, with  _his_ burrito in  _her_ hand - and took a  _bite_. Williams trailed after her, laughing every time she glanced back at him as he trotted after them. When he finally caught up to Shepard, he reached over her shoulder and plucked his burrito out of her fingers.

"I'll never doubt your reach again," he muttered as she gave it up.

Alenko scrutinized the small bite she'd taken out of it and seriously considered swiping her taco. The thought, however, must have crossed her mind that that was  _precisely_  what he would do because she practically inhaled her taco with record speed. He frowned at her, then frowned harder when she glanced back up at him, cheeks bulging slightly from the sheer amount of food stuffed between them.

"I hope your bite had extra hot sauce in it."

Shepard only grinned around the food in her mouth for a reply. A disarming grin that made him nearly run into an oncoming civilian  _also_  not looking where she was going, which caused Williams to roll with laughter once more. A soft chuckle that shot straight to his brain and flushed his cheeks. He mumbled something about a double assault and continued eating his burrito in peace. And quickly, as Shepard checked her 'tool which indicated that Chora's Den wasn't too far away. A couple more blocks, tops.

Of course, blocks on the wards were about three times as long as standard earth city blocks.

Even though the Citadel prided itself on being a beacon of civilization and culture, no matter where you went in the galaxy, a certain type of crowd could always be found. The seedy, 'late night' crowd. And that crowd managed to make, from one block to the next, what looked like just any other street from the Citadel feel like a back alley. The lingering stares and quiet corner conversations. The sullen, guarded stares of street vendors and body guards posted outsides shops. The raucous music of varying species pulsing out of clubs that occupied every fifth building.

He tossed the wrapper into the nearest receptacle and wiped his hands on his pants, discreetly checking his holster in the process. The belt holster was a new design he wasn't used to, and it sat a bit funny on his hips. If he had time to tinker, he'd adjust the straps and buckles - but didn't think a fussy show of that sort would be appreciated in a part of the wards where the atmosphere was ever so slightly oppressive.

From the outside, Chora's Den did not look like a club. No steps leading up to it, no blazing lights other than the neon sign spread across the entrance. He could barely even hear the music over the general hum of street noise, which either spoke towards a quieter club or better sound-proofing.

The latter had rather unpleasant implications considering the 'neighborhood' they were in.

There was no bouncer guarding the door.

The music was definitely very loud.

Three mostly naked naked asari were dancing on the stage, in direct line of sight from the door. The similarities between species strong enough that his brain thought he was looking at a blue human female. The differences just apparent enough that he knew he wasn't - aside from the blue skin. For one thing, humans weren't scaly or iridescent - and humans had belly buttons.

"Quite the view," he muttered as Shepard stopped a couple meters in to look around the club. She glanced up at the stage and dismissed it just as quickly at his comment - and that's when he realized he'd said it aloud.

"Uh, Lieutenant?" Williams tapped him on the shoulder. "Put your tongue back in your mouth before you trip on it." She sighed dramatically as she looked up at the stage. "A million light-years from where humanity began and we walk into a bar filled with men drooling over half-naked women shaking their asses on a stage. I can't decide if that's funny or sad."

"How do you know they're not just here for the food?"

Shepard beat Williams to the punch, shouting over her shoulder, "'Cause the music is shit!"

He couldn't argue with that. Joking or not. The music was a bland and generic techno-style thing. Evenly spaced out beats mixed with some non-human instrumentation and electronic rhythms.

"I guess that says a lot about our guy," Williams said. Alenko nodded. It really did.

"This way," Shepard said, and turned right, pushing through the crowd that mostly towered over her. Only the asari mingling were her height, but they were a naturally short species. The tallest one he'd ever encountered barely reached his shoulders, and that was counting the fact that her crest had flared dramatically upwards, the tips curling up above her head. "See anything?"

It took him a moment to realize that Shepard was asking him, as he had better clearance than she did. And while there were krogan and turians mixed into the clientele, there were also plenty of humans, a few drell, and the odd volus breaking up the line of heads.

He craned his head around while Williams did the same next to him, not quite at his height, but a lot closer than the Commander, and with nearly as good clearance. He shifted just as a gap opened up on the far side of the club, and saw an older man sitting at a table nursing a beer. If it wasn't for the man wearing what had looked like, in the brief flash where he was in view, a rumpled C-Sec uniform sans the badge, Alenko would have dismissed him entirely.

He leaned down across Shepard's right shoulder so he wouldn't have to half-yell in order to be heard over the music and said, "Might have spotted him in the far corner."

He indicated the direction with his right hand for emphasis, and Shepard nodded once before making her way through the throng.

If he never went to Chora's Den again, he'd count himself lucky. As it was, the music was starting to grate his nerves. Not to mention the flashing lights that kept threatening to send him over the edge into a full-blown headache if he paid too much attention to them. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose as a disco lighting flashed directly over his face - and crashed right into Shepard as she came to a full stop.

"Woah!" she turned into him as he stumbled and steadied him with a hand on his chest. "You good?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied apologetically as Shepard's hand slipped away.

"The lights?"

"They're a bit much," he said, "but nothing I can't handle."

She frowned up at him with concern before turning back around and heading in the direction he'd indicated earlier.

The crowd was thinner near the rear of the club, perhaps because the view of the dance stage was severely impacted by the multitudes of people. The tables here actually appearing to be set up for private conversation - if one ignored the blaring music. Which wasn't exactly easy. Private dance stages were set up a few select booths, but only half of them occupied.

The man he'd glimpsed earlier was still there, having not moved. His eyes focused blearily on Shepard as she approached his table, and he swayed in his seat before eyeing her up and down. Nearly tipping his bottle over as he looked at her, and Alenko's lips thinned.

Harkin's eyes, despite the gleam of drunkenness, were decidedly predatory.

"Hey there, princess, lookin' fer some fun? 'Cause I gotta say, that uniform looks real good on that bod of yours. Why don't you sit your sweet lil' ass down, have a drink, an' we'll see where this goes," he slurred, leaning back in his seat in an approximation of what Alenko could only guess was an open invitation on where he'd like her to sit.

Williams shifted angrily on her feet next to Alenko, casting a hot glance up at him.

Alenko had every confidence Shepard could handle herself. If he interrupted to shut Harkin down, it would only serve to detract from her command of the situation. Helpful but not helping.

Shepard calmly sat down across from Harkin, twisting the chair so she was sitting in it backwards. "I'd rather chew on a mouthful of razor blades."

The weather is fine today. Nothing really on the news. The nonchalance permeating her words, as if it were just any other conversation, was palpable and agitated the drunken C-Sec officer.

"If you think that'll hurt my feelings, you're in fer a s'prize," Harkin sneered. "Y'know, if more marines looked like you, I might've joined the 'lliance instead."

"Pity."

Shepard didn't say anything else as Harkin studied first her, then him and Williams. Alenko wondered if the drunkenness wasn't actually an over-exaggerated act as his eyes sharpened ever so slightly during the assessment, noting key features of their appearance and undoubtedly filing them away for future use.

Shepard, however, leaned back in the chair and appeared for all the world to simply be sitting, slightly bored, with nothing to do and nothing she wanted to do. He rather doubted that was the case.

"Whad'ya want?" Harkin finally asked.

"Harkin, right?" He nodded, waving his hand. "I'm looking for a C-Sec officer. Garrus Vakarian."

Harkin narrowed his eyes, all pretense at drunkenness abandoned.

Alenko dipped out of the conversation as his instincts told him someone was looking at them. Hairs rising on the back of his neck. Williams had moved closer to Shepard, standing just off her left shoulder, and was glaring daggers at the disgraced officer. Alenko casually turned away from the women and scanned the crowd, flicking his eyes to the stage in order to appear more interested in the sights than he actually was.

No one  _seemed_  to be studying them. A few glances every now and then, but nothing out of the ordinary compared to the types of glances everyone else was getting.

Until he saw the lady, her eyes darting away from his too quick to be coincidence. Carefully not looking back at them even when Alenko appeared to look away from her while still keeping her in his line of sight. After a few moments, she moved through the crowd and disappeared.

Shepard standing up caught his attention before he had a chance to try and get a bead on the lady again. She leaned forward, grasping the edge of the chair with both hands, arms splayed wide, and said, "No, I won't punch you. Wouldn't do anything, anyway, and you'd probably manage to squirrel away in the commotion of bouncers coming to check in." She stared at Harkin hard for a few long seconds. "You know what I hear is unpleasant, though? Being thrown around like a ragdoll. How long do you think it would take those bouncers to subdue Alenko?"

Harkin's eyes slid to him, and for his part, Alenko managed to keep the surprise off his face.

"My bet is it'd be a while. Even if Williams and I did nothing to stop them coming."

Harkin swallowed audibly as his eyes lit back on the Commander - which was lucky considering he'd been unable to stop an eyebrow lifting in surprise.

"So," Shepard continued. "Please tell me where I can find Garrus."

The sweet words were anything but in conjunction with the tone, and Alenko once again got the impression of two different women - the one he'd first met, warm and conversational, if a little awkward, and the Commander persona she slid into with ease to get shit done. Perhaps it wasn't a persona, and simply military efficiency. She had the quiet, lingering stare down to a science. Couple that with the soft words and unflappable stance, and Shepard was not unlike a predator waiting for the perfect moment to strike.

She struck with efficiency and precision.

"Can probably find him at Doctor Michel's Med-clinic.," Harkin quailed and caved beneath the scrutiny. "Still on his investigation even though it's 'officially' over. Pallin authorized his 'early departure' for the day, which was basically code for 'find something'. Everyone knows the Executor's got a stick up his ass about Spectres."

Shepard straightened up. "Thank you."

With that she spun on her heel and departed, Alenko and Williams scooting after her. The chief throwing one last scathing look back at Harkin before he was out of view. "What an ass."

"Very pleasant," Kaidan agreed sarcastically, and Williams snorted.

"I almost wish you  _did_  get to toss him around."

"There's still time."

"I'd really rather not have to bail you out of jail, Alenko," Shepard said as they reached the exit.

"Could just have me transferred to the brig on the ship."

She waved her hand. "Too much paperwork."

"With your reputation, Commander, all you'd have to do is find the right C-Sec officer, and Kaidan'd be out in no time."

"Mmm," Shepard replied noncommittally.

Finally free of the thumping music from the club, Shepard raised her 'tool and moved off to the side of the walkway. "Looks like the Clinic is a fifteen minute walk from here, not too far from C-Sec HQ."

"Bottom of the ring?" Williams asked.

Shepard looked up and nodded.

Alenko took the opportunity presented by the brief reprieve to discreetly rub his temples with an index finger. No migraine coming, but the music hadn't done him any favors in regards to the previous one going completely away.

He could only hope that the next one was far off in the future. At least a few weeks. He didn't get them so often that it affected his performance or kept him ship-side, but he got them often enough that there was a note in his file. Exemptions had been made on his behalf, he was sure, because he was an L2. The Alliance knew they'd messed up, even if they weren't willing to publicly admit it. So the medbay was stocked with super meds, and he got a free pass if his implant sparked another migraine flare up.

He rarely took the free pass.

Shepard poked him but didn't repeat her question from earlier. She  _did_  look up at him with concern, and he simply nodded. He was fine, he really was. Rubbing his temples was just a nice little relief against the last vestiges of pressure that had been agitated by the music. Mostly the bass, thrumming through his core.

The concern was nice, though. It wasn't something he was used to coming from a CO.

He tried not to think of other reasons why he appreciated it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've taken some liberties with alien appearances for Crosshairs. Nothing too drastic, but I always thought it weird that everyone was the same height in game. Asari are going to be a bit more alien in appearance than they are in canon.
> 
> For the interested, I've pegged the asari between (in feet/inches) 4'10 - 5'5, quarians at 5'2 - 5'8, drell at 5'4 - 6'0, salarians at 5'10 - 6'6, turians at 6'5 - 7'5, and krogan at 7'5 - 9'0. There are, of course, exceptions - as there are in humans. Average cis-female human height is 5'7 - 5'9.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I completely spaced last week on uploading (and right before such a good scene, too!). I completed an obstacle race that weekend and was completely wiped afterwards, didn't even turn my computer back on till Tuesday, haha. Back on schedule! Though DragonCon is coming up soon, so it's possible I won't be able to post that week as I'll be running around in cosplay instead!

Getting to the bottom of the ring took longer than fifteen minutes, partially due to foot traffic, but mostly due to an over-exuberant ‘fan’ who’d cornered Shepard and her team near the markets. One screech of ‘Shepard? Commander Shepard?’ and the next thing she knew, an over-bearing, six foot peroxide-blonde kid was in her face - until Alenko gently inserted himself between them and the kid backed off enough to let her breathe and properly look at him.

That was officially two beers she owed Alenko.

 _That_  encounter held them back five minutes as he gushed about her actions on Eden Prime -  _how that_  had gotten out, she didn’t know, but there it was.

Williams appeared torn between amusement and indignation throughout the whole encounter, and Shepard was half-sure the Chief was about to deck the pour civilian.

Shepard didn’t  _mind_  per se Conrad’s exuberance - and she liked that there were civilians out there who tracked the Alliance’s accomplishments. If she got to be a part of the positive, all the better. She did mind that he seemed completely unable to take all the verbal cues in the world, only satisfied once she’d autographed a poor quality quarter-sized replica of Henry.

That had been a surprise. As far as she knew, no toy manufacturers were producing copies of the rifle she’d used during the Blitz. But she didn’t know if it was better if he made it himself or bought it.

Neither option appealed to her. If she had to choose, she’d go for the toy manufacturer. It was a little less ‘zealous’.

When he’d whizzed away after getting the autograph, it’d left Shepard feeling a little dumbfounded, while Williams settled on finding the situation more amusing than anything.

“Is there a Shepard fan club I didn’t know about?” Williams asked once Conrad was out of earshot and Shepard decided that moving forward again was a good idea.

She rolled her shoulders in mild agitation. She  _hoped_  not. That would be  _weird_.

“‘Cause I mean, that guy has got to be President or some shit. You see that gun?”

Shepard assumed Williams nudged Alenko judging from his grunt slightly behind her and to her left. Then he said, “The dimensions were wrong.”

Shepard jerked her head around to look at him, unable to keep the surprise etched off her face.

He smiled shyly. “Williams pulled up a military recruitment poster with you on Elysium. Your rifle was in it.”

She twisted back around, shaking her head. Elysium. She was never gonna be free of Elysium. Not that she regretted doing what she did - not at  _all_. She’d do it all over again, even knowing the consequences, because it was the right thing to do. Every inch of her being could not stand idly by while a colony was assaulted from slavers and mercs. It was a white hot fury that had kept her feet moving that day, that made her face an onslaught of mercs without armor or a shield generator.

She hadn’t been aware that one of the civilians she’d rescued was a reporter for a major news outlet. Nor that, when he decided to tag along, he  _really_  wanted to have the best ‘feature’ about the attack - and had pegged her as his stepping ladder to fame.

She didn’t remember getting to the control tower in the middle of an aerial bombardment - but she didn’t need to. The first image released after everything was over was her running through the docks with shit blowing up around her, cradling her sniper against her chest. In a torn, dirt-stained dress, no less.

Everything had been blowing up around her. That particularly one probably hadn’t been any different. Except for the reporter.

“Shit, look at that!”

Shepard paused and glanced at Alenko, who looked questioningly back at her as Williams veered off to the side towards an opening in the shops and stands. In fact, it looked like a little courtyard at dusk, lit by pink and orange lights. When it was obvious Williams wasn’t gonna turn back even if they didn’t follow, Shepard shrugged at Alenko and they followed her as she made a beeline for the view.

Williams was already leaning against the edge of the wall when they pulled up behind her, splitting up onto either side of her as the Chief had splayed herself along the middle. Shepard leaned up on her tiptoes so she could press herself against the ledge comfortably and enjoy the view.

The ward arms stretched out before them, spread out against the nebula. The buzz of traffic hovering just over the buildings and a variety of ships coming in from the relay. Others heading out.

It was captivating to watch. Almost soothing.

“Big place.”

Shepard slipped back onto her heels while Williams’ approach was much smoother. “That your professional opinion, LT?”

Alenko looked at Williams with such earnestness that Shepard stomped on the witty retort she’d lined up and instead said, “He’s right, Chief. This isn’t just a station. It’s a  _city._ ”

Williams swivelled her head to look at Shepard. “‘City sized’ is a better descriptor than just ‘big’.”

For his part, Alenko seemed to have forgotten the mockery - or perhaps the wonder he was presented with outweighed the laughter - because he said, “There must be millions of people living aboard the Citadel. It can’t be possible to track everyone coming and going.”

“And yet,” Shepard butted in as Williams opened her mouth, “they do. Traffic control must be one hell of a job. Bet the communications are constantly jammed.”

“We should ask Joker about that,” Alenko leaned forward and grinned at her around Williams. “Bet he’s got some good insights.”

“Jesus, you two don’t even  _try_  to hide the geek.”

Shepard propped herself back up against the rail and looked out across the wards. The Citadel was  _huge_. Bigger than anything they had - bigger than anything any of the current races had ever constructed. The Protheans must have been builders, working on this station for decades in order to ensure it would last through millennia.

Whispers stirred in the back of her mind as she thought of the Protheans, and Shepard shook her head to clear the thoughts. She still couldn’t make sense of what she’d seen in the.. vision? Communication? Alenko’s ‘tool suggested it was some sort of communication, but a completely foreign one. After trying to make sense of the data with him sitting across from her offering his own input - not to mention Comm Specialist Chase joining in at one point - she’d thrown up her hands and given up.

“You know,” she mused, partially to override the noise in her mind, “the Council represents more races than I thought. Small wonder they’re careful around newcomers - I would be, too.”

“Yeah,” Alenko agreed, “it must be hard to keep all the different cultures working together, let alone integrate new ones.”

Williams stared straight ahead and said, “Or maybe they just don’t like humans.”

Something in her voice was distasteful, a little too bitter. Shepard didn’t know her personal story, or how she got to those opinions, but she did know Williams had never served shipside before and had never been posted to a station with interspecies contact. The Chief was young, and reminded Shepard a little bit of herself when she was young. Not to mention bitter for her own reasons, holding onto a concept of vengeance long beyond what was healthy, before finally getting over herself.

So instead of a reprimand that would only serve to put distance between her and the Chief, Shepard rotated and leaned sideways against the railing, capturing Williams’ eye, and said, “Why not? We’ve got oceans, beautiful women, this emotion called love. According to the old vids, we’ve got everything they want.”

A romantic notion, sure, but she believed it. It would just take time, as it should.

“Well,” Alenko said as Williams stared at her thoughtfully, “When you put it that way, there’s no reason they wouldn’t like you.”

If Shepard had been walking, she’d have tripped over her own two feet, military training be damned. As it was, she was rooted to the spot in surprise, as if someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over her head - completely unable to fully process what he’d said.

And it seemed he was in the exact same predicament as he stood there with a mixture of shock and ‘oh shit’ plastered all over his face.

She  _should_  remind him of frat regs… but couldn’t bring herself to form the words. More, she didn’t  _want_  to. It was… nice. More than nice.

And highly inappropriate conversational material between the HoMD and the XO.

He tripped over his tongue after a few seconds of awkward silence, attempting to correct himself, cheeks flushed and eyes bright, as he said, “I mean us. Humans. Ma’am.”

And that’s when she realized, after he’d fallen silent once more, rubbing the back of his neck nervously for a few more seconds, that she was still staring at him in a mixture of her own shock and ‘oh shit’.

The Chief nudged Alenko in the ribs. “You don’t get out much, do you LT?”

Williams teasing Alenko shattered Shepard out of her own inaction, her brain finally kicking into gear as Alenko nervously glanced at her before looking away, undoubtedly performing a mental assessment of the damage. Shepard licked her lips as Williams started chuckling at the deepening flush in Alenko’s cheeks, and said, “All right, laugh it up, Chief.”

Williams refocused her laughter on Shepard, eyes bright with mirth. Shepard flicked Williams on the arm lightly before looking at a still embarrassed Alenko. Suddenly unsure what to say as his eyes settled on hers, she simply smiled and pushed off the railing. “Places to be, people. Places to be.”

After a few steps on her own, she heard the clatter of boots rushing to catch up.

“I’ll walk drag, ma’am.”

Alenko fell in step behind and to the left, no more than two feet away, while Williams remained further back, true to her words. Shepard cast a glance over her right shoulder and the Chief flashed her a grin with a thumbs up.

Shepard used the remainder of the walk to the med-clinic to clear her mind. Compartmentalize that situation away, file it for later analysis. There wasn’t time to figure out what it meant, or to evaluate her own reaction. Other than the one observation she already knew, which was that her shock had surprised her. She usually prided herself on being generally self-aware.

By the time they reached the clinic, she was marginally more collected.

The doors opened automatically as they crossed through the overhang to the entrance proper. The first indication that something was amiss was the receptionist out cold on the floor. Alenko was kneeling next to the salarian before the doors had even finished closing, while Williams and Shepard grabbed their sidearms.

Shepard motioned Williams to stand guard at the hallway on the far end of the room and the Chief nodded once before moving into position. Shepard knelt next to Alenko once she was sure the room was secure and had locked the entrance, while he finished examining the salarian and closed his ‘tool.

“He’s not dead, just unconscious. Took a massive blow to the head.”

Shepard nodded once, looking at the salarian. He’d been caught unaware behind the desk, which meant he knew the assailant. No weapon in hand or scrapes to indicate a struggle.

“Nothing we can do for him right now,” Alenko continued. “He’ll live.”

“Let’s move, then. Whoever did this might still be in the building.”

They regrouped with Williams at the far side, and Shepard took point with Williams taking up the rear. Alenko slid along the wall behind her as she deftly moved down the hall, stopping at each doorway for a brief check to make sure the coast was clear before continuing.

All of the private exam rooms were empty, doors open and lights off. She checked the ones on her side of the hall while Alenko cleared the ones on the opposite side. No patients appeared to have been on the premises when whoever had come knocked out the front desk assistant. Or they'd come and gone hours ago.

She was betting on the former, as C-Sec wasn't crawling all over the place. Except for, perhaps, if they were lucky, Detective Vakarian.

Muffled shouting at the end of the hall caught her attention, and Shepard felt Williams pull up right behind her. Radiating readiness.

Alenko expertly and swiftly moved to the end of the hallway, into position at her orders, while she and Williams ran down their side.

Alenko looked to her for orders and she held up a fist, motioning for them to hold position for the moment. There was a row of doors along the T-junction, to either side. Some with lights on, some without. She dismissed the dark rooms, leaving two lit rooms to the left and one to the right - and the shouting had ceased. There wasn't even the sound of commotion or scuffling to tip them off on which direction to go.

Shepard was about to motion for Williams and Alenko to take the left when Alenko caught her attention silently, but urgently. She followed his line of sight after he indicated the direction with a quick nod and spotted someone moving in the shadows, down the hallway on the right. Moving towards the one lit room, just as a shout pierced the air.

Shepard was on her feet in a split second, back hitting the wall on the opposite end of the T-Junction while Alenko moved up to her former position.

The figure in the shadows paused and looked at her for all of half a second before bursting through the door and opening fire. It was the turian - the detective.

Shepard cursed and pursued him, her team hot on her heels as gunfire erupted inside the room. She spared a glance for her team just long enough to make sure they were in position - of course they were, they were a good team, and had proven so on Eden Prime - before rolling through the doorway, quickly assessing her options for cover and where the baddies were.

The Doctor was cowering on the opposite side of the room behind a desk, two dead mercs in front of her. Screaming and holding her head between her legs.

Definitely no Chakwas.

The baddies were out of sight, pushed back by the detective’s initial assault. Shepard dove towards the nearest medical bed and slid alongside it. A thump next to her signaled the arrival of Alenko at her side, while Williams skittered alongside the wall dividing the room ahead of them.

It wasn’t until she was in position and getting ready to size up the room and Alenko asked, “Why do you need Thor’s hammer?” that she realized she’d been muttering under her breath about wishing she had her sniper rifle.

She glanced back at him as he peered over the edge of the bed and threw a merc with a wave of the hand, and he said, “Granted, a hammer of that magnitude might come in handy about now.”

Instead of replying, Shepard grunted and leaned out around the bed and shot a merc straight in the chest as he attempted to move positions to cover the merc Alenko had tossed clear across the room. It only took three hits to blow his shield generator and pierce the armor. Clearly not the best mercs, probably bottom of the totem pole sent out for a shakedown and not expecting any actual resistance.

Less than a minute later, the room was clear. Three marines plus a C-Sec detective against five poorly armored and trained mercs wasn’t exactly fair odds. It certainly made for short work, especially when one of those marines was a biotic and had nailed nearly half the kills himself.

Detective Vakarian brushed past Shepard and Alenko and asked, “Doctor Michel, are you hurt?”

The Doctor shakily stood up from her hiding spot, fingers gripping the edge of the desk as if she wasn’t sure she wanted to expose herself and might dive back under at the slightest sound. “Y-yes, I think… I’m fine. Yes.”

Detective Vakarian nodded as he helped settle the Doctor on her feet and then finally turned to face Shepard. “ Perfect timing, Shepard. You gave me a clear shot at that bastard.”

She stepped towards the Detective, sizing him up. He practically towered above her, even more than Alenko. Most turians did, coming in around seven feet. But she’d had many years of practice of making herself seem larger than she was. It was all in the attitude. “Did I?”

“Without you for backup, I couldn’t have made the shot and survived,” the turian explained excitedly, gesturing at the dead merc at their feet with a perfectly placed headshot right between the eyes. “As soon as I saw you and your team, I didn’t think, I just reacted.”

“Hmm,” Shepard replied, her eyes settling on his sniper rifle. Short range, low powered acceleration, but powerful nonetheless. Either C-Sec hadn’t skimped, or the Detective bought his own gear. Perfect rifle for an indoor job, probably capable of firing off three shots before needing venting.

A good gun with an impulsive, semi-brash owner. But also a good detective, otherwise he wouldn’t be there - and neither would she.

It also wasn’t her job to reprimand him. So instead of informing him that his gung-ho split-second decision made just because he’d seen her team and knew he could pull off a crazy stunt instead of a safer approach was stupid, she said, “You’re still on the case.”

Garrus nodded. “Saren’s a traitor, I  _know_  it. I just need to find the evidence that he’s dirty to prove it.”

Even though Shepard was sure of Saren’s traitorous nature, she wanted to know why  _Garrus_  was. “What makes you so sure you’ll find it?”

Alenko shifted next to her a fraction of an inch. Barely noticeable, but she glanced at him nonetheless just in time to see his left eyebrow raise faintly in mild surprise.

Garrus paced in front of them. “We weren’t granted enough time for a solid investigation. A day to prove a Spectre has committed treason? Laughable, and the Council knew it. He’s one of the most trusted operatives because he gets the job done. But anyone who takes a close look at his record can tell he’s dirty. And the past year? His cases have been more erratic, his actions less justifiable, yet the Council dismisses the body count because of his decades of service.”

It was Shepard’s turn to arch an eyebrow. “Are you sure you should be telling me this?”

“Case is ‘officially closed’, Shepard.” Garrus’ air quotes nearly made her smile despite the situation - two talons rapidly wiggling in the air as the Detective moved them too fast. “Nothing stopping me from idle speculation about a case that’s been put to rest according to the books.”

Shepard did smile at that, but it was a cold smile. “And what does Doctor Michel have to do with this ‘idle speculation’?”

Garrus turned towards the Doctor who was still a bit shaken up over the experience, nervously wiping her hands on her scrubs. She started under the attention of three marines and a C-Sec Detective and licked her lips, eyes flicking between Shepard and Garrus. Guarded. “I know where you can find the quarian.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Sorry this came out so late. I had some personal stuff crop up in the weeks leading up to DragonCon that kept me away from my computer, and last week I was still in Atlanta. This time the schedule should resume as normal, as all the personal life stuff is taken care of and life seems a bit more normal. Apologies for the delay, and thanks to all of you for sticking with me.

"I didn't think we'd be back here so soon," Williams sighed as they followed Shepard back into Chora's Den.

Alenko silently agreed with the sentiment. He wasn't exactly eager to to be greeted with thumping bass and flashing lights again, and not just because of the previous migraine. He hadn't enjoyed his first experience inside Chora's Den, specifically the encounter with one disgraced C-Sec Officer Harkin who he was pretty sure was half-acting a charade rather than being an  _actual_  drunk.

Everything inside the club looked the same. The same bouncer nodded his head at them as they entered the club for the second time within three hours. Whether he recognized them or not didn't show on his face as he noted their sidearms while letting them pass. Some of the stools were even occupied by the same patrons nursing their drinks of choice as they slouched over the counter.

"I'm gonna ask around at the bar," Garrus said - and was off before anyone could reply. Shepard muttered something under her breath, but Alenko didn't catch it over the music. The sentiment, however, was clear. She didn't like the Detective ambling off on his own, but since they were only working  _together_ , she didn't technically have any jurisdiction over his actions.

Judging by the expression on her face, she certainly wished she did.

Alenko kept an eye out for Harkin as they entered the bar proper, but the sneaky rat appeared to have left. Or at least switched tables, as the one he'd been sitting at was now occupied by a grumbling turian waving a bottle in the air. Williams slid up next to him as they entered a more crowded part of the bar and nudged him in the ribs as they passed near a 'private' dance and the dancer eyed first Williams and then him.

"He's got eyes like a shark," Williams said.

Alenko nodded as the dancer attempted to capture his attention, perhaps looking for another client after his current show was done. Securing money in advance. Practical. When Alenko looked away, Shepard was nowhere to be seen.

"Where's the Commander?"

Williams twisted to peer around the immediate area. "Could have sworn she was just here two seconds ago. The woman is  _small_  and moves like a snake." She shaded her eyes against the disco lighting and stepped away from him while he looked in the general direction they'd been walking. "She could be standing five feet away from us and we'd never see her."

He was just about to radio her on the comms when he felt a hand on the small of his back pushing him away from the crowd and towards a booth. He tapped Williams before he was out of range, and peered over his shoulder at Shepard as she guided him towards relative privacy.

"There's a door to some private offices in the back of the club, but it's locked and heavily guarded," she said once they were clear of the main crowd. She waved her hand in the air to capture Garrus' attention, and the turian ambled towards them. Once he'd joined them, she continued. "I can get in through a vent, but it's a one man job. Worse, I overheard two of the guards near the entrance talking: they're on high alert for Alliance marines. Fist must have found out we're looking for him, so I need you two to make yourselves harmless."

"Off duty fraternizing?" he offered.

Shepard nodded. "Think you can pull off a lovebird act, Williams?"

Williams' answering smile was almost predatory. "So long as the LT doesn't expect me to simper."

"I generally prefer adventurous partners, Chief. They tend to not simper."

Williams only smiled wider, with a glint of something he didn't quite recognize - and wasn't sure he wanted to.

"What about me?" Garrus asked. "The guards on this side of the door still need to be dealt with."

"You're the distraction so Alenko and Williams can slip in when I give the mark. Come up with some sort of C-Sec ordinance to get them away from the door."

Garrus nodded thoughtfully - or at least, in a way that indicated thoughtfulness. Alenko had to admit that, despite having known his fair share of turians, he wasn't entirely solid on turian body language and social cues. The few turians he'd been around long-term weren't exactly typical members of the species.

From what he  _did_  know, he could say with some certainty that Garrus was a particularly brash turian. It almost made him seem young, except he carried himself with a confidence that generally came with age and experience. Could also be arrogance, except Garrus didn't strike him as such.

"Flash my badge and come up with mama jumbo on the spot."

Shepard whipped her head back to the turian as Williams choked on her own laugh next to him. "Excuse me?"

For his part, Garrus was confused, focusing first on Williams as she attempted to regain composure and then Shepard, who hadn't stopped looking at the turian incredulously. "As you humans say, 'mama jumbo'...?"

Alenko leaned in towards him and murmured, "Mumbo jumbo."

Garrus' mandibles jittered. "Ah."

"Okay, set the timer Alenko. Five minutes."

Before the last word was completely out of her mouth, Shepard slipped away and disappeared. He tracked her for all of three seconds before the crowd swallowed her whole and then Williams looped her arm around his elbow and drew him away, strategically near the back door to the offices.

The Chief leaned up towards him and said with a sweet smile, "Dates usually look lovingly into their partner's eyes and not at other women."

Alenko complied with her suggestion as best he could, considering the sort of awkward nature of  _attempting_  at affection and becoming hyper aware of how his face shaped itself. "Maybe my date's been touchy all evening and I was enjoying a brief reprieve."

"I tell Shepard you called her a brief reprieve, she'll put a boot up your ass faster than a salarian can blink."

"Or tell you to be more convincing. Drink?"

"You buying?"

"I always buy for my dates, fake or otherwise."

Williams grinned and squeezed his arm before leaning over the bar and grabbing a server's attention. She promptly ordered for the both of them before he could even get a word in edgewise. On a real date, he would have found that aggravating, but considering the enjoyment of said drinks would not actually occur as they were on duty, and any amount of alcohol in their system would be grounds for a report, he shrugged it off and instead slid a hand as low on Williams' waist as he dared. Which wasn't very. Low enough that most people wouldn't say anything. Hopefully.

 _"I'm in through the ventilation staff, but there are guards on this side, too,"_  Shepard's voice whispered into his ear as she opened a comm link to the team. _"I need an extra minute."_

"Copy."

Williams rotated and sat down on the nearest stool. "Only a minute? Shit."

"Missing the action, Chief?"

"I think Shepard's gonna miss the action at that pace. What they hell do they  _teach_  N level snipers?"

Alenko didn't have an answer, and he suspected the question was more rhetorical than anything. Instead, he settled onto the seat next to her and kept an eye on the time, waiting for Shepard's mark. In the meantime, he tried to think of what he would normally do on a first date, and kept coming up blank.

-O-

Shepard deactivated her comm, reassured that her team were on standby, and reassessed the situation beneath her. The vents were cramped and her uniform wasn't conducive to a silent infiltration. Fortunately, the soundproofing was shit and the music masked the scrape of her boots bumping the sides of the ventilation shaft, and the whispering of her fatigues as she pulled herself forward.

The keyword being 'pulled'. There wasn't enough room for her to crawl. An asari would have a hell of a time moving through her silently - which was probably what Fist had intended. Guarding against easy infiltration, but then forgetting something like soundproofing the back offices so that any intruders who so wished to enter by inscrutable means wouldn't be able to do so undetected.

She could take two guards easy, but the element of surprise would have to work in her favor. Neither seemed particularly... capable. Not an insult, just a fact. Lulled into a false sense of security by a locked door manned by another set of guards on the outside. Complacent.

Shepard carefully positioned herself above the intake, noting the placement of the hinges and which direction it was meant to swing (down, with the latch on the outside), and unholstered her pistol. After two deep, calming breaths, she slammed the butt of her gun directly over the latch, swiveled the weapon in her hand, aimed at the closest guard and fired. He was on the floor before his buddy had done more than gape. Shepard grimaced as she fired again, shooting the second guard's hand just as he remembered to reach for his own gun, and he cried out, dropping his weapon with a expletive.

She hooked her off hand on the edge of the shaft and dropped down, keeping her gun leveled at him as she descended.

"Fuck!" he shrank back from her. "Fuck!"

"Silent alarm?" she asked.

The guard cradled his hand to his chest and glared up at her. "Do I look like I can pull a silent alarm, lady?"

He spat on her feet for emphasis.

Shepard calmly stepped towards him and his glared melted away, anger replaced with fear. "Give me your hand."

He hesitated, so she grabbed his arm, ignoring the blood splattering on her uniform, and activated his 'tool. Already connected to the security mainframe, her work was short. He hadn't triggered the silent alarm by an unseen method.

She dropped his hand and he'd just started sighing in relief, expression turning grateful, when she backhanded him hard enough to knock out a man twice his size. He crumpled to the floor instantly, and she used that moment to check on the other guard.

Dead.

His armor had been shit. A decent suit should have deflected a direct hit from a pistol, even at close range.

She stepped over his body and moved towards the door, whipping out her 'tool and unlocking the door with the access she'd given herself through the other guard's omni-tool.

Alenko and Williams quickly stepped through, and Shepard peeked out for Garrus. The detective was still tangled up in his distraction, so she ducked back, shut and locked the door.

Alenko had already moved further down the short hallway and was examining a security monitor while Williams checked on the guards.

"That was barely even thirty seconds extra, Commander." Her voice held a touch of admiration as the Chief glanced up at her. "He's out cold."

"I know," Shepard replied, even though the statement didn't merit an answer. She brushed past the Chief, gesturing for her to follow, and slid up next to the LT. "You want security access?"

"Already have it," he answered - which he did. Impressive, but she wasn't exactly surprised by th is point. "No more guards ahead of us, though it seems as if Fist is particularly paranoid. His office is locked down."

"Do you think he heard your shots?"

Shepard shook her head "Silencing mod."

"Easy fix," Alenko continued. "He may be paranoid, but he didn't do his research. Or his head of security sucks at his job. Door's open."

"Let's move," Shepard ordered. She slipped ahead and Alenko fell in behind her.

No one had anticipated the turret.

Alenko slammed into her as soon as they crossed the threshold into Fist's office, sending them crashing into the floor as gunfire erupted in the room. His barrier flashed around them and she grunted at the impact, her breath knocked out of her lungs in a mix of surprise and another fucking soldier on her. Alenko scrambled to his knees and unceremoniously dragged her under him with one arms as easy as if she were a doll, while Williams provided cover fire. He only released her once they'd squished behind a small metal partition dividing the office part of the room from the bar.

Shepard slithered out from under him as he shifted onto his knees and peered around the edge.

"I thought you'd accessed the security systems," she said. More a statement than a question.

He raised his hand and refreshed his barrier with a smooth gesture. "I did. Turrets weren't registered in the system."

"Fuck," she opened her 'tool and booted up the fab unit. "Any other nasty surprises waiting for us?"

"There were two turrets," he said. "Williams already took one out. Second one has a blast shield."

The tech mine dropped out of her 'tool. No finesse to it, just a blast radius, and she lobbed it over their heads and was pleased when the gunfire immediately ceased upon detonation as she'd guessed all the numbers. The three of them firing at once at close range made short work of the advanced weapons protection, despite the shield.

Once it sparked and shut down for good, a small, quavering voice shouted out from behind the desk, "I surrender, I surrender!"

Shepard was already having a pretty off day. Councilors shitting on her reputation, one Spectre insinuating she was responsible for the death of another Spectre, Udina forcing the Captain off the investigation under the guise of 'plausible deniability'... the day was testing her nerves and her resolve. A few bright spots, with Alenko tripping over his tongue over an of the cuff comment and Williams being a breath of fresh air she hadn't realized she needed. But even those were tempered by the frustrating reality that this investigation was taking them in circles around the relay and she was tired of not finding the answers they needed to get the ball rolling. Every minute they spent squandering their time on the Citadel was one more minute Saren had access to Council grade resources.

It was about time they caught a break.

With that mentality in mind, she stormed out of cover, marched across the room towards a cowering Fist who had his hands up, and aimed her gun at his chest. "Where's the quarian?"

Her team quietly joined her, holding back.

"What quarian?"

Shepard scowled and shot the ground directly in between Fist's legs. "Don't make me ask again."

"Alright, alright!" Shepard lowered her gun just enough to get the man talking - and talk he did. The fake deal he'd set up for the quarian who had information Saren wanted, turning his back on the Shadow Broker - Shepard didn't know enough about the behind-the-scenes information broker to know details, but she  _did_  know that was stupid on his behalf as Saren wasn't the type to offer protection - and the time and location of the meet.

Less than an hour away. And they'd have to hoof it again, heading back towards the access corridors closer to the elevators to the wards proper.

"And what do I do about you?"

"I'm gone," Fist assured her. "You'll never see me again."

Alenko eased up behind her. "With the Shadow Broker after him, he'll never see a moment's peace."

Not a subtle touch of the arm, but that would have been hard considering her gun was raised. The effect was the same. He was giving her a way out if she wanted it.

She did.

Commotion burst out in the hallway just as she lowered her gun and opened her mouth to tell the piece of shit to scram, and the doors opened to reveal a krogan barreling into the room with Garrus hot on his heels, shotgun raised. Shepard grabbed the Chief roughly by her shoulder and shoved Williams behind her with one hand while raising her gun at the krogan with the other, but she was too late. He fired - and Fist dropped dead behind her - just as Alenko hit the krogan with a massive throw that sent the mercenary flying across the room with a roar.

Before the mercenary could rise, the four of them spread out to cover him from all angles.

The krogan grunted as he regained his footing but he didn't reach for any of his weapons. Williams' looked to her questioningly, and Shepard shook her head. She was more worried about Garrus, who wasn't technically under her control. Fortunately, the turian took his direction from her and held fire.

"Who the hell are you?" she asked once the merc was back on his feet.

He met her eyes slowly. Menacingly. "Wrex. And you're the woman who almost completed my job."


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took a while. Most of this chapter had been done for ages, but one part fought me and then life stuff happened which I won't get into, and fanfic dropped off the map of things I cared about taking care of - but I'm back now! Thanks to DAI which reinvigorated my little fanfic heart. The next few chapters of Crosshairs are done now that I've overcome that block, so we should be getting back to something resembling a normal posting schedule again.

"I don't have time to babysit a merc," Shepard stated. The back heel of her boot nudged the tip of his as she continued speaking. A silent order to be ready. He already was. "What's your real interest?"

The krogan stared at Shepard, and Alenko got the distinct impression of a large cat lashing its tail. "You're going after Saren. That's all you need to know, human."

"Bullshit. You want in? Talk. Otherwise don't let the door smack you on the ass on your way out."

Alenko wasn't anywhere near approaching an expert on Commander Shepard's psych profile, but as the day progressed, her temper had taken a turn for the worse. Well, more her capacity for dealing with bullshit had reached its limits. Especially since said bullshit had them running circles around the Wards and even he was beginning to feel like a puppet being jerked about by two-year-old.

The krogan laughed as he considered the Commander. "I was thinking I should come along."

"You're a bounty hunter. What do you get out of going after Saren?"

"There's a storm coming and you and Saren are right in the middle of it. I'm not in this for the money. I want to be where the action is."

"Why me?" Shepard asked. "Why not Saren?"

"I won't bow down to Saren like others of my species. The krogan were a proud people once. Some of us still remember that." The mercenary paced in agitation. "Saren will just use them and toss them aside. And those krogan? They're not  _real krogan_."

At those last words, Wrex closed in fast on Shepard, his face inches from hers. She didn't even flinch.

Alenko, however, had a biotic corona around him in a fraction of second, ready to counter whatever the mercenary did.

The krogan leered down at him over Shepard's shoulder and made a show of smelling the air. "Tell your mate to back off and I'll give you all the intel I have on Saren."

Shepard's hand was on Alenko's chest, holding him back though he hadn't yet taken a step forward. He  _would_  have, if the hand hadn't already been there to stop him. Shepard didn't take her eyes off Wrex as she replied, "Alright, Wrex. You can come with us. For now."

"You didn't call him off."

"You told me to call off 'my mate'. I don't have one."

Wrex's answering laugh was humorless. When he spoke, he pointedly looked at Shepard's hand still on Alenko's chest. "Could have fooled me, human."

"Not to be a stickler for the mission," Garrus interrupted, "But we still need to find the quarian."

Wrex turned to stare at the turian who was still holding position behind the mercenary. Gun out, but not raised.

Shepard used that opportunity to turn and face Alenko with a raised eyebrow - and he realized he was still surrounded by a faint corona of energy. He let it go. In his defense, the krogan  _had_  stepped towards her and scowled as he spat out the words and Alenko wasn't an expert on krogan threat displays, but he did know that one of the first steps in any show of power was to close space between with the enemy. Typically in preparation for a headbutt, but also because their overwhelming size was that much more grandiose and powerful up close. And the krogan knew it.

"The quarian Fist was after? She's not here?"

Garrus stepped closer to Wrex. "She's not. Was she part of your contract, too?"

The krogan sneered. "No."

Shepard stepped between them, shoving them apart none so gently as she moved towards the door. "She is if you want to be involved in this mission."

Instead of following in the Commander's footsteps, Alenko walked behind Wrex while Williams went the other direction and they met up in the middle.

"Stare deep into your new lovers eyes later, Wrex," Shepard called out over her shoulder as she disappeared through the door. "We've got a meeting to crash."

Wrex growled something his translator didn't pick up - and he wasn't sure he wanted it to. But the krogan complied.

Twenty minutes of hoofing across the station found them in another seedy area of the wards where the air smelled particularly stale and recycled, even for a space station.

"Is this the alley?" Williams asked.

The five of them stood in the mouth of possibly the longest, darkest corridor that existed on the Citadel. Narrow as shit with flickering lights interspersed throughout, half of which appeared to be malfunctioning.

"This day officially sucks," Shepard muttered.

Garrus peered around behind them. "Fist only gave us the alley, not  _where_  in the alley, and this one's got a reputation in C-Sec. Runs for nearly a kilometer with only two outlets, if you don't count the shops, and most of them have the back doors barred. I could come in from the other side."

"You know where this lets out?" Shepard asked. She tilted her head up as she asked the question, and Alenko followed her line of sight. Probably checking for snipers or lookouts. Or marking their potential locations.

There weren't many. It looked more like an electrical access corridor than a proper alley. Perfect for people who wanted their deeds to go unnoticed on a station typically under constant scrutiny.

"I do," Wrex answered instead.

"Great," Shepard replied. "You, Garrus, and Williams will enter from there. Keep in radio contact. Williams, you've got the lead."

"Aye, ma'am," Williams saluted. "Lead the way, Wrex."

They left, with only a minor amount of grumbling. Shepard watched them go with a calculating expression while Alenko opened his 'tool to perform a thermal scan. The range didn't extend far, and picked up nothing body shaped. If anybody was inside waiting, they were in deep.

"We've still got about twenty minutes till the meet goes down," Shepard said. "Probably shouldn't hang in the mouth of the entrance in case the mercenaries come this way."

"Wise," Alenko nodded and looked around. "There's an omni-tool shop just over there. We should be able to keep on eye on the mouth of the alley. Unless you want to head in and find a scouting location."

Shepard rotated to face him. "You sure you're not a sniper?"

He chuckled. "No official sniping, but I've done my fair share of stakeouts. Apparently being able to lift targets has its advantages."

"Is that 'lift' with a capital 'L'?"

"Ha, no," he followed Shepard as she moved towards the omni-tool shop, which was looking more and more run down the closer they got. "At least, not officially I guess. Wouldn't capitalize it in the big book of regs or reports."

"I promise I won't hold it against you if you start." Shepard opened the door to the shop and they stepped inside.

Which was precisely when her whole demeanor changed.

Her hands closed on a gadget before he was even through the door. By the time it'd shut behind him, Shepard whirled around and held it up for him to see, eyes expectant. "I love it."

He arched an eyebrow. "Do you even know what it is?"

"Yes." She shoved the object at him which he accepted with minimal grace and examined himself. Having it in his hands offered exactly zero insight as to what it actually  _did_.

"...And?"

Shepard, however, had already moved on further down the bench of junked items, fingers ghosting over every object, lingering on some and dismissing others. She glanced at him as she closed her hand around another… thing.

"It's a really old diagnostic tool for small objects using mass effect technology. Second generation. The tools were clunky till fourth gen."

"Huh," he looked at it again. "And you… love it?"

"I practically survived off one when I was seventeen. Kept food on my table with freelance work."

She set the second thing she'd picked up down as the owner of the place stalked into view and scowled at them.

Alenko held onto the diagnostic tool and took a closer look at it. Sure he was a nerd, but not an engineering nerd. More into software than hardware. He knew some things, but most of his hardware fixes were done with his omni-tool prefab unit. Anything that required more advanced instrumentation was the line at which he typically sought out a professional. Or at least shoved the work off onto another more qualified individual.

He also wasn't sure what to say at the revelation that Shepard was putting food on her own table at the age of seventeen. For such a casual drop, the sentence certainly packed a punch. So he skipped around it. "You enlist when you were eighteen, then?"

"Yup. You?"

"Twenty-two."

Shepard was about to reply when something caught her attention. "Come here."

He complied and she shifted so he could see where she was looking.

"I guess we got the mercs," he observed once the first one of the group stepped inside the mouth of the alley.

All but one of them disappeared. The last one, unassuming in appearance, took up a post near the entrance and leaned against the wall and pulled out a cigarette.

"Shit."

"That complicates things a bit."

Shepard grinned. A cold grin, but her eyes still sparkled.

"Plan?" he asked.

"What makes you think I have one?"

"The giddy expression on your face that says, 'I have a plan and it's going to be fun'."

"You're too perceptive."

"Or maybe you're an open book."

"No one's ever described me as an open book."

"I'll be the first, then," he replied and looked her straight in the eyes. "Shepard, you're an open book."

"Alenko, you're a smartass."

"It's part of the job description for Head of Marine Detail."

"Clearly I need to pay more attention to the fine print when I sign on for these things. You still have the thing."

"What?" Shepard was looking at his hands, where he still held the diagnostic tool she'd shoved at him. "Oh, yeah."

"Explains why the shopkeeper is giving us a dirty look."

He glanced over his shoulder and sure enough, the salarian was frowning at them. Alenko set the diagnostic tool down and the clerk grumbled under his breath, too far away for his translator to pick up the words.

"So, plan," Shepard continued. "We can either take him out as discreetly as possible, which, judging from where we are in the wards, I don't think would be too much of an issue. Or we can give him the slip."

"How would we give him the slip? He's right at the entrance."

"You're definitely not a sniper, I retract my earlier question."

"I'm inspired by your confidence, Commander."

"Surely no more inspired than I am by your sense of humor, Lieutenant. To give him the slip, we'd have to provide a distraction of some sort that wouldn't tip him off."

"No time for that."

Shepard nodded. "No time."

"Take him out then?"

"Yeah."

Alenko looked at the merc again. Still leaning against the wall and smoking a cigarette. "I've got an idea about that."

"Hit me."

"If we get in close enough without arousing suspicion, I could pull at his feet-"

"Capital 'P'?"

"Sure. Pull at his feet just enough to make him stumble. Then we knock him out."

Shepard nodded once, sharply. "Let's go. Take my hand."

She didn't wait for him to comply, instead wrapping her fingers in his as she waved at the shopkeeper with her other hand before tugging him out the door.

Once outside, she strolled as if she didn't have a worry in the world. For his part, Alenko walked a fine line between professional and flirtatious. After all, military could date military barring a few rules: not on the same posting and don't mix E's and O's.*

He also couldn't decide if it was a little… not exactly pathetic, more… telling? that he'd had more fake dates in one day than he'd had real ones in ten months.

"How's your tour going?" he asked.

"Pretty quiet, which is nice," Shepard replied. Her other hand snuck its way up to his elbow and she roped in closer - and altered their trajectory towards the merc standing guard. "You?"

"Couple days leave while the ship goes through some retrofits."

"Fancy retrofits?"

"Rumor has it we might get a coffee machine that doesn't spit out crap."

"Don't believe it till you see it. Same rumor hangs about every boat slated for retrofits."

As they neared the alley, the merc looked up but dismissed them for what they appeared to be - a couple meandering in the wards, talking shop. Which was why when Alenko was within five feet of him, the merc was caught off guard as Alenko pulled at his legs, disguising the gesture by reaching for the Shepard's hand on his elbow. Shepard didn't waste time, not even bothering to release her hands from his as she abruptly rotated and used the momentum twisting back to kick the merc straight in his head as he struggled to regain his footing. He collapsed onto the ground and didn't rise.

"Definitely better than a more explosive distraction," she murmured as she released his grasp, knelt down, and removed the merc's 'tool and tucked it into her pocket. "Let's go."

He followed her into the alley and unholstered his gun after a final check to make sure no one was watching them. He lifted the body of the merc in after them, tucking the merc out of sight just enough to be inconspicuous. Shepard set a brisk pace, yet not so fast that the sound of their boots echoed their arrival.

"Williams, what's your position?"

" _Pretty sure we spotted the quarian slipping in, but she was too far ahead of us to stop her. This alley is fucking long."_

Shepard checked her 'tool, marking Williams's position. "Keep your eyes peeled and don't make a move until I give the mark."

" _Aye, ma'am."_

"I've got a visual," Alenko tapped Shepard on the shoulder and pointed, "Up ahead, near those crates."

She slowed down and kept her finger on her comm. "Williams, we have a bead on the mercs, but no sign of the quarian."

" _No sign of her yet, either. Or your mercs."_

The mercs were too far away for him to hear what they were saying. Even if they had been close enough, the exhaust vents from the various stores lining the alley would have masked the sound of conversation; getting closer wasn't exactly an option. Their current position was best, with a convenient discarded storage crate providing sufficient cover for the both of them. Even if it was a little cramped. The next best hiding position was too close to the merc group, and to get there, they'd risk discovery.

"I knew I should have packed my scope," Shepard muttered as Alenko stood up and peered over the crate, barely able to see over the top. "Or Mjolnir."

The scene hadn't changed. Still no sign of the quarian - which meant Williams wasn't exaggerating about the length of the alley. The mercs  _did_  seem to know which direction the quarian would come from, though, as they'd posted a lookout on the opposite side. A green kid, judging from the nervous way he kept glancing around.

Alenko slid back down next to Shepard and looked at her. She'd mentioned Thor's hammer again, though he was beginning to gather the name might hold a different significance than the one he was thinking of.

Shepard must have felt his eyes on her because she glanced up from her 'tool and said, "My rifle."

"Oh."

"An old friend joked I could wield it like a hammer alongside its standard functionality and the name stuck. Still no sign?"

He shook his head. "No change. Can't hear anything either."

"Same," she replied. "Should have at least brought my scope. Or let you keep it."

"I hear keeping a sniper's scope is considered in poor taste."

"Don't believe everything they tell you about snipers, Alenko. Keep watch, I'm gonna try and make a bug."

Alenko nodded and shifted around Shepard so he could use her superior vantage point nearer the mouth of the alley with the wider angle of view of the playing field. He was just about to lean out when he felt a hand on the side pockets of his fatigues, opening the little snaps and digging around. "Forget your own fab unit materials, Commander?"

Shepard made a noncommittal noise before replying. "Noticed you had some silicone in your package earlier."

He hadn't been aware she'd been keeping stock of the materials her squad carried. "You didn't have any?"

Shepard only grunted in response.

" _Heads up, Commander. Garrus spotted the mercs from his lookout up above. We're not far. Quarian should be entering visual range soon."_

"Copy that, Chief."

Shepard tapped his leg and Alenko pulled himself back into cover. The bug was complete, but instead of switching positions so she could throw it out, she asked, "How good are you at floating delicate objects without smashing them to pieces?"

The ghost of a glass of water flashed in his mind, replaced with accusing eyes brimming with tears. He shrugged the memory away and said, "Fine."

Shepard studied him a moment before slipping the bug into his hands. “I’ll let you know when it’s close enough to pick up what they’re saying.”

Alenko twisted back to peer around the crate and amassed as small amount of energy as he needed, keeping it contained to his hand. A fully glowing blue human wasn't exactly inconspicuous. Even so, he kept his hand behind the crate as he manipulated the field, easing the bug out low to the ground. The concentration required was more than one would think it would be. Flinging was easy, an unleashing of power without much direction beyond 'that way' with 'that much force'.

Shepard tapped his knee, signalling reception and he gently set the bug down. He kept his eyes on the situation, letting Shepard steal his arm and activate his 'tool, patching him in.

The conversation was less than enlightening.

"What do you see?" she asked.

He shook his head. "Nothing. They're holding position. Not even scouting the perimeter."

"Confident."

"Hopefully overly- wait, the quarian just arrived."

Shepard crowded in behind him so they were effectively sharing the same cover spot, peering just below his head.

The mercs had gone silent as soon as the quarian emerged.

The quarian maintained a position near the edge of the mercs, even as they tried to close around her.  _"Where's the Shadow Broker? Where's Fist?"_

Alenko maintained a low hum of biotic energy, while Shepard readied her gun.

" _We're in sight, Commander,"_  Williams said.  _"Ready on your mark."_

Alenko kept his eyes the two mercs closest to the quarian. When shit went down, they'd be the first to make a move against her.

He'd missed the mercenary's reply, but judging from the way the quarian started backing away from the group, one hand reaching towards a pocket on her suit, it wasn't a reply in her favor.

"Get ready to move," Shepard's voice whispered next to him and in his ear.

They didn't have long to wait. One of the mercs attempted to grab the quarian's arm and in the space of a heartbeat, a sabotage grenade went off and the quarian back-flipped out in the confusion. Alenko hadn't even seen the quarian throw the damned thing.

He didn't take time to consider the feat as the mercs opened fire, one of them shouting that the contract called for the quarian alive or dead, it didn't matter which. Shepard moved out right behind him and he flipped up a frontal barrier as bullets headed their way, holding it up with his forearm as if it were an actual shield. An unnecessary mnemonic, but one that helped him formulate the concept in his mind.

The fire didn't last long as the guns overheated from the sabotage, weapon sensors misfiring and assuming the sinks were over-charged when they weren't. Shepard whipped around his barrier as soon as the gunfire ceased and shot the closest two mercs, dropping them just as Williams and Wrex entered from the opposite side.

The mercs hadn't counted on being boxed in, and that made them desperate.

Alenko pulled the feet out of two preparing to charge Williams as the Chief backhanded one he hadn't seen earlier, while Wrex bulldozed straight into the middle and sent another merc flying against the wall. His head hit hard enough to audibly crack the helmet.

The fight was over quick. The mercs had only banked on trapping a lone quarian, not encountering three marines, a pissed off krogan, and a C-Sec detective. Minimal resistance anticipated had left them unprepared. Over confident.

Shepard holstered her gun as she approached the quarian who, despite the faceplate blocking out any indication of facial expressions, gave off the distinct impression of eyeing each of them in turn.

"My name is Commander Olivia Shepard," Shepard said, coming to a rest about a meter away from the quarian. "We're with the Alliance, not Fist."

Alenko took up a resting position just off Shepard's flank.

Wrex ambled over to another merc on the ground and pushed the body over with his foot and said, "Came to stop his shit plan."

Williams joined Alenko behind Shepard, flanking her other side, while Garrus moved to stand next to Williams. The Chief glanced at the turian but said nothing.

"Thank you for saving my life," the quarian said. She shifted on her feet and her gun hand twitched. "But why are you here?"

"Investigating Saren," Shepard answered.

The quarian was silent for a moment. "Then I have a chance to repay you, but not here. More mercenaries could be coming."

"Might be a situation better suited to the Ambassador's office," Alenko said.

Shepard glanced back at him. "I agree. Better not waste anymore time."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I put an * in the previous chapter after "E's and O's" but then never added the footnote, so here it is:
> 
> * E's and O's: enlisted and officers

There was a joke in the current situation, if Shepard could find it. Something about a krogan, a turian, and a quarian in the human embassy… a couple Alliance marines… She was too tired to think of it, but she was sure there was  _something_. Even if it did boil down to ‘who would walk out of the room alive?’

Who  _would_  walk out of the room alive?

She discreetly glanced around as Udina yammered on about ‘shooting up the wards’, ever more purple in the face because she’d crowded his office with ‘half the Citadel’.  _He_  certainly wouldn’t survive. Probably be the first one hit, judging by half the expressions plastered on faces, ranging from irritated to glazed.

The quarian kid would probably be the next to eat it, which was kind of sad because she seemed pretty sweet. Good with an omni-tool, too. She had survived quite a rough situation with Fist though, so she might last longer than anticipated. But in the end, she wouldn’t be the one to walk out if only one could.

Alenko could take the krogan, she was sure. Especially if Williams attacked from the other side. Shepard had the turian in the bag. But Anderson… that was a tough one. N against N? They knew how each other fought, so it was a hard guess. She  _had_  kicked his ass the last couple of times they’d practiced together, so he was probably out.

Shepard would  _definitely_  take Williams out if Alenko didn’t beat her to the punch.

Which left Alenko.

He was a dangerous one, and not just because he was a biotic. He was  _disarming_. She narrowed her eyes at him. Could she take a biotic with just a pistol? Sure Wrex was a biotic, but she’d noticed him squinting his eyes in the brightly lit areas. And Wrex would gun for Alenko after the incident at Chora’s Den, which would ultimately sound his downfall.

Alenko shifted on his feet and his eyes slid to hers, pupils dilating under her scrutiny. It was like an electric overload hitting her gut as she realized she’d been absentmindedly staring at him while considering her question and she quickly looked away.

She could probably take him, though it might cost her.

Udina halted his pacing in front of her. “What are your thoughts, Commander?”

Shit.

She scraped her brain for any tidbits of conversation that might have slipped through as Udina stared down at her. The quarian… Tali had captured intel on her omni-tool… something about the Council and enough evidence… There was some technical talk about how Tali had managed to save the data, but Shepard honestly hadn’t been paying enough attention to know more than that. She probably  _should_  have been. Judging by Udina’s expectant expression, though, it seemed likely he was probably asking her if she thought this was enough evidence to call a second meeting with the Council. “We should listen to the file before making any decisions.”

Udina nodded. “Yes, yes, we don’t want to be  _rash_.” He looked up sharply at Tali who jumped. “If you would be so kind, Miss Zorah, as to play the file for us.”

Udina may not have noticed the split second where the quarian stared at him, but Shepard did. Something he’d said had given her offense, though it was admittedly hard to put any specifics to the split-second silent treatment without being able to read facial expressions. She still had body language, and Tali’s body language had gone silent abruptly at being addressed as ‘Miss Zorah’. Shepard made a note to not do that herself.

The contents of the file were a direct hit.  _“Eden Prime was a major victory! The beacon has brought us one step closer to finding the Conduit.”_

Anderson stepped forward excitedly, talking over the second half. “That’s Saren’s voice. This proves he was involved in the attack!”

Udina cut him a scathing look that rolled off the Captain like a bead of water on a ball. “Could you replay that last section, please. I didn’t hear it.”

Tali complied, and the audio completed with someone else, an asari judging by the ever so slight resonance to the voice, saying,  _“And one step closer to the return of the Reapers.”_

Reapers.

Shepard’s head spun and she took a step back, brow furrowing. Williams looked at her with concern when Shepard bumped into her, but didn’t say anything.

She felt like she should know that word. Her mind buzzed and whispered as strange… shapes coalesced, but the meaning wasn’t clear. Giant insects the size of buildings. Or squids? Something with tentacles, maybe, except they burned red with fire and heat. The images were unfocused and alien and her brain short-circuited attempting to form the right words and the buzzing grew louder as she tried to make sense of it.

Her temples pulsed with the threat of a sudden headache. Shepard stabbed her thumbs into the sides of her head as Williams said, “Ma’am?”

Someone put a hand on her shoulder in concern, one of the marines, but she couldn’t tell which one as the whispering grew more agitated and her temples burned. It was like her brain had kicked into overdrive, trying to decipher something it didn’t have the key to, but the information was  _there_. It shouldn’t  _need_  the key. “I feel like… I’ve heard that name before. Reapers.”

The hand slipped away as she raised her head and lowered her own fingers away from her head.

Saying the name aloud had lessened the susurration. The burning abated to a mild blaze instead of a raging inferno.

The beacon was officially the third worst thing that had ever happened to her.

“Like a vision?” Shepard didn’t see the ambassador’s face, but she heard the sneer in his voice. “That’s hearsay at best and a bad dream at worst. I will not base our testimony against Saren off of your nightmares, Commander.”

Shepard felt her face go red with anger, but before she’d even had a chance to open her mouth, Anderson said, “Regardless of the contents of the beacon, the file proves Saren was working with the geth. And regardless of whether or not the Reapers are real, the Geth seem to  _believe_  they are and Saren is using that to his advantage to find the Conduit. Considering the actions he’s taken so far, my guess is the Conduit isn’t good.”

“Not to mention an unprovoked attack against a human colony to further his goals,” Alenko added.

Shepard kept her mouth closed. She didn’t trust herself to speak. Let Alenko do the talking. If she could have excused herself, she would have. But aside from the fact that Udina would protest her disappearance, it would also give Anderson cause for concern and she didn’t relish the idea of a heart to heart so soon after their first one. Or at all.

Fortunately Alenko was keen on speaking his mind, undoubtedly bolstered by her silence indicating tacit permission for him to take the reigns. “Whatever the Council thinks of the Commander’s vision, they won’t be able to deny Saren’s attack on Eden Prime. Not with the audio file Tali recovered from the geth memory core. If they insist on bringing the beacon into play as evidence, the best we can say is that Saren wanted it destroyed for a reason. That reason probably relates to the Conduit. Whatever it is, the fact that Saren and, by extension, the geth are looking for it is enough reason to not want them to get it. Claim PTSD induced nightmares if you must to save face, Ambassador, but we all know there’s more to it than that.”

A stunned silence settled over the room as Udina stared at Alenko. The Lieutenant didn’t back down.

Anderson was the first to step forward. “Well said, Lieutenant.” Shepard didn’t miss the pointed glance Anderson gave her as he stepped around Udina. “Ambassador, I think we have enough to call a meeting with the Council. The sooner we get Saren disbarred, the better.”

Udina finally tore his eyes away from Alenko and marched across the room towards his terminal. “We just might be able to turn this whole fiasco in our favor.”

-O-

Shepard stared at her reflection in the side of the now empty glass in her lonely little corner of the Ambassador’s Lounge.

Spectre Olivia Juliette Shepard, Lieutenant-Commander in the Systems Alliance Navy and Hero of Elysium. It was a bit much to swallow, and not how she’d anticipated this day's events to go.

She felt more like a puppet than a real Spectre. The title without any of the legal leeway that supposedly came with the job. She had no illusions about why she’d been given the rank. The Council needed to mop up their mess, and who better than someone who’d already been slated for track and had firsthand knowledge of the shitpile? She wasn’t a real Spectre, not really.

But she wasn’t going to let that stop her from doing the job.

Hopefully some of the crew would move with her, onto whatever ship Udina and Anderson could get. Something small and fast. She knew of a couple vessels, some that had been decommissioned. It’d been years since she’d set foot on the SSV Cold Harbor, but that boat was still floating around the galaxy and would serve her purposes. A good old sniping squad boat.

Speaking of her sniping squad days, she opened her ‘tool and shot off a message to Kassy:  _Guess who’s a big damn Spectre now? Yours truly._

She closed her ‘tool and resumed staring at the glass. It offered no insights to her current predicament, aside from whatever she saw in her expression mirrored back at herself. Shepard  _liked_  the Normandy, the crew. Her post. It was an unconventional layout, but one that flowed surprisingly well. Humanity had a thing or two to learn from the turians, and the Normandy’s unconventional command deck was proof of that. She hadn’t stood behind the galaxy map herself, but she’d seen Anderson there, There was no doubt that whoever stood there was in command, and the rear position afforded a better tactical view.

It also reminded her of command bridges from Star Trek to an extent, but that was beside the point.

She knew it was a bit ridiculous, as total post time clocked in at eight days, but she’d grown fond of her crew. Perhaps it was the smaller nature of the team which inherently meant more intimate interactions. Hitting dirt with the same people, eating with the same people, and sleeping next to the same people day in and day out.

There was also no denying that she clicked with certain members of her crew, probably more than she should.

Certain  _member_  more like. It was… confusing. She wasn’t one for opening her heart up, not since Elysium. And maybe that wasn’t healthy, and maybe it wasn’t the right way to go about handling herself, but it’s what she did and it’s what worked. She functioned.

Kassy would have a field day with this news.

She’d also tell her ‘just functioning’ wasn’t enough.

Shepard pushed the glass away and rolled her shoulders, resisting the urge to cross her arms. She felt  _defensive_  and she hadn’t even  _told_  Kassy about it. She didn’t know if she wanted to. After all, she shouldn’t even be thinking it, and the fact that she had and  _was_  made her a piss-poor XO. Probably good she wouldn’t be his XO for much longer, considering what Udina was cooking up.

That thought gave her pause.

No, everyone who ever got close to her died - she’d just be signing his death warrant. She had her exception already: Kassy. The one person she loved who hadn’t caught the express ride to an early grave. Sometimes Shepard felt it was only a matter of time before even that was taken away from her.

She  _was_  better off alone, because it kept other people safe from her curse.

Losing Kelila taught her that.

She jumped as someone slammed a glass down right in front of her. “Drink up, Commander.” Williams grinned before tossing back her own drink, then said, “Congratulations on becoming the first human Spectre, Skipper.”

Shepard fingered the rim of the glass before picking it up. “Skipper?”

Williams shrugged as Shepard knocked it back. “You’re too friendly for ‘Commander’ when we’re off duty.”

“Huh,” Shepard replied. “What about just ‘Shepard’?”

Williams shrugged and Shepard let the matter lie. No one had given her a nickname in over a decade, for no other reason than to do it. It brightened her mood a little, easing some of the gloom that just kept manifesting as the day progressed.

“You alright?”

Shepard eyed the other woman as she sat down on the stool next to her and signalled for another drink. “I’ve got a bullseye on my forehead.”

Williams grinned again. “Fortunately, I think only politicians can see it.”

“Is that really a plus?” Shepard wondered.

“They don’t have military training. Most of them. Well, Councilor Sparatus might, but he’ll be too busy air-quoting you to actually shoot you.”

Shepard snorted. “Where’s the rest of the team?”

“The aliens had their own business to take care of, except for Tali. She headed to the Normandy until we know what’s what. Alenko muttered something about catching the end of some proceedings and took off as soon as Anderson dismissed us.”

Shepard frowned. Court proceedings? She wasn’t aware of any Alliance proceedings on the station, but she didn’t exactly keep up on such matters, either. Perhaps an academic interest, though if anyone asked her, Alenko and judicial proceedings weren’t two things she’d pair together without a good reason.

“I sent him a message to drop by if he had time, but no response yet,” Williams continued.

“Guess he’s gonna miss out on the two beers I owe him, then.”

Williams laughed.

She wondered when she’d have time to actually  _pay_  him those two beers, if her movement saw her with a new team. She wanted to start the mission as soon as possible, but Anderson would insist on a send off. Earliest she’d leave would be tomorrow.

“Permission to speak off the record, ma’am?” Shepard shook herself out of her thoughts and nodded. “Since it sounds like you’ll get pulled from the Normandy, I’d like to request a transfer to go with you. Eden Prime may not have been my home, but it was my station. I lost my whole unit to the geth. I want to see that traitorous bastard pay.”

Shepard considered the other woman. Her expression was fierce, determined. She exuded confidence, but underneath that, Williams was steeling herself against denial. As if she expected the rejection out of hand, yet wouldn’t let that stop her. A woman who wasn’t afraid to ask for what she wanted.

“Alright.”

Williams stared at her, as if she couldn’t believe what she’d just heard. “Just like that?”

“You asked, and this mission is gonna need people who are committed. More importantly, people I can trust.” Shepard let that sink in, then added, “Yes, just like that.”

Williams looked down at the counter. “Thank you.”

“Why?” The word was out of Shepard’s mouth before she could stop it. Not that she wasn’t curious about why Williams appeared to believe she’d have been rejected out of hand, because she was.

The Chief raised her head defiantly, eyes bright. “Because I’m a Williams. My grandfather was  _the_ General Williams, the man who surrendered Shanxi to the turians in the First Contact War. The first human to ever surrender to an alien. Because my dad never made it above Serviceman third class, and every time I put in a request to transfer to a shipboard posting, I’m denied. Without explanation. Just a big, fat ‘Request Denied’ stamped at the top. Because despite qualifying for the Academy, I still haven’t been officially accepted.”

The Chief blew out a breath and if Shepard didn’t know better, she’d say the woman was trying hard to keep herself from shaking in anger.

She’d expected something relating to insecurities and self-worth. Perceived failures. Not this.

She really should have read Williams’s file.

But she could understand the Chief’s anger. The years of built up resentment at being punished for her grandfather’s actions. An action the Alliance never outright said made them look weak, but which was heavily implied.

Except military history was clear on one fact: the people of Shanxi would have died had General Williams not surrendered. The turians waged total war and civilians were dying from bomb drops left and right, with no end in sight. Alliance support would never have come in time to prevent total colony loss.

Yet with all of that in mind, it didn’t surprise her in the least the Alliance held an unofficial grudge against the family name.

Shepard disliked prejudice built into the system, keeping people who deserved to shine from doing so while elevating others who didn’t - all for superficial reasons. It was one thing she worked hard against in her off hours, her peer reviews, and within her own work in the military. Putting space brats in their place when they thought having admirals for parents meant they could get away with shit any other FNG would be penalized for. Giving everyone a fair chance at proving themselves.

Her reputation of ‘ice for veins’ hadn’t exactly come out of nowhere. People just rarely took the time to examine the context.

If Williams could shake the negative perceptions clouding her judgment of nonhuman races, she’d go far in her career. And Shepard would do her damnedest to ensure she got there.

She waved the bartender down to order another round. “This one’s on me.”


	14. Chapter 14

Alenko lined up with the everyone else waiting to leave. His blood had settled just below the boiling point of bitter anger, and he was having a hard time keeping years of pent up frustration off his face. At least he wasn't the only one. Some of the other people around him appeared to be having the same problem. He took a small amount of solace in that. The discussions that had happened today didn't affect just him, and not just L2s.

He thought he'd recognized some of the people who'd attended as well, though he couldn't recall their names. For all of BAaT being an enclosing educational system, there were enough kids that not everyone knew everyone.

A lot of L2s had joined the military same as him, because of the benefits and only moderate levels of discrimination compared to everywhere else. Though those weren't necessarily his reasons, they didn't hurt.

A cynical part of him wondered if the people responsible for setting up the proceedings hadn't orchestrated it such that more L2s wouldn't be able to attend than didn't want to believe in that level of malice on behalf of the Alliance, not anymore. Even negligence felt over much. But it wasn't the Alliance handling the reparations proceedings. And a lot of names called for testimony had gone unanswered. He could see in the faces of the officials that they thought that meant those L2s didn't care enough about the outcome to attend. After all, they'd all been notified.

The truth was that whoever arranged the proceedings probably hadn't even brought that into consideration. He'd only been sent a courtesy email five days prior, which would only be enough time to request leave in the rarest of circumstances. Anyone on mission deep in the traverse was screwed. The fact that he'd been assigned to a boat operating under a Council sanctioned mission, which required reporting to the Citadel, was the only point that had worked in his favor. If he'd still been aboard the Tacoma, the best he could have done was watch the stream after the fact.

Alenko's attempts to not scowl failed. He bumped into one of the court secretaries on his way through the human assembly hall and she squeaked an apology and ran off after one look at his face. He counted the seconds for each breath as he waited for the elevator, but it did nothing for his mood. Too worked up for a simple breathing exercise to shake the temper. A quick check of the time showed he still had four hours before he was due back at the ship- time enough to cool down, hopefully. Or find something to do to work through the frustration.

At the very least find someplace where he could cool his heels without snapping unduly at anyone. He didn't want the team to see him like that, and not just as a matter of pride. It was a point of respect for them. L2 reparation proceedings always left him in a foul mood, with an even fouler taste in his mouth.

He slipped into the elevator that would take him back to the presidium commons once the doors opened, and activated his 'tool. A couple messages from Williams, the first inviting him to celebratory drinks with the Commander who, the message informed him, Williams was about to ambush. The idea of Williams ambushing Shepard was enough to bring a temporary smile to his face. The next two messages counted down the time left, one of them informing him the two beers Shepard apparently owed him would be forfeit if he didn't get his ass down there soon. The last one simply read:  _forfeit_.

Feeling a little guilty, he sent Williams an apology, then closed his 'tool.

There was that to consider, too. He'd never served on a boat where the XO had been transferred out within a week of being assigned to it. But the circumstances surrounding Shepard's pending transfer were unique. No human had been made Spectre before and, while she was now a Spectre, Shepard was still an Alliance marine. Yet she couldn't be seen to take orders from someone above her on her boat, so while the transfer was still up in the air as to whether or not it would happen, it was the scenario Alenko envisioned as most likely.

Which was a shame, because he liked working with her on the ground. Few COs caught onto his capabilities as fast as she had, and fewer still made him feel perfectly at ease. Oh Shepard hadn't busted out a welcome banner and patted him on the ass or anything like that. It was all in the  _how_. She was a woman who exuded acceptance, perhaps because she'd been through so much.

There were also... other factors at play, but he still sorting through those. The mitigating factors made it hard for him to decide which outcome he desired more. It was… confusing.

He still had a bad mood to rid himself of, but was unsure where to go or what to do, and ruminating over his options almost made him miss getting off the elevator. He jumped through the doors just as they were about to close - and ran smack right into someone in the process.

"Shit, sorry," he apologized, reaching out to steady his victim - and realized it was Shepard. Of all the... of course his luck was just that bad.

"I thought we weren't gonna make a habit of tripping me," she grumbled, but the words didn't hold any real bite. When she met his eyes, her expression visibly softened and she halted disentangling herself from him. "You alright?"

He considered the question, then considered her. She was a logical woman who knew he was an L2. She was also more compassionate than her reputation suggested, but that wasn't terribly surprising. Yet Alenko preferred keeping his personal life separate from the military. Didn't want his superior officers believing he'd muddy the waters with his personal affairs or let his status as an L2 define him. It didn't.

But then... she'd asked. And there were those  _mitigating factors_.

So after a lengthy pause, he said, "No."

"I didn't think so, come on." She tapped him on the shoulder before heading off. "Thought I'd get a peek at the Spectre exclusive gun range, maybe check out the 'rare stocks'. Apparently I get a steep discount on my first gun."

"Ah," he said as he jogged up next to her. "You don't mind poor company?"

She glanced at him, then said, "Maybe I'm not completely alright either."

Misery loves company.

They walked in silence for a while, Shepard leading the way. Neither having lied about their foul moods, though he had to admit that being a grump with someone else was better than being a grump on his own. And now he didn't have to figure out what to do with his time.

"So if you don't mind me asking, what's your story?" Shepard asked.

Alenko glanced at her as they cut through a small garden. "L2 reparations proceedings."

Shepard grunted, but it was an amicable, understanding grunt. One that neither prompted him to speak more if he didn't want to or made him feel judged in any negative capacity. Most people upon hearing anything about L2 reparations would rather ignore the issue altogether. It was... nice that Shepard seemed to recognize that it was a sensitive issue.

"Doesn't seem to be going in our favor," he continued.

"All the more reason to shoot things," she replied.

He chuckled. Couldn't argue with that.

Shepard slowed as they trotted up a set of stairs and rounded a corner, and entered the turian embassy. She held out her hand towards a security panel next to a door, then leaned forwards and spoke into another panel that activated as soon as her handprint was accepted. "Olivia J. Shepard."

The door opened, and Alenko followed her inside to the Spectre Office. Curiosity overrode the last vestiges of general grumpiness hanging about his head as they entered the building proper. The layout was stark and functional, but no less impressive for it.

A Keeper ambled away from them.

"What about you?" he asked.

Shepard led them towards the armory and was silent just long enough to make him second guess asking the question in the first place. But when they reached the gun locker and she removed a pistol, she said, "I had a run in with a reporter who insisted on bringing up every damned person I've ever loved, all of whom are dead, as part of some sick tribute of 'wouldn't they be proud?' and 'what do you think they'd say now?' to my being humanity's first Spectre."

"Shit."

He wasn't sure what else to say, but Shepard wasn't done. She set the gun down and looked across at him from the bench. "Udina also talked Anderson into stepping down as CO of the Normandy."

"Well," he breathed, and selected a gun of his own, "all the more reason to shoot things."

Shepard smiled.

And Alenko had his first honest insight into why Shepard was the way she was.

-O-

They spent an hour in the upper gun range. First selecting their own weapons to test out, and with the rare stocks added to the arsenal, there certainly was no shortage of guns Alenko had never placed his hands on before. Including some that were currently only available to Spectres as part of a testing program. After that, they'd engaged in a friendly targeting competition with handguns which Shepard won four out of five times. Not that he did poorly, she was just a better marksman and hit closer to the center of the target than he did.

Her headshots were always right between the eyes.

All shots by bot h parties were still kill shots.

After another bout of solo target practice where Alenko fell in love with a prototype Carnifex that was still in the testing phase, Shepard invaded his booth and tapped him on the shoulder, holding the biggest sniper rifle he'd ever seen. Or perhaps it only looked big because she was so small. A fact he'd never admit to her face.

Instead, he asked, "Is the range even big enough for you to shoot that?"

He barely stopped himself from adding, 'are you?' afterwards.

"Not this one, but the lower level one is."

Which was how he found himself wearing thick earmuffs in the sniping gallery on the lowest level, the target as far away as the presidium ring was wide. "It's been about ten years since I last held a sniper rifle, let alone shoot one."

Why that made Shepard grin, he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

"You still remember the basics, right? Point and shoot?"

"Yeah, I think I can manage that much, Shepard." He took the rifle she was holding out for him. The same one she'd invaded his booth with not ten minutes earlier. "This one of yours, or a new one?"

Her hand lingered on the gun for a bit before she finally released it. "Pretty sure I'm gonna get it. Short range was good up above but I gotta see how it handles mid-range before I fully commit."

'Hahne Kedar' was etched into the haft. Beneath that, 'X'. Model iteration, probably. "Solid."

"Baseline specs are already better than Mjolnir, but I've encountered my fair share of guns that were supposed to be better and weren't. Handled well up above, though, so I'm tentatively optimistic. Already compiling a list of mods that would get the most out of her."

Alenko pulled the gun up, muscles struggling to remember something he'd never committed to memory in the first place. The instructions slowly came back to him, but he was sure every movement was cross-examined by Shepard, with at least ten actions categorized as 'wrong'.

"How bad's my form?" he closed an eye and peered through the scope.

Shepard took that as tacit permission to correct him. Two hands found his waist and repositioned his stance while a boot nudged his left foot. Then she readjusted his arms and corrected how he was holding the rifle, not just with his hands but against his body. Her fingers were warm. Rough from callouses, but the touch was gentle. "Keep both eyes open," she said as she finished.

He opened the one he'd closed so he could peer through the scope. "Not gonna pry it open?"

"Unless you want me climbing you like a tree, no."

He looked at her standing just off to the side in front of him. She barely reached his shoulders, but she was still tall enough to boop his forehead if she reached. "You're not that short, Shepard."

She poked his arm. "No, but this is in my way. Are you gonna shoot or just stand there and look pretty?"

"Don't let the gun deceive you," he joked. Alenko had seen the way she'd been looking at the rifle. Snipers were the only people he'd encountered who named their weapons and treated it sacred.

"Oh I'm not," she said - and then quickly backed out of range so he could take the shot.

Which was convenient, as her hasty retreat prevented her from seeing the heat rise in his cheeks. There were those mitigating factors again, except the point was moot because the decision had already been made. So, well, shit.

He sighted the target, keeping both eyes open as Shepard had instructed, aimed, then fired.

"Sonofa _bitch!_ " He turned around to goggle at Shepard - and then the gun. It packed a  _punch_.

Logically he'd expected the kickback; mentally, he'd  _thought_  he'd prepared for it. But that decade of not touching a rifle had worked against him. He couldn't entirely help the boyish grin that spread across his face as he marveled at the gun.

The most he dealt with was an assault rifle, though he still preferred the heavy pistol. He hadn't found an assault rifle that worked with his biotics and tech as well as he'd like. While a sniper rifle was completely impractical, there was no denying the funness he'd just experienced. The raw power of firing a shot at such a range and having it hit home. Gorgeous.

Shepard trotted up to the short-range telescope to view the target. "Not bad," she mumbled. "How was it?"

He offered her the rifle as he said, "If I wasn't a biotic, I might've been convinced to give up the allure that is full engineer in favor of infiltration. Why don't you try?"

Shepard shook her head, rubbed her shoulder, then resumed looking through the telescope. "No armor to deaden the kickback, and this wallop of a bruise is ready to rip my arm off from practicing short-range up above."

"Are you saying you used me as your test dummy?"

She peered over her shoulder at him. "Maybe."

He looked back at the rifle. "Well, the kickback was pretty strong, but I'm not a sniper. So. Take that with a grain of salt. I aimed for a body shot, right between the breasts-"

"-nailed it."

"-and I didn't feel any pull to either side, so the stabilizer module seems pretty solid." He contemplated the scope attached to the gun. "I didn't like the targeting interface, but you've got your own attachment, so that's a wash. "

Shepard had rotated to face him as he gave her the best review he could for having only fired the single shot and not fulfilling the requirements of a sniper specialist. Head tilted to the side as she listened. "Wait till I modify it with an overpowered heat sink."

He walked over to the bench and set the rifle down. "Does that mean you're gonna get it?"

Shepard joined him and started dismantling the weapon. "I think so. It's solid, reliable feeling. Got a bit of a temper. Casing feels like it could take a beating, which is a huge bonus. You wouldn't believe how fragile some sniper rifles are. Almost like the manufacturers think we just sit up in trees and rest all goddamned day. No, I like a rifle that can take some heat." She delicately began packing it back into its case. "This one's got promise."

"What are you going to name it?"

Shepard looked up at him, offended. Hands slowing the process of putting the rifle away.

"What?" he asked. He felt distinctly like a target on a wall, with Shepard honing in on him as she continued to express her offense with her eyes. "Snipers name their rifles before taking them out into the field, right?"

Right? After all, there was Mjolnir, and she referred to the rifle with no small degree of reverence. And while he hadn't worked with many snipers, all of their rifles had been named as well. He really should have caught on faster to Mjolnir being the name of her rifle, looking back.

"We  _do_ ," she said, and he felt the 'but' coming before the word even escaped her mouth as she paused to take a breath, "but I haven't found it, yet. Got some time to find the name that fits her before she hits dirt."

Alenko's eyes settled on the gun again as Shepard returned to packing it away, most of it already in the case. Rarely used and clean lines. It was thick and dark, unlike most Alliance guns. Contrasting vividly against its case, making its presence known. But in a muted way. A way that commanded attention without demanding it. "Gelle Klara."

Shepard's head whipped back up to look at him. "What?"

He shrugged, mildly embarrassed as Shepard continued to stare up at him. "Just… thinking out loud," he supplied. And when Shepard's eyes still didn't leave his face, he said, "I don't know why, but the dark contrast between the gun and the case reminded me of eyebrows. And you'd mentioned 'reliable' and 'temperamental' which reminded me of a character from a book I read."

Shepard didn't say anything as she looked back down at the rifle and finished up, snapping the clasps shut. All without saying a word. He was beginning to suspect he'd committed some sniper faux pas before Shepard, once the case was locked and she'd slung it over her shoulder, said, "Hopefully she'll never be lost to time."


	15. Chapter 15

**Part Two**

Shepard stared at the bed in the Captain's quarters.  _Her_  quarters, now. She'd spent her last night in the sleeper pods between Alenko and Williams, after the 'stepping down' party to commemorate Anderson's short yet robust command of the Normandy and her promotion to CO. Drinks, cake, and a passing of the ceremonial sword. A celebration which culminated in everyone lining up in dress blues bright and early for Captain Anderson's formal departure from the ship.

She'd given a brief speech over the ship's comm afterwards, officially promoted Navigator Pressly to XO at Anderson's recommendation, then called for a pre-mission debrief with her ground team and the XO in two hours. After that she'd handed Pressly a stack of datapads from her brief stint as the ship's XO, including her ongoing assessment of Alenko's potential for the position, with a written promise that she'd make sure Pressly had all her performance evals for Alenko's work in the field. Personnel transferring of duties, even within ship transfers like this one, were always accompanied by a mountain of catch-up work.

Until the debrief, she had her cabin to herself.

And a  _real_  bed.

She was almost tempted to take a nap. But aside from the fact that she was too wired despite a late night up talking shop with Williams after the party had ended, she had other matters to attend to. She marched towards the locker and shoved her entire bag into it. Time enough to sort through it and put things away properly later, tough she paused long enough to rifle through the contents and find her hard copy of  _Gateway_  and set it on her nightstand. This copy went with her everywhere.

How poignant that Alenko had brought it up the day before.

She had a feeling the name he'd suggested would stick, and she wasn't sure how to feel about  _that_. A sniper named her own rifle, but ever since he'd said it, she couldn't get it out of her head. It was down to either keeping the name or chucking the rifle in the bin - and the chances of the second one happening were almost as good as the odds of Udina paying her a genuine compliment, no strings attached.

Kassy had only just replied to her messages this morning, demanding to know the name of the rifle and just how she planned on abusing her power as Spectre. She'd also attached a picture of Major Owens - their former CO from her sniping squad days - giving a thumbs up at the news. Kassy had moved with him when he got his own command back in 2180, filling his slot for XO. They'd already split ways by then, as her N4 rank achievement had come with a promotion of the Cold Harbor a year earlier. She'd been thick in some classified ops when the Owens got his own boat, and unreachable. Even if she had been, Shepard wasn't the kind of sniper Owens had needed for his crew. Despite being an infiltrator and damn good at it, she was sent into hot zones reserved for N's more often than not.

Shepard had saved the picture to her 'tool.

After the journalist ambush yesterday, she was sure half of humanity knew the good news by now. Depending on air time. She'd been avoiding all the news outlets since yesterday. The last thing she wanted to see was herself losing her temper on air.

Not in  _bad_  way. Or at least, not a violent way. There hadn't been any punching or threats of violence or bodily harm, though a nice slap had crossed her mind when al-Jilani, deterred from talking about Shepard's dead relatives, had moved onto Shepard's dead girlfriend. A nice segue into the Blitz for the reporter. What better way to remind the viewers that humanity's first Spectre was the woman who'd saved an entire colony – and lost a loved one in the process?

What tragic heartbreak. People would be touched.

It was also a load of shit. It would be portrayed as romantic. Tragic. Yet look at Shepard standing there, strong and vibrant and showing that humanity just  _couldn't be knocked down_. She didn't need to watch the interview to know how it would be cut together and what sort of message the media would spin about her.

A positive one for now. A negative one later on if she fucked up.

So no, she hadn't been violent or done anything untowards, but she had snapped and bit off her words more than she should have.

Hopefully those of her crew who opted to keep up with the news were the forgiving sort. Or at least wouldn't begrudge her a short temper.

She flopped into the chair in front of her terminal, shrugging away the negative contemplations, and activated it, syncing all the info she'd gotten from the Council concerning Doctor Liara T'Soni, daughter of Matriarch Benezia, to the ship's database. The asari doctor was almost too young – at least for a member of her species – to be so accomplished, which spoke to her intelligence. At the very least her motivation and determination. The only question was whether or not her relationship with her mother was a good one.

That couldn't entirely be answered with the data she had at hand.

An archaeologist specializing in the study of Prothean ruins.  _That_  was either a fishy detail or a massive coincidence. Shepard rubbed her temples as the remnants of nightmares induced by the beacon whispered in the back of her head.

Hopefully that would calm down over time. Her head was already filled with enough regrets, she didn't need those of an entire species cramming themselves in between her own. Especially not at the mere mention of Prothean ruins and remnants.

Her door chimed. She pressed a button on her terminal and said, "It's open," making a mental note to leave the door open in the future to keep an open door policy. Even if she had to rewire the damned thing so it opened automatically during specific hours.

That wasn't a bad idea... depending on how mad Adams would be concerning her tinkering with the ship.

Pressly entered a second later, followed by Alenko and Shepard spun in her chair, gesturing for them to sit down.

"You look like men with a mission," she said by way of greeting as they scooted up to her desk in their chairs.

"Alien assignments," Pressly replied, and Shepard caught the barest hint of a grimace flash across Alenko's face as he settled in his seat. Disapproval, then – but Pressly was his superior and he knew when to hold his tongue.

Shepard returned her eyes to her XO. "What about them?"

She still wasn't sure where Alenko factored into this conversation. Non-human ship assignments had been delegated to her XO. Security credentials, pass codes, hours, etc. None of that was Alenko's job. He managed the ground team. So either Pressly had a problem with the ground team, or it was something else.

Pressly pulled out a datapad. "Adams assessed the quarian for engineering potential. He's impressed with her skill, but I'm not so sure..."

".. of her skill?" Shepard supplied when Pressly petered out and didn't continue.

The XO shook his head. "No, I don't doubt Adams' assessment of her potential. I have my reservations about her  _placement_. She was brought in for the ground team – I don't see why she should be given extra access to the ship's systems outside of that."

Shepard looked at Alenko, finally piecing together his part in the matter. "Do you agree?"

Alenko looked at her. "Respectfully, no."

"And you're here because...?"

Alenko glanced at Pressly before saying, "I questioned XO Pressly's schedule, and consequently his decision, this morning after Tali confronted me over the matter. She'd been led to believe differently."

"So I asked him to come," Pressly finished.

"I see," Shepard said. "You're dismissed, Lieutenant."

Alenko stood, saluted, and exited.

First hour of the first day and she was already at odds with her XO, potentially facing her first reprimand. Not what she needed or wanted.

"Care to enlighten me?"

"I'm not sure we should be entrusting the aliens with access to sensitive areas of the ship. A krogan mercenary, an ex-C-Sec officer who, frankly, strikes me as brash, and a quarian. None of them with the proper record, excepting perhaps the turian, to serve on a prototype warbird. With all due respect, Commander, we don't know their motivations - and until we do, their movements should be restricted."

"I hear your concerns," she said – and she did, she just didn't agree with him. But then, he hadn't had nearly as much time with them as she had. On paper, she wouldn't trust them either. "Garrus and Wrex are ground operatives as far as this mission is concerned, but each brings valuable intel and skills to the plate. They're going to need certain clearances to get the job done – and until they prove they  _can't_ , we're not gonna punish them on a maybe. Tali is a special case – but she  _was_  targeted by Saren, and not only did she find valuable information that brought the former Spectre to heel, she risked her life ensuring it got somewhere useful. She's also a technical genius – I read Adams's assessment, too. If he wants her on his team, he gets her." She let that sink in, and then added, "That doesn't mean a full security clearance, but there's a thing or two both sides could learn here. One of them's cooperation."

Pressly nodded. "I trust your judgment, Commander. Thank you."

She leaned forward and captured his eye. "Give them a chance before you dismiss them – and make sure you do it for the right reasons."

The XO nodded and Shepard smiled.

"Thank you, Pressly."

The XO heard her dismissal as much as her appreciation for being open with her about his concerns, and exited her cabin.

She waited a moment after he left before reprogramming the door to serve her open door policy. No one should have to knock for her time.

-O-

Alenko swept out of Shepard's office, but not before he caught a glimpse of  _Gateway_  on Shepard's nightstand as he returned his chair to the table in the center of the room. If the matter that had brought him there in the first place hadn't been an official one, he might have struck up a conversation about the book – or at least remark on her good taste in literature. Instead, he filed the anecdote away for later, when mentioning it wouldn't get him a boot in the ass and some harsh words – from both the CO and XO at once.

He'd gathered from her single comment last night that she at least knew of the book, but he hadn't realized it might have been a favorite. Shepard had only had the room for all of an hour. Non-favorite books wouldn't have made it to the nightstand so quickly.

The first mission debrief was still over an hour away, and he wasn't on duty till afternoon – provided the debrief didn't keep him. The whole fiasco with Tali had only happened because the kid had come to him early in the morning after finding out she didn't have clearance to be in engineering despite Adams informing her last night her first shift would start today. Alenko had known nothing of the matter until Tali brought it to his attention, which she'd only done after Adams directed her to him. Because he'd been listed as her CO as she was also a part of - rather  _only_  a part of - the ground team. So while Engineer Adams might have wanted to help, the authority on the matter fell to him.

It was one big headache and he didn't begrudge Shepard the less than tolerant expression on her face when they'd stormed her office and Pressly had referred to the non-humans as 'aliens'.

Alenko liked the man, he really did. But the XO gave off the impression of a stick in the mud with a bit of backwards thinking on the subject of other species. Not at all the sort of XO Shepard had been, yet more in line with XO's Alenko was used to serving under. In that regard, at least, there was no change except for the blip that was Shepard.

"Hey, Kaidan," Joker greeted him as Alenko entered the mess and bee-lined for the coffee pot. The pilot glanced at where he'd come from and said, "Not already in trouble with our new ship Captain, are you? 'Cause I think that'd set some sort of record."

Alenko huffed and sat down next to Joker in the lounge. "Nah, just settling the newest members of our crew into their positions."

Joker leaned back into the sofa, raising his hands behind his head in idle contemplation. "Didn't think that would require both the XO and the Head of Marine Detail to decide."

He shrugged and Joker let the matter slide.

After a few minutes of silence, the pilot leaned towards him conspiratorially and asked, "So... what do you think of the whole thing?"

Alenko stared at him. "What?"

"You know... with Anderson stepping down and Shepard taking up the reigns?"

Alenko shrugged. "I think it's fine?"

He wasn't sure what else to say.

"Oh come on, what a cop out answer. You knew before the rest of us. I could tell by your expression during the announcement, so don't even  _try_  to deny it. The only people who didn't fidget were you and Shepard which  _means_  you had the skinny before the rest of us. So, how'd you find out?"

Alenko shifted on the sofa, shuffling his coffee mug from one hand to the other. "Shepard told me yesterday afternoon at the gun range."

Joker whistled. "Shepard took you to a gun range?"

Alenko nodded. "Bumped into her after the L2 proceedings and she invited me."

"How pissed did she look?"

Alenko tilted his head as he looked at Joker. The pilot settled deeper into the sofa, legs splayed out, eyes bright. Whether he'd admit it or not (probably not) Joker was thick in the scuttlebutt mill. "She wasn't in the best of moods."

"I  _knew_  it! You must have caught her right after her interview with 'Khalisa Bint Sinan al-Jilani, Westerlund News'." Joker's impersonation of the reporter was highly exaggerated. "You know that spot just aired? Shepard was practically spitting bullets at the end! Did she spit bullets? At the gun range? Ah shit, you wouldn't tell me if she did."

"She bought a new Sniper Rifle."

Joker stared at him. Expressionless. "A new gun."

"Yeah," Alenko confirmed. "A new gun."

Joker shrugged in mild acceptance. "I suppose if the media hounded me about a dead lover, I'd buy a big gun, too."

Alenko made a noncommittal noise. He rather doubted that was the reason Shepard had purchased the rifle. If the interview had factored into her decision making at all, he'd eat his own boot. Someone like Shepard didn't just go out and buy a rifle when they were upset – her decision making process had been too calculating. The pro list she'd rattled off hadn't included, 'and a reporter pissed me off'.

"Not just any dead lover, either," Joker continued idly. "Did you know she was killed on Elysium?"

Alenko shook his head.

That was sad, and it upset him on Shepard's behalf that a reporter would try to use an emotional string to get a story for the vids. Marines put up with enough shit, they didn't need reporters drudging up every last dead loved one for views.

Joker leaned over and tapped him on the shoulder. "Hey, what are you up a couple nights from now?"

Alenko lifted his chin out of his hand, unaware he'd even been resting on it in the first place. "Providing we're not hitting dirt somewhere?"

Joker waved him off. "Yeah yeah."

"Most of my shifts are mids, so I should be free. Why?"

"You up for a game of kemps? I've got Williams in and Tali said she's gonna try and convince Garrus to play with her, too."

Alenko shrugged. He hadn't played the game since he was quartered up in Basic, dodging shut eye with a few other recruits. "Sure, why not?"

Joker grinned. "Cool. You'll need to find a partner, I already got dibs with Williams. Though I'd steer clear of Wrex. He just kind of... glared at me when I asked."

"Alright."

Joker rose from the couch and said, "Duty calls. See ya, Kaidan," before heading back up the stairs to the CIC.

Hanging about the mess didn't seem the most rousing of ideas, so he shoved off as well and made for the elevator to head towards the cargo hold. Over a week aboard the ship, and he still hadn't managed to check out the small gym. Nor had he had the chance to acquaint himself with how Williams liked the armory kept. He may be a higher rank than the Chief, but when it came to the armory, that was officially her territory. Anyone who made a mess of it had to answer to her.

He figured she'd by the type to question only after shoving a boot up the offending party's ass.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alenko met her halfway across the bay, an eyebrow arched in question. As her second on the field, it was unusual - but not unheard of - for him to at least not know any of the details concerning the mission. Yet under the circumstances, it was understandable. They'd searched through one system already without finding any trace of Doctor T'Soni, and this morning, Shepard had ordered they head to the Knossos System. They'd dropped out of FTL not thirty minutes ago, and that's when Joker had summoned her to the cockpit while she'd ordered Alenko to ready the ground team.
> 
> "Mako drop?" he asked, neatly executing an about face and falling in step with her.
> 
> "Mako drop," she confirmed, "We picked up Geth dropships on Lidar."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took a while. I'm fussy when it comes to combat, it's not my forte. But better late than never, yeah? I think I bridged this hump, so we should be back on something resembling a normal schedule here.

When Shepard entered the cargo bay, her ground team was already geared up and ready to go. She'd issued the order to Alenko only fifteen minutes ago. Even Wrex was ready, though the krogan rarely stripped out of his armor in the first place. He could still be heard grumbling under his breath about the turian every now and then - though it'd been made clear weapons were stored in lockers while aboard ship.

Alenko met her halfway across the bay, an eyebrow arched in question. As her second on the field, it was unusual - but not unheard of - for him to at least not know any of the details concerning the mission. Yet under the circumstances, it was understandable. They'd searched through one system already without finding any trace of Doctor T'Soni, and this morning, Shepard had ordered they head to the Knossos System. They'd dropped out of FTL not thirty minutes ago, and that's when Joker had summoned her to the cockpit while she'd ordered Alenko to ready the ground team.

"Mako drop?" he asked, neatly executing an about face and falling in step with her.

"Mako drop," she confirmed, "We picked up Geth dropships on Lidar."

"Any contact from the Alliance outpost?"

She shook her head and opened her locker, pulled out her armor case, and started stripping. "Gather the ground team, this is gonna be a quick and dirty debrief. We've got ten minutes till Joker makes the pass."

Alenko barked the order and Shepard marveled at him as she pulled on her undersuit. He had the lungs of a drill sergeant - yet none of the requisite coldness. His eyes were too warm, even as he shouted. They would betray him. But despite that, she doubted that people would actually be able to take advantage.

He held out her armor pieces and buckled her in when needed, for which she was grateful as it sped up the process, while Williams and Wrex did a weapons check as they waited. Once everything was mostly done, with Alenko finishing up with the back, she gathered the team in close.

"We drop in five and Geth are waiting for us. We may or may not find Doctor T'Soni here, but I doubt the Geth would be here otherwise. Alliance outpost is nonresponsive. Suspect Geth jamming signals, so we'll maintain a tight formation as long as possible." Alenko tapped her shoulder, signaling he was done, and she turned back to her locker to get her rifle. "Situation on the ground is unknown and we're going in hot with a Mako drop."

Alenko was already moving to the tank as she finished her sentence, Wrex right behind him. The krogan radiated readiness. Shepard finished unpacking Gelle Klara, aware of Williams watching. "Something you need, Chief?"

Williams jerked her head towards the gun. "You named her yet?"

"Christened her last night," Shepard nodded. She swung the rifle over her shoulder and attached it to the mag strip. She pocketed the scrap of scarf her scope had been wrapped it and pulled out the bullet necklace from her case, looping it over her head and tucking it under her breast plate.

Williams watched in fascination. "Never saw a sniper christen their weapon."

Shepard shrugged and headed towards the Mako, Williams hot on her heels. "Nothing terribly fancy. Kiss the stock, whisper the name. Some people carve it in, but, " she crossed her fingers, "if I ever lose the damned thing, last thing I want is her working properly for the enemy."

Wrex and Alenko hadn't lingered. Alenko slid over to the passenger seat when Shepard pulled open the driver side door, having activated the systems for her. Time was of the essence, and they had a shorter supply than normal on this mission. She hit the button to clear the cargo bay before she'd fully entered the seat and the klaxons blared overhead.

"Navigator Pressly just sent in the drop coordinates."

"How's it look?" Shepard buckled herself in.

Alenko frowned. "Lots of open lava vents."

"Let's hope Joker flies true."

Shepard became aware of bickering in the back and glanced over her shoulder to see Williams and Wrex kicking each other's legs, despite the fact that Williams was in the gun seat and Wrex was behind her. Williams muttered something about Wrex "hogging all the damned space" and the krogan fired back with something about "cramped quarters" and "damned human taking the big chair with all the room".

"Alright,  _children_ ," Shepard interrupted, eyeing both of them in turn. The effect was immediate and impressive, so she turned back to the front and caught Alenko shaking his head, a smile on his face, while loading the map Pressly had forwarded onto the dash.

Williams laughed. "Mom's strict and Dad's quietly amused."

Shepard didn't turn around, focusing on her pre-checks. "Excuse me?"

Williams leaned forward until her head popped up between Shepard and Alenko. "Parents sit up front. You're the strict yet cool Mom. LT might be strict, but he's also a softie. Scold you but then give you candy later once you're all cried out."

Alenko muttered something she didn't quite catch darkly under his breath, which only made Williams laugh all the louder. Even Wrex scoffed in the back.

Despite having trouble believing  _she'd_  be the cool parent, Shepard tapped Alenko on the leg and he looked at her, still grumbling. "She's just jealous that our kids would be gorgeous." As soon as the words were out of her mouth, the cargo bay doors opened. Her heart floated in her chest. The Mako drop was her favorite part. "Get ready to fly!"

Williams's head disappeared as soon as the words were out of her mouth and Shepard only waited long enough for the Chief to buckle in before she revved the Mako into gear and maneuvered off the ramp and out of the ship with a deft touch of the thrusters before the tank succumbed to the gravity of Therum.

Wrex was the only one who appreciated the freefall.

-O-

Shepard slithered up a small rocky outcrop overlooking the narrow valley her team was about to enter. She centered her scope and found Alenko rounding the corner, just out of visual range from the main playing field where the Geth were lying in wait. He motioned for the rest of the team to halt, then crept forward.

She re-centered her scope on the field.

She thumbed her comm channel open. "Don't go past the boulder that looks like a rabbit's head. You'll be in visual range of a sniper that has a direct line of sight."

" _I count one rocket trooper, three purple field units, and two hoppers,"_  Alenko said.  _"The hoppers are out of your line of sight."_

Shepard shifted on her perch and lined her scope on Alenko - who was looking directly up at her. He flashed a smile as if he knew she was watching. Even though he couldn't see her, she smiled back.

She directed her attention back to the field. "Two snipers, only one looking at the entrance, and a Geth armature guarding the mine entrance."

" _Sounds like a shit play, Commander,"_  Williams interjected.  _"What's the plan?"_

She did a visual scan of the field once more. Combat radar was junked as long as the purple guys were live. If only she could get her hands on a working memory core… collecting data a little bit at a time was slow-going. One core, and she'd have something to work with, something to program around. Combine her know-how with Alenko and Tali, and they just might be able to crack it.

Until then, well, good thing she was a scout sniper.

"I can take out the first sniper, but that'll compromise my position. Second sniper will be on me faster than we can blink, I'll have to move fast. In the mean time, that'll clear the opening for you guys to take up position near a series of mining crates. It's a bit of a dash, so Williams will provide cover fire for Alenko and Wrex. Focus on the armature and the rocket trooper. I'll take care of the second sniper once I reposition."

She counted her breaths and checked back on Alenko with her pocket scope, keeping her gun trained on the first Geth sniper. The others had moved up with him, and Williams was checking her rifle. The chief nodded sharply and Alenko looked back up at her and gave her the signal.  _"Ready on your mark."_

"Alright, Gelle Klara," she murmured, putting her pocket scope away, "Show me what you've got."

She tracked the Geth sniper while Alenko gave orders to the rest of the squad, noting it's movements and the wind conditions on Therum. All the open lava vents created swirling vortexes of heat. Little gusts that could turn a perfectly good shot bad, and she was about 500 meters away from her target. The sniper had chosen a good spot to sit up, near a couple of vents, but hadn't done anything to shore up its position. A makeshift tower right in the open.

Tali had mentioned that Geth intelligence increased the more units there were. Sharing a hive mind of information. After this mission, she was gonna pour through the helmet cam footage from the ground team and see if there were any noticeable patterns of behavior. Compile a list of differences based on the types of Geth and the number of units they faced. Tali's expertise in that area would be exceptionally helpful.

"Move in three," she said, uncomfortably aware that her comm had been open the whole time and her team had heard her talking to her gun. She mentally shrugged the thought away. "Three… two… one."

As soon as 'one' was out of her mouth, she fired and the Geth sniper went down. She didn't stick around long enough to see if Alenko and Wrex had started their run, rolling sideways immediately and sliding down the rocky slope. A spray of bullets from the second Geth sniper peppered her former location not a second later.

Just what she needed - a Geth sniper with a semi-automatic rifle. Just what her  _team_  needed.

She slid down the face and threw herself onto her feet the last few feet, rounding the corner in a sprint, Gelle Klara cradled in her arms making it a bit awkward but nothing she wasn't used to. No time to scale another outcrop if she wanted to take down the second sniper before it got a bead on her team and kept them pinned down while the rest of the unit advanced. That armature would muck shit up good.

She rounded the corner and raised her gun, slowing enough to focus her aim. She fired another shot, only pointing in the general direction of the sniper to keep its attention on her while Alenko and Wrex covered Williams' sprint now that they'd secured their position for the time being. She halted right at the base of the rock Williams had been using for cover just as the heat sink cycled down on her gun.

"Sit-rep?" she barked.

" _The hoppers are both down, as is the rocket trooper,"_  Alenko replied.  _"That second sniper nearly took me out while we were covering Williams - thanks for the cover shot."_

Shepard grunted in response.

" _Armature is on the move,"_  Williams added.

Shepard peered around the corner and spotted the Chief huddling in front of a crate approximately five meters behind and two to the left of Alenko and Wrex. The armature was repositioning itself so it would have a direct line of sight of both crates - not just the one occupied by Alenko and Wrex.

The Geth sniper had also moved position, no longer occupying the other makeshift tower.

Alenko was fiddling with his omni-tool while Wrex took a few potshots before bullets hit his barrier, forcing him back down. Williams immediately popped up and fired off a few rounds before she, too, was forced into cover. The two made a good team, balancing the fire load and covering the other seamlessly.

Shepard's omni-tool pinged and the combat radar flashed on her HUD with a partial restore.  _"Marked the sniper,"_  Alenko said.

So he had. One of the moving dots was glowing yellow instead of red on her HUD. The radar flashed in and out, but it was enough for her to get a bead on the sniper and take it out before it could do more damage. Once it was taken care of, Wrex tore out from cover and drew the attention of the armature. Shepard used the distraction to dash up and take the krogan's place next to Alenko. Williams had switched to her shotgun, focusing on one of the two remaining purple guys while Alenko amassed a spectacular amount of biotic energy. Once she was in position, Shepard opened her own 'tool and set the fab unit developing a tech mine.

The armature was nasty business, the crate shaking at her back each time it hit. One of them had almost taken out the weapons systems on the mako on their way in, and only a liberal use of the thrusters - which had set both Williams and Alenko swearing in their seats - had saved their asses. Shepard had pretended to not notice Williams muttering a prayer in the gun seat, or Alenko swearing liberally each time his ass left his chair.

Wrex's enjoyment was much more in line with her way of thinking.

She lobbed the tech mine over the rock and detonated it after counting to three.

"Fizzled!" Williams shouted and Shepard peered around her cover to see she'd hit her mark. The armature's guns were temporarily useless.

It turtled up, encasing its sensitive parts behind its shell while it waited for the overheat to cycle. "Shit!"

She fingered her belt and switched out her over-powered heat sink for a scram rail, quickly disassembling and reassembling the gun while Alenko covered her wordlessly.

"Just the big one, now!" Wrex roared, just as she finished up.

Unfortunately, its systems were back online.

The thing only got off one shot before it was lifted into the air. Shepard didn't question the maneuver, instead raising her gun and lining up her shot. Inhale, exhale.

Fire.

The lights flickered out in its head and it crashed into the ground. A deafening silence surrounded them in the aftermath.

"Hold," she ordered over the comms. Waiting. Peering.  _Feeling_.

The hairs on the back of her neck didn't prickle. She glanced at Alenko. "You feel like you're being watched?"

He shook his head. "No."

"Me neither. Let's move up."

He took up position on her six while Williams and Wrex stayed put in case shit hit the fan. Nothing did.

That  _almost_  made her feel like she was being watched - but still nothing came at them. No crack sniper shots knocking her on her ass.

"Shepard, don't move."

She immediately stopped walking, rotating her head to look at Alenko standing just over two meters behind her. He was assessing the ground at her feet - and when she looked down, she saw why.

Land mines.

The barest hint of a glow indicating their presence and fuck, she should have seen it coming a mile away. Why the entrance was guarded, but not  _heavily_  guarded. Why reinforcements had never spilled out from the tube. She was going to have to rebalance her assessment of Geth intelligence. What the Geth had lacked in physical numbers, the armature must have more than made up for.

It was a fucking miracle she hadn't already stepped on one.

Her heart thumped in her chest.

Both of them examined the ground with their omni-tools after she ordered Wrex and Williams to perform a perimeter check, seeing how far the mines extended and ensuring their sixes were covered in case it took a while to get her out of this SNAFU. Shepard had just decided it was safe enough to kneel down and get a closer reading off the nearest mine when her feet left the ground. She jerked her head up to see Alenko slowly backing away, clearing the edge of the field, one hand held out as he guided her up and over the mines.

The sensation was… unnerving. Like floating in Z-G, except she could  _see the ground beneath her feet_. She still felt weightless, and it was fucking with her sense of balance.

She'd shoot her own foot before admitting she was actually afraid he might drop her on top of a mine. Not that she thought he  _would_ , she had faith in him, but since when were fears ever rational?

"Don't drop me, Kaidan." She pretended she didn't hear the slight sing-song quality in her voice indicative of fear.

He set her gently on the ground in front of him, her arms braced against his as she'd unconsciously reached out for support coming down. She heaved a sigh of relief and glanced up at him. His brow was furrowed with sweat, and he nodded at her.

She nodded back. Job well done. Perfectly executed maneuver. And if he noticed her fear, he didn't say anything. Good. As it should be.

"Thank you," she stated, before whipping out her omni-tool once more, kneeling down, and seeing what they could do about the damned field blocking their path.

Alenko joined her with his own 'tool. "Any time."


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams was one-hundred percent convinced she'd signed on with a bunch of craziy assholes. Not that she doubted her own credentials in that department, but goddamn if Commander Shepard - the woman who dominated the media for a solid six months after the Blitz, whose face could still be found on Alliance recruitment posters plastered across the galaxy - wasn't the craziest sonofabitch she'd ever had the pleasure to work with.
> 
> To make matters worse, Shepard was the quiet crazy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a bit, life's been... well, life. The chapter also fought me until I realized that Williams wanted to say her piece, and once I started over with her, it was so much easier. And now she gets a POV voice! Anyway, enjoy - and I've already gotten a lot of the editing done for the next few chapters, so hopefully no more long waits. *crosses fingers* Thanks for sticking with me and reading and reviewing! <3

Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams was one-hundred percent convinced she'd signed on with a bunch of craziy assholes. Not that she doubted her own credentials in that department, but goddamn if Commander Shepard - the woman who dominated the media for a solid six months after the Blitz, whose face could  _still_  be found on Alliance recruitment posters plastered across the galaxy - wasn't the craziest sonofabitch she'd ever had the pleasure to work with.

To make matters worse, Shepard was the  _quiet_  crazy.

Like that minefield shit. Williams had heard Alenko on the comms as soon he told the Commander to keep her ass still - and the Commander hadn't even flinched. Didn't even utter a peep when Alenko lifted her ass into the air and into his arms, except to sternly order him to not drop her ass. The Commander was a devil woman once she was in armor and had a gun in her hands. That was without factoring in Shepard's driving skills into play, only topped by Wrex's enthusiastic enjoyment. At least the LT had been on her page with that shit, muttering curses under his breath while pretending he was doing no such thing every time Shepard cast him a wicked grin and asked for a navigational update.

Yeah, they were crazy all right. But she was just as crazy for not wanting to be anywhere else.

Now she stood off to the side with Wrex, keeping an eye on their surroundings, while Alenko and Shepard huddled around a console that "wasn't working right". Two peas in a pod. Williams hefted her rifle, glanced at Wrex, and indicated with a quick duck of her head which direction she was going to patrol. Wrex simply stared at her, only blinking once, before disappearing in the other direction. That was… something. She shook her head and informed Shepard they were doing a perimeter check. Shepard gave her a muffled "okay" before the geek bickering resumed. Something about  _this board_  and  _no, that one_  and a whole slew of tech shit she didn't know filtering in through the comm channel in her helmet. She had half a mind to turn it off, but that wouldn't be wise if shit hit the fan.

Leave the tech shit to the experts, that was her opinion. Though she had to admit Alenko had balls for going head to head with Shepard in an area where the Commander had more expertise.

Williams tuned out the chatter as she walked the perimeter of the large cavern. Excavation site? The walls were reinforced with beams, catwalks criss-crossing from one side to the other. Little platforms with consoles for research or scans. All of them perfect places for a sniper to set up camp and get the bead on them. Williams stayed close to the edges, looking up every few steps after a visual sweep of the base level.

The  _too dark_  base level. She was sure there'd been some lights around…

Her hackles raised when the chatter from Alenko and Shepard suddenly went silent. Williams crouched down and peered over her shoulder at Shepard and Alenko - twenty meters behind her. Neither appeared to notice the comm situation, though they were the only ones talking. Shepard was laying on the ground beneath the console, ripping a board apart, while Alenko stood over it. Still working on getting that laser going so they could cross through the chamber and free the asari archaeologist who'd managed to get her ass stuck inside a 50,000 year old security field. Damn scientist was probably dehydrated - and extremely lucky the geth hadn't managed to get through themselves.

She returned her eyes forward just as Wrex settled in next to her, moving quieter than she expected. "Comms are being jammed."

"Guess we get to go head-hunting," she replied, and Wrex chuckled. Low and quiet, but it still managed to have a feeling of reverberation.

"You wanna advance out or should I?"

Williams assessed the situation, scanning up the lengths of the catwalks above them. "You do it - I'll head back and give the nerds a heads up."

Wrex nodded and Williams waited for him to slip out before performing one more scan of the catwalks. Too many shadows and nooks. The geth had tipped their hand with the jammer… and maybe they didn't know it, yet. So instead of shouting back at Shepard and Alenko, Williams calmly stood up and walked towards them. Keeping her eyes on the catwalks without being too obvious, and her gun at the ready.

Until she saw the sniper bead on the back of Alenko's helmet.

She abandoned all pretense and sprinted the remaining meters, crashing into the LT with a shout and knocking him into Shepard who'd just started standing, carrying all of them to the ground. And not a moment too soon, as the crack of the rifle shot echoed through the chamber and the bullet blasted a hole in rock face larger than the LT's head. She scrambled off the marines and swiftly turned to a crouch, firing her rifle in the approximate direction of the sniper shot. A rough guess based on the trajectory - and Williams was only mildly surprised when she scored a hit. The thing plummeted to the ground in a satisfying  _cthunk_. Williams fired a few more rounds into the surrounding area, but either the sniper was alone on the walks or its buddies were already on the ground.

Just as the thought completed, the blast Wrex's shotgun echoed throughout the excavation chamber. Williams glanced over shoulder at the marines - Alenko was  _still_  on top of Shepard, though he'd at least sat up on her hips, repairing a crack on her helmet with some omni-gel. Williams would have felt guilty under any other circumstances at busting her CO's gear, but as it was, a cracked helmet was a small price to pay for preventing the LT's head from becoming abstract art. Alenko wasn't so stupid that he didn't glance up every now and then, and though Shepard had her pistol out, Alenko's ministrations prevented her from effectively covering them.

"I'm gonna go provide back up for Wrex. You got this here?"

Instead of answering, Alenko waved his arm and a small little dome shimmered around him and the Commander. Williams grunted in acknowledgment, then sprinted towards the krogan, but not before she heard Alenko mutter, "Hold still," in a no-nonsense voice.

There were only three platforms standing. Two more were on the ground with holes in their chests. Between the two of them, Williams and Wrex made short work of the remaining geth. The skirmish was over in less than a minute. She shared an enthusiastic grin with Wrex and briefly considered a fist bump before deciding against it. Cultural differences. She didn't know if he'd find that rude or what, and after her talk with Shepard two nights ago, well, she knew she had to make peace with aliens on the ship. It wasn't her call to make, though she appreciated Shepard letting her voice her opinion instead of shutting her down right from the start. If she had to work with them, Williams damn well would.

"Sitrep?" Shepard's voice filtered over the comms.

"Well, comms are back up," Williams replied. "Little geth ambush. Tipped their hand jamming the comms as they did, otherwise Alenko would be plastered all over a wall right now."

"Pleasant," the LT muttered, and Williams laughed.

Williams checked her combat radar, not that she expected it to show her anything different. The geth managed to keep that from working properly most of the time, and that jammer wasn't often attached to one of the walkers, but an independent device. Aside from that, she didn't like to rely on combat radar to tell her when a bad guy was about to get the drop on her. "We're clear, Commander."

"Good, get back here. Laser is up and ready to fire."

Williams clicked off her comm and trotted back to console, Wrex not far behind her. The krogan kept glancing up as he moved, checking the catwalks, and Williams kept her eye on him. Perhaps he wasn't a lumbering idiot after all. And maybe Shepard had a point.

Maybe.

The whole console was gutted with wires poking out everywhere. "What the hell did you two do to that thing?"

Shepard started to speak, but Alenko beat her to the punch. " _We_  got it working."

The Commander's mouth clicked shut, but instead of firing off a retort - even though her expression clearly stated that she had some choice words for a certain LT - she slapped her hand over a button. Alenko snorted.

"It was my program got it working."

Growing up with siblings, Williams could have told him it was a bad idea to open his mouth. Hell, even Wrex took a small step backwards, shaking his head at Alenko. Shepard prodded the LT in his chest and said, "Your program wouldn't have done shit without me rewiring the damned board."

"And whose fab unit materials did you pilfer to complete that task?"

Before Shepard could open her mouth, Williams inserted herself between the marines rather forcefully - though she couldn't entirely contain the amused expression from spilling across her face. "And you said  _we_  were the children." She jerked her head at Wrex to indicate who she meant by 'we'.

Alenko had the grace to blush and shut his mouth. Shepard? Not so much. "I needed those materials."

If Williams didn't know better, she'd peg Shepard for the oldest child. Always had to get the last word in.

"What did that button do?"

Williams didn't have to wait for someone to answer her question as the gigantic mining laser suddenly whirred to life next to them. Shepard pushed past Williams towards the console, sliding in next to Alenko, the bickering forgotten. Williams glanced at them as they coordinated the blast before deciding that keeping an eye on the gigantic ray of death was probably more important. In case one of them miscalculated and the beam was pointed in their direction.

"Blast site secure."

"Coordinates set?"

"Just calculating the depth. How deep are the chambers?"

"Uhh…"

Inspiring. Williams shared a glance with Wrex; and then both of them backed up a few more paces from the laser - and from Alenko and Shepard.

"… two and a half meters."

"Okay, okay."

Williams took  _another_ step back as Alenko moved away from the console, activating his omni-tool and directing it at the mining laser. "She's ready to fire!"

Shepard hit the big button again. The ground vibrated beneath her boots as the machine spun up and let forth a huge blast that seared itself across her vision, blasting the ground between them and the chamber. The concentrated beam moving upwards as it carved a path towards the chamber, clearing away rock and rubble in and spewing dust everywhere. Williams was extraordinarily grateful for the breather plates filtering the air into her helmet, though she activated her thermal sensors on the HUD as dust filled the room.

Last thing they needed was another geth surprise.

The sudden silence that filled the chamber when it was over was almost deafening. Williams waved her hand in front of her face in an attempt to clear the air, but all she succeeded in doing was swirling dust around her helmet. Shepard was the first to move ahead, her rifle out, ready to be raised at a moment's notice. She disappeared into the dust, becoming a dim shape. The LT took up position just off her shoulder, following a few meters behind. Williams stayed behind while Wrex moved forward to stand near the hole they'd blasted, keeping her eye on the room behind them. She still wasn't convinced they'd cleaned out all the geth. They hadn't found the source of the combat jammer after all, and Alenko's partial restore was only intermittently effective.

"There's another broken console," Shepard said.

Williams groaned.

After a moment, Alenko added in, "I think this might be an elevator."

"Let's regroup."

Williams confirmed the order over her comm and followed Wrex through the tunnel. She kept her eyes over her shoulder the whole time. No surprises. No more little red lights sighted on her teams heads. Not on her watch.

Wrex stood near the ledge, positioned about thirty feet above him, staring up. Williams moved towards him and cocked her head up to see where he was looking. "You hear that?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"The asari's freaking out."

"Huh." That didn't surprise her. "Jumpy at loud noises. Too bad we can't get someone up to reassure her."

Williams glanced over her shoulder at Shepard and Alenko, the former bent over the console while the latter was sifting through something on his omni-tool. No program she recognized - but most of hers were geared towards blowing things up and basic hacks. Standard Alliance package in case she was ever on her own without a team. Otherwise, that shit was left up to the techs.

She had a feeling Wrex was more along her lines than the geeks.

"Could float someone up," Wrex stated.

Shepard looked up at that. "Float someone up?"

That caught Alenko's attention, and the LT looked first at Shepard then at the ledge. "Never could pick myself up," he murmured.

That caught her by surprise. Williams never would have considered a biotic picking  _themselves_  up in a mass effect field. It just didn't strike her as… possible.

"Can you pick Alenko up?" Shepard called out to Wrex. Alenko started at that, a small jolt of surprise. And even though she hadn't been looking at him, Shepard said, "There's a terminal up there, we could coordinate, maybe figure something out."

Wrex barely waited for Alenko's answering nod before he lifted the Lieutenant off his feet. His accompanying chuckle made Williams turn back around to look at the Lieutenant - and she laughed out loud herself at the site of Alenko, spinning in the air around the central post, arms crossed.

"Very funny," he said.

 _That_  got Shepard's attention and the Commander peered up and froze. Williams braced herself for the dressing down Wrex was about to get. But then  _she_  was surprised when instead, Shepard lifted her omni-tool up as Alenko floated ten feet in the air above her, Wrex spinning him to face her, and Shepard  _snapped a photo_.

"That's real great, Shepard," Alenko said, pointedly staring at her despite the continuous rotation. To Wrex, he said, "Put me down."

Williams slid towards Shepard who was still staring up at the LT spinning in the air. Arms crossed over his chest as Wrex finally complied. Alenko muttered the whole way, rumbling in her ear over the comms. "Should frame that and hang it in the mess, ma'am."

Shepard returned to the aged console. "I think Alenko might kill me if I do that."

"Nah, he's not the mutinous type. Besides," Williams glanced over her shoulder where Wrex was just getting Alenko up to the platform, "He can't kill you if his feet aren't on the ground."

"You forget he could just fling my ass backwards whether his feet are on the ground or no."

"Only if you let him, ma'am."

Shepard eyed her at that, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Indeed. Give me a hand. Wrex, watch the entrance!"

Shepard knelt down under the panel, studying the parts while Williams shifted up next to it without a fucking clue concerning what she was looking for or supposed to do. "Is this thing even on?"

"I'm working on that, tell me when it lights up." A head peeked out from the back. "You got any copper on you?"

Williams shook her head and Shepard grumbled something that sounded awfully like  _should have taken it when I had the chance._  "Where's yours?"

"Used it on the last console."

Williams glanced around for scrap, but they weren't exactly in a scrap filled place.

As if reading her thoughts, Shepard said, "I can make do without it, copper would just make it easier."

" _Got the doctor down,_ " Alenko's voice filtered over the comm. " _She_ _'_ _s a bit shaken up, but fine otherwise._ "

"Console?"

" _It_ _'_ _s live, but - what?_ " Williams shared a quizzical look with Shepard as the Commander slowly stood up, wires in hand. " _Are you sure? Okay. Yeah, okay. Shepard, hold on._ "

The line cut out as Alenko clicked his comm off and Williams raised her eyebrows. After thirty seconds of silence, the elevator started moving. Caught off guard, Williams stumbled a bit, but Shepard, she noted with wry amusement, didn't even budge.

The asari doctor greeted them at the edge of the elevator as it slowed to a halt, joined a few seconds later by Alenko who, without saying anything, reached into a side pocket, pulled out a fab package, and handed it to Shepard. "You're gonna need this to get it moving again."

A quick glance confirmed what Williams already suspected: copper.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Too many earthquakes, too little time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of time spent traveling recently (personal and family reasons) so this got delayed longer than expected. I've also had my own issues (which I very briefly mention on my main blog and have a side blog for if you're curious) so sometimes writing is a struggle - but we're finally here with the end of Therum! I actually consider this one of the more boring-to-write parts of the whole game, so hopefully my pace is a bit faster after this. Thanks for sticking around and all the lovely reviews!

Shepard leaned back on her left foot. A bold move that made it appear as if she was leaving herself open - but she'd leaned back on the foot she used to brace herself while aiming with her rifle. Almost the exact stance she'd had on the range with Gelle Klara, Alenko noted. Shepard didn't even stumble as the ground rumbled ominously again. A telltale sign that Doctor T'soni wasn't far wrong in her prediction of an incoming explosive seismic event. "She'll stay with us, thanks."

The krogan merc wasn't a biotic, as far as Alenko could tell. Alenko glanced at Wrex, but their krogan merc gave no indication either way. Williams had hung back, sticking near the asari who'd taken a shine to the Chief. Much to Williams's chagrin.

The asari was a biotic, but he rather doubted she'd be useful in a fight. She'd already cleaned out his energy bar supply and Shepard's water reserves. The best he could provide without proper facilities to combat her severe dehydration and lack of nutrition. At least she was on her feet and steady.

Well, he amended as he glanced back at her just as she happened to waver on feet, mostly steady.

"Wrong answer," the merc replied, having  _not_  won the staring match he'd initiated with the Commander.

That was all the indication anyone needed. In an unspoken agreement, Alenko dive-rolled to the right while Shepard did the same to the left. Alenko didn't take the time to glance back at Williams and the doc, trusting the Chief to have her shit together.

Wrex charged in the opening they'd created, straight towards the krogan merc. Fist glowing blue as he sucker-punched the merc straight in the chest. With the big guy distracted, Alenko shifted his focus to the advancing geth, half ducking behind their meager cover between pot-shots.

The fight was over before it even really had a chance to begin. Shepard picked off the geth snipers as soon as they popped out of cover with deadly expertise, as their cover was limited to the singular entrance into the elevator - no contest. Wrex went head to head with the krogan merc - the only major threat in the room, as Alenko lifted anything else for easy target practice that so much as set one foot inside the elevator shaft. Only two platforms made it inside the elevator, but their presence hadn't lasted long.

Alenko had honestly feared a rocket trooper, but the geth hadn't had the foresight (or working platforms) to deploy a rocket trooper against them. The confined space would have made their escape significantly harder - and bloodier.

Another tremor shook them, this one almost hard enough to knock them off their feet, giving them the impression of a boat on a stormy sea. Heat spewed forth between the cracks along the wall, and it didn't stop with the tremors. Alenko's HUD registered increasing external temperatures.

"Time's limited, let's go," Shepard ordered, and then raised her hand to her comms, radioing Joker who was  _less than thrilled_  at the prospect of a ground side pickup, confirming what they already suspected topside: volcanic activity.

Alenko had just helped boost Shepard up, with Wrex pulling the Commander up from the platform above, when he noticed Williams cradling her ribs. "What happened?" he asked, lifting the asari. The Doctor appeared as if she might drop at any moment.

"Took a hit, but I don't think it punctured anything."

Alenko frowned as the ground shook again. He shoved her fingers aside and quickly examined the impact sight. Thinning his lips as he considered the wound; she'd been shot and hadn't cried out. Suit medi-gel systems would have provided some immediate pain relief, but she still would have felt it.

"What's the hold up?" Shepard hollored. "This cavern's gonna drop on our heads at any moment."

Blood seeped through the crack in her armor. Not a lot, indicating the armor had absorbed most of the force - but enough. "Williams took a hit." He looked up at the Chief's face. "I can medi-gel it, seal it up, but that's all till we get to the ship. Can you run?"

Her face was already paling from the pain, but she nodded. "I think so."

Alenko wrapped his arm around the Chief to hoist her to her feet, pulling her arm around his neck for support. She grunted, but that was the only indication of pain she gave. He hauled her up onto the ramp as gently as he could, but this time the tremor didn't subside. Not so hard they couldn't run, but definitely serving as a ticking clock and the sand in their hourglass was running out fast.

The rest of the team was already well ahead of them on the ramp, Shepard supporting the asari though the doctor was capable enough to run on her own. Wrex was further ahead, clearing debris out of their way, his cackling roars echoing over the rest of the noise pollution.

Williams slipped and her face blanched as a particularly violent shake lurched the catwalk and Alenko slipped off the edge. He caught himself on the edge, Williams following him down, slamming onto her knees. She hissed out a string of curses after audibly swallowing, her free hand clutching the gunshot wound. Alenko pulled himself back up just as Shepard reappeared next to them and hauled Williams up.

"Joker's got the ship in position outside, but we're out of time!"

Between the two of them, they got Williams off the catwalk and up the tunnel ramp. The whole thing vibrating so hard Alenko worried it was about to drop on their heads - but then they made it through the door.

And he could see why Shepard had been so urgent about getting them out as fast as possible. The lava flows they'd driven past on their way to the mining facility had overflowed. This whole area was about to blow and he didn't know where the pressure point was, but if he had to guess… well, their current position wasn't looking good.

The distance between the ship and the platform was too far for Williams to jump. Not in her current condition. "I can throw her over," Alenko said.

Shepard looked at him, nodded, then took a running leap, slamming onto the open bay doors solidly. She turned around immediately as Alenko amassed a powerful field and, more forcefully than he intended, but the time for finesse wasn't there, lift-threw the Chief over the gap. Williams crashed like a truck into Shepard's open arms.

He was just about the take the leap himself when the platform shifted beneath him and he almost slipped over the edge. He scrambled for the rail before turning around - only to see the gap had widened an additional meter. Assessing the distance, and the shortened (and rapidly sinking) platform he was on, he wasn't sure he could make it, but like hell if he wouldn't try.

Alenko took a deep breath and hurled himself towards the Normandy. The heat from the lava washed over him, and his envirosuit kicked into overdrive. That  _still_  wasn't enough to prevent him from breaking out into a sweat as he overheated inside his own armor - but then he made it to the ship, barely managing to catch the edge of the bay doors with his fingers, vaguely aware of Shepard shouting something over the comms, overriding Joker's own shouting.

The bay door started closing, giving him blessed relief from the intense heat, aided by the ship taking off. As the door swung up, he found a pushing off point for his feet once the angle lined up - and then Shepard was there, pulling him over the edge as he pushed himself up and over, culminating in him rolling onto her once the angle of the bay door was halfway to being closed. The didn't stop tumbling until they came to a rest of tangled limbs at the bottom of the bay doors. The solid hiss of a seal punctuating their stop.

Alenko blew out a massive breath, not entirely sure if he was on Shepard or if she was on him, only that he was looking up at the ceiling. "That was… lively."

Shepard laughed. An open, ringing laugh that echoed throughout the cargo bay as she snapped open her helmet. "No more lava vents," Shepard said once she calmed down.

"Oh, I don't know," Alenko replied, pushing up to rest on his elbows, "they added a nice touch."

Shepard sat up herself, untangling her legs from his, thus allowing him to sit up all the way as well. He removed his helmet, welcoming the sweet sensation of air on his head. "Williams made it to the med-bay alright?"

"Yeah, Wrex saw her up. Liara, too."

"Good," he nodded, "good. Shot looked bad, but I don't think it was  _actually_ bad. Well, as far as gunshots go."

He'd certainly seen worse, and from his quick field-eval it wasn't fatal. Just painful. The bullet probably only did surface damage, with her shields and armor taking the brunt of the force.

"She's got some punch, that's for sure," Shepard agreed. "Armor is fucked though."

Before he could respond, Joker's voice filtered over the ship-wide comm. The pilot didn't entirely mask his irritation as he asked,  _"_ _Are you guys alive down there?"_

Shepard huffed a quiet laugh before responding. "We're alive, Joker."

Joker sighed audibly - whether from relief or irritation remained to be seen. Probably a mixture of both, if Alenko had to guess.  _"_ _Too close, Commander. Ten more seconds and we would have been swimming in molten sulfur. The Normandy isn't equipped to land in exploding volcanoes. They tend to fry our sensors and melt our hull. Just for future reference."_

Shepard snorted, as did Alenko. And with Shepard's line still open, the pilot heard it judging by the scoff that followed before the line was cut.

Ten more seconds, and he would have been a molten pile of human, too. Plenty of time to give Joker crap about that later, though the pilot was undoubtedly letting off some post-mission adrenaline, shedding the 'we just fucking survived that' jitters. Hell, Alenko was sitting in the middle of a high right now, having come so close to being a puddle of human soup. The thought wasn't tantalizing, and each movement on Shepard's behalf next to him was keenly felt as he was keenly aware of his continued existence. He almost leaned back against the floor so he could simply stare at the ceiling and marvel some more, but he had to get out of his armor and care for his gear. Speaking of…

"I'll take Williams's bench duty," he offered, eyes sliding to the locked up section of the cargo bay designated for the armory.

"I'll split it with you," Shepard replied. "Gotta put Gelle-Klara away, anyway. Might as well help."

Alenko glanced at the rifle still mag-locked to her shoulder. Williams had given him hell the previous night when he'd mentioned Shepard's new rifle and the name that had slipped between his lips. Her look had been almost as scandalized as Shepard's when Alenko had inquired after the name in the beginning. "Gelle-Klara?" he asked.

Shepard stood up and offered him her hand. "The name stuck."

He released her grip once he was on his feet, not quite meeting her gaze. Williams's words ringing in his ears that the naming of a rifle was, for a sniper, as much as others wouldn't really understand, a deeply personal thing. He really hadn't intended to interfere in the process. But he stuck by his claim and was not-so-secretly pleased that she'd chosen the name he'd let slip through. "I promise I won't touch it," he said, acknowledging the importance of the relationship between a sniper and her gear. "Besides, I haven't dismantled one myself since basic. Don't know that I'd trust myself to put it away properly."

Alenko followed Shepard to the center console in the bay, checking the pressure seal before releasing the locks on all the compartments. "Got my own routine, anyway. Besides, you wouldn't live long enough to fulfill the 'you break it, you bought it' deal."

Alenko laughed, a fond memory from basic popping into his head of the Gunnery Chief slapping two sticks together in the air, dramatically forming a plus sign as he shouted about the 'two lines you never want to cross' when it came to a sniper.

"What?" She opened her locker and began removing her gear, giving him a curious raise of her brow as she started the methodical process.

"Ah, nothing," Alenko responded, a smile still on his face. "Just something Gunny Moravec used to say."

Shepard paused opening the latches on her chest-plate. "You had the old bastard, too?"

"Only for sniper rifle weapons training, but that was an intense week." He leaned against his locker, staring at nothing in particular as he brought the memory to the surface. "Knew it wasn't the path for me the first day when he brought out another recruit, wasn't even out of basic herself, yet she kicked all our asses on the field test. Nailed three targets in less than ten seconds, barely breaking in between each shot. Should have seen the look on Jake's face… what?"

He'd gotten so lost in the memory, he'd missed the change of expression on Shepard's face from amusement to disbelief. She squeezed her eyes shut, brow screwing up in concentration in a shockingly adorable way. "'Your sorry asses have got a lot of ground to cover if any of you hope to go down the sniper path.' Uhh, first name started with an M I think… Moorski? Peters, another one I don't remember, and Alenko." She opened her eyes and looked at him at the mention of his name, then finished. "Line up and watch Shepard carefully. She's only gonna do it once, so you four better get it good because you're gonna demonstrate to the rest of the class."

"That is…" Alenko spluttered, "Morowski, Jake Morowski."

"Your friend on the docks?"

Alenko nodded, dumbfounded. "Shit."

Shepard snorted, finally continuing the armor removal process. Spurring him into action himself. He still remembered that day pretty vividly. Or rather, the part that came next - the part that took place after the recruit that showed them all up left. After  _Shepard_  left. He found it almost hard to believe they'd been in basic together, even if only in passing.

"You know, after seeing you shoot like that, Jake was convinced he wanted to be a sniper. Dedicated a whole week to the preliminary training program." Alenko smiled at the memory of Jake touching every scope on the table, wanting to pick 'the best one'.

"How'd he do?"

"Well," Alenko said, shaking his head at the memory of Jake spending all of the little free time he had 'honing' his skill, "He's not a sniper."

Shepard laughed. "He seemed too sweet to make it through the program."

"I tell him you called him 'sweet', he's gonna shit himself."

She slipped out of her under-armor and grabbed a towel off the shelf, just as the elevator doors opened on the other side of the cargo bay and Wrex stepped out. "Do I wanna know?"

"Probably not." Wrex moved past them with a pointed look punctuated by a sniff. While the action itself was curious, Wrex's presence got him thinking about another subject altogether. "Don't think you're off the hook for snapping a candid shot of me in a precarious situation."


	19. Chapter 19

Williams sat up on the bed, grunting against the dull, throbbing pain in her side. The bullet wound hadn't actually been the worst part of the whole ordeal. Damn geth had used a tungsten round, shattering her chest plate just below her right breast. The exploding chest plate had, in turn, cracked three ribs.

After dressing the wound properly, Chakwas had given her a dose of bone weave, and the shit was still working its painful magic. Not to mention keeping her awake. Williams twisted just enough to shove her pillow further up the bed so she could lean against it. Her side ached fiercely and she blew out a breath between her teeth as she settled in against the pillow. What she really wanted to do was leave the medbay altogether, but she was still under house arrest. And her jailer was nowhere to be seen, either. Probably in bed at whatever god awful hour it currently was.

She checked her 'tool for the time - just after 0400 hours.

Williams wanted nothing more than to roll over and fall back asleep, but the possibility of that actually happening diminished drastically with each passing minute. She was just about to kick the blanket off and risk Chakwas's ire by slipping into the mess hall to grab a cup of coffee when the doors hissed open.

"Shit, I wasn't gonna-" Williams started until she saw who it was, "Oh, hey Skipper."

Shepard raised an eyebrow as she walked across the medbay with two cups of coffee - and handed her one. "Considering a jailbreak?"

"You're a godsend," Williams murmured into the cup, inhaling the aroma of the coffee. "These walls are driving me crazy."

"Thought you'd be up." Shepard pulled up a chair and sat down next to her. "What's the time line?"

"Doc has me under observation till end of day, then I'm restricted to light duty for at least three more days. Potentially more pending a medical exam."

Shepard waved a hand. "You'd be fucked anyway. Armor is crapped."

"Thanks for the highlight, Skipper," Williams replied flatly. Shepard snorted. "Did I miss the debrief?"

"Yup," Shepard nodded. "Kaidan took your bench duty, too."

Williams leaned towards the Commander, a stern look in her eye. "How  _is_  my bench?"

"I helped," Shepard shrugged.

"That doesn't answer my question, 'cause by 'helped' you really mean you put your own rifle away and didn't let him touch it. Did he move my tools? Are the towels out of order? There's a system to it - does he know the system?"

Shepard busted up laughing, which Williams took offense to. She opened her mouth, ready to give Shepard a good what for when the Commander held up a hand to forestall her. Still laughing. "You know you have that diagram posted right on the wall, right? Kaidan followed that fucking diagram to a goddamn T. Wouldn't let me touch the bench when I didn't follow it. Your bench is in good hands, Chief."

"I'm surprised he let you put your own rifle away, then," Williams muttered. "Tell me about the debrief."

"You didn't miss much." Shepard was still laughing in between breaths, which Williams pointedly ignored. She stood by her comment about letting the CO put her own gun away, sniper superstitions or no. "Doctor T'Soni doesn't have a lot of intel that we can use, though she was adamant that she and her mother haven't talked in a while. We could certainly use her expertise on Prothean ruins, and she's agreed to stay on and help with that."

Williams harrumphed. The asari doctor had practically clung to her the whole return trip, up until the moment Williams was shot. She didn't begrudge the doctor the incident. Accidents happened on the field, she took the hit in the line of duty doing her job. She'd do it again, exactly the same, if she had to. It was the  _clinginess_  that had gotten to her. At least the doctor had caught her when the bullet struck, helping her behind cover, with a weak barrier to add protection.

She'd already voiced her opinions to Shepard the second day after they left dock at the Citadel, and Shepard had listened to her whole spiel before firmly, but politely, shutting her down. Well, not even 'shutting her down', that wasn't exactly right. But that wasn't what mattered to Williams - her CO had listened to her, let her have her say and consider her opinions before saying no. Shepard was a better CO than she'd ever had, better than most marines she'd worked with. The Commander listened, to everyone.

It was refreshing for someone like her, with the reputation of her family haunting her every step.

Williams imagined, though she had very little experience herself, that it was nice for Alenko, too. Shepard didn't seem to judge the biotic marine the way Williams had heard biotics were typically treated. Certainly didn't treat him with indifference. In fact, the two were two peas in a pod when it came to being nerds.

If she hadn't discovered otherwise, she'd have sworn Shepard and Alenko were long time friends.

"So," Williams said, breaking into the comfortable silence that had followed her ruminations, "What the hell are you doing up at 0400 hours?"

The door opened before Shepard could get out more than, "Couldn't get-" and Alenko sleepily stumbled into the medbay, wearing only a t-shirt and loose fitting sweat pants. Both women stared at him as he moved towards the cupboards, not acknowledging - maybe not even noticing - their presence. One hand across his forehead as if he was shading the light from his eyes, but the lights, Williams noted, were already pretty dim. She looked towards the Commander questioningly, but Shepard only had eyes for Alenko. Brow wrinkled in concern and she looked as if she was about to say something, but wasn't sure if she wanted to disturb the Lieutenant when he was so obviously focused on his task.

For his part, Alenko opened the crew medicine cabinet, still shading his eyes with one hand as he grabbed a bottle with another. Shepard leaned in close to Williams and whispered, "Migraine," barely loud enough to hear.

And then it all clicked. Of course, she'd heard about side effects of the biotic implants but had never connected the concept with the LT. Williams slipped her eyes back to Alenko as he finally dropped the hand shading his eyes to open the bottle. She felt bad for him, and not in the pitying kind of way. More in the 'it's fucked up that a piece of metal in your brain brings you to your knees' kind of way.

But she didn't want to say anything, in case his type of migraine also came with auditory sensitivity. She also just didn't want to to embarrass him, since he'd completely missed their presence from the get go. Solely focused on the meds and nothing else.

After tossing the pills back, Alenko moved towards the hand-wash sink and splashed water on his face. Then, much to Williams's surprise - and she quickly averted her eyes - he flipped the bottom of his shirt up to wipe his face, exposing a generous portion of his midriff. Shepard did the same, hesitating a second longer before burying her face in her coffee cup.

Williams didn't blame her. The LT certainly had eye candy potential, if she wanted to think of him that way.

Carefully, and as quietly as she could, Williams shifted close to Shepard and tapped her shoulder. "Should we cough or something?"

Shepard studiously kept her gaze in her mug as she shook her head. Williams gaped at the Commander. "Skipper, are you… blushing?"

"Oh."

Both women whipped their heads up to find Kaidan standing halfway between the sink and the door, finally having taken note of their presence. He shuffled his feet, one hand floating up to rub his temples as he squinted at them. "I didn't mean to interrupt anything," he said. Voice barely loud enough to carry.

"It's alright," Williams started to say, just as Shepard stood up from her seat and said, "I've got some things I need to take care of anyway."

Shepard waved her hand noncommittally in the direction of her office as Alenko shifted his gaze to her. Then without preamble, the Commander marched towards the door and was gone. No looking back, as if she were a woman on a mission and that mission was to get the fuck out of the current room.

Alenko stared after her, eyes still squinty, and rubbed the back of his neck before looking back at Williams. For her part, she simply shrugged. "Feel better, LT."

-O-

Shepard tapped the door in the back of the medbay, careful not to disturb Williams as she slept. The Chief may have groused about being confined to the medbay, and the early morning chat had certainly served as a reprieve against the monotony of lying in a bed, waiting for the body to heal, but she never would have left long term. Not before the good doctor told her it was okay.

Chakwas cut a formidable figure when she wanted to. Even Shepard wouldn't risk the Doc's ire.

The door opened with a soft chime, and Shepard stepped inside. Eyebrows climbing up her forehead as she took the scene in. Doctor Chakwas had assured the asari that the backroom was used primarily as storage for back up supplies, so if the scientist needed a place to sit down and do some work there'd be plenty of room. Shepard hadn't anticipated that to encompass the asari scientist taking over every unused surface and crevice in the whole place. Though where she'd gotten the gear was beyond her. There'd certainly been no stops after their swift departure from Therum. Still in orbit over the planet as communications with the other facilities had been necessary. Shepard had agreed to wait for the Alliance cruiser on its way before leaving the system, to provide emergency support if that became necessary.

Fortunately, only the facility Liara had been at had suffered any lasting damage from the explosive volcanic activity. The rest hadn't even known anything was amiss until after her team had departed, believing the communications issue to be either hardware or weather related. The latter apparently a not uncommon occurrence. The scientist in charge at the nearest base had blanched when Shepard told her the news. But then she'd willingly volunteered to take over notifying the families of the deceased.

One burden off Shepard's list.

All of Shepard's morning after visiting with Williams had been spent in various vid-meetings with Alliance personnel on Therum and the Captain of the Cruiser on its way to the system to take over. She was, frankly, exhausted. The day had taken its toll, and she wanted nothing more than to collapse into her bunk with a good book and a cup of coffee to see her through the rest of the evening.

And it wasn't even dinner time yet.

"You have a moment?" Shepard asked, settling on top of crate.

The doctor twisted around in her chair. All the windows on her terminal had been quickly minimized as soon as Shepard entered the room. Suspicious, maybe. Or the asari could simply be a private person – something with which Shepard could empathize.

When Alenko had marched into her office earlier in the day with the ground team reports, she'd deactivated hers before he'd even had time to glance up from his 'tool.

A little frown had pulled at the corner of his lips upon reading whatever message was displayed, and melted away as soon as he looked at her. Her stomach had done a little flip flop at that, her fingers still resting on the display off button, and she was sure she'd stared at him for entirely too long before remembering to open her mouth and speak, as the memory of him standing at the sink early in the morning, pulling his shirt up… not a memory she needed to be dealing with now, either.

He'd only been in her office for ten minutes, but she found she wouldn't have minded him staying longer. Had wanted him to stay longer, because she very much enjoyed his company. Thoughts she really shouldn't be having as his CO, but they came unbidden. All she could do was stomp them out like little fires plaguing the landscape of her mine. Except like a brush fire, it just kept spreading.

"Of course." Liara sat up in her chair, not quite meeting Shepard's eye. "Are you coming to check up on me?"

"How are you settling in?" Shepard gestured to the rest of the room for emphasis.

"Very well, thank you. Doctor Chakwas supplied me with a few unused terminals and pointed me in the direction of items I could check out until we next visit a place where I can resupply myself."

Shepard held up a hand again to forestall the asari. "Check with our requisitions officer and give him a list of anything you need. So long as you're a part of my crew, we can outfit you with the gear you need to get the job done. Unless you prefer having personal items."

"I have few personal items," Liara answered. "Thank you, I shall do that."

The asari was silent for a moment. Clearly something on her mind, so Shepard patiently waited.

"I never properly thanked you for saving me from the geth, Commander. If you hadn't shown up…"

Shepard waved her hand, dismissing the speculation of alternative outcomes. She'd long ago learned to abandon that way of thinking, not worrying over what might have been and instead focusing on what could be. "We got there in time."

Liara stepped closer to Shepard, eyes intent. "I want you to know I am not like Benezia. I will do whatever I can to help you stop Saren."

"I believe you, Liara."

"Even though some of your crew may not?"

Shepard nodded. She  _did_  believe the asari was telling the truth - otherwise the Doctor would not be on the ship. That was putting aside her usefulness with Prothean research. A knowledge base which would undoubtedly come in handy if they wanted to beat Saren at his own game.

That wasn't enough for Liara. Or perhaps the asari simply wanted to convey the extent of her experience to prove how useful she could be as she spoke about her credentials, the choices she made and why she made them. A sense of youthful urgency to be taken seriously beneath all her words, and Shepard recalled the asari saying she was 'only 106' during the debrief. Despite Shepard's years of service, getting used to such a vast age difference - and the maturation rates that came with that - was still something she was constantly doing.

"… That is why I find you so fascinating. You were marked by the beacon on Eden Prime; you were touched by Prothean technology!"

The back of her mind buzzed with unrecognized words, muted whispers she could  _almost_  understand. Pushing it to the background was becoming an increasingly easier task. "Sounds like you almost want to dissect me in a lab somewhere."

Shepard punctuated the remark with a smile, but Liara missed it, eyes going wide. "What? No! I did not mean to insinuate- Ah, I never meant to offend you, Shepard. I only meant that you would be an interesting specimen for an in depth study. No- that's even worse!"

"Calm down, Liara," Shepard said, reaching out to pat the asari reassuringly on the shoulder, "I was only joking."

"Joking? By the Goddess, how could I be so dense?"

Shepard couldn't resist the small laugh that escaped her lips, and Liara looked up at her, biting her lip. "I am not very good at interacting with other people, as you can see."

Shepard huffed. She had people skills, sure, that came with officer's training and the N program. But she could certainly empathize with the inability to talk to other people as if they were just  _people_. Leading people, inspiring confidence and gaining trust, that she could do. Candid conversations came less easily.

Shepard stood up, getting ready to go. "Unless there's anything else you require…?"

Shepard could always count on the asari to make her feel of a normal height. The tallest of the species she'd ever met had only been an inch taller than Shepard was, and Liara was the same height as her. Much unlike Alenko, the tallest human on the ship standing a full foot above Shepard. Then there was Garrus and Wrex who towered over everybody else. Wrex claiming total height advantage, well above eight feel tall.

"I uh, no, Commander, thank you." The asari bit her lip again, but after a few moments of extended silence, Shepard turned to go. And was promptly halted. "That is, I wanted to thank you again, for saving me on Therum. That… means a lot to- I am very grateful. If I find out anything about Benezia's involvement with Saren, I will tell you at once."

Shepard peered over her shoulder at Liara. "You're welcome."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the interested, I have a master character height sheet as well as species height headcanons I can share.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Making a slight change with how I write the characters: from now on they'll refer to themselves by their first names in their POV, to help make that narrative distinction. I'll work on retroactively changing that for all past chapters over the next week.
> 
> Also, getting IRL back in order and setting up a good writing schedule. I should *actually* have a weekly update from now - Thursday. :)

Kaidan tapped on the edge of the frame leading to Shepard’s cabin. The doors were open, but he felt he should still announce his presence before barging in since Shepard was off duty and he was approaching her regarding a personal matter and not a professional one. Especially since he discovered Shepard was nose-deep in a book, legs crossed as she sat in the chair at her desk. It wasn’t his place to think of her as adorable, but that didn’t stop the thought from floating to the forefront of his mind like a stray wisp in the wind. After a few moments, she glanced up, tucking a finger between pages to mark her place as she gave him her attention.

“Good book?” he asked as he stepped inside.

Shepard frowned, casting her eyes back at at the book still in her hands, lifting it up as if it were evidence in an investigation. “Only time will tell, but I rather doubt it.”

“You uh,” Kaidan waved his hand around around the room, “You in for the night?”

Shepard furrowed her brow as she straightened up in her chair, tilting her head questioningly. “Why?”

The question was elongated, as if she suspected him of setting her up for a trick or something. He _did_ owe her payback for Therum… but he was in that for the long haul. If she saw it coming, then he’d have failed at his goal. Pranks were no fun if the other party saw it coming a mile off, and he intended to catch her by surprise. A task Williams told him was futile because Shepard was a sniper.

“No set up, Shepard,” he promised, “We’re playing a game of kemps and I don’t have a partner. Thought maybe you might be interested?”

She looked at him in genuine surprise, her Commander facade dropping entirely for a few brief seconds. “You want me to play a game of cards with you?”

“And Joker, Williams, Garrus, Tali, Chakwas, and Adams.”

“Not Wrex?”

“I was advised against inviting him after Joker made the attempt.”

“Ah.” Shepard rose from her seat and set her book onto the desk, then stretched. “I’ve never played kemps, but sure.”

He waited for Shepard to reach him at the door before walking out with her. “Premise is pretty simple. Matching card game between two and six teams of pairs. Goal is to get four of a kind and then signal your partner on the sly, without anyone else noticing. Then they yell ‘Kemps!’ to score.”

“What happens if someone else notices the signal?”

“That person has to yell ‘stop kemps’ before kemps is called.”

“What are the rules about the signal?”

Kaidan paused in the mess. “It has to be above the table - other than that, no rules. The subtler, the better.” He smiled at her. “Don’t want people to figure it out, after all.”

“Okay, a secret message between you and me.” She narrowed her eyes speculatively. “Something nonchalant, but not _too_ nonchalant.”

Joker rounded the corner of the mess on his way to the medbay and Shepard clicked her mouth shut. The pilot slowed when he saw them and Shepard straightened like a large cat who’d just caught sight of a small animal. Joker shifted his gaze to Kaidan. “You got the sniper.”

A question he phrased like a statement.

Joker shifted looking to Shepard, and then, without a word, he disappeared into the medbay. Shaking his head.

Kaidan started to speak, but Shepard held up a hand softly against his chest and leaned towards the medbay doors. Head cocked so she could hear better. Kaidan slipped a few steps towards the medbay, making sure they were actually shut before turning back to face Shepard. Then as if they were conspirators, he leaned down towards her and whispered. “The coast is clear.”

She peered around him, then whispered back, “Our signal should be a smile.”

“It can’t just be any smile, though.” Like a grin, a coy smile, a… flirtatious smile. He wasn’t sure he could resist smiling at Shepard.

Shepard tapped her chin thoughtfully, completely oblivious to his internal musings. Which was probably for the best as his cheeks had heated up at the mere thought of smiling at Shepard in a flirty kind of way. “How about…” she finally said, “a small smile accompanied by a small gesture or something. So we don’t mistake any smile for a victory smile.”

“Huh,” he mused, “Okay, like a finger tap on the chin?”

“Too obvious.”

“A wink?”

She stared up at him, expression flat. “Way too obvious.”

He bit his lip, mulling over what kind of gesture wouldn’t be too terribly obvious with a smile, and then Shepard said, “I’ve got it!”

“What?”

The elevator doors opened and both of them turned to face the medbay, standing like identical pillars as they waited for the intruder to pass. Adams simply nodded at them, an amused expression on hi face as he noted their identically crossed arms and suspicious gazes.

Once the engineer disappeared behind the doors, Shepard turned to face him again, stepping even closer than before and barely speaking above a whisper. “Smile and bite your lip. Innocuous, and something we should be able to resist doing otherwise.”

“That could…,” he thought for a moment, picturing Shepard biting her lip and became keenly aware that his gaze had fallen downwards and snapped his eyes back up, “that could work, yeah. I like it.”

“Good, let’s head in and kick some ass.” She took a step forwards and then pulled back. “Are there credits on the line?”

“Officially, no.”

Shepard smiled deviously. “So are we pooling together then or going in separate?”

He… hadn’t thought about that. Joker’d told him about the betting pool, but that was it. “I don’t actually know.”

“Can I ask you a personal question?” Shepard waited for his answering nod before continuing. “How much do you have?”

“Maybe 200 credits?”

She grinned again, managing to include him in the process as if it were them against the world. “Let’s make it 500 combined.”

-O-

“What do you mean we’re doing the game here?” Ashley frowned at Joker as Garrus and Tali pulled up chairs around her bed. “You couldn’t wait one more day for me to get out of this place?”

Joker delicately hopped onto the foot of her bed, then raised a finger in the air. “Tonight was a free night for everyone involved, my dear Williams. No guarantees of a free night tomorrow. It’s happening.”

“You _could_ have given me more warning,” she glared at him. “If you expect my bed to be the table, you better get me another pillow.”

Doctor Chakwas was already on it, though - saving Joker the requisite limping, though Ashley would have enjoyed that aspect very much. Not so much as a ten minute warning. Just Garrus and Tali arriving in the medbay with chairs, followed two minutes later by Joker informing her of the night’s plan. Which she wasn’t against, it was the principle of the matter.

Ashley mumbled a thanks to the Doctor just as Adams arrived, then slapped Joker on the arm. Softly, of course. “This everyone, then? I thought Kaidan was coming?”

“Oh, yeah,” Joker glowered, and Ashley caught Adams sporting a knowing smile, “he is. He got _Shepard_.”

She stared at him. “Fuck.”

“Yes, yes.” Doctor Chakwas said, sitting down near the foot of the bed. “Olivia and Kaidan will kick all our asses and we’ll be properly sore before the night is even half over. Where’s the brandy?”

Adams pulled a flask out of his side pocked and handed it to the doc, and she grinned, murmuring, “Excellent!”

When Adams tried to sit down next to the Doctor, however, Joker flew off the bed. Well, he slid off the edge a little less delicately than he otherwise might have. Flew by his standard. “Gotta sit _across_ from your partner, Adams! No peeking!”

Adams rolled his eyes as he moved to the other side of the bed.

Tali and Garrus took the middle seats on either side of her, leaving the closest seats to the head of the bed open until Alenko and Shepard arrived.

Ashley was already feeling like a chicken on a platter in the center of a table. On display and above everyone else, and slouching would only make it worse, because then it’d be like being surrounded by loved ones on a bed. The situation wasn’t helped by Joker taking his seat at the foot of the bed, either. Sure, the chairs were raised, but she was still a head taller than everyone but Garrus.

At least the turian gave her a semblance of normalcy.

“When do we start?” Adams asked, taking the flask when Doctor Chakwas offered it to him.

“When the lovebirds arrive,” Joker muttered. He glanced at the door.

“When the what?” Tali asked, finally speaking up. Ashley was beginning to suspect the aliens would never join the conversation.

Joker slid his eyes to the quarian. “When Kaidan and Shepard show up.”

“But you called them birds.” Tali looked across to Garrus, managing to make the gesture appear questioning with the way she tilted her head.

“Love birds,” Garrus offered helpfully, clearly separating the words as if Joker had been referring to a species and not a sentiment. Then he, too, shrugged. Unaware of its meaning.

Chakwas was quietly laughing in her seat, eyes closed as she leaned back, and Ashley couldn’t help joining her in amusement. Before anyone thought to clarify the issue and point out that Joker was _joking_ because the Alenko and Shepard were two peas in a pod, the medbay doors opened and the ‘lovebirds’ finally made their appearance. Shepard walking in backwards as she said something to the LT who nodded his head, giving her an ‘I know’ expression before turning her around.

They took their seats, Alenko glancing around, aware there was a joke he was missing. Tali rotated in her seat to look at the Commander as Shepard took her seat next to her and asked, “Shepard, what are lovebirds?”

Shepard shrugged her shoulders. “Two people who are in love. Who’s dealing?”

The whole room was silent for a moment before Tali went, “ _Ooooooh!_ ” and Joker quickly picked up the cards. “I am, Commander.”

-O-

Kaidan snuck a peek over the edge of his cards at Shepard. The round of card exchanges was done and she was gathering up the remainder as part of her position as the dealer. Her eyes slid over his as if sensing him and he raised his eyebrows questioningly.

Also to throw off anyone watching them. So far their _real_ signal was secure and they hadn’t had to change it, though Garrus and Tali had changed theirs every game. The quarian was simply terrible at not being completely obvious. And it wasn’t even the suit. It was the suspicious way she started glancing around when she had four of a kind, all eager anticipation. Or the way she started wriggling whenever she suspected someone else, but wanted Garrus to back up her opinion.

Shepard wrinkled her eyes at him.

That was a no then. Kaidan shifted his gaze back down to his hand. He was only one card away from a four of a kind, he just needed it to show up in the next round of dealing and they’d be golden.

“So-” Chakwas started, but was interrupted by Williams shouting, “STOP KEMPS!” finger held aloft, pointed at him accusingly. Victory smile painted on her lips.

Kaidan shared a look with Shepard and sighed dramatically. “Sorry to break it to you, Chief…” He laid out his hand and Williams bit off a curse.

“That’s real great, Ash. Keep it up and we’ll be out of the game in no time.” Joker scowled at him. “Next time, I get the sniper.”

“No one simply catches a sniper,” Shepard retorted.

Joker whipped his head to Shepard. “Alenko sure caught you. I’ll just do what he did.”

“And what did I do?” Kaidan asked, vaguely aware of Williams slapping Shepard on the arm but not really paying attention as he turned in his seat to fully look at the pilot at the foot of the bed.

Joker shrugged, tossing his cards onto the pile while Adams collected them for the next round. “Probably gave her those puppy eyes or some shit. Irresistible.”

“Why Joker,” Kaidan shared a wry grin with Doctor Chakwas, “I didn’t know you thought of me that way.”

Adams muttered something about making sure that made its way to scuttlebutt.

“You know what I mean, jackass. Bust out those big, sad brown eyes and people can’t say no.”

Kaidan shook his head again. Big, sad brown eyes? He wouldn’t exactly have described himself that way to begin with. There’d certainly been no big, sad eyes when he’d asked Shepard if she wanted to join the game with him. If she’d said no, he’d simply have abstained from the evening.

Williams tapped Shepard on the shoulder again, an amused grin plastered all over her face. “Skipper, I think Joker just called you weak.”

Shepard had an odd expression on her face, barely noticeable - but there it was. Eyes clouded in mystery as she regarded him before whatever the expression was melted off her face and she flicked her gaze to Joker. “Joker, Kaidan didn’t need to use any wiley charms or googly eyes to get me here. Though if you want me to play on your side,” she finger-gun pointed at him, snapping an eye shut for emphasis as she pulled the trigger, “you will.”

Tali muttered, “You shouldn’t make fun of lovebirds,” barely loud enough to hear and he spared a confused glance for the quarian. Chakwas and Adams, however, snorted simultaneously. One delicately so and the other not.

Louder, Tali said, “I don’t think you’re weak, Shepard.”

Shepard glanced over at Tali and smiled. “Thank you, Tali.”

-O-

Joker threw his cards onto the bed with a scowl, while Olivia and Alenko high-fived over their third consecutive victory. Williams slapping their hands out of her face. “Who’s the dealer this round?”

No one had managed to figure out their signal which Olivia was _immensely_ proud of. The others, however, were not so lucky. Olivia caught on pretty fast to Joker’s not-so-subtle attempts to catch Williams’s eye whenever he wanted to make the call. For the Chief’s part, she always quickly glanced around the group before staring at Joker as if she was trying to burn a goddamned hole in his head. Tali was harder, but the quarian had a nervous tick of angling her helmet _away_ from Olivia - as if that would prevent Olivia from seeing her - whenever she made her signal to Garrus. The turian was equally bad at the game, lacking in subtly. Their signals weren’t even bad, they were just bad at presenting it.

None of them were good liars.

Except for Chakwas and Adams. Well, more Chakwas than Adams. Olivia and Alenko were only staying ahead of them in the game because they had a damned good signal.

Olivia smiled at Alenko and waggled an eyebrow as he grabbed the stack of cards and informed Joker that it was his turn to deal. The pilot muttered something under his breath which Olivia decided she was better off not hearing.

The occasional smile at each other, with varying expressions, was the only thing keeping everyone else off the scent. It didn’t hurt that smiling at Alenko came easily. Too easily, in fact. She _liked_ smiling at him, and not just because she was having a good time. The excuse of the game was a good one indeed.

She was really gonna have to work on figuring out this growing… whatever it was. Olivia hadn’t heard back from Kassy after writing a pretty lengthy, albeit confused, message about whatever it was that she may or may not be feeling and how to go about dealing with it. Ending the email with a line about maybe just… _not_ dealing with it. It wasn’t surprising she hadn’t heard back, though, if Kassy was deep in an op. But hopefully Olivia would hear something soon.

The waiting made her uneasy. Though she also dreaded the reply.

“This was a fun game, Joker.” Tali leaned back in her chair, pointedly not looking at Garrus. “Too bad we didn’t win.”

Garrus’s mandibles twitched as he eyed the quarian. “You’re never gonna let me live that down, are you?”

“If you hadn’t called kemps when I didn’t have four of a kind, we’d still be in the running.”

Williams leaned forward between the two. “I think we all know by this point which two assholes are gonna win. But whether or not it’s this game…?”

The Chief winked at Olivia for emphasis.

Out of all the teams, she and Alenko only had two letters. If they won this round, the credits were theirs.

“You gonna deal the cards, or twiddle your thumbs up your ass?” Olivia asked.

Alenko and Chakwas both snorted while Joker gaped at her in indignation. She simply arched an eyebrow at him, proving her point about the thumb twiddling. Maybe even stalling the game in order to prevent an upcoming win.

“It’s not gonna work, Joker,” Alenko said, and Olivia slid her eyes to the Lieutenant, amused that he’d come to the same conclusions she had.

“Twenty-five credits says Shepard and Alenko take the cake,” Tali said, sticking her hand out to Garrus.

The turian dubiously eyed the proffered arm, and Joker finally started dealing. “Make it fifty and you’re on.”

“Well,” Olivia dramatically whispered, leaning towards Alenko across Williams’s legs, “I guess we know whose on our side.”

Williams shoved her knee up into Olivia’s chin, and she prodded the offending leg with a finger. And then was caught off guard by Alenko’s disarming, earnest smile. One of pure enjoyment and it made her feel all warm inside in ways she really _shouldn_ _’t_ because she was his CO and there were regs for gods sake.

Well, a sneaky part of her brain admitted, there were regs against _actions._

-O-

Kaidan stretched his legs out, careful not to disturb Shepard as she’d taken up Adams’s old chair for her feet after he’d taken Tali’s empty chair next to her once everyone had started leaving. Williams had complained about getting whiplash trying to look at both of them, and Shepard had patted the seat next to her, indicating he should move over. Shepard had then scooted her chair closer to his, before usurping the other free chair as a leg rest. Effectively blocking him in.

“There anything left in that flask?” Williams asked, eyes closed.

The flask lay abandoned at the foot of the bed, and Kaidan reached over and plucked it off the sheets. Bumping into Shepard’s bent knee, but Shepard didn’t seem to mind the temporary intrusion or disturbance. “Empty, Chief.”

“Damn.”

“Don’t know if you should have more anyway,” Shepard said, leaning back to look up at Williams despite the fact that her eyes were still closed. “Chakwas might kick my ass if I let you get drunk while you’re still in medical.”

Williams mumbled, “Nothing wrong with a good buzz, Skipper.”

Skipper. That was a nickname Kaidan hadn’t expected to be associated with Shepard, yet the Commander had embraced it. He’d tried it out in his own mind, rolling it on his tongue, but the name didn’t suit her coming out of his mouth.

Kaidan fingered the flask still in his hands. “Who does this belong to?”

Shepard looked at it and shrugged, and Williams finally opened an eye. “Adams brought it. Pulled it out when the doc asked where the brandy was.”

“Ah,” Kaidan set it down next to Shepard’s boots, putting it out of his mind.

Williams closed her eyes again, settling deeper into the bed. “What are you two assholes gonna do with your winnings?”

“I didn’t think that far ahead,” Kaidan admitted.

Which was the truth. He hadn’t considered that they’d not only win, but completely wipe the floor. They’d made an effective team. A _really_ effective team. And not just in the competitive sense, though both of them had a competitive streak to rival each other, but in the fun sense as well. Shepard had let her hair down, figuratively speaking, for the game.

“’Cause I have an idea,” Williams said.

The way she said it made Kaidan’s hackles rise, like she was up to something. The sly little smirk tugging on her lips certainly didn’t prove otherwise.

Williams opened her eyes again and pointedly _didn_ _’t_ look at Shepard. Kaidan spared a glance for the Commander, who’d narrowed her eyes as she looked at Williams.

“I had an… observation a few days ago, LT.”

Shepard’s eyes narrowed further and Kaidan leaned forward in interest, his arms brushing up against Shepard’s propped up leg. “Sounds like dangerous territory, Chief,” he grinned.

“Oh, it is. I’m liable to get a boot up my ass as soon as I’m out of medical.”

Shepard opened her mouth to say something, reaching up a hand to interrupt Williams, but Kaidan intercepted the digits. Gently pulling her hand back down to her lap as he said, “Hush, I wanna hear what she has to say.”

This had payback potential. He could feel it.

Kaidan pretended to not hear Shepard murmur about being perfectly able to shove a boot up _his_ ass.

Williams sat up in the bed and leaned forward conspiratorially, and Kaidan felt Shepard try to raise her hand again, so he maintained his firm grip around her fingers, keeping the hand pinned to her leg. When she attempted to pry it loose with her freehand, he grabbed that one, too, and nodded at Williams to continue.

The Chief cupped her hand around her mouth, angling her lips away from Shepard as if that would prevent the Commander from hearing what she said, and stage-whispered, “Shepard wears a onsie to bed.”

His jaw dropped and he couldn’t help staring at Shepard, who’d started blushing. Just picturing her in something so cute… his brain was having problems processing anything _but_ that image. “That’s… adorable.”

Shepard finally managed to pry her hands free of his and, with her new found freedom, poked him in the ribs. “Call me adorable one more time, let’s see what happens.”

“No, Skipper,” Williams interjected, “Adorable is absolutely the right term here. You in that fucking N7 onsie is the only thing getting me through this bullet wound.”

Shepard flung herself back in her chair.

“Like a fucking teddy bear,” Williams continued. She fell back against her pillow again, a smile on her lips.

Kaidan was still having a hard time processing the information. Payback potential was definitely there, he was sure of it, but that wasn’t the aspect he’d latched onto at first. His brain, in its infinite wisdom, had painted an exceptionally vivid picture of Shepard wearing a form-hugging onsie, the zipper not quite all the way up… he flushed and looked away, before either women could catch his expression. Chastising himself for immediately jumping to _that_ conclusion.

He couldn’t deny that he found Shepard attractive, and not just in the ‘you’re pretty’ kind of way, but in the… well, he really shouldn’t finish that line of thought if he wanted to keep his job.

But then there were moments like this, catching Shepard’s pink cheeks out of the corner of his eye, and those barriers became a little fuzzier.

“So what’s the idea?” he finally asked.

Williams answering smile lit up her whole face. “A matching one.”


	21. Chapter 21

Olivia woke up in a cold sweat, heart pounding in her chest and a strangled cry in her throat. She wasn’t sure if she’d _actually_ screamed aloud but she certainly had in her dream. Too many screams in her dreams, not all of them hers. People she knew, people she didn’t, all assaulting her cortex like a fucked up slideshow of the most horrific things her brain could mash together. Her pajamas stuck to her skin, damp and unpleasant, and she tore the zipper down both in an effort to remove the discomforting sensation of hot-yet-wet garments and to help herself breathe. As if her clothes were strangling her. She threw the blanket to the ground and shoved the onsie down to her waist.

_Just breathe_ , she told herself. Breathe, calm and even.

She squeezed her eyes shut.

And immediately opened them when the all-too-vivid stuff of her nightmares painted themselves across the back of her eyelids. Smoke and dead bodies. Screams of terror abruptly cut short. She couldn’t breathe it was so thick.

The beacon had really fucked her unconscious up - and _that_ already had plenty to give her regular nightmares. She didn’t need the dread-inducing, wake-you-up-in-a-state-of-panic kind. The silent whispers of a dead civilization or whatever the fuck the beacon had dumped into her brain. That analysis could wait for a time when she _wasn’t_ freaking out.

She was about to slip over the knife’s edge of barely contained self-control, sitting on a precipice where one stray breeze would send her toppling. She needed to reel herself in. Except nothing was working and her breath started picking up again, so she pushed off the mattress just to _do_ something and crossed the room to her dresser. She tied her onsie off at the waist as if it were a jumpsuit instead of pajamas and shoved her arms through the first tank top she could find. Leaning against the dresser for stability.

She was shivering, but not from the temperature in the room. God, she hadn’t had a nightmare this bad since the first few weeks after Elyisum. Except now her only excuse was an old-as-ass Prothean beacon, which most people would dismiss as a shit reason. She couldn’t stop seeing people she knew twisted into strange husks, their faces warped. Dead bodies accompanied by a lingering dread that was almost worse than active terror. The dread clawed at her, suffocating her, not helped in the slightest by the beacon buzzing in the back of her mind like an angry beehive. Upping the adrenaline in her system as if her body recognized the contents, but couldn’t put words to it. Just… terror.

Olivia raked her hands through her hair. Maybe what she needed was a shower. A nice rinse followed by the hottest cup of coffee known to man to give her some distance from her dreams. Yes, that’s what she would do. Get coffee. Her hands shook as she reached for the unlocking mechanism and she clenched them into fists in a meager attempt of self-control. More breathing exercises followed, the ones she used before going on long sniping missions.

They helped calm her down. Or rather, fake a veneer of calm enough that her fingers stopped shaking and she was able to unlock her own door. Compartmentalization at its finest. She performed another quick swipe of her fingers over her hair to smooth any fly-aways that’d managed to escape her messy bun before exiting her quarters.

She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the lights were still dim in the mess and the glass doors separating the sleeping pods from the the mess hall were still closed. It was still early enough that she might not run into a human being outside of the small night shift, most of whom would be at their stations. Prolonging her chances at some quiet before having to take on her duties.

The last thing she wanted to do was alienate a member of her crew with her current bad mood.

The ship was probably still in FTL back to the relay so they could check out the coordinates Admiral Hackett had sent them to recover an old earth probe. Something to check on if she couldn’t get back to sleep, which was looking less and less likely by the minute.

Olivia padded over to the coffee pot and, after a quick glance around to confirm her sole occupant of the mess hall status, rummaged in the very back of the coffee cabinet for her personal stash. Pulling a face at Kaidan’s canister marked ‘L2 supplements’. She’d meant to ask him why he kept _that_ in the coffee cabinet and kept forgetting as other things stacked up throughout the days and took precedence. Unless he mixed it _in_ his coffee… she pulled another face at the canister, turning it around to see if there was an ingredients list. There wasn’t. Coffee shouldn’t be tainted by such things. It was _sacred_. She’d thought Kaidan had shared that opinion with her.

Fixating on the coffee was a way of keeping her mind off other issues; Olivia recognized the fixation for what it was. It kept the beacon buzz at bay and made her feel a little less out-of-her element to be considering something as mundane as coffee supplements and vitamins. A good distraction because otherwise, her brain would latch onto the dream, lacking something else to contemplate.

“It’s considered polite to ask first.”

Olivia carefully set the canister down and retrieved her own. She hadn’t realized she’d been holding onto it that whole time while… ruminating. “Sorry,” she mumbled and, to offer an explanation that would hopefully suffice, “got lost in thought.”

“A lack of caffeine will do that to you,” Kaidan yawned.

He stepped up to the counter next to her, and she resisted the urge to shy away. To shy away from him and social interactions, and maybe even everything, because the last thing she’d wanted was to run into someone and have to explain herself or engage in morning chatter. She wanted solitude, but she also wanted a cup of coffee for that solitude. Then she wanted to rinse the sweat off her skin, to cleanse herself as if soap could scrub away mental horrors.

She would certainly try.

“So,” Kaidan started, but the one little thin thread of patience she possessed snapped as she caught sight of the smile on his lips and the pleasantness in his voice and good god she couldn’t deal with it at that moment.

“Please, for the love of god Kaidan, not right now.” She squeezed her eyes shut, instantly feeling terrible. “God, I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.”

Maybe she should return back to her cabin after all if she was snapping at _Kaidan_ of all people. The sweetest guy on the whole ship and she’d gone and bitten his head off. And for what? For nothing. He was just being pleasant and she’d reacted like a viper in a pit.

Olivia was not prepared for the warm hand on her shoulder. No fabric separating the contact, just bare skin on bare skin, warm and calloused. The touch tentative, as if he wanted to make sure she was okay with it first before fully committing. And considering the way she’d bitten off her words, Olivia couldn’t blame him for that. She was surprised he hadn’t simply left. It was absolutely what she’d expected him to do: to quietly back away and leave her be.

“Here,” he said, “let me.”

Kaidan gently moved her to the side and set up the coffee pot, getting a cup going for her. His hand vacating her shoulder and she could feel the coolness on her skin where warmth had just been. Guilt tore at her, almost enough to drown out the dread. And there Kaidan stood, solidifying his position as the sweetest guy on the ship. Making her a cup of coffee after she’d treated him like dirt, but god a part of her felt so relieved. The nightmare made her feel like a too-tightly wound coil ready to spring at the slightest release of pressure. But Kaidan’s presence made it seem… less. Like he was solid and here and real, whereas the essence of her dreams were just that: intangible. He emanated steadiness as if it were a pheromone, and she was drawn to it as surely as moth was to the light.

He pressed the cup of coffee into her hands and she stared down at it, unable to meet his eyes. “I’m an asshole.”

“Furthest thing from,” he said and for half a second, she could have sworn he was gonna bump her chin with his fingers to get her to look up at him. “You just apparently had a rough night and you’re allowed to be miserable about it. Stop kicking your own ass.”

“I _snapped_ at you.”

“And immediately apologized.”

She finally looked up at him, meeting his earnest brown eyes. “You’re being entirely too reasonable.”

Kaidan tapped his chest, even though he wasn’t in uniform. “Comes with the job.” He bit his lip. “Want to talk about it?”

She took a sip of her coffee, letting the warmth suffuse her, before answering. “I don’t wanna make you feel guilty.”

“Ah,” he shuffled on his feet guiltily, which made her feel even worse because the last thing she wanted was him blaming himself for Eden Prime, “the beacon?”

“Well, not _just_ the beacon,” she offered to help assuage his guilt on the subject, “Mindoir and Elysium fucked me up good. The beacon’s just playing in their sandbox with newer and better tools.”

She immediately snapped her mouth shut, flushing in embarrassment at the admission that had just come pouring out of her mouth in a spectacularly honest word-dump. She had not intended for it to come out like that, all raw and angry. Like a pulsing wound.

“If you keep looking like a sad puppy, I’m gonna have to hug you, Shepard.”

Olivia gaped at him. “What?”

Instead of answering, Kaidan did exactly as he promised. Having the presence of mind to remove the cup from her hands before enveloping her in his arms while she stood there gaping at him until he pulled her against his chest. The first thought that solidified in her mind was that Kaidan was _warm_. Not just his body, but _him_. All of him. As if his touch exuded an inner heat that could reach through to her soul. He held her stunned in his arms for a few seconds before she tentatively wrapped hers around his chest - and then barely resisted the urge to bury her face against the world and cry.

Oh this was dangerous, this was very dangerous. Yet she couldn’t make herself let go, instead clinging tighter to his chest and Olivia became aware that she’d started shaking again, except this time it was her whole body, not just her hands. Instead of letting go with a pat on the shoulder, official friend hug duty done and over with, Kaidan’s arms cinched tighter around her and he rested his chin on top of her head, right into the mass of barely contained hair. She could stand there all day, letting the warmth of his presence wash through her. Calming her with the steadfastness of his arms, anchoring her with his measured breaths. She used them to guide her own, syncing herself into his rhythm. The effect produced better results than her sniper training ever had. No compartmentalization, just… letting it out. Olivia felt vulnerable yet safe in that vulnerability.

That was all him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eventually, these two suckers are gonna have to talk it out, otherwise one of them is liable to explode. Also, heyoo weekly updates are finally commencing! :D Thursday is the day, my lovelies!


	22. Chapter 22

Kaidan was in a dangerous position.

Not because he was at his post on the bridge about to enter a potential combat zone, though there always existed a certain level of danger being marine deployed on a spaceship. No, that wasn’t what he was talking about. He was in a dangerous position because of him _self_.

More specifically, when he was around Shepard. He’d thought he’d had his… crush? under control. A palpable attraction, sure, and one that had kept him up late a few nights as he attempted to banish thoughts of a less-than-gentlemanly nature. An attraction made worse by the fact that Shepard met all the right check boxes - were he the type to have check boxes - on his potential partner list. If he were the type to have such a list. He’d gotten by with light battlefield flirting, a few not-so-innocent smiles, and only one sad-puppy expression by Joker’s standards - though he hadn’t employed that sucker to get her to play a card game with him. Kaidan had thought for sure that would be enough to see him through the end of… whatever this really was.

For a while, it had.

The danger had set in at approximately 0410 hours when he’d woken up for his shift and found Shepard standing in the mess, one hand on his coffee canister. Hair mussed from sleep and her onesie hanging off her waist where she’d tied it off. A thin strip of skin visible between the bottom of the shirt and her top of her onesie, providing a glimpse of an old scar. Shepard was just standing there and staring at nothing in particular; at first he assumed she was up early for her shift and getting a slow start on the day, probably from staying up late talking with Williams. That was until he’d opened his mouth and she’d cracked like a frozen branch. One look at her eyes told him he’d missed all the cues, if he’d known what to look for beforehand, that she wasn’t up because of an early shift. She was up from bad dreams.

That’s when he started noticing the other signs. The ones he hadn’t seen until he’d shoved his foot so far up his mouth it was a wonder he’d been able to breathe, let alone speak. The sheen of sweat on her skin and the dark circles under her eyes. And then when she looked at him, the _sadness_ that had produced an ache in him so hard he hadn’t been able to think of anything else except for the desire to reach out to her, to soothe the horrors of the nightmare away.

Those kinds of nightmares he remembered well, though he hadn’t had them in nearly a decade.

So he did the first thing that popped into his head, what felt like the most natural thing in the world: he’d hugged her. Shepard had frozen up like startled prey, but then after a few moments hesitant arms snaked around his torso, and she’d started shaking and there wasn’t any way he could walk away from that. He couldn’t get past how _small_ she felt in his arms. Even on Eden Prime when she was unconscious she hadn’t felt that small.

Yeah, he was in danger alright. In danger of becoming the Normandy’s biggest idiot.

“Approaching the relay,” Joker said, shaking Kaidan out of his self-recriminations. “Stealth systems ready to engage as soon as we clear the threshold Let’s hope no one’s watching from the other side.”

Kaidan monitored the comm frequencies and Williams settled into the gunnery seat, bringing the systems online but in standby mode. Alliance intel about what they’d find in the Voyager Cluster was limited, so Shepard ordered combat readiness just in case, but the likelihood of encountering a fishy situation was low.

The relay integrated with his board. “Syncing in progress,” Kaidan reported as the relay aligned itself with its counterpart in the Voyager cluster, preparing the corridor. Data flew across his screen.

“You get the approach vector?” Joker asked.

He nodded in the affirmative. “Just waiting for the alignment to finish.”

Navigator Pressly stood next to his seat, datapad in hand. “Complete planetary data should come as soon we reach the other side. Charts are fairly accurate, but…” Pressly shrugged, letting the action speak for itself. Preliminary data based on charts was good for other side trajectory planning, but the charts were rarely without inaccuracies due to light-speed measurements, or outdated datasets.

“We should be able to locate the signal from the other side, too.”

Kaidan glanced at Joker as the pilot aligned the ship on an approach vector to match the relay’s position. “Not to mention who or what activated it, too.”

“You mean these things don’t just turn themselves on?” Williams interjected.

“Corridor alignment achieved,” Joker said, and Kaidan turned back to his station. “Vector locked, ready for the approach.”

“ _Bring us in, Joker,”_ Shepard ordered over the comm.

Kaidan brought up all his monitoring channels and, after a moment, activated light-speed communications as well. Old tech with old transponders. The ‘mission accomplished’ message had come in over light-speed comm bands and the Alliance had just been lucky enough to pick up the message through an old comm beacon connected to the network in a timely fashion. More lucky that there had been a beacon near the coordinates to transfer the message into the network in the first place.

The trip through the relay was, like all relay trips, short-lived and belly-flipping. As if space were being bent around them and they were catapulted through the tunnel. Over a hundred relay trips in his life and Kaidan still wasn’t used to the sensation. He didn’t know many people that actually _were_ , though a few would claim to be.

The first thing Kaidan did once they were out of the relay was start a comm sweep to pick up the signal. “We are in luck.” Kaidan scanned the data on his screen while ensuring his comm channel was open so Shepard could hear the information, too. “The Probe is in the relay system. First planet orbiting the star… Agebinium.”

“Updating navigational charts now,” Pressly replied. “Once you get a bead on the location of the transponder, I’ll find a drop zone.”

“Make sure it’s at least five klicks out,” Shepard said, marching towards the bridge. Kaidan glanced over his shoulder. “We don’t know who or what activated the probe, or how they did it. I want a good lookout, preferably high ground, where we can stake out the location first.”

“I guess that means we’re not venting the Normandy right away,” Joker murmured.

“We wouldn’t anyway,” Pressly interjected. “Picking up signatures on LIDAR around Agebinium. Not Alliance.”

Shepard leaned forward, entering Kaidan’s peripheral vision. “Can you confirm their IDC?”

“Working on it,” he answered, switching out his comm monitoring panel for ship-to-ship recognition. “None are registered, not even in known Terminus databanks.”

Shepard frowned, as did Kaidan. Whoever they were dealing with didn’t want to be identified. “Take us in slow and easy, Joker.”

 

-O-

 

Kaidan dropped the binoculars and tapped Garrus on the shoulder. “No movements on my end. Yours?”

The turian continued peering through the scope on his rifle. “Not in twenty minutes. This must not be the main entrance.”

“More like a back door,” Kaidan agreed.

Garrus huffed. “Not well guarded.”

Kaidan lifted the binoculars back up, adjusting his position to ease the pressure on his knees. The stakeout place Garrus had found was narrow, barely wide enough for the both of them to fit onto comfortably, and that was without factoring in the sheer drop down one side. The wind had picked up not long after settling in, and Kaidan was beginning to worry a strong gust would suck them over the edge, plunging them to their untimely deaths. They’d been cramped on the small ledge for two hours while Shepard and Tali scouted the perimeter. Kaidan would give just about anything to stretch his legs.

He open his omni-tool and checked a background program he’d set to monitoring ship movements on the planet. The range was limited to a fifty kilometer radius, but it was enough for what they needed. Only one ship had registered a flight path of note. The coordinates a few klicks out. Maybe worth investigating if Shepard and Tali hadn’t already done so, though it didn’t line up with the coordinates they’d gotten off the probe. A quick check on those showed it still hadn’t moved.

“What do you think the plan will be?” Garrus asked, finally dropping his eyes away from the scope to look at Kaidan.

Kaidan shrugged. “Best guess?”

Garrus nodded.

“Two teams of pairs, one to go in, the other to keep watch outside.” Kaidan raised his binoculars to look at the tunnel entrance again. “I’d place a sniper further out to keep watch, while the other sat closer to the entrance. Probe isn’t too far inside the tunnels, if the shot is straight. It probably isn’t.”

“Shepard will want to go inside.”

Kaidan nodded. He’d probably go inside, too, though he didn’t say that aloud. Aside from the fact they were locating an old Alliance espionage probe that contained a nuclear payload, therefore making this mission one of a sensitive nature, he was still the resident bomb expert. Williams had begrudgingly admitted she hadn’t completed the nuclear warhead disarming assessment when Shepard was selecting the ground team, and that she knew next to nothing about the old Alliance espionage probes. Doctor Chakwas had, of course, piped in that she hadn’t cleared Williams for duty anyway.

Kaidan had worked with a few models of old probes in Officer’s Academy, most of which had been retrieved from their respective locations not long after the First Contact War. While he was normally a software guy, he had a knack for wiring configurations that had gone unrivaled until he met Shepard. Even _she_ had admitted that he was better at it than she was, and Kaidan rather doubted that was a matter Shepard would lie about to assuage his ego. Shepard wasn’t the ego-massaging type.

“ _How’s it hanging, boys?”_

“Ready to move when you are,” Kaidan replied. “No movement in nearly half an hour.”

‘ _Main encampment is a few klicks north of our position,”_ Shepard replied. _“Tali and I didn’t get close enough for a solid look. Mountain ridge between us and them.”_

Kaidan peered north, confirming the ridge. That would also explain why he hadn’t seen the ship that had landed earlier.

“Entrance is unguarded. We haven’t seen any sign of a visible shift rotation.”

“ _Alright, meet us back at the Mako.”_

“Aye aye, ma’am.” He clicked his comm off.

The hike back to the Mako took just over thirty minutes, unmarked by anything of note other than lots of dust and stronger winds. Shepard and Tali were already there. Shepard stood at the back with the hatch open, in front of a console. Kaidan stood at attention just off her shoulder while Garrus started fussing over the tank. He relayed in greater detail everything he and Garrus had seen, noting any patterns - which weren’t many - to the movements. Shepard glanced at him when he mentioned the ship, but that he hadn’t picked up any others.

“It was a drop off,” she said. “There’s a base of operations running here. For what, we don’t know. Lots of big crates, though.”

“Weapons?”

“That would explain why they have the probe sealed in the tunnels.”

“Mercs or slavers?”

Shepard shrugged and slid to the side, gesturing for him to join her at the display. “More bad news,” she stabbed a finger at this display, “A wind storm is moving in from the east.”

Kaidan peered at the weather map, watching as it refreshed from data fed by the Normandy’s analytical systems, and noted the size of the cell. A huge sucker that hadn’t yet reached the visible horizon, but was definitely heading their way. “Looks to be a few hours out at most.”

“Gotta time this OP to a T.”

Kaidan peered at the horizon towards the east, shading his eyes against the low-hanging sun. “We won’t want to be caught outside when it hits. Hail, sleet… and not of the pleasant Vancouver variety.”

“My ass is already freezing in this suit.”

Kaidan chuckled. He was a little chilled, but not thoroughly so.

“Garrus, Tali,” Shepard waited for them to form up. “I want you two to take the Mako to here,” Shepard stabbed a finger at the display, “Find a good perch and keep an eye on the perimeter. Tali, I want you to move in closer and watch the entrance. Alenko and I will head inside, find the probe, and retrieve it. Storm coming in hot limits our available time so we make this fast.”

“We could drop you and Alenko off here,” Garrus suggested. “There’s a narrow path-like ridge that’s largely out of view from the entrance till the very bottom.”

Shepard nodded. “Good idea. How are your suits holding up against the cold?”

Garrus shrugged. “Fine.”

“My exosuit is running overtime, but it’s nothing it can’t handle,” Tali replied. “For a few more hours, anyway.”

“If you get too cold, hop in the Mako.”

Tali and Garrus both nodded. “What about you guys?”

Kaidan looked to Shepard but instead of answering, the Commander retrieved two portable thermal heaters. Small enough to fit in their hands and attach to their belts when not in use. She passed one off to him and he clipped it to his belt after a quick battery check. Six hours of constant use, more than enough. It wasn’t so cold inside his suit that he needed it yet, though he was beginning to wish he’d worn warmer socks. His feet would be ice by the time they got back to the Normandy.

Since Garrus and Tali had further to go, Shepard let the turian drive the Mako. Something which Kaidan was quietly thankful for, though he’d never admit it to Shepard’s face. Tali sat in the passenger seat and Shepard had taken up the gun chair, leaving the cramped rear seat squished between storage compartments for him. Under any other circumstances Kaidan might have voiced his displeasure at the seating arrangements. Instead, he opted for a musing how Wrex of all people had managed to fit back here. No wonder the krogan had got into with Williams over foot space. Even Kaidan’s boots were scraping the back of Shepard’s chair, and he wasn’t a hulking giant.

The drop point wasn’t far ahead. Kaidan checked the range of the storm one more time as Garrus pulled up next to the ridge he’d marked on the navpoint. It looked like the thing might just be visible on the horizon. A quick glance one he was outside confirmed his suspicion, and Shepard caught the direction of his gaze. Noting the cell was now visible herself.

Getting to the entrance took a bit more time, but they made it with only minor stumbling on both their parts during a particularly rocky and narrow section. Kaidan had to hold back a laugh at Shepard cursing at the rocks as they slipped beneath her boots and very carefully said nothing when she actually kicked one before it had a chance to sully her footing.

The entrance was just as unguarded as it was when he left it, and they slipped inside with ease but not without unease. Even if this was a back entrance, they should have encountered _someone_. Either that or these mercs were less… industrious than their competition. He shined his light along the walls to gauge the size of the room. A cavern rigged with a few support beams, but nothing extravagant. It was as if the space was being prepped for use, but not currently in use.

The lack of crates, shipping containers, or really anything of note certainly reinforced the concept.

Near the middle of the room, they split up in a silent mutual agreement. All he found on his side were more rocks and a few excavation tools. None of which looked as if they’d seen action in a few weeks.

“Got something,” Shepard hollered, and Kaidan trotted to her position.

“So,” she said as he neared her, peering down a shaft, “I sure hope you like spelunking, Lieutenant.”

“Cave diving was on my bucket list.”

Shepard glanced up at at him, the ambient light from his ‘tool reflecting off her eyes, making them just barely visible through the visor. “Was?”

“Maybe this won’t count,” he grinned, hoping it would translate to his voice, “Might not be very deep. Besides,” he grabbed the rails and stepped onto the first rung, “proper spelunking doesn’t have ladders.”

Shepard huffed a laugh before following him down, giving him a good head start so she wouldn’t step on his fingers. The ladder went deep. He pulled his gun out and shined his light down the passage once he hit dirt. “Still appears empty.”

Shepard hit the ground next to him with a soft _whump,_ having dropped the last few feet. “Rifle won’t be of much use down here. This really where the probe is?”

Kaidan guarded the entrance shaft while she checked her ‘tool, the question more rhetorical than anything. The only sounds were the soft beep of her omni-tool, otherwise it was dead silent. The kind of silence that left a ringing noise in the void. That’s when he noticed his feet were no longer cold and his HUD flashed the temperature shift - still freezing levels, but no longer supremely freezing levels.

“This tunnel must be heated somehow.”

“Maybe we should have left the portable heaters with Tali and Garrus, then,” Shepard joked. “Probe is definitely down here. Closer to this side than the FOB, which means they must be aware of the payload.”

Kaidan holstered his gun. It was clear no one was down on this end, and if anyone _did_ come, they’d hear them a long ways off. “Of course they are. How far off is it?”

“Not… very? My readings are a bit fuzzy, and it’s at an angle from where this tunnel heads.”

“Great. Shall we?”

He almost offered his arm, but held back at the last second, unsure how the joke would play. Or if he’d have meant it entirely as a joke.

For her part, Shepard strode off ahead of him. Light aimed forward and her hand on her holster ready to pull out her side arm at a moment’s notice, and he did the same. Kaidan didn’t imagine there was much that caught Shepard by surprise.

The tunnel was unsettling. Dark and narrow and Kaidan imagined that if the weather conditions were capable of allowing it, the tunnel would be damp as well. It certainly had that vibe. Too many horror movies as a kid accompanied by the ringing silence only broken by their footsteps. After a few minutes Shepard turned on her helmet-to-helmet comm and, at the relief that swept through at him hearing something that _wasn_ _’t_ dead silence marked only by their footsteps, he did the same. He’d never have thought the sound of another person breathing would fill him with relief, but there it was.

“You watch the _Alien_ movies?”

Shepard’s question, spoken low as it was due to their proximity and the open comm channel, still startled him. “No,” he replied.

“Good thing for you,” she said and then tapped the side of her helmet. “Over-active imagination.”

“I _did_ watch _Miners and Changelings_ ,” he offered. Space mining gone wrong, horrors uncovered beneath the surface. And that was _before_ they’d even learned about thresher maws.

“That’s one I haven’t seen.” Shepard was silent for a bit. “Maybe I won’t want to after this.”

“I don’t know, it’s still got a good, if cheesy, love story.”

“Well well,” Shepard cast him a glance and he had the distinct feeling she was smirking at him, “Look who’s a romantic.”

Kaidan waved a hand at her, not dignifying her jab with a response. So what if he was?

“You sign on for the dream?” she asked after it became clear he wasn’t going to rise to the bait, still teasing. “Secure man’s future in space?”

He shook his head and chuckled. “Yeah, I read those books growing up. A man goes out into space to prove himself worthy of the one he loves, all while exploring the stars…” he trailed off. “I may be a romantic, but it’s not why I joined the Alliance.”

“So why did you?” she asked, more serious.

“I just want to do some good.” The words came out more defeated than he’d intended, as if he thought the goal wasn’t entirely possible but he was there anyway. “What about you? Why’d you join?”

Shepard was silent for a bit before answering. And when she did, the words were quiet, like she was offering up a secret part of herself. “To protect people who can’t protect themselves.”

After that a comfortable silence fell between them and Shepard checked their progress against the probe’s transponder every now and then. On the fifth such check, she stopped and said, “We passed it. Didn’t even notice the tunnel veering away from it.”

Kaidan leaned over her shoulder to get a better look at the map, not for the first time wishing they had a proper map of the tunnel system, rather than just what their scanners were able to pick up. Which wasn’t much between all the layers of rock.

“I’m gonna see if we missed a side shaft behind us,” Shepard said, heading back the way they came. “You look ahead.”

He nodded and set out-

-and only made it five steps before an explosion rocked through the tunnel, propelling him forward and he smashed into the side of the shaft, falling onto his side. His hardsuit clanged impact warnings as the diagnostics kicked in and bits of rock rained down around him. His HUD flashed a message: _WARNING: RUPTURE DETECTED IN MAIN O2 LINE_.

Kaidan’s hands flew to his belt, not bothering to push himself up past his knees, searching for his tube of omni-gel, praying it hadn’t been ruptured in the blast. Relief flooded through him when he found it and he quickly assessed his line for damage, searching for the breach. Sealing it when he found it, but not fast enough - he was down over half his supply. The warning disappeared as the omni-gel completed the seal and hardened and Kaidan sat back on his feet and breathed deeply. Shaking off the adrenaline.

His ears were still ringing from the blast, probably amplified from Shepard’s open comm…

Kaidan shot to his feet. “Shepard?!”

The tunnel was dark. _Too_ dark. He should have been able to see the light from Shepard’s tool. She couldn’t have gotten too far down the tunnel, not so far he wouldn’t see her light. He swallowed the rising panic and bile and activated his own, shining light on piles of debris, searching. “Shepard?!”


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who haven't read _Color The Sky_ , my Elysium story for Olivia Shepard, there are a few references to it within this chapter as we're dealing with the War Hero side mission in the first game. It's not necessary to have read _Color The Sky_ to understand the context, however - the salient information is provided in conversation with Haliat.

The blast temporarily knocked Olivia senseless, her head aching and then a rock landed on her arm, pinning her and she shouted in pain. Her ears were ringing and her own shout barely registered. The open comm channel between her and Alenko had magnified the explosive sound and-

-and suddenly she was aware that breathing had become a struggle, as if her lungs were trying to pull in air from a vacuum. Her HUD flashed one warning after the next, a few hardsuit breaches leaking air and exposing her to the elements, her O2 tank had ruptured, and the CO2 scrubbers were offline. She yanked on her arm but couldn’t pull free, and struggling only made her use up more of her rapidly depleting air. She attempted to twist herself to get better leverage, but couldn’t see properly. Either her vision was fading (likely, her O2 was nearly gone) or her omni-tool had been damaged from the rock on her arm. Regardless she didn’t have light, couldn’t see what she was doing, and her time was limited as fuck.

A muted shout caught her attention and she stopped struggling and held her breath to hear better. Her own gasps were clogging up her ears.

“ _Olivia?!”_

Kaidan. She bit back a relieved sob and tried to shout back but there wasn’t enough air for her to do so. Instead she gasped again, trying and failing to draw a breath, her free hand clawing at her throat now, no longer concerned with getting the pinned arm free. She needed to _breathe_.

Suddenly a light was in her face and a blue shape floated above her - and then the pressure disappeared from her arm. Hands grasped at her side, hoisting her up. Now that both of hers were free, she tried to claw off her helmet to get air. Her vision definitely fading and she was sure Kaidan was speaking to her but she couldn’t hear the words over the sound of her own ragged attempts to pull air into her lungs - and then his hands pulled hers away from her helmet before she found the release. And because she trusted him, she didn’t return to the task even though she _wanted to so bad_ oh god, she was going to pass out. Vaguely aware that she was in his lap and he was fussing over her, but good god all she could think about was getting air, any amount of air.

The air filters in her hardsuit hissed and air flowed over her face and Olivia pitched forward as she finally, blessedly, drew breath. Kaidan grabbed her by the waist to prevent her from falling all the way forward, his other hand pushing her back straight to better draw in air, opening her chest and she leaned back into him. Just staring up at nothing and breathing.

“I’ve got you, you’re gonna be fine,” he reassured her.

Olivia blinked hard. She wouldn’t cry in relief, not on a mission.

“How?” she finally croaked out after a long moment of just _breathing_ and then, after a pause, “Thank you.”

“You might want to save the thanks until after I give you the shitty news,” Kaidan said, and she tilted her head back more to look up at him. “My line was ruptured from the blast, depleted half the air supply before I could seal it. And,” he tugged on a cord she hadn’t noticed between them, “We’re linked and living on borrowed time.”

“Fuck,” she breathed. Half his air gone, all of hers gone, and split two ways… six hours, tops. Unless they got to the Mako for a refill.

“Your line was completely gone.”

“Explains the suffocating.”

“Cord is just over a meter in length.”

“And here I was hoping for a free ride.”

Alenko chuckled. “Maybe some other time.”

Any other time, she’d have frozen up at a slip of the tongue statement like that. But not right then. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Lieutenant.”

“You’re small,” he laughed, “I could take you.”

“Let’s see you issue that challenge in the gym.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep, Commander.”

The way he said ‘Commander’ had chills running down her spine for reasons she couldn’t quite articulate. It bridled with challenge, and she found herself wanting him to _actually_ issue the challenge so she could kick his ass. In a friendly manner, of course. All in good fun. Nice, competitive this-is-why-you-shouldn’t-call-her-small fun.

“Current readouts say we have five hours and thirty-seven minutes of air left,” Kaidan said. “I’ve got more bad news. I can’t raise either Garrus or Tali on the comms.”

“Jammer?” she asked, and he shrugged.

Olivia raised her arm and activated her omni-to-HUD suit diagnostics. Her HUD hadn’t informed her of any comm malfunctions… though now that she thought of it, she wasn’t hearing his voice inside her helmet. She sat up straight and twisted as far around as she could without knocking Kaidan over. “Can you hear me in your helmet?”

He shook his head. “I’m still transmitting though, mine wasn’t broken in the blast.”

“I’m not getting anything from you. My whole system must be crapped.”

“Guess that means jammer as my suit diagnostic shows my comm system running fine.”

She ran another program on her ‘tool. Her suit communications might be down, but her omni-tool would work just fine. Except… she came up short. No network, no source to hack. Just a blanket signal. That was old school tech. Kaidan peered over her shoulder, reading what she saw at the same time, coming to the same conclusion as he said, “Broadcaster must be nearby to be getting us down here.”

“Right.” Olivia started to rise, and promptly fell backwards into Kaidan, knocking him over when the cord connecting them caught on his boot. She stared up at the ceiling again as he groaned beneath her. “Maybe we should get up together.”

“That’s a good idea,” he grunted.

And to keep her from moving too fast and risking another collision with the ground, he grabbed her by the waist and she stood up at his pace rather than her own, untangling the cord from his leg in an awkward twister-like dance that almost _did_ see them topple to the ground again. Once they were finally on their feet and tangle-free, she glanced up at him. “That was deceptively trying.”

Kaidan tapped the cord connecting them. “It’s because this thing is in the back where we can’t see it. And more rigid than I expected.”

“That meter doesn’t feel like a meter, that’s for sure.”

He shrugged. “Center of my back to the center of yours…”

“Well,” she said, assessing the damage to the tunnel and opening her ‘tool to pinpoint the probe beacon once more, “this is certainly something I haven’t done before. Tethering myself so intimately to another marine.”

“At least it wasn’t Wrex.”

Olivia snorted hard, laughter bubbling up her throat at the idea of _Wrex_ tethered to her instead. “I think I’d have to sit on his shoulders or risk being dragged everywhere.”

She shined her light down the shaft, grateful her omni-tool hadn’t broken from the rock on her arm, and that there didn’t appear to be any lasting damage to her arm aside from a soreness that said she would feel it in full the next day. The blast had originated close to them, but not _too_ close - and she didn’t know what had triggered it in the first place. No trip-wires or pressure plates that she’d noticed, pointing towards motion detectors. Except neither of them had seen any indication of a visible power grid, which is what she’d have expected given the relatively recent excavation of these tunnels. She scanned the tunnel with her light and Kaidan did the same next to her, scanning the opposite side.

“I think I see something,” Kaidan said.

She looked where he was pointing and squinted. “Let’s check it out.”

It turned out to be a partially destroyed side-shaft. One they hadn’t even gotten to yet. She examined the entrance for any sign of a tripwire or pressure plate, having the presence of mind to tap Kaidan on the arm before kneeling down so she didn’t drag him down with her. Though it was his own fault for being so goddamn tall. Or whoever had designed the cord setup in the first place. It let out at the top of his tank but the intake was on the _bottom._ Not exactly efficient design, and it made him standing and her not standing that much more difficult. Her assessment found nothing, and she didn’t like that. The explosion hadn’t been random, she was sure of it. They were too near it for it to be anything but. Near, but past it, and the only reason she’d gotten caught directly in the blast radius was because she’d ventured back to make sure they hadn’t missed anything.

“The probe is definitely down this way,” Kaidan murmured and she glanced over her shoulder at him, crouched behind her with his ‘tool displaying a map of the area and tracking the probe’s beacon.

“Nothing for it but to keep moving forward then,” she replied.

Olivia headed into the tunnel first, partially because she was smaller but mostly because the nature of their situation worked best if she was in front. Kaidan provided light and covered her with his sidearm while she kept ‘tool out, scanning for traps or sensors so they wouldn’t be caught off guard again.

She was just about to turn around to get an update from Kaidan about the probe when the tunnel was suddenly bathed in light, illuminating a small box-cut room just ahead of them - and the light-source. Olivia frowned, pulling up well short of what she could now see was a either a VI display pedestal or a communications pad. The fact that the light hadn’t resolved into anything as of yet hinted towards the latter.

This time she _did_ turn to Kaidan to confer about device when a human male voice said, “I see someone survived.”

Olivia turned back around slowly to confront the holographic projection of man that had finally resolved. Before she could say anything else, the man’s eyes widened in hatred then squinted in anger. “Olivia Shepard!” he spat, “How very interesting that _you_ are the one the Alliance sent to investigate their missing probe. Oh yes, this was meant to be.” Despite the expressions of hatred and anger, his voice _oozed_ satisfaction. “I thought for sure a mission such as this would be beneath a woman such as you, that the Alliance would not possibly send you… yet here you are.”

He rubbed his hands together in the silence that followed.

“I was in the area,” she replied blandly. The man struck nothing in her memory. Not that that was terribly surprising, she didn’t commit the face of everyone she pissed off to memory. But the way in which he remembered her suggested she ought to know who he was; or, at the very least, what he’d done. Or what she’d done to earn his ire without him earning her recognition.

His face pinched together at her silence, and Olivia felt Kaidan loom closer behind her. A telltale beep of an omni-tool activation and she knew he was scanning for the comm frequency, figuring out how the man was transmitting to them - and maybe getting a bead on their location. All discreetly behind her back, hoping the light from the comm pad would wash out the light from the ‘tool.

“You _ruined_ my career and you don’t recognize me, _War Hero?_ ” the man screamed.“I used to be one of the most powerful leaders of the Terminus Bands until _you_ marched in, a nobody from nowhere, and ruined the biggest operation of my life! _Do you recognize me now?!_ ”

Every cell in her body froze and her blood ran cold. _Elysium._ That fucking day would haunt her for the rest of her goddamn life. Ghosts in her dreams, Kelila, all the people she couldn’t save. And the assholes behind the operation, forever seeking vengeance for all their perceived wrongs and slights. How ironic that this man was raging against her for stopping the Blitz and ruining his life when he’d ruined thousands. So many families torn apart, loved ones killed, others taken.

With every ounce of strength she had, and it took every ounce, she peered over her shoulder at Kaidan, only daring to close her eyes once the man was out of view, and said, “He’s got anger issues, don’t you think?”

Kaidan smiled at her, and it was like a ray of sunshine on an otherwise bleak day. One bright, little ray solely reserved for her and some of the ice inside of her melted at its touch. “I was thinking more ego-maniacal, but now that you mention it, he does look a little… peeved.”

Peeved. A _massive_ understatement, and so befitting Kaidan that she snorted. And the weight on her shoulders lifted again, allowing her to breathe. She could face this. She could face this man behind the Blitz and come out without reopening old wounds anew.

She returned her gaze back to the raging lunatic. “His skin is rather blotchy.”

“Certainly not doing any wonders for his complexion.”

“SHUT UP!” the man stomped a foot on the ground, though the projection cut that part out.

“Shut up, _please_ ,” she corrected him.

If looks could kill, she and Kaidan would have been blasted into ash at the hatred-filled gaze cast their way. “My name is Elanos Haliat!” he thumped his chest rather unimpressively, “When you interfered on Elysium, you ruined my career! Ruined everything I had built for myself and left me with nothing! All I saw for days was _your face_ plastered all over the media. People praising you over and over again, burned into my memory as everyone called you a hero all while I sat in the dark. With nothing.” Haliat smiled, sickeningly, and Olivia’s stomach dropped. “But at least after Elysium, you had nothing, too. Or so I’m told. What was her name? Your dead lover? I heard she died alone in a mortar blast. That you never got to see her or say goodbye. Do you remember this, at least, Shepard?”

Olivia couldn’t have stopped what happened next if she tried, and that sense of powerlessness nearly engulfed her. Haliat raised his hand and the display changed, showing her Kelila’s face just moments before her death and Olivia squeezed her eyes shut, tears welling up against her will as rage boiled inside. Rage that still lingered years later, shut and locked beneath the surface. Just before Haliat hit play, Olivia felt Kaidan grasp her hand, pulling it behind her and out of view from the comm pad as he stepped close enough that she could feel him against her shoulder, and she squeezed his fingers hard through the layers of their armor, hard enough that her hand hurt as she listened to Kelila’s last words one more time. Forcing her eyes open to watch because Kelila always deserved to be seen.

“ _Olivia, I love you, I love you oh my god I-”_

That’s how it ended: abruptly. Kelila running one second, recording her final words - and then nothing. How it always ended no matter how many times Olivia wished it was different; and then the feed cut back to Haliat’s face. “You were fighting a battle you had no business getting involved in, and all she thought about was you.”

Olivia said nothing. This man, above all people, didn’t deserve to hear her talk about Kelila. Didn’t deserve the dignity of a reply, though she knew, she _knew_ if Kaidan hadn’t still had a hold of her hand, she might have risen to the bait just as Haliat undoubtedly so desperately wanted.

“Well now I get my revenge,” Haliat sneered after it became clear she wasn’t going to speak. “Revenge on _you_ , and you can finally join Kelila Theron in death. Then I’ll kill everyone you love for destroying something you had no right to stop in the first place! And finally, I will regain my position as leader of the Terminus Bands!”

Spittle flew off his lips, large enough to display on the holographic projection; it was almost enough to make her lose it altogether. She was already walking a razor thin edge between crying hysterically and laughing inappropriately at the sheer determination the universe seemed to have to throw her up against the people who’d ruined her life as it was. “You really think that’s how it’s gonna play out?” she asked, aware how cold she sounded. “I stopped you once, I’ll stop you again.”

Haliat spat. “And how are you going to do that when you’re trapped in a mine with no way out? I _blew_ your exit, Shepard.”

“You blew one exit,” she replied, “not all of them.”

Haliat’s face contorted in anger. “If I were you, I’d be more concerned about the time.” He tapped his wrist and a count-down flashed over the display: 4:47… 4:46. “I’ve won, Shepard. You just don’t know it yet. Say goodbye to your friend because you’re dying on this rock together.”

And with that, he severed the connection. She wanted to take a moment to catch her breath and calm her nerves, to wipe away the tears from her cheeks, but they didn’t have time for that. And the latter was impossible anyway. “We need to find that probe.”

“It’s just ahead of us,” Kaidan replied. He relinquished her hand to activate his ‘tool, but not before giving her fingers one final squeeze and she drew strength from that small act of kindness.

Olivia knelt behind him as he set to work on the bomb, ducking her face when Kaidan caught sight of the tears still on her cheeks - and the few still welling in her eyes. She offered her assistance when he asked for it, and that was all that mattered in the moment. The courses she’d taken in old tech disarming measures had prepared her for this, but Kaidan was far better at it than she was. Well, _faster_. And what they needed right now was fast.

“I need you to kill the code behind the trigger release so I can disable the timer mechanism.”

Olivia nodded and set to work, opening the panel he indicated to find an antiquated keyboard. She flipped through pages of code on the display, careful to not activate anything that would see them turned to ash, before finally finding the file she wanted. It took her a bit but as soon as she had root access and changed the permissions, she was able to reprogram the file. “It’s done.”

Thirty seconds later the count-down halted at 0:37. Kaidan sat back on his heels, inadvertently dragging her off her knees and he apologized. She shrugged it off as she scooted closer to him.

Olivia really should have been more worried that she _wasn_ _’t_ worried about Kaidan being there to experience one of the most spectacularly shitty moments of her life. And she knew he would have questions, questions she felt he deserved the answer to if he was going to be tethered to her for the duration of what was rapidly turning out to be a personal vendetta against her for her actions on Elysium. But she didn’t have the emotional capacity to open those wounds at the moment, not if she wanted to be able to complete the mission.

At least the tears had dried on her face.

“I’ll debrief you after we complete the mission,” she said. “I know you might have questions now, but I need to stay focused.”

“No.”

She whipped her head up to look at him, taken aback, and Kaidan met her eyes very sternly. “What?”

“As your Head of Marine Detail, a junior officer serving under your command, and your second in the field, you owe me absolutely nothing in regards to your past. I don’t need the details to complete this mission or to know that my trust in you is not misplaced. But,” and he leaned forward for emphasis, “if you want to talk me as your friend, as Olivia to Kaidan and not Commander to Lieutenant, I’m there for you.”

With that said, he started to rise, offering her his hand once he was on his feet, and she accepted it.


	24. Chapter 24

Kaidan crouched next to Shepard, precariously balancing on the small slope and facing away from her so she could reach farther up the ridge to get the merc base in her sights. He had his sidearm out in case a patrol ran into them, but so far they remained undiscovered. Garrus and Tali’s ETA was still a few minutes out as they maneuvered the Mako towards their position, giving them time to get their eyes on the base and for Shepard to determine what their next move should be. Neither of them had long range communications ability - his comm suit hadn’t been as intact as he’d first thought, and his diagnostics hadn’t caught that. Which meant his omni-tool might have taken some damage, something he’d have to sort out later.

Neither of them had spoken much for most of the walk through the tunnels. Kaidan wasn’t entirely sure what to say or if there was anything he _could_ say that would make a difference. He’d already made it clear that Shepard didn’t owe him any explanation she wasn’t comfortable giving; and that the only way he’d be comfortable hearing it was as her friend, not a subordinate. It was the best he had to offer.

He couldn’t shake the way she’d looked at him after he’d said that, either. The storm in her suddenly clearing as she accepted his proffered hand. Blue eyes an oasis of still water, clear as glass. Those eyes were enough to break a man on his best day when they glinted with mirth, but at that moment, they’d carried the mystery of something else he couldn’t quite articulate. If it hadn’t been for those eyes, Kaidan would have thought her silence indicative of offense or him overstepping his bounds. Though he suspected, judging from what he’d come to know of her, that she was more or less struggling to keep her game face on. In her position, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to hold himself together nearly as well.

Kaidan certainly hadn’t expected to see her cry. _That_ made him angry, possibly angrier than he had any right to be, though he could and would judge his own motivations later. Not her tears, of course, or the fact that Shepard was capable of such emotion. But rather that someone had seen fit to purposefully inflict that level of pain on her in the first place.

He also wasn’t sure what to do with the revelation - or even if there was anything he _should_ do - that he’d met Kelila Theron. Only once and they hadn’t spoken personally, but he’d met her all the same. The woman had guest lectured for his introductory comms class in the academy. A pleasant enough person with fire in her eyes; she’d cracked more than a few jokes. Kelila had captivated the entire class for two hours, more than any other lecturer they had for the rest of the year. Kaidan could see why Shepard had liked her, from the little he had to go off of.

He shook his head. Mission. Right.

“Haliat and his men must know by now we’re not dead,” Shepard said, twisting just enough to look at him without tugging him off his feet.

“The mountain not blowing up was probably their first indication,” he agreed. “But whether they know we’ve made it out or not…”

She settled back into position with Gelle Klara and peered through the scope. “Activity doesn’t seem to have changed much. Almost hard to believe this is the man who organized the Blitz.”

“Well,” Kaidan murmured, “If you ruined his career as much as he implied, he must not be able to get the best of the best. This might have taken him years to assemble.”

“Asshole didn’t even have the best of the best on Elysium, otherwise I’d be dead.”

“I rather doubt that.”

“You have too much faith in me, Lieutenant.”

Kaidan chuckled. “I rather doubt that, too. How’s your suit temperature?”

He’d noticed her flexing her feet, probably wriggling her toes to maintain feeling. He was doing the same thing. “Getting a little cold. You?”

“Same. Colder than I’d expect, considering the outside temperatures haven’t shifted much since we entered the shaft, and the storm isn’t yet close enough to be affecting the weather.”

“Corporal Gladstone won’t be happy with us when we get back.”

The requisitions officer was likely to just requisition Shepard an entire new set of armor, Kaidan thought. He eyed the damage to her suit once again: the whole tank had been obliterated, even the one holding the emergency reserves. Her CO2 scrubbers were also damaged, most likely beyond repair, making his work overtime to compensate. He’d barely even managed to fit the hose into her intake port and get air pumping to her before she suffocated to death. An endeavor not helped by Shepard’s attempts to claw off her helmet, though she couldn’t really be faulted for the survival instinct overriding everything else. At least she’d kept her hands down as she gasped for air when he put them at her side.

He’d lost his little heater in the blast and hadn’t known it till they were already half out of the shafts. Too far to turn back and look for it. Now they were racing the clock on two fronts. Freeze to death or suffocate to death. At least if worst came to worst, they’d be doing it together.

“They’re getting ready to clear out,” Shepard said. “We won’t have time to wait for an Alliance Cruiser to come and take them into custody.”

“Orbital strike?” he suggested, already guessing at the answer.

“We don’t know what they have down there, I don’t want to risk it. Even if this isn’t a garden world, the repercussions could be bad for the Alliance - and us - if they have heavy artillery.”

Just as he’d predicted. “We won’t want to chase them into space. Not with the number of ships they have in the system.”

“The odds are not in our favor,” Shepard agreed. “We’re going to have to go in, fast and quiet. Slide on up.”

He did as she ordered and once he was settled in next to her, with only minimal finagling around the connecting cord, Shepard passed him the spotting scope he’d used on Eden Prime. He held it up to his eye and activated the HUD overlay. “What am I looking for?”

“Haliat.”

Kaidan pulled away enough to glance at Shepard. Her eye was still painted to the scope on her rifle as she scanned the base. Shepard must have felt him looking at her, because she said, “I’m not gonna go stupid on revenge, we need to make sure he’s here before we go in guns blazing if we want to shut this op down right. Or report to the Alliance he’s not after we’ve got this base secure.”

She shifted her gaze away from the scope to glance at him and he ducked his head. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Don’t pull that crap on me, Kaidan. Out with it.” When he was still silent, she said, managing to inject the words with an air of eye-rolling as she did, “Permission to speak freely.”

“We’ve got a tough call to make here. I’ve seen what cutting corners can do, and I’d hate to have that happen to you, Shepard. I’m not questioning any decision you’ve made, let me be clear about that. It’s just in my experience when someone lets something slide, it tends to pick up speed. You get my meaning?”

Shepard nodded, still looking at him. As if she knew that wasn’t the full extent of what he had to say. He took a deep breath and continued. “I don’t need to tell you the records from BAaT are all classified.”

Shepard shook her head when he paused, and said, “Because the Alliance made mistakes. You already told me about this.”

“I did, yeah,” he heaved a sigh. He’d told her some things when she asked, sure, but he hadn’t told her everything. And the current situation wasn’t exactly the best time for a heart to heart. So, resolving to go into further detail should she approach him later as a friend to discuss whatever she’d felt necessary to ‘debrief’ him about concerning Elysium, he said, “What Conatix did, and by extension the Alliance, wasn’t best for us at Brain Camp. They didn’t go through the Citadel, didn’t want to appear weak. They cut corners, our teacher, Vyrnnus, cut corners. You either came out a superman or… a lot of kids snapped. Some died.”

Shepard furrowed her brows when he fell silent again while trying to get his wording straight. “So why are you telling me all this?”

He cast his eyes back towards the base, aware he was fiddling with her scope. “The point is when you cut corners, it’s not always apparent who pays the price. When you care about someone, when they’re special to you, well… you try to keep them from making mistakes.”

He chewed on his lip and closed his eyes, willing any god listening to strike him down where he lay. Way to go Alenko, he congratulated himself. There was such a thing as speaking _too_ freely and he’d just gone and done it. At least it was off the record. Small blessings and what not.

Shepard touched his arm. “No cutting corners,” she promised.

Kaidan met her eyes and she seemed to sense his unease, because she said, “I _did_ ask you to speak freely.”

Was she…? Surely not. _Mission_ , he reminded himself.

Her hand slipped away and she returned to monitoring the base down below them and after a few moments where he collected himself, he did the same. Though he could have sworn he heard her murmur ‘special’ under her breath.

-O-

Olivia shifted on her stomach, resisting the urge to check her omni-tool for the umpteenth time. It felt like Garrus and Tali were taking forever to reach their position, an assessment she knew was unfair because they had to cross around the mountain in the Mako, not cut through it like she and Kaidan had. That way was cut off anyway, with the explosion having destroyed their avenue of entrance.

Tali was constructing a jammer on the ride over with whatever parts she could scavenge from the Mako - another reason Olivia was itching to get this under way. They needed the jammer to prevent the base from contacting their ships in the system. She had no illusions about the mercs and their penchant for dropping a bomb on their heads if things looked to be going sideways. Navigator Pressly had strict orders to not engage enemy vessels until Alliance back up arrived through the relay, unless she called in the order. A cruiser she didn’t recognize the name of, not helped by the fact that all the information had been relayed through Garrus to Kaidan and then her. A galactic level of telephone, which she didn’t enjoy.

Not that she was in the best of moods to begin with. That was just the cherry on top of the cake.

Anderson’s words floated to the forefront of her brain from their last private meeting over a week ago: _m_ _ake sure you let him stop you in the future, that one_ _’s got a solid head on his shoulders._ With the ‘him’ being Kaidan - the man squished in so close next to her that she was hyper aware of every little movement between them, as if there weren’t layers of armor separating them. The man who’d talked her down not five minutes ago from maybe committing herself to a stupid action she knew she’d regret, and whose continued presence had a surprising calming effect rather than exacerbating the issue.

And he’d said _when you care about someone, when they_ _’re special to you_ before trailing off and clearing his throat.

Surely he didn’t mean…? Right?

Olivia cast a glance at him again. He was holding the spotters scope to his eye, watching the merc base below them and murmuring field notes into his omni-tool. Like a true nerd. And now she knew the true reason why his mission reports were so detailed.

He must have meant caring for her as a friend. Though she didn’t really have anything for ‘special’. She really couldn’t afford to think otherwise, however, and that had nothing to do with frat regs and everything to do with her personal track record. After all, she was the same woman who’d once said to a friend ‘screw the regs’. Or something to that effect.

She chewed on her lip as she returned to watching the base through her scope. “They’re definitely preparing to move out.”

“Hopefully they passed the message along,” Kaidan said, “and those ships we avoided on the way in are on their way out.”

“Tail between their legs.”

“Wouldn’t be too much to hope they’ll rethink their life choices?”

She cast a glance his way and found him looking at her. “If what you said about Haliat not being able to find the cream of the crop is true, it just might be our lucky day.”

Kaidan snorted dubiously.

“Why are your suits linked?” Tali screeched, and both Olivia and Kaidan jumped. “We’re on a _mission!_ ”

Olivia awkwardly twisted around Kaidan, ending up rolling over his lap as he rolled over so they could slide down their little perch facing the right direction. Garrus was attempting to quietly reign Tali in, but the quarian yanked her arm out of his grasp and stared - Olivia was sure of it despite the tinted faceplate - between her and Kaidan indignantly. “My O2 tank was destroyed in the blast,” Olivia answered.

There was some quarian thing she was missing here, a ritual or something involving suits probably. She didn’t have time for the culture shock, though - not when the clock was running out. Both figuratively and literally. “Where’s the Mako?” she asked, when Garrus handed Kaidan a spare O2 converter. Kaidan immediately set to work hooking it up; until Olivia tapped him on the arm. She had better reach to the slot than he did, and he relinquished it to her capable hands.

Garrus was the one to answer her question as Tali was still staring between them. “Just behind the ridge a few hundred meters back. We didn’t want to raise a cloud of dust.”

“And the jammer?”

Garrus looked to Tali and, having regained some of her composure, the quarian dug around in one of her side pockets. She still sounded strained when she spoke, however. “I have it here.”

Olivia accepted it, examining the quarian’s craftsmanship with no small degree of admiration. “You made this on the ride over?”

Tali nodded. “I know it’s not amazing, but it should be enough to do the job.”

“Are you kidding, this is incredible. Certainly more than I expected to get the job done.”

Tali ducked her head and murmured, “Thank you.”

Olivia patted her on the arm like she would any other marine who’d done the job well, and then redirected her gaze to Garrus. “Any resistance on the way over?”

“Seventeen hours of air now,” Kaidan murmured and Olivia acknowledged the statement with a nod.

“We ran into a patrol who opened fire immediately. Took some hits to the side of the Mako before we managed to take them out. Nothing serious.” Garrus looked at her for a bit. “I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, Shepard, but what’s the plan now? Since we have…”

He trailed off, gesturing to the cord linking her and Kaidan together. She tugged at it. “Since we have this minor complication?”

Kaidan huffed a chuckle next to her and muttered something that sounded dangerously like, “A _minor_ complication.”

“Well, yeah,” Garrus answered. Despite the awkwardness in his voice, he didn’t shuffle on his feet. Just a direct stare as he waited for her answer.

“Kaidan and I will move in close enough for his biotics to be effective should we need them, while I cover you two with our rifle,” she said, and Garrus and Kaidan both nodded, “I’d like to think we could get them to come in quietly, but since Haliat’s idea of diplomacy was to try and blow me up, I rather doubt they’ll surrender without a fight.”

Olivia slid her eyes to Tali and the quarian visibly straightened, ready to defend abilities though that was unnecessary. “Stick to Garrus’s back and cover him with your shotgun.” She looked at everyone on her team and nodded to herself. They were ready. “Your cue is when I activate the jammer.”

-O-

Kaidan crouched next to Shepard behind a flat-ish rock, watching Garrus and Tali as they continued forward. He’d reassured Shepard no fewer than five times that he didn’t need to be as close as she believed in order to do some serious trouble with his biotics. It wasn’t that he believed she doubted his abilities, but rather that most L3s and up, and none to few L2s, weren’t that great at anything beyond fifteen meters and they were camped out at thirty. The situation probably would call for his skills, so he could see why Shepard kept asking. Kaidan had no illusions about what Haliat would do and how that would change their mission. Rather, he had wanted to ensure that Shepard went about it the right way.

And she was.

That shouldn’t have surprised him, and yet it did. But not in the way most people would expect. He wasn’t surprised she listened to him, he was surprised because he honestly believed that she would have done the same thing regardless of his intervention. Angry as she was - and he could tell she was tightly wound with barely contained fury (rightfully so) - she kept it out of her voice, out of her orders, and out of the mission. In her position, knowing he was looking at the person responsible for the death of a loved one, he wasn’t entirely sure he’d be able to do the same thing without someone to talk him down from making such a mistake. It only served to prove how much better she was than him.

Now that Garrus and Tali were out of audible range, Kaidan had another… curious matter to address before the mission was officially underway and he forgot about it. “Our rifle?” he asked.

He very carefully kept his eyes facing forwards on the base. Shepard shifted next to him and the silence became inextricably awkward. Maybe he shouldn’t have said something after all.

“Well,” Shepard finally said, “you did name her.”

“Does that mean we’ll have to split maintenance duties on her?” he asked; and, to diffuse the awkwardness even more, he looked at her, “’Cause I’d rather pay gun support than risk the ire of a sniper.”

Shepard gave him a sly grin and drawled, “You’re off the hook.”

His joke had another side effect: some of the tension bled out of her shoulders. All he could ask for, really. Kaidan reached out and dusted a few of the rocks under Gelle Klara away, causing Shepard to raise an eyebrow at him. He shrugged. “I’m feeling rather parental now.”

She shook her head and muttered, “Incorrigible.”

“Someone’s gotta keep the dents and scratches out of her.”

“You wanna pay gun support after all, pretty man?”

He mimed zipping his lips closed, though the effect was somewhat ruined by the helmet blocking his mouth.

“ _We’re in position,”_ Garrus’s voice filtered over his comms and he tapped Shepard on the shoulder. Both of them slipping out of the easy banter and back into business with practiced ease.

Shepard disengaged her grip from the rifle, still peering through the scope and she held up three fingers, indicating Kaidan should begin the countdown. He counted back from three over the comm, and as soon as he reached ‘one’ Shepard pressed the button on Tali’s jammer. All channels but their encrypted one went down.

Everything happened at once. No fewer than five mercs ran out of the base with bewildered expressions and Kaidan threw them off their feet with a wave of his hand. Meanwhile, Garrus stormed up the side of the building with Tali at his back, blasting a merc who attempted to get the jump on the turian from a side door square in the chest. Kaidan could hear Garrus ordering their immediate surrender over the comms. A few of the mercs obliged, setting their weapons down - or staying on the ground where they’d landed as it were. Shepard had pressed herself close enough to him to hear Garrus through his speaker, and he’d turned the volume up on her behalf. Aware he’d regret that later, but her hearing mission details was more important than him avoiding a migraine.

It looked as if they might be able to get out of this with only the one shot fired, but then a grenade flew out of the base. Too small for him to catch in a precision field, and too close to Garrus and Tali to risk a generalized sweep. The mercs who’d surrendered scattered fast and Garrus threw Tali and himself to the ground, covering their heads, allowing Kaidan the chance to at least erect a barrier in front of them, protecting them from the brunt of the blast. Instead of letting the field go so it could decay naturally, Kaidan maintained it. Sweat popping out on his brow despite how he cold he was because of the expended energy.

Shepard kept her rifle trained on the entrance, thumbing a button on the side of her scope. The grenade exploded - and then she fired. The gunshot reverberated through her and translated to him.

Garrus was on his feet as soon as the rapport of her rifle echoed, gun up and out, covering Tali as the quarian regained her footing and Kaidan finally released the barrier. The mercs had left their guns behind, though an unlucky few had been caught with shrapnel in the back.

Shepard fired again. Thermal sensors on her gun undoubtedly aiding her in her targeting. Garrus and Tali moved towards the entrance and Kaidan gave them the all clear over the comm when Shepard pulled away from her rifle. A few bursts of gunfire over the comms and then Garrus said, _“It’s done.”_

-O-

Olivia stared down at Haliat’s body. The slug from her rifle buried in his chest. Whether it was her first or second shot didn’t matter. More grenades lined his belt and he had a timer in his fist. Ready to blow something to high heavens. She wouldn’t have put it past him to target the whole damn mountain.

“Good call against the orbital strike,” Kaidan said. He was kneeling next to Haliat, examining the timer. “You got him before he could activate it.”

She didn’t say anything. Didn’t trust herself to speak and, as if sensing her problem, Kaidan stood up and turned away to give her as much privacy as he could under the circumstances. Olivia closed her eyes and breathed, letting go of the last vestiges of rage and fury that still bubbled in her after all these years. Even after all this time, the wounds still hurt and she suspected they would always hurt a little, but she hadn’t fully realized just how much she was holding in until she saw Haliat lying there on the ground, dead.

“At least I did one thing right by you,” she murmured. Picturing Kelila’s face. “Too little, too late, but there it is.”

Kaidan shifted on his feet, letting her know as discreetly as possible that he could still hear her. She didn’t mind. He’d already seen the worst, watching Kelila die. Regardless of whether or not he knew her didn’t matter. He’d still born witness to the last moments of someone’s life. A life that had ended abruptly and violently.

Olivia was more controlled this time, not crying as she stood there and stared at the man who’d nearly ruined her life. Keeping herself controlled as reinforcements finally arrived and Alliance clean up crews took command of the situation. Didn’t cry when she and Kaidan finally made it back to the Mako, and then the Normandy. Didn’t cry during the debrief, nor during her routine medical check up after the mission.

It wasn’t until she was alone in her cabin and she’d locked the door that the floodgates opened and she broke down. Falling to her knees as soon as the mechanism engaged and the tears spilled down her cheeks. A sob tore threw her, loud enough to carry but she couldn’t muster up the necessary willpower to silence herself as years of pent up grief threatened to consume her. She cried herself to sleep, holding her pillow close to her chest. Wishing against wishes that someone was there to wrap their arms around her as she clutched the pillow tighter, because she was so tired of being _lonely_. So tired of having loved ones torn from her and constantly losing the pieces of herself she’d so freely given away to destruction.

 


	25. Chapter 25

Ashley meticulously aligned the instruments on her bench, casting a glare around the bay. _Some_ one had fiddled with her bench while she was hitting the head, but the perp was nowhere to be seen. And they’d done it the last few minutes of her shift to boot! She wasn’t good enough at reading Wrex’s mannerisms to determine if he looked guilty or not - but then, he kept his weapons to himself. No reason to fuss with her bench that she could see, and he’d never gone near it before. The krogan was relatively reclusive compared to the rest of them. Ashley wasn’t sure if that was a Wrex thing or a krogan thing; she hadn’t meant enough members of the species to form an accurate opinion on the matter.

She crossed him off her list.

Alenko and Shepard, the last she’d seen, were both in the CIC for their shifts; though Alenko wasn’t on the comms board, affording him greater mobility. Yet, she reluctantly admitted, Alenko had followed her listed rules to a T. Just as Shepard had said six days ago. Not a thing out of place. He usually left her a message, too. When Shepard, on the other hand, came down and started touching stuff, she typically only fussed over her rifle, only using tools she needed for the job. And she _usually_ put them away. The rifle cleaning gear remained untouched.

No, whoever had desecrated her bench had been in and out like a bandit.

Ashley grumbled to herself, and began noting every tool that wasn’t where she’d left. Two disturbed rags but only one used, and not for gun cleaning by the smell of it. She picked it up and lifted it to her nose. It smelled… tangy. Sharp. Definitely not used on anything gun related, nor by any of her standard gun oils, which meant this towel was scrapped. Ruined. She tossed it into the wash bin with a huff. _That_ would offset her cleaning regimen, and she was very particular about that. Her lips thinned as Ashley returned to her bench and examined the rest of the disturbed contents. A few shifted tools, though some of those could have been disturbed by getting the rags as the bin was out of place.

She glared around the room again, transferring her stare to Alenko exited the elevator shaft with a datapad in hand, heading her way. He slowed in his approach when he finally looked at her, eyes flicking to the bench knowingly. Maybe he was the guilty party after all, she mused.

“Someone touch your stuff?” Alenko asked, coming to a stop just the other side of her work table.

“Yeah,” she grumped, “what do you need?”

“Social call,” he replied, “well, sort of. We’ve docked with Arcturus.”

“And?” she prodded when Alenko didn’t say anything, staring off into nothing. She resisted the urge to wave a hand in his face for emphasis.

“Oh,” he gave his head a small shake shake, as if clearing his mind, “everyone gets thirty-six hours leave once Shepard returns from her debrief with the Board. If you have an apartment, you can stay there for the night. If not, Alliance temp housing has rooms available for anyone who wants a real bed instead of a sleeper pod.”

“Sounds good.” A real bed would certainly be nice. “Who do we go to for that?”

“Navigator Pressly is compiling a list of crewmen who need a room.”

Ashley nodded, making a mental note to seek the XO once her shift was done. Any chance at avoiding the sleeper pod was a chance she’d take. She hadn’t realized how _cramped_ the damn things would feel and almost, _almost_ , wished she was still planet side, if only for the bed. Getting used to the pods was… an endeavor. Certainly not one she’d particularly enjoyed the past few weeks, though at least now it only took her thirty minutes to fall asleep instead of an hour.

Alenko still hadn’t left yet, either. Spacing out again at nothing in particular. “Got something on your mind there, LT?”

He fidgeted, his right hand ghosting towards his left before pulling away. “An omni-tool… problem.”

Ashley’s hands were up before the words were even out of his mouth. “I don’t fix those. Talk to Shepard or Tali.”

Alenko gave her a flat look. “I’m not asking you to fix my ‘tool, Chief. I already junked it. I’m just trying to decide if it’s rude to buy a new one when someone gave you their old one.”

“Someone being Shepard?”

Alenko flushed, the color spreading through his cheeks and down his neck before disappearing down his collar, and Ashley raised her eyebrows. Well, well… it appeared scuttlebutt wasn’t wrong on _that_ front. The LT was definitely sweet on someone - and now she knew who that someone was. Oh what Joker would pay to learn this little fact first. Ashley filed the tidbit away for later, gave Alenko her best ‘mom’ expression, and said, “If you’re so worried about offending Shepard, take her shopping with you. The way she’ll nerd out over everything in view will more than make up for you returning her old ‘tool. In fact, I wager Shepard browbeats you into buying one as soon as you say ‘omni-tool shop’.”

Alenko chewed on his lip and nodded.

“You need anything else, LT?”

He handed her the datapad in his hand. “Doctor Chakwas has officially removed you from your light duty restriction.”

Ashley whooped as she accepted the pad, only bothering to skim the contents to make sure Alenko wasn’t pulling her leg. Not that she suspected him of being malicious, but she was still feeling a little more paranoid than usual. What with the mystery of the bench-ninja disturbing her things.

“So who did it?” Alenko asked.

Ashley shrugged. “In and out, knife job. I’d suspect Shepard because of the speed, but she’d leave a bigger mess.”

Alenko had already started shaking his head as soon as ‘Shepard’ was out of her mouth. “Shepard’s not aboard ship.”

“Rules out Pressly then. Acting CO and all. Probably Joker, too.” She glanced at the datapad again. “I guess Doctor Chakwas as well, since you were with her; and maybe you, too. Only solid evidence I have is a soiled rag.”

Alenko’s eyebrows threatened to climb off his head when Ashley bent over to retrieve the rag from the bin. He tentatively accepted it when she handed it to him before smelling it, keeping an eye on her as if she were up to something. Then he raised his eyebrows for another reason: _recognition_.

Ashley swiped the rag from him and waved it in his face. “Who?!”

“Only one person on the ship who uses this cleaning oil,” Alenko said. The bastard was drawing it out, clearly enjoying himself, judging from his expression. Ashley thinned her lips in impatience, tapping her fingers against the counter top. “Liara. Its a biotic implant cleaning oil; she uses a scented brand.”

Ashley looked back at the rag, furrowing her brows. She didn’t know a lot about biotic implant maintenance. Hadn’t even been around one till she met Alenko. “Will it damage my guns?”

“No,” Alenko laughed, “it won’t. Just… catch her up on the bench rules before you bite her head off.”

Ashley grumbled as Kaidan walked away. Then she tossed the rag back into the bin. Biotic implant cleaning oil. She should have figured, what with it being so foreign. Shepard used a different oil for her rifles, but Ashley was familiar with that one. Familiar with Wrex’s, too, even though the krogan never let her near his guns. Garrus was fine with the Alliance standard oil - and didn’t mind her touching his sniper rifle, though he always calibrated it after she cleaned it. Taking entirely too long with the process if anyone asked her opinion.

Once her bench was back in order, she moved to her locker and retrieved a piece of paper, a marker, and some tape. In large, blocky letters, she wrote: _DO NOT USE GUN RAGS FOR BIOTIC IMPLANT MAINTENANCE_. As an after thought, she added a line underneath: _See separate bin labeled_ _‘implants’_. Satisfied with her handiwork, she taped the sign beneath her bench rules sign.

She still made a mental note to talk with the good doctor scientist. Passive-aggressive messages weren’t really her thing for getting a point across - she just wanted to ensure everyone knew the rules and the mistake wouldn’t be repeated in the future.

And to keep her word, she set up another smaller bin, labeled it ‘implants’, and transferred a few rags into it. She’d have to readjust her regimen to account for the rag loss, but she’d make do. Better to take care of her biotics and their needs than have them stealing her stuff in the dark of night. Her bench was probably the best place to do that sort of thing other than the medbay, provided Doctor Chakwas allowed the invasion; the doc was touchy on that subject during normal operating hours.

Though, she hadn’t minded the ground team invading for a card game in the evening. Of course, there also hadn’t been a threat to anyone on the ship at the moment, thus no work for the Doctor to complete.

Ashley glanced at her ‘tool for the time. Once her shift ended, she planned on seeing Pressly about the room accommodations, mapping out a few gun shops for recreational perusing, and then changing into her civvies.

-O-

There were many things Ashley had come to expect in the short few weeks she’d been aboard the Normandy, things most people wouldn’t normally expect under other circumstances or while serving on other posts. Like a strict Doctor who kept a bottle of brandy in the back of her cabinet, sharing a sip or two with a few marines off the clock. Or the supremely efficient alcohol still Tali had helped to engineer and which Shepard had given a two thumbs up upon discovery. Ashley was sure Adams was still shitting himself after finding the Commander rooting around the tubing early one morning. And then there were the missions; Ashley was used to fighting rogue AIs as if they were common mercs on a ship lead by a Spectre choosing her own missions and being asked by the Alliance to complete other assignments on the side. Not ordered.

However, when she walked into the mess hall after having changed into a pair of jeans and a sweater for leave, she had not expected to round the corner to see Shepard standing there in a cute, little green dress, though she still wore her combat boots, and a jean jacket.

The Commander looked positively stylish. Even the boots worked, though Ashley had a feeling Shepard would have worn them regardless.

Ashley pulled up short and touched her palm to her forehead. “Am I hallucinating, ma’am?”

“No.” Shepard poured herself a cup of coffee. “But I can fix that if you like.”

“Definitely hallucinating,” she replied, and Shepard gave her a flat look.

“It’s just a dress, Williams. Not the end of the world.”

Ashley stepped close enough to Shepard to poke her in the ribs, which she did. The Commander arched an eyebrow at the touch, but did nothing else. “Satisfied?”

“I’m gonna have to get a second opinion on this.”

“Second opinion on what?”

Ashley glanced over her shoulder to see Tali entering the mess hall. “Shepard’s dress.”

Tali peered around Ashley and said, “I think she looks very pretty.”

Shepard snorted and poked Ashley in the ribs. “Face it Chief, you’re the only one weirded out by my choice in attire.”

“Not weirded out, Skipper. Just wondering if I’ve walked into alternate reality. You got a date?”

Tali joined them at the counter, leaning against it next to the Commander. “Why would she have a date?”

Ashley was going to have to ask the quarian how she managed to inject her body language with so much emotion and thought, because the quarian’s position managed to convey confusion and curiosity at once. Something, she imagined, most quarians had to learn considering the exosuits.

“I find your confidence inspiring.” Shepard tossed back the rest of her coffee as if it were a shot and set the cup down. “Both of you.”

Tali shifted her inquisitive gaze to Ashley as Shepard moved past them, and Ashley felt distinctly like an older sister being assessed by the younger one. A feeling she was used to, sure, but not from present company.

However, before Tali could give voice to any question on her mind, Alenko rounded the corner into the mess. Still wearing his fatigues, though he had a bag slung over his shoulder. “Has anyone seen Shep- _oh_.”

Tali squealed, slapping her hands to her helmet as if covering her mouth in delight, “Oh, I guess it _is_!”

Ashley quickly grabbed the quarian by her arm and yanked her away from the counter with a quietly hissed, “Shh!” just as the Commander turned back to look at them. A frown on her lips and her brow furrowed. Ashley knew that lovebird thing was gonna come back to bite them all in the ass, but no one had wanted to correct the quarian in the moment because correcting her would have meant presenting both Alenko and Shepard with context. That just would have been embarrassing for all of them. Especially in light of the little nugget of intel Ashley had learned earlier in the day.

There was no need to unnecessarily embarrass the LT in the present moment, though. Ashley threw her arm around the quarian’s shoulders, noting Alenko’s completely infatuated stare directed towards the Commander now that she knew what to look for, though Shepard missed it entirely as she narrowed her eyes at both Tali and Ashley, and said, “What do you say I give you a tour of Arcturus?”

Tali fidgeted but complied with the direction Ashley pulled her in, exiting the mess with a wave towards Shepard and Alenko. “Okay…”

Ashley rambled about Arcturus facts as she hustled them both up the stairs to keep Tali from saying anything incriminating within earshot of the LT and the Commander, hustling them away from Shepard before she could think to stop them. Which was a shame because Ashley would have killed to see how _that_ encounter resolved itself. It’d be the wards foot-in-mouth situation all over again, but dialed up to ten. Alenko had it bad if the mere sight of Shepard in a dress was enough to make him trip over his own words. Hell, not even trip - completely forget how to form them as his tongue unraveled itself in his mouth.

Once they were through the airlock, Ashley finally halted and let go of Tali. “You know Alenko and Shepard aren’t actually dating, right?”

Tali shook her head, tilting it to one side. “But-”

“No no, the lovebirds thing was a joke. Joker didn’t mean it _literally_ , he was commenting on how closely-minded the two of them are. Two geeks in a pod.”

Tali stared at her for a moment in disbelief. “But they _act_ like a couple around each other!”

Ashley opened her mouth to negate that fact - but the words wouldn’t come. The more she thought about it, the more she realized they _did_. Sort of. A lot? … Maybe scuttlebutt didn’t have the whole truth of the matter after all. Come to think of it…

“I _knew_ it!” Tali exclaimed. “They _are!_ And you’re covering for them! Oh is it forbidden?”

Tali positively swooned.

“If they are together, they’re the best damn liars in the whole Alliance. No,” Ashley mused, feeling a little guilty at breaking the quarian’s idealistic approach to the perceived romance between Alenko and Shepard, “they might like each other, but they’re not an item. So you probably shouldn’t refer to them as such. Especially to their faces.”

Ashley resumed walking, Tali following close behind. “Isn’t it romantic though?” the quarian gushed, “It’s just like Dallius and Ilexa in _Finding Their Pilgrimage_. Love at first sight, but kept apart by a rogue AI. Confessions of love, secret kisses, espionage! Just like this!”

Ashley gaped at the quarian. “I can’t say I’m familiar with that movie.”

“I’m sure we can find a copy of it aboard the station,” Tali replied, “Or maybe a showing!”

Before Ashley could object, the quarian had her ‘tool out, checking local show times. Ashley squeezed her eyes shut and prayed the answer came back negative. Not that she didn’t want to spend time with the quarian, she just didn’t want to go watch a romance movie.

So before Tali could get far in her search, Ashley said, “Actually, I was thinking of checking out a few shotguns.”

That got Tali’s attention, and Ashley grinned. 


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where we finally meet Kassy and Kaidan buys a new omni-tool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One day late this week! I started my new job last week, and the training started this week in earnest - I've been pulling long hours adjusting my schedule and couldn't get this out on time, unless I wanted to post an unedited pile of garbage. You guys deserve better than that, though! We should be back on for normal now that I'm learning to readjust how I think about my free time. Next weeks chapter will either come out a day early or a day late, as I'll be traveling to Seattle for Geek Girl Con Thursday night after working an extra shift that day. Hopefully the former! I'll keep everyone posted on my blog.

The docking manifest indicated the Metaurus should have made port thirty minutes prior, yet Olivia still stood in the docking bay, two coffees in hand growing colder by the minute, waiting for the Metaurus to finally be queued in for its approach. It’d been a pleasant surprise when she’d glanced at the list of incoming ships that day to see the one her best friend was posted on arriving shortly after the leave she’d granted her crew begun. Olivia had parted ways with Kaidan and Garrus after seeing the manifest, lamenting their trip to an omni-tool shop so Kaidan could purchase one of his own without her. But not so much she’d give up seeing Kassy.

Kaidan would undoubtedly purchase the latest logic arrest omni-tool model if she knew him. He’d all but gushed over the specs when he’d first brought the matter up that morning.

Olivia felt moderately guilty that she’d been preoccupied and had had to ask him to repeat himself when he asked her if she would be offended at the return of her ‘tool. It wasn’t his fault, it was _Williams_ _’s_ and _Tali_ _’s._ She still wasn’t sure what to make of that interaction, other than Williams had had a sheepish expression as she tugged Tali away, refusing to meet Olivia’s eyes.

So once Kaidan had repeated himself, and she’d apologized for her lapse in attention, she’d immediately started shaking her head. Oh, she wanted him to get a new ‘tool alright if that’s what he wanted, but he’d tried to give the damn thing back to her right then. Without having a replacement. As one tech to another, she couldn’t let him to do that - and she made that point clear. He could return the gifted ‘tool ex post facto if he so wished, but she didn’t need it back and it certainly wasn’t a requirement should he find what he was looking for. Olivia had suspected he’d eventually get a new one anyway, but couldn’t in good conscience let him settle with a blue wire in the interim - and that’s all the requisitions officer had in stock. Which was why she’d given him one of her old ones in the first place, even though it was a savant and not what he was used to.

Still miles better than a blue wire. Olivia shuddered to think of using a blue wire herself.

The Metaurus finally slipped into view of the bay and Olivia straightened, readjusting the coffees in her hand. Both lukewarm, but it was the thought that counted, right? Not her fault the docking schedule was crapped.

After a quick juggling of the beverages, she activated her ‘tool with voice controls and sent a message to Kaidan: _you get a new omni-tool yet?_

Kassy would probably be one of the last off the ship. Newly promoted XO, though she had to formally accept the position; Olivia suspected this was the official point at which the former XO would retire. Dropping him off for the ceremonies, instating Kassy in his place. A position well-earned, if anyone asked Olivia’s opinion.

Her ‘tool pinged with a reply. _Still browsing. Garrus abandoned me when we passed a rifle range. Apparently there_ _’s a sniping challenge going on and he saw your name on the leader boards._

Olivia chuckled just as the airlock ramp seals hissed and clicked into place, signifying a successful dock by the Metaurus into the bay. Pressurizing the docking arm, she wouldn’t have to (hopefully) wait too much longer. Her ‘tool pinged again and she glanced back down. _Williams wants us to meet her for dinner at Cafe Confidante, 1800 hours._

She checked the current time. Since this was an unscheduled stop, it was likely Kassy would have plans or be busy with the retirement ceremony. A dash and drop stop. So the dinner time should conceivably work for her… but just in case, she said: _Pencil me in as a maybe. Not sure of my friend_ _’s schedule yet._

The airlock doors opened and Olivia glanced up. The coffees were now officially cold. Thirty seconds later, crewmen started pouring out of the ramp. Grouped together and heading in the same direction, which meant they were all heading to the same place. Truly a dash and drop then, as she suspected. Olivia spotted Kassy at the rear and waved as best she could with both hands holding cups.

Kassy pulled out of the line of marines and trotted towards her with a big smile and threw her arms around Olivia as soon as she was close. “Olivia! How the hell are you? I didn’t expect to see you aboard the station! You on leave?”

Olivia grinned into her friend’s shoulder. “So many questions,” she murmured as Kassy pulled back. “Coffee?”

Kassy accepted the proffered beverage with a grateful sigh.

“It might be cold,” Olivia warned.

Kassy shrugged as she took a sip. “Doesn’t matter. Still better than what this old bucket has.”

Olivia fell in step with Kassy as her friend moved to join back up with the rest of her shipmates. Major Owens walked just a few meters ahead, still not having noticed her. Deep in discussion with the retiring XO of the Metaurus.

“So what are you doing aboard the station?”

Olivia hitched her shoulders, a move Kassy recognized immediately as Olivia attempting to dodge an uncomfortable question. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk about the details of the Agebinium mission with Kassy, it was more that there conversational time was limited and Kassy would undoubtedly have questions she wouldn’t feel comfortable answering out in the open like this. “Sensitive mission drop off. Techs in dry dock figured it would be a good time to take a look at my ship, too.”

Kassy frowned at her. “I can see how that would be upsetting.”

Kassy wasn’t going to let her off the hook. So, shooting for a concise we-can-talk-about-this-later answer, Olivia said, “I met the man behind the Blitz.”

Kassy nearly tripped and _did_ spill her coffee in the process of regaining her footing. The liquid sloshed out through the little hole in the lid, spilling over her hands and Kassy swore, wiping them on her pants.

Olivia gave her an apologetic smile. “Sorry.”

The expression on Kassy’s face was pained. She clearly wanted to sit down and talk about it, but both of them knew that wasn’t possible in the current moment. It wasn’t a walking conversation. “Drinks tonight? The ceremonies should be over by 20:00 hours and we don’t leave port till morning.”

“Alright,” Olivia replied, “Quetzal Bar?”

“Sure.” Kassy side-eyed her after a long moment. “Anyone with you?”

This was more uncomfortable territory. Olivia hadn’t been entirely forthcoming in her messages to Kassy concerning her… whatever it was that she had for her Lieutenant. She pressed her lips together as she attempted to form an answer that wouldn’t invoke further questions. Questions she wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to answer just yet. Not even sure what her answers would be. “My Head of Marine Detail was with me.”

That was, apparently, the wrong thing to say, Olivia thought, as Kassy gave her an all together different kind of glance. The exact kind of glance Olivia had been attempting to avoid in the first place. A simple ‘yes’ would have sufficed, and she kicked herself for attempting to deflect the attention, as that had made her offer more information that question required. Kassy certainly wasn’t gonna get off the hook on this now; at least the time constraints on their brief interaction would limit the questioning.

“I see.”

That was all Kassy said, and yet the words were loaded with meaning.

Fortunately for Olivia, they were nearing the elevator that would take Kassy up where Olivia couldn’t follow. At least not for the next couple of hours. Hours which Olivia fully intended to use to decide how best to deflect certain questions. She found she’d rather talk about the Blitz than her budding feelings for a certain LT.

“Don’t think you’re off the hook, ‘Liv,” Kassy said, as if reading her thoughts.

She punched the button to call the next elevator after the last one left, full with half the crew of the Metaurus. Major Owens had finally spotted Olivia just as he was boarding and gave her a wave. She saluted him back.

“For which part?”

Kassy gave her a flat stare. “Both, shithead.”

“Go get promoted,” Olivia chuckled, practically shoving Kassy at the elevator as the doors re-opened. “And congratulations.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Kassy waved her away, backing into the elevator. “Quetzal, 20:00 sharp.”

Olivia knocked off a quick salute, snapping her feet together. “Sir, yes sir!”

The last thing she saw before the doors whisked shut was Kassy rolling her eyes. After a moment standing there, staring at nothing in particular, Olivia opened her ‘tool and sent Kaidan a message: _I_ _’m on for dinner._

She meandered around the station for a bit, not entirely sure what to do with herself in the few hours she had free in the mean time. Thinking about her predicament with Kaidan inevitably led her to omni-tools, wondering if he’d purchased one yet. That got her thinking about the little modshop she’d worked for during her one year stay aboard the station before joining the Alliance. She knew it was still open, still pulling in enough business to pay the bills. And, Olivia had to admit she missed the little old man that ran the place. A cantankerous little fellow who’d hired her, she was sure, partially because she was shorter than he was. _‘Won’t have to crane my damn neck all the time.’_

Her feet carried her to the lower levels, towards the little shop she’d grown to love when she had little else. It remained unchanged and that brought a smile to her face. That year hadn’t been the best in her life, but this little shop had provided a sense of stability. Olivia briefly wondered if the little studio just down the way was still an apartment or it’d been converted into something else, like an office. It’d been a good place for a teenager to live at the time. Certainly convenient. The civilian sector seemed to grow smaller every year, the prices driving higher.

She tossed her cup into a recycling shoot and stepped inside the shop.

Oran stood behind his counter, spectacles dangerously close to slipping off his nose entirely as he examined a broken omni-tool. He looked up at the jingle and his face flashed in surprise as he recognized her. Oran set the omni-tool down immediately and shuffled around the counter. “Olivia, darling! What the hell are you doing back in my shop? Finally come to your senses?”

That last question was accompanied with a stern look. She shook her head and Oran grasped her hand with both of his.

“You’ll break an old man’s heart saying things like that,” he frowned at her, though his eyes sparkled.

“I didn’t say anything,” she noted.

Oran waved her away and strode back to the counter, knowing she’d follow. “Well, you can make it up to me by helping an old man out.”

“Help with what?” she asked.

Olivia slipped behind the counter when Oran gave her a pointed look. “Just a got a custom order in for a savant. Your favorite play thing, right?” He didn’t bother waiting for her answering nod before plowing on. “Your desk is still back there.” He looked at her again, over the rim of his spectacles. “Though it’s gathered dust.”

“I promise I ever need to retire out of the military, this is the first place I’ll come looking for a job.”

“See that you do. Now get the hell on back there.”

She flashed him a grin and did just as he said. Her desk was exactly as she’d left it. Oran had to have hired help over the years, but it appeared very much as if he’d never given anyone else her old station. She hadn’t thought the old man that sentimental. She certainly hadn’t been the most talkative employee at the time. Short-tempered, unwilling to talk unless she had to, much preferring to work in the back and build things. Never hiding her disapproval whenever anyone came in looking for a blue wire, and downright refusing to work with the first three generations of the model. That had led to a lot of pissed of marines, but Oran had always had her back.

She ran her fingers over the desk before activating the terminal. Her old login was still good, too. No hacking required.

“I better not find out you’ve willed this hole to me when you die!” she shouted, raising her voice to be heard through the swinging door separating the main front of the store from the back.

All she received in return was a scoffed, “You wouldn’t appreciate it!”

-O-

Oran thumped a box down onto her desk, startling her out of the intense concentration she’d lost herself in. He put his hands on his waist, leaning back to stretch his muscles. “Maybe I should hire a proper assistant again.”

She sat up straight in her chair, relishing in the break she hadn’t realized she’d needed, hunched over her desk as she’d been. “Don’t know why you haven’t already.”

He rolled his shoulders as if he didn’t know either. “How much longer are you here?”

“Meeting some friends for dinner soon, but I can stick around for a bit longer.” She rotated her terminal so he could see it. “I checked everything in your inventory, made a few adjustments. Placed a couple things on order I think you’ll need. Savant and ariake both have some new mods coming to the market which don’t _seem_ thrilling at face value, so I know quite a few shops won’t order it right away - or won’t have sufficient stock for the demand. You’ll be ahead of the curve there.” She cast him a grin. “The tech-heads will be all over these mods. Especially since savant’s is cross compatible with a few other models.”

He examined her work over the rim of his spectacles. “Maybe I’ll just retire right now, let you take over.”

The little bell chimed, indicating a customer had entered the store. Oran sighed, shoved the box towards her, which she frowned at, and exited back to the main front. She frowned more when she saw that the box was full of the logic arrest omni-tools, all of them the latest model - Oran hadn’t put the stock out yet. Hadn’t done any of the prep work, either. Probably sold through his first batch and never got around to shelving the second. She sighed herself and set to work, shifting the box to a proper workbench behind her desk with more space.

She’d just finished cutting open the box when Oran hollered at her that he needed one of the logic arrest omni-tools to show a customer. Olivia sighed and rolled her eyes, and tipped over the box onto the table, hoping the customer wouldn’t mind the wait. The omni-tools spilled out across the surface, still sealed.

The old man definitely needed a proper assistant.

Oran poked his head around the corner. “You manage to set one up yet?”

She wiped at her face and gave him a flat look. “Do I look like a wizard?”

He muttered something out of her hearing and disappeared. She grabbed one of the logic arrests and removed the packaging, throwing up some dust which made her sneeze. The customer wasn’t at the counter when she pushed her way through the door, so she turned to Oran and handed him the ‘tool, grumbling about dusty boxes. The old man simply shrugged.

“Moonlighting, Commander?” Olivia glanced up in surprise and was confronted with a very amused Kaidan.

A very amused Kaidan in dark jeans that hugged him in ways she really shouldn’t be thinking about, _especially_ not in regards to the parts of him she _couldn_ _’t_ currently see, and a form-fitting t-shirt. Her mouth went very, very dry as she looked at him, the wry grin on his face only serving to highlight the extreme difference in his appearance and maybe, just _maybe_ this was what it had been like for him that morning, seeing her in her civvies.

She could get used to him in his civvies, she thought.

Olivia immediately shut that line of thinking down.

Oran prodded her in the shoulder, and she flushed, hyper aware that she’d been caught staring. “He one of yours?”

“You could say that,” she replied, and Kaidan cast a mystified glance at Oran, undoubtedly trying to work through the situation in his mind. Giving her the moment she needed to collect herself. She’d once told him she worked in an old tech shop to put food on her plate, but Olivia wasn’t sure if he remembered.

Oran harrumphed, eying Kaidan up and down. “At least he knows a perfectly good ‘tool when he sees one. Take him on back, then.” He returned the omni-tool to her.

A strangled noise escaped Kaidan’s throat and he flushed, eyes going wide. Oran gave him a sharp glance - and then after a few seconds where Kaidan shuffled on his feet, he grinned. A grin that likely made Kaidan feel like he was on the receiving end of the attention of a predator. Olivia leaned across the counter and tapped him on the arm, gesturing towards the gate access for employees, and said, “His bark is worse than his bite.”

Oran stopped Kaidan just as his hand fell across the gate, poking a finger at his chest. Kaidan looked at the digit in surprise. “There’ll be no ‘Commander’ and ‘sirs’ in my shop, you understand young man?”

Kaidan indicated he did with a quiet nod.

“Good.” Oran stepped aside. “Any friend of Olivia’s is a friend of mine. So long as we’re clear on that rank thing.”

Once they were through the back, she whispered, “Better call me Olivia while we’re here or you’re likely to get something thrown at your head.”

“Yes, ma-,” he coughed, “Olivia.”

She led him to her desk. Kaidan noted the little nameplate with her name on it and raised an eyebrow. “This the place you worked at before enlisting?”

She set his omni-tool down on the workspace and nodded. Knowing Kaidan, he’d probably prefer to do most of the setup himself, and, seeing as Oran had let him in the back, Olivia didn’t see any harm in letting him take over. That didn’t stop her from glancing towards the door first before saying, “Have a seat.”

Kaidan looked at her in surprise. “You sure?”

“Oran wouldn’t have let you back here if he thought you were a complete idiot,” she shrugged, “but if you really want me poking around your shiny ‘tool, doing all the things most tech shops don’t let you do when first initializing the device…” She trailed off, knowing that would catch his attention. Kaidan’s eyes had shifted from warm to challenging and he took a seat at her desk. She shifted a few things around then sat on the edge of the desk.

After a few minutes where Kaidan got himself situated, she said, “Surely you had a job somewhere before enlisting at twenty-two.”

He glanced up at her, the surprise etched on his face that she knew when he’d enlisted. Followed quickly by recognition that of course she’d read his career file. “Bouncer at a nightclub while I went to college.”

“Wouldn’t have pegged you for the bouncing sort,” she replied, and Kaidan shrugged.

Olivia wasn’t aware of all the particulars surrounding his implants and the adverse effects, but she _did_ know that the Normandy carried a good stock of high-end migraine meds. Had watched him stumble in early one morning while she was chatting with Williams to get some in order to go to his shift. Had noticed the wincing eyes and the quieter-than-normal air that surrounded him like fog that day. She had discreetly lowered the light settings in the cockpit, hopefully enough to mitigate their effect on him. Hadn’t dared to ask afterward if it had worked because she didn’t want to draw attention to his condition, to make him feel like an outcast, even inadvertently so.

“Music didn’t bother me too much. It was always the lights.” He carefully slipped the logic arrest around his wrist, taking the measurements he needed for the fit. “You learn to look away when the strobes are on, or avert your eyes when the disco ball tracks over you.”

They were silent for a while longer as he concentrated on his work. She could tell from the expression on his face that he was excited to set up his omni-tool and connect it to networks, tuning it to his needs specifically. All stuff he’d have done after the fact, but this was the _first_ time. Shops always set up omni-tools for the displays, activating them for customers before handing them over. Too many people never bothered to change those settings, they simply wanted in and out. To get something that worked immediately and with zero fuss.

Under normal circumstances, that’s what would have happened to Kaidan regardless of her pulling some ‘moonlighting’ work for Oran. He’d just lucked out that the logic arrest model he wanted hadn’t been shelved and therefore wasn’t out on the floor proper. Even luckier that she _was_ there and Oran trusted her.

“I uhh…” Kaidan broke the silence before trailing off, then cleared his throat and cast a glance up at her through his lashes before recommitting back to his task, “I met Kelila. Once.”

Olivia froze, fingers that had been idly drumming against the desk falling still. _That_ was unexpected. She closed her eyes, hoping he hadn’t read her body language negatively. “Let me guess. Officers Academy, guest lecturer?”

When she opened her eyes again, she noticed tension had bled out of Kaidan’s shoulders, tension he’d been holding for a while, she realized. Maybe even since Agebinium. “Yeah, actually. Hard to forget a woman like her.”

Olivia laughed. “I think she would have taken that as a compliment. She hold your class hostage, too?”

“I think she wanted too, but she was in a rush that day. Kept checking her ‘tool.”

He looked up at her. His eyes saying what he was hesitant to say out loud. That Kelila had probably been waiting for a message from her, waiting for it to be _their_ time to talk. That a civilian in a relationship with a marine meant odd communication hours, working around schedules, and sometimes missed calls.

Olivia closed her eyes again. Remembering Kelila as best she could, though the sharpness of the memories had faded over the years. Leaving behind faint traces of the smell of Kelila’s perfume or the way her laugh had always seemed to echo even in places where it wasn’t possible. “You know, she was the one to pick Elysium? ‘Too many people,’ I’d said when she offered that one up as a choice. But once she had her mind set on something, well… it was easier to go along than change it.”

“I dated a few people like that,” Kaidan replied with a smile. “Though, none of mine lasted. Clearly.”

Olivia shrugged uncomfortably. Here, at last, was the cold truth of the matter. The truth both she and Kelila had known, even on Elysium, but hadn’t yet acknowledged. Hadn’t wanted to acknowledge. “Mine wouldn’t have either.”

Kaidan cast his eyes back down to the workspace, and she worried on whether or not she’d made him feel awkward. Knowing the relationship would eventually end hadn’t stopped her from loving Kelila. Their differences may have eventually driven them apart, but Olivia rather doubted she would have ever stopped _caring._

And because the air in the room had become heavy with seriousness, she said, with a roll of her shoulders that was more nonchalant than she felt, “Well, you know what they say about snipers.”

Kaidan snorted, nearly dropping his ‘tool. Clearly not expecting her to make fun of herself, or her poor dating habits.

“What do they say?” he inquired once he got hold of himself. He dared a glance up at her and Olivia winked.

“No one ever teach you in the barracks?” she shook her head in mock dismay, mumbling about marines going lax. What _was_ it coming to these days? “Snipers make the worst lovers.”

She left off the second part, partially because it rang a little _too_ true.

Kaidan met her eyes rather daringly, his own clouding over with something she couldn’t quite pinpoint. “Well, I don’t have any empirical data on the subject, so I’m gonna have to file that claim as ‘dubious’. For now.”

Olivia didn’t know what to say to that, only realizing she was suddenly aware of their proximity, how much his words sounded like… well, certainly not words an LT would have for his CO. Reading between the lines, it was almost as if he was issuing a… not quite a challenge, as that implied he expected her to act on something. But certainly pressing some boundaries. She wouldn’t go so far as to assume that he was testing the waters, but the idea that he _could_ be warmed her to her core. Either way, he was certainly _flirting_.

“How long does it take to set up a goddamned omni-tool?” a cantankerous voice shouted, causing both of them to jump as they’d gotten lost in thought while looking at each other.

Olivia slipped off the bench, leaving Kaidan to finish his task. Oran came pummeling into the backroom before she even made it halfway across the floor and he peered around her, raising an eyebrow when he saw Kaidan fast at work. She followed his line of sight momentarily before looking back at the old man and shrugging. “Just trying out the new help,” she drawled. “Making a list of prospective employees, some changes…”

Oran narrowed his eyes. “I haven’t died _yet,_ darling.”

She pointed at him victoriously, having caught him out. “Aha!”

The old man threw up his hands, turned around, and exited back out to the store lobby. “She’s all yours, son!” A few seconds of silence followed before he added, “And her bite is almost certainly worse than her bark!”

“That’s providing,” Kaidan replied, raising his voice in the same manner he did when issuing orders throughout the cargo deck, “she has any bark to measure against!”

The sound of cackling was the only response they got in return, and Olivia rounded on her heels to stare at Kaidan. “I’ll show you my bark and my bite alright.”

The smug asshole didn’t even bother to look at her as he said, “I really rather doubt that, Olivia.”

She narrowed her eyes, marched towards him, and flicked him in the ear. “Implant, implant!”

“Oh don’t you pull that innocent crap on me, Kaidan. I know where your damn implant is.”

“Should have listened, kid,” Oran said, and Olivia peered over her shoulder to see the old man half-in, half-out of the backroom. He quickly disappeared from view as soon as her eyes met his.

For her part, she looked back at Kaidan and tapped the back of his neck. “You’re not even plugged in.”

Rather curiously, Kaidan flushed to the tips of his ears. _That_ was definitely an implant-area related reaction, but one she couldn’t place. Maybe it was touch sensitive? She put it out of her mind, though she _did_ note the way he didn’t quite meet her eyes for the following few seconds it took for the blush to fade away. Concentrating extra hard on his omni-tool which, she also noticed, was complete. He raised it up for her to see. “I’m uh, I’m done.”

“You want me to gift wrap that for you?” she asked.

Kaidan stared at her, dumbfounded. “Gift… wrap?”

She kicked the bottom drawer of her desk and elaborated, “’Cause I got some duct tape in there.”

Kaidan needled her in the stomach, catching on that she was still having a go at him. “You know, you joke now, but guess who has a picture of someone with a dirt smudge on their nose - a smudge which, by the way, is still there,” she furiously rubbed her nose with the sleeve of her jacket, glaring at him, “standing behind the counter at an omni-tool shop?”

“You didn’t.”

He shrugged. “I plead the fifth.”

“That’s not anywhere near as damning as you hanging in the middle of the air.”

“Gotta take what I can get,” he shrugged, “I hear it’s hard to catch a sniper right out. What time is it?”

She checked her ‘tool, eyes widening in surprise when she saw just _how much_ time had actually passed. “Nearly time to meet Williams.”

“Damn.”

Olivia deactivated her ‘tool and looked at Kaidan questioningly as he removed the omni-tool she’d given him from his arm, replacing it with his shiny new one. Completely oblivious to her gaze, not that she could exactly fault him for that, she would be too in his position. So she prodded him in the shoulder. Ignoring the fact that her heart had fluttered at the disappointment in his voice. “Damn?”

He rose his omni-tool arm. “No time for playing.”

Olivia plopped herself back onto the desk, careful of her dress and exposed legs against any sharp instruments, and said, “I don’t think Williams will be terribly annoyed if we’re a little late.”

Kaidan only spared her the briefest of glances, paying more attention to his omni-tool as it cycled through the start up sequence. Getting ready to transfer all his military credentials for the second time that week. The glance was long enough for him to convey a little smile, especially for her, and it set her insides buzzing. A buzzing which continued even as his gaze slipped away, traveling down the length of her dress and she wasn’t entirely sure what to make of that.

She still hadn’t entirely gotten over his reaction from that morning, when she’s first run into him. And she was sure that was part of the reason why Tali and Williams had started acting so suspiciously on the first place. One grabbing hold of the other and beating a hasty retreat before she could think to ask them what the hell that had been about.

It’d started because Tali squealed, as soon as Kaidan entered the room, ‘ _Oh I guess it is!_ _’_ Undoubtedly referencing the dating conversation from just moments before, though for the life of her, Olivia couldn’t think _why_ the quarian would have jumped to _that_ conclusion. She hadn’t thought her crush was _that_ obvious, so clearly there had to have been some sort of cultural misunderstanding exacerbating the issue. Like the whole connected suits thing. Olivia had completely forgotten to ask about that, and made a note to do so in the near future. Maybe that would clear up a few things.

A hand waving in her face brought her out of her reverie, and she apologized for spacing out. “Ready for dinner?” Kaidan asked.

“You done playing?”

“Williams might not be annoyed if we’re a little late, but I think she will mind an hour.”

Olivia nodded, slipped off the desk, and led Kaidan back to the store lobby. Oran was happily chatting away with another customer, so she rang Kaidan up for his ‘tool, giving him a discount when Oran gave her a pointed look, which Kaidan thanked him for immediately.

Once they were out of the store, he stopped and dug around in his pocket. “Oh! Your old ‘tool!”

She waved him off. “I _gave_ that to you. I don’t care if you bought a new one. Besides,” she grinned, “you might need it again if you break this one, too.”

His answering expression was priceless.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Ashley makes heart eyes at a gorgeous musician and Kaidan meets Kassy and discovers something surprising about the Commander.

Ashley found Tali standing in an open courtyard that’d been repurposed for the night, hosting a small open concert. She wouldn’t have thought to find such an event at the center of the Alliance government. Then again, the civilian sector was bigger than she’d thought it would be; something which shouldn’t have surprised her, but it did. The few times she had visited Arcturus in the past had been quick trips, or solely for the training sectors. Never for leave. There were a lot of shops and hotels once you got outside the military wings. All of them confined to a few decks of the station, sure, but more than enough to house a few thousand people. Arcturus was like a mini-Citadel in that respect. More military centric. But then she supposed with how big the Citadel was, it probably had its own military wing as well. And to be fair, she’d only explored the Presidium and a very small section of one ward.

The band was playing folk music. Music not normally to her taste, but she found the set rather pleasant. Appealing even.

The quarian had managed to squish her way into the crowd near the front. Ashley considered following suit but, after assessing the crowd, decided she really didn’t need to be pressed up against a bunch of music junkies. Someone more enthused deserved the place she would occupy. She glanced around the courtyard and spotted the beer garden. Across various planets, stations, and outposts, one thing always remained the same: wherever there was an open concert, there was a designated beer and wine area for those who were looking for a more low key experience than the dancing crowds offered.

Ashley grabbed a small table after flashing her ID, messaged Tali where to find her should the quarian desire a break, and ordered a drink.

Once her beer arrived, she turned to crowd watching. Sitting back in her chair to properly enjoy the view. It didn’t take her long to spot a few other Normandy personnel enjoying themselves in the throng. Some noticed her in return and nodded, one or two stopping to say hi on their way for a refill. She half-expected to find Alenko here, this seemed his kind of thing. Even with the migraine issue and his apparent disdain for clubs, she could easily see him taking up a seat in the beer garden, enjoying a drink and the music.

Ashley nearly spit out her drink when she spotted Wrex in the very back of the crowd. Holding a monster of a mug that looked almost as if a server had repurposed a small keg for the krogan. _Clearly_ enjoying himself, judging from what she’d come to know of him over the few weeks they’d been in each others company aboard the Normandy. He didn’t appear angry, and that was basically her threshold for determining his mood.

She couldn’t resist herself. She rose from her table and navigated the throng of people to the krogan’s position. Falling in next to him without a simple, “Wrex,” by way of greeting.

Wrex eyed her without looking directly at her, an experience that was still unnerving no matter how many times she caught him in the act. Ashley felt distinctly like a meal that didn’t know it was about to be plated when he did that. “Williams.”

“Didn’t know this was your kind of thing.” Wrex raised his keg-mug and Ashley said, “Ah.”

Another song played while they stood there. The music kept growing on her with each passing song. Helped in no small degree, she was sure, by the fact she’d noticed the lead guitarist was _very_ attractive. Too far away to really get a solid look at him, but she’d already started looking forward to the moments he provided back up vocals. His voice was silky smooth, and she found herself wanting to listen to a song performed solely by him. Found herself cheering with the rest of the crowd when the song was over and pointedly ignored the look Wrex gave her in return.

“Didn’t know this was _your_ kind of thing,” he said, wryly. “No guns involved.”

She shrugged. “We could fix that, you and me.”

Wrex tilted his head to the side as the band started another song, a slower one. “It would punch up the music.”

“You come here alone, then?”

Wrex was silent for a bit, exuding an air of thoughtfulness that made Ashley feel of guilt for being surprised by it. “Pressly asked if I was interested in tagging along. Said a bunch of the crew were coming. That I was crew, too.”

The way he said it sounded almost as if Wrex was implying that, at some point, the XO hadn’t considered him crew. Or hadn’t wanted to acknowledge that fact. She wasn’t the only person to express her reticence over aliens aboard the ship - and, undoubtedly, she wasn’t the only person shut down by the Commander. Well, not shut down. That implied a level of harshness coupled with an unwillingness to listen on Shepard’s behalf, and while Ashley couldn’t speak for Pressly’s conversation with the Commander, that wasn’t how it had gone for her.

Shepard had let her voice her opinions and misgivings, and then explained very clearly why she made the choices she did. All of them understandable, and Ashley had been forced to admit that a part of her issue with the aliens aboard the ship had nothing to do with the aliens and everything to do with her being a Williams. But instead of shoving a boot up her ass or writing a formal report on her record, Shepard had sat down with her and talked it out. Had helped Ashley to come to the conclusions she now held - that the aliens were their allies in this endeavor and each of them had something to offer to the mission. Something Shepard saw as important, because there was more to this mission than what had started on Eden Prime. Everyone aboard ship recognized that, they were all just waiting for the eventual reveal.

Ashley had caught Shepard a few times up late at night with a stack of datapads on the table in front of her, talking over theories with the XO and, occasionally, Alenko.

“Tali dragged me here,” she said after the song finished.

Ashley didn’t want to admit she’d been drawn into that last one. The slow moving melody where she’d almost gotten her wish. The guitarist had provided the vocals with his rich voice, sending shivers down her spine.

“I’m gonna go get a refill,” she announced when Wrex gave her a knowing look. She could say ‘dragged’ all she liked, the krogan clearly knew she was there because she wanted to be. Ashley gave him her best ‘shithead’ look before waltzing off, leaving him to his corner.

Her table, unsurprisingly, had been claimed by others in her absence, so Ashley plopped onto a stool at the bar settled in. She checked the time on her omni-tool - still had a good bit before dinner with Alenko and Shepard. Ashley had invited Tali, too, but it looked increasingly as if tearing the quarian away from the concert would be an effort in futility. She had long since lost sight of her in the growing throng of people.

It also appeared as if the band currently playing was the opening act, not the main feature. The lead singer announced their last song, the name of which she didn’t catch over the crowd clapping its approval. And then they started playing. A nice closing song, a song about goodbyes.

A damn shame in Ashley’s book. The band was _good_. And she didn’t just think that because she’d noticed how incredibly good looking and talented the guitarist was. They should have their own show, not be relegated to the opening act for others.

That guitarist certainly deserved to be a main feature.

She shook her head, almost appalled at her obvious attraction. That didn’t stop her from leaning across the bar and picking up a flyer with the program of the evening, searching for the name of the band she’d fallen in love with, hoping to divine the name of her guitarist. Her chances were pretty good at guessing as there were only three people in the group, and only one guitarist. Unfortunately, they didn’t do the breakdown by what they played, just listed the names out in alphabetical order. That didn’t help her new found cause and frustrated her growing crush, so she tossed the flyer back onto the bar.

She was being ridiculous. She didn’t know him, didn’t know who he was, and was likely to never meet the man. Especially if he was a marine, which, judging from the program title ‘Military Misfits’ he probably was.

That didn’t stop her from fantasizing about it, though. A chance encounter or some such. Getting posted to the same boat in the future - though that would likely put her in the same situation Alenko and Shepard found themselves in. Liking each other and wondering what to do about it, or if anything should be done. She’d probably go for it, which was why she didn’t care what Alenko and Shepard did on their own time. So long as the crew functioned, they could make heart eyes at each other as much as they pleased. No one outside of the Normandy would hear a peep from her.

Tali slammed into the counter, obviously intoxicated. “I loved that band!”

“What-how?” Ashley stammered, hauling Tali back up to her feet.

“They have turian brandy here!”

The quarian waved the bartender over, ordered another brandy, and then Ashley watched in amazement as the quarian pulled out a metal straw from her pocket and attached it to a hose on her helmet. The brandy was gone in five seconds. “Damn, kid.”

“When you’re trying to keep up with people not wearing suits drinking with you, you learn to drink fast to keep up.”

“You are surprisingly articulate for being sloshed.”

“Please,” Tali waved away Ashley’s concerns, “I’m not ‘sloshed’. This is only my third one.”

Ashley checked the time on her omni-tool and realized she was dangerously close to being late to dinner. “You sure I can leave you alone like this?”

“I’m not alone! Half the ship is here! Wrex is here!” Tali practically shoved Ashley off her stool. “Go meet the loverbirds for dinner and tell me all about it tomorrow.”

Ashley eyed the quarian dubiously but complied. She _did_ snag Wrex on her way out and told him to watch over Tali in her stead. The krogan grumbled about babysitting when he was trying to enjoy himself, but nodded nonetheless. Just as Ashley knew he would. Wrex may pretend to be an old sod who’d rather shout at all the kids to get off his lawn, but she was beginning to suspect he was a bit of a softie. At least, when it came to krogan.

Another person she’d unfairly misjudged.

With that done, Ashley headed for Cafe Confidante.

 

-O-

 

Ashley arrived late to the Cafe, but she still managed to beat both Alenko and Shepard. She grabbed a table near the window after ordering a sandwich at the counter. The place felt more like a diner than a cafe but that suited her just fine. She’d picked it because of the raving reviews of the food, and after weeks of eating mess food, well, she wanted something with some actual flavor.

Her sandwich arrived before either the LT or the Commander. She let it sit on the table, wondering if she should send either of them a message. They were beginning to push twenty minutes late. An act that was unlike both of them and she found it rather dubious that both would have been independently held up. Which meant, in her mind, they were together. And she was sure if an official matter had come up, one or the other would have sent her message, letting her know what was up.

She’d just opened her omni-tool to send Shepard a message when both of them finally appeared, bee-lining for the table. Alenko managed to appear sheepish, at the very least, when she directed her disappointed stare their way.

“Kaidan got a new omni-tool,” was the only explanation Shepard offered for their tardiness.

Ashley closed her eyes. She could fill in the blanks easily enough, knowing the two geeks taking their seats across from her. (Together, she noticed. Scooting their chairs the tiniest bit closer to the other.) A new omni-tool meant futzing around with the specs, mods, set up, etc. All the things she herself didn’t bother with, and she pointedly ignored all the reproving looks Shepard cast her way whenever Ashley used her omni-tool and Shepard thought she wasn’t looking. The Commander was a downright omni-tool elitist. Not that Williams didn’t understand, of course. Spec ops infiltrators would be rather specific about the gear they used. She just hadn’t expected Shepard to outwardly besmirch the blue wire - the omni-tool most marines in the Alliance used.

Even Alenko hadn’t given her an apologetic look the one time Ashley actively caught him staring. Just a shrug that as much said, ‘what can you do’ in a resigned sort of way.

“I’m surprised you two didn’t abandon me all together, then.” And because Alenko was staring at her sandwich, she added, “The counter is that way, LT.”

She emphasized her statement by pointing her finger in the indicated direction.

Shepard was already out of her seat and at the counter by the time Alenko stood up. While they ordered their food, Ashley’s thoughts fell back onto the concert she’d just left. To the band that had played music not to her tastes, yet still managed to captivate her attention. To the guitarist and his dark skin, long hair pulled back away from his face. Her mouth went dry as she pictured him on the stage, lit by the changing lights, face shimmering with sweat from the heat radiating his way. From performing.

That was an image that was gonna haunt her dreams in all the right ways.

She _still_ wished she’d managed to get his name. Not that she knew what she’d _do_ with it, but she found she very much wanted to put a name to the man. To think of him as he was, and not just as ‘the guitarist with magical hands and a gorgeous face’.

Not to mention the voice of an angel.

The loud bang of a plate dropping on the table startled her out of her reverie and Ashley found Shepard staring at her with a curious expression. She became aware that she was holding her sandwich midair, as if she’d gone to take a bite and then forgot about it. Well, that was embarrassing.

“If I didn’t know better,” Shepard started, “I’d say you’ve got someone on your mind.”

Her wicked grin left zero doubt as to what she meant by ‘someone’.

And at last, Ashley got to play her cards. She carefully set her sandwich down, noting the LT’s position still at the counter as he waited for his sandwich, and said, “You wanna talk about love interests, then by all means, Commander,” she smiled and swept out her hand dramatically, “let’s start with the LT.”

Shepard set her sandwich down after having just picked it up, cast a glance at the Alenko, confirming every suspicion Ashley had in the first place, then said, “Consider the matter dropped.”

“Fair’s fair, Skipper.” Shepard narrowed her eyes. “I know the ‘title’ yours goes by, so the least you should know in return is the one I have for mine.”

After a few moments where Shepard visibly struggled with herself, she asked, “And that would be?”

“The guitarist,” Ashley sighed. Keenly aware of how ridiculously besotted she sounded as she said it but not caring. Some things were worth sighing over.

“Who’s the guitarist?” Alenko asked, and Shepard jumped in her seat.

Alenko arched an eyebrow at Shepard as he took his seat next to her, so to save Shepard some face, Ashley answered his question. “A guy I met tonight at a concert Tali dragged me to. Well, for some definition of ‘met’. He was part of the opening act.”

“Got a thing for musicians?” Alenko teased.

“I do when they’re gorgeous,” Ashley shot back. “Besides, there’s something about a man playing a guitar that just really gets me going. You’re not honestly gonna tell me you wouldn’t date a musician, LT.”

“Well, sure,” Alenko replied, oblivious to his surroundings, “Preferably one who plays an instrument with strings.”

“Why?” Shepard finally asked.

Alenko turned his head to look at her. “What?”

“Why strings?”

“Yeah, LT,” Ashley joined in, curious herself, “why strings?”

Ashley liked all instruments, even the unconventional ones. The ones people never used for ‘wooing’ purposes. And while she knew Alenko was classically romantic, it struck her as curious that he had a preference for an instrument. Of course, she was partial to the piano herself. It still wasn’t a strike against her mysterious guitar player.

Alenko looked from one woman to the next, still not saying anything. He seemed unsure if he _should_ say something.

“Are we talking guitar and banjo strings, or are we talking violin and cello strings?” Ashley helpfully asked. Then, after eying him, she added, “Or electric guitar?”

Shepard arched an eyebrow at the question, and finally, Alenko found his voice. “Violin and cello, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“You’re the ones who made me choose. And now, if you please, I’d like to eat my sandwich.” Before either of them could respond, he had the sandwich in hand and took a bite.

They ate in companionable silence for the most part. Alenko and Shepard started talking about his new ‘tool, Shepard recommending mods she thought would perform admirably, Alenko refuting her on a few of those claims. Or even agreeing, but insisting he didn’t need that kind of performance or power or whatever the hell else the mod was supposed to do. A lot of the tech talk flew in one ear and out the other. Not that she couldn’t understand it if she wanted, more that she wasn’t interested in the subject matter. But she let them nerd it out without her. Alenko had a new toy, and both of them were excited over said new toy. Regardless of their obvious mutual attraction.

Ashley was gonna enjoy the hell out of watching that sucker develop.

She had to admit, despite meeting Commander Shepard in the field (maybe even partially because of it), she’d come to the Normandy with some preconceptions about Shepard. About the type of woman she was, all of which was based on her own notions about who a war hero should be mixed with what the media had portrayed. She was beginning to realize the media didn’t really know the Commander at all. There were no exposes about how big of a giant fucking nerd Shepard was, nor any mention that she managed to read at least one book a week. In the spare time she didn’t have, yet managed to find.

From those interviews and op-eds, there was never any indication that Shepard was a soft spoken person in her personal time, or that she preferred quiet nights to going out.

Ashley much preferred the real thing, and considered it the media’s loss that they didn’t.

“Alright nerds,” Ashley interrupted them, poking each of them in the head as they were hunched over the table examining Alenko’s omni-tool around his wrist. Shepard rubbed her head indignantly, but Alenko at least had the grace to appear abashed. Whether or not he actually was… “It’s just an omni-tool.”

All pretense at appearing mollified evaporated from Alenko’s face like a drop of water on a hot burner.

“ _Just_ an omni-tool?” Shepard exclaimed at the same time Alenko stated unequivocally, “It’s not _just_ an omni-tool.”

Ashley didn’t know who to chastise with her gaze first, shifting her eyes from one to the other. Identical expressions of indignation on their faces. Yeah, she wasn’t surprised the least bit they’d fallen for each other. Whether either of them realized how bad they had it yet… well, that was another matter entirely. And up to them to figure out.

Fortunately, Shepard’s omni-tool pinged a notification, making the decision for her. Ashley focused the full heat of her gaze on Alenko, raising an eyebrow. The LT simply narrowed his eyes in response. “I think you should apologize to my omni-tool.”

“Absolutely not.”

Shepard made an anxious noise, then looked up at both of them. “I gotta run.”

“We’ve only been here thirty minutes!” Ashley exclaimed.

“I was supposed to meet a friend for drinks in an hour and a half, but her ship just called to action,” Shepard explained, standing up from the table. “Gotta meet her at my apartment for a thing.”

“Maybe we could all grab drinks later then?” Alenko inquired. “I had nothing planned for the rest of the evening.”

“Uh,” Shepard shoved an arm through her jacket. “Sure. You know where my apartment is?”

“Send me the address,” Alenko replied.

Ashley shook her head when Shepard shifted her gaze to her, finally having gotten her other arm through the jacket. “Not me, I was planning on checking on Tali at the concert. She was busy getting herself sloshed. Someone should look after her that isn’t Wrex.”

“Good idea,” Shepard answered, and turned back to Alenko. “Kass is still in a meeting, but it’s almost over. Swing by in thirty minutes or so. You pick the bar.”

He nodded and Shepard sped off.

“Why didn’t you just go with her now?” Ashley asked him.

He swiveled back to looking at her, aware that he’d been caught staring after Shepard. Though he said nothing on the matter, which only made Ashley smile inwardly. She wondered if this was what she looked like thinking about the guitarist. Good lord.

“Don’t want to interrupt her friend thing.”

“I doubt Shepard would have minded,” Ashley said. “Besides, we’re all done eating, and sitting her for another, what, twenty-five minutes with nothing to do?”

Alenko grinned at her. “You calling me dull, Ash?”

“I’m calling this _booth_ dull,” she answered. “Walk with me to the concert if you like.”

She rose from the seat and Alenko followed suit. Once they were out the door, he asked, “Just how sloshed was Tali?”

“Three turian brandies in when I left. Using a goddamn straw.”

Alenko barked a laugh, and then his omni-tool buzzed. Undoubtedly the message from Shepard giving him her apartment address.

“So how’s the new omni-tool?”

“Great. Should have broken my old one sooner.”

“Or been less stingy with your credits.”

He conceded the point with a nod, but then said, “Or maybe I’d have only broken a new ‘tool if I’d done that.”

“Yeah, but you weren’t entirely without geek power. Shepard gave you an old one of hers.”

“A savant,” he muttered. “Perfectly good ‘tool, sure, but not to my tastes. And Shepard’s customizations were pretty extreme. I spent a good hour resetting all the shortcuts.”

“I’ll just bet you did, LT,” Ashley murmured as they continued walking. “I’ll just bet you did.”

 

-O-

 

Kaidan consulted a map of Arcturus for the first time in several years. He’d assumed, when he’d asked for Shepard’s apartment address, that she was quartered with the rest of the marines. Maybe in a separate wing for Special Forces, but with the Alliance nonetheless. He hadn’t in a million years considered that she might have rented a room at full price somewhere else. Few marines did, and none that he knew. Not when the Alliance subsidized apartments to marines at good rates. Not when any marine could get a temporary room aboard the station for free on the fly.

Instead, he found himself a solid five decks below the Alliance housing section, searching for a private address.

He had the uncanny feeling he was on his way to pick up a date rather than meet up with his CO. His feelings on the matter weren’t helping either, in that those feelings were definitely _real_.

Kaidan could no longer really deny that fact anymore. Not after having spent a good portion of his afternoon with her, however unintentionally. Not when he’d been told in no uncertain terms that he was expected to call her by her first name while in the tech shop she used to work in. Not when he got such a personal and up close glimpse into her past and found he rather liked what he saw. That he wanted to see more.

It had been entirely too easy to start thinking of her as Olivia. Even now he found himself slipping on the matter, followed by silently chastising himself. Only to slip up again not a few minutes later.

He rather thought he was fighting a losing battle on that front. Should have known the first time he called her Olivia earlier that day that it would start a snowball in his mind, rolling downhill. Picking up speed as it went.

It was too easy to think of her as just Olivia. Too easy to ask her if she wanted to get drinks later since her plans had gone to shit. Too easy to convince himself that even if it wasn’t actually a date, it still felt like a date. Especially since Williams had bailed. For a noble cause, sure, and one he couldn’t blame her for, but there was still that fact that it left them heading out, late at night, alone.

A very fine line he found himself walking.

To top it off, he was half convinced it was all one sided. Despite a few indicators that maybe it wasn’t, but Kaidan didn’t want to make assumptions on her behalf. Just because he perceived a situation as… electric between them, didn’t mean it was. And he had to admit he wasn’t sure he was her type after recent events. Thinking about Oli- _Shepard_ _’s_ sexuality was certainly a matter he had no business considering in the first place. She was his CO for Christ’s sake.

Kaidan was officially putting too much thought into the subject.

He worried on his bottom lip and checked the map again. Unconsciously smoothing his jeans as he came upon her door, and after another pat down, this one consciously done, he pressed the door chime.

The neighborhood was quiet. Kaidan could see why Olivia had chosen it. Not that the marine barracks were noisy by comparison, though they could get rowdy. He meant the other kind of quiet. Foot traffic was low, which meant fewer reasons for a reporter to dip their feet down this path and accost her. And there was always at least one reporter prowling the halls of the Alliance wing, looking for a story.

In fact, Kaidan noted as he glanced around, an elevator just down the hall would take him up to the courtyard in front of Changs. Where they’d first met. He hadn’t realized she’d been so close to home that evening.

The door wooshed open and a small brunette greeted him, a finger held up to her lips as she beckoned him inside, speaking in a hushed tone, “I just convinced her to play for me, don’t ruin it.”

“Uh, okay?” Kaidan kept his voice down.

The woman held out her hand once the door closed behind him. “I’m Kassy, by the way. You are? ‘Liv didn’t mention a date.”

Kaidan carefully kept his mouth shut for a solid moment as he shook her hand, counting out a few breaths before answering. A date! Well, that answered one question at least. “It’s uh, it’s not a date.” Careful breathing hadn’t helped at all. He rushed out the rest. “I’m Kaidan. Head of Marine Detail for the Normandy.”

Kassy gave him an odd, considering look and a smile spread across her face. He felt distinctly as if she was seeing straight through him. He very carefully resisted the urge to shift his feet, though he _did_ look away.

“So you’re the friend?” he asked. “The one who got called to action?”

“Yeah, distress call. I’m pushing it stopping by, but the checks are still going for undocking procedures. I’ve got,” she checked her ‘tool, “fifteen minutes before I absolutely have to haul ass out of here.”

“Who the hell are you talking to?” a distant voice shouted.

Kassy grinned, beckoning him to follow her to the living room. “No one! Get your damn cello out and play me a song already!”

Kaidan froze as soon as Kassy said ‘cello’. And now, now Olivia’s sudden stillness when Williams asked him which type of stringed instrument he’d prefer a date to play if he could choose made sense.

“I’m rusty!”

“Hardly,” Kassy called from the living room.

Kaidan remembered to move again when Kassy peered around the corner to see what was holding him up. Thankfully, she didn’t say anything.

Olivia’s apartment was small, but still larger than the ones provided by the Alliance. It felt _cosy_. It also felt like her, though he couldn’t pinpoint what it was that provided that feeling. A mixture of things really. Her rifle from the Blitz hanging on the wall. A few retro sci-fi posters hanging in frames. A workbench crammed into the kitchen with tools scattered across the surface. A purple sofa with a green throw blanket tossed over the back, giving the whole room a home-ie feeling.

He bee-lined straight for her old vid collection and heard Kassy laugh, muttering, “Of course.”

He ran his fingers over a few of the titles before his eyes settled on a picture frame resting on top of the case, depicting Olivia and Kassy on a ship he didn’t recognize. He picked it up and turned to her. “You two served together?”

“Yeah, many years ago. Infiltration Ops Division, we were on the same sniping squad” Kassy fell in next to him. “Right around the Blitz.” She was quiet for a moment as she took the frame from him and stared at it. Then she met his eyes, expression serious. “Thank you for being there for her when I couldn’t.”

“Of course,” he answered.

“You held her hand?”

Just barely phrased as a question, which meant Olivia had told her about it.

“Seemed like the right thing to do when the asshole decided to, well… you know.”

“Yeah,” Kassy murmured, casting her eyes back down to the frame. “I do. And it was. She already faced that alone once. No one should have to do it twice.” And then without missing a beat, “I’m getting gray hairs out here waiting on your ass!”

A soft something came flying out of the bedroom and hit Kassy square in the face. Kassy gasped in surprise as the object fell to the floor, eyes still closed from the direct hit. Kaidan knelt down to pick up the projectile and discovered it was a small plushy owl. An incredibly soft one.

“I didn’t even aim!” Olivia triumphantly called from the bed room, having correctly guessed as to the reason for the gasp.

She appeared in the doorway a moment later, holding her cello in front of her - and stumbled when she met his eyes, Kaidan still kneeling on the ground holding the owl. Her frozen in spot where she’d stumbled, both of them unable to look away from the other for their own reasons.

Kassy pointed at her in indignation. “Serves you right, jackass.”

Olivia finally slipped her gaze away from him. “You answered my door and didn’t tell me I had a guest?”

Kassy put her hands on her hips and arched an eyebrow. “You didn’t tell me a guest was coming in the first place?”

Olivia looked back at him, ignoring Kassy’s question. “Has it really been thirty minutes?”

Kaidan rose from his kneeling position, still holding the owl. “I may be a little early, but Williams really wanted to return to the concert.”

“You know,” Olivia said, face brightening at that, “she may _say_ she’s only going back to check on Tali, but we both know the real reason.”

“The guitarist?”

“The guitarist,” she confirmed.

“Who the hell is the guitarist?”

Olivia and Kaidan both shrugged, though Olivia added, “Some incredibly gorgeous musician, apparently.”

“Speaking of musicians,” Kassy folded her arms across her chest and pointedly stared at the cello.

Kaidan would be lying if he said he wasn’t curious himself. He pretended he didn’t notice Olivia glancing nervously at him, pretended he didn’t remember the earlier conversation where he stated his preference. Granted that was an ‘if he had to choose’ kind of deal, because Williams had been unrelenting in her pursuit of an answer. But he really did prefer the violin and cello to the other stringed instruments.

Olivia hauled a stool over next to sofa, gesturing to them to take a seat. “What song do you want me to play?”

Kaidan noticed the distinct lack of sheet music as he sat down next to Kassy. Peered around the room to see if she had a music stand or something, but there wasn’t anything that he could see.

“How about happy birthday?” Kassy ventured.

Having started a few warm up notes, Olivia didn’t even pause as she peered over at Kassy and said, “It’s not your birthday.”

Despite her words, she played a few notes of the happy birthday song before resuming her warm up, and Kaidan chuckled.

“No,” Kassy replied, grinning, “but yours is just around the corner.”

“I’m not playing happy birthday for myself, nor am I wasting this mini-concert on such a trivially easy piece.”

Olivia had shifted her practice notes to actual music seamlessly, without him noticing until it was done. Playing a string that evoked tension. Readiness. If he closed his eyes, he almost felt like he could recognize the song.

Eyes still closed as he continued listening, Kaidan realized Olivia was good. Better than good, she was fantastic. If she fumbled anything, it wasn’t noticeable. At least not to his admittedly untrained ears.

After a minute, the melody shifted again, this time to something he recognized with mild surprise. Kaidan leaned forward in his seat, unable to keep the excitement out of his voice. “Are you playing _The Imperial March_?”

Olivia grinned at him, eyes bright and blue as she moved into the chorus. A stray piece of hair having escaped the braids that led to her bun dangling across her eyes. She lost herself in the music, in the march, her gestures as ominous as the song she played. Sharp and efficient. At the height of the song, she transitioned to something else again, as if she were playing a medley. In fact, she was, one of her own invention. This song was one he didn’t recognize. A mournful piece, yet fast. Anxious. He watched her play for a while, her hand commanding the bow with ease.

And then he slid his eyes up to her face to find that hers were closed.

He wanted terribly to reach out and smooth the hair away from her eyes. A foolish desire, but one he couldn’t rid himself of it was so strong.

She changed the song the precise moment she opened her eyes. Switching to something lively, a song that made him want to get up and dance. He smiled as he watched her, all his prior doubts and worries forgotten. Olivia was captivating. Watching how _into_ the music she was. How much she was clearly enjoying herself. Olivia was one with her cello.

Kassy tapped him on the shoulder and murmured, “You never have to ask her to play a song. She’ll play several.”

Without pausing, or even looking at them, Olivia said, “It’s rude to talk during a performance.”

The words didn’t carry any real heat, and she’d accompanied them with a wry grin.

“Any requests before I close this out?”

Kaidan barely resisted the urge to ask her to keep playing more instead. He’d pass on drinks if she kept playing, spend his whole evening just listening to her play. A dangerous position for him, but he found he didn’t care about the consequences at that moment.

“Something heartfelt?” Kassy volunteered.

This time Olivia did glance at her. “You and your romance.”

But she obliged. Picking a good moment to transition into a slow love song he believed was called _I Was Lost Without You_ , one he’d heard a few times over the radio. A relatively new one, he thought, new enough he couldn’t see her having had the time to really practice it. Yet she played the main melody nonetheless, tapping the heel of her boot on the ground.

Kaidan couldn’t take his eyes off her, couldn’t stop watching her play. And then, in the middle of the chorus, her eyes met his and this time, this time he knew the electricity that shot through him wasn’t just felt by him, wasn’t imagined. How he knew, he couldn’t say, but he did. In that moment, his eyes gazing into hers as she finished out the song, he knew.

And then it was over. The bow sliding across the strings one last time, the final note lingering in the air before fading away. Kassy broke out in applause and Kaidan followed suit a half second later, abashed at how awe-struck he’d become while watching Olivia play. Olivia smiled and rose from her stool.

“A truly spectacular performance,” Kassy said, and Kaidan nodded in agreement.

More than spectacular, really. But he didn’t trust himself to speak at the moment.

“Will you stop holding my present ransom?”

“How else was I gonna get you to play for me?”

Olivia pointed her bow at Kassy. “I didn’t just play for you.”

“Not in the end,” Kassy agreed with a smile Kaidan couldn’t quite figure out. She dug around in the bag at her feet and pulled out a small box. “Here you go. I put the book exchange in there, too. It’s a surprise.”

Olivia winced and Kassy sighed. “Some day I’ll get you to like romance, ‘Liv.”

“It’s just so _predictable._ I like the ones that aren’t just fine, but you’re not giving me those.”

“Give this one a chance.”

Olivia threw her bow hand into the air, picked her cello up with the other, and walked towards her bedroom. “Fine.”

Kassy laughed, and leaned back on the sofa. Checking her ‘tool again, probably for the time.

This day had definitely taken an unexpected turn, one Kaidan wasn’t sure he could walk back on. Wasn’t sure he wanted to. He rather really liked this side of Olivia.

“When is her birthday?” he inquired.

Kassy glanced at him. “In nine days.”

Kaidan nodded at the package. “What’s in it?”

He’d meant the book, but Kassy leaned towards him excitedly. “It’s chalk full of dark chocolate.”

Olivia appeared in the doorway again and Kassy clicked her mouth shut. “Do you have to go?”

“Unfortunately,” Kassy stood up from the couch and embraced the other woman.

Feeling a bit awkward sitting while everyone else was standing, Kaidan stood, too. Shook Kassy’s hand once she finished the hug, kissing Olivia on the forehead. Then, true to her earlier words, she hauled ass out of the apartment. Not even waiting for Olivia to open the present - probably why she’d told Kaidan what was in it in the first place. Knew that Olivia would overhear.

In the silence that followed, Kaidan found himself shuffling back to the vid case. Admiring the collection of really old sci-fi on display. He didn’t notice Olivia had fallen in next to him till she asked, “Would you rather go out or watch a movie?”

His fingers fell on _Gateway_. “I didn’t know they made a movie about the book.”

He turned to look at Olivia and found her smiling up at him. “Movie it is.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thus ends Part Two! Officially one third done with the story, if you only consider parts and not word count. Thank you all for reading so far, and for all the lovely comments! :) Each one makes my day.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Part Three of Crosshairs! Some new characters will make an appearance as we head into Feros! As always, thank you all for reading and for the wonderful comments. :)

**Part Three**  

Without exception, sleeping in was the greatest benefit of shore leave. Even if she only got the one morning of not waking up to an alarm clock, that one morning was, in Olivia’s estimation, worth it.

She had definitely needed those extra hours of sleep. Few as they were, she noted, as she glanced at the clock. Her marine-trained body clock would never let her truly sleep in, but it was capable of fudging the lines a bit.

The reminder of the previous night made her blush all over again and she pulled the sheet over her head as if that would hide her embarrassment from herself. As expected, and completely without surprise, the act was ineffective.

And there was the biggest reason Olivia had needed to sleep in; she and Kaidan had gone on a sci-fi vid marathon, culminating in ordering take out when they inevitably got hungry again. Instead of going to bed like rational human beings. They had even played rock, paper, scissors to see who would leave the apartment and get the food after a heated argument as to why each thought the other should go. Olivia had insisted that since it was _her_ place, _he_ should be the one to leave. Arching an eyebrow to imply he might get up to no good in her absence. Kaidan had, of course, argued the same. That since it was _her_ apartment _she_ was responsible for providing the food because he was a guest. That’s where the game came in, except the impasse hadn’t been resolved by rock, paper, scissors.

Perpetually upping the ‘two out of three’ to ‘three out of five’ and so on had all but demolished the effectiveness of the exercise entirely. So in the end, they’d agreed to go together. Both recognizing their competitive streaks weren’t exactly doing them any favors and in fact preventing them from easing their hunger. Thought Olivia had tried to sneakily duck back inside after he left ahead of her. Kaidan had predicted she would do as much and snatched her arm just as she spun around to step back inside, yanking her after him.

The memory of slamming into him, her hand grazing quite accidentally against his ass, made her blush all over again.

That memory was gonna haunt her for the rest of her life. Because by graze, she really meant that as she twisted towards him following the arm-yank, her hand got trapped between her body and his. His ass right in the palm of her hand which caused her to trip again as soon as she realized what she was touching, not to mention _using_ , to provide leverage to get her feet back under her.

She hadn’t been able to look him in the eye for a solid ten minutes after that, her cheeks burning every time she so much as glanced in his general direction. Kaidan was graceful enough to not say anything on the subject, except to offer an apology for knocking her off her feet. Or too embarrassed himself as there was no way he couldn’t have _not_ felt her touching him. Olivia hadn’t even possessed the presence of mind to crack a joke about how she thought she’d told him not make a habit of tripping her.

The bastard clearly hadn’t taken the words to heart. Rather guiltily, she didn’t mind.

The ass-incident, fortunately, did not prevent them from returning to her apartment, well past midnight by that point, to watch a truly terrible movie she’d fallen in love with during basic. The worst of sci-fi she’d ever had the pleasure of watching, it was so bad it was good. But still completely terrible. Kaidan had loved it, and Olivia had loved that he loved it.

She flipped over onto her stomach and buried her face in her pillow, as if the act would smother the blush out of her cheeks where the blanket had failed. At the very least, it wiped the stupid grin off her face.

Over the course of the evening and the movie marathon, they had ended up sitting on the middle of the couch together. Knees touching and good god it was so ridiculously fucking _stupid_ that she was this excited about their knees touching. Shoulders bumping against each other with each small shift in position. Fuck her, she had it _bad_. She groaned in frustration, the pillow dampening the noise.

It did absolutely nothing to fix her mood.

Olivia rolled back over and blew out a breath. She was a grown woman, a career military soldier, and an N7 marine. She’d survived the Blitz, years of reporters dogging her heels, and the beacon’s attempt to blast her mind on Eden Prime. _She could deal with a goddamn crush_.

Like any decently responsible and respectable adult. No matter how hard said crush was.

And for the love of everything good in the world, she could stop herself from thinking about Kaidan’s ass.

 

-O-

 

Ashley Williams nervously peered through the window into the coffee shop, and then ducked back around the corner. Checking the clock for the ten thousandth time that morning, knowing she was still early and that only thirty seconds had passed since she _last_ checked but couldn’t stop herself from checking anyway. Goddamn she was nervous. _Incredibly_ nervous.

She’d joked last night with herself about wanting to run into the guitarist again. Knew both Shepard and Alenko had known why she really wanted to return to the concert, though checking on Tali was, of course, a concern. Venturing thoughts about running into him some place, some time and going from there.

 _She hadn_ _’t expected it actually fucking happen_.

Tali was, of course, supremely drunk when Ashley returned to the concert. The quarian admitted to seven turian brandies in total, impressing even Williams. The turians liked their liquor hard. Not as hard as ryncol, but then, most people couldn’t regenerate their organs the way the krogan could. Turian brandy was just this side of destructive compared to ryncol - and the quarian had _still been on her feet_. Wrex saw to Tali’s care, exuding an air of beleagueredness Ashley was sure he didn’t actually feel as he escorted her back to the ship and into Doctor Chakwas’s capable hands.

And because in her heart of hearts, Ashley was a hopeless romantic, she stayed at the concert till the very end. Taking up residence on a stool at the bar so if anyone asked, she could plausibly reply that she was just enjoying a drink and the view. No ulterior motives. Definitely not waiting or hoping to see her guitarist.

During the final few songs of the last act, she did.

One moment she was sitting by herself, musing about what she couldn’t remember because the next moment, _he_ was sliding onto the stool next to her, a smile on his lips and asking for her name. He’d introduced himself as Micah Winters, a Second Lieutenant serving aboard the SSV Vukovar and offered her his hand. Which she accepted with a flutter in her heart, briefly wondering if she’d actually passed out from accidental consumption of ryncol until their fingers made contact. There was no way her imagination was _that_ good. No way it could accurately reconstruct the nervous shock of electricity that had suffused her entire body the moment his skin touched hers.

They sat up talking till the wee hours of the morning, about everything. As if they were old friends catching up and not two people who had just met. Sharing their life stories, and Ashley was a little surprised to realize how _comfortable_ she felt with him, so fast. She found herself telling him stories about her sisters, and shared amusing tales about his cousins because he was an only child. As the night progressed on and the conversation took a deeper, more personal route, Ashley told him about the Williams family name shadow following her career. How hard she had to work to break past the family name, and how Shepard was the first person to really give her a chance. Micah told her what it was like to transition while being an active career marine with too much ambition. ‘Too much ambition,’ he’d said. Loved his job too much.

They’d toasted to that last one, knocking back tequila together.

She confessed she didn’t doubt he’d find a way to make time for himself. He prodded her in the shoulder and said he knew for a fact that after this tour was over, she’d be going to the Academy. More shots called, toasted, and she found herself sitting as close to him as she possibly could, wondering what his lips would taste like.

They didn’t leave until the concert ended and the beer garden shut down. Instead of calling it a night, they migrated to another bar. Open only for another hour, but it was an excuse to spend more time together. Vacating only when _it_ closed and opting to walk around instead of leaving each others company. All the while talking and laughing and Ashley knew she’d been right from the moment she first saw him on stage hours earlier. That he wasn’t just gorgeous on the outside, he was gorgeous all the way through.

Then at the end of their walk when it was getting so late they could barely stay on their feet, Micah asked if she wanted to get coffee in the morning. Before either of their leave ended.

Of course she’d said yes, and when he suggested the place she was currently standing in front of, she said, “Perfect.”

And then he kissed her. Brazen, bold, all warm lips and tentative fingers and she melted into him. That kiss had been _perfection,_ if ever a kiss could be described as such. Tequila and chocolate on his lips and warmth radiated from him into her. She had wanted nothing more, in the moment, than for him to kiss her senseless - and she very nearly got her wish. Being granted two wishes in the same evening was, however, not in the cards. Micah broke the kiss off with a sigh and wished her a goodnight.

Ashley walked back around the corner with renewed vigor and anticipation, spotted Micah coming the other direction, and grinned. His face broke into a huge smile as soon as he saw her, jogging the last few meters between them.

“Hey!” he greeted her, rather shyly, and Ashley’s grin only got bigger.

“Hey yourself.”

He reached out for her hand, weaving his fingers between hers, and led her inside.

 

-O-

 

For the tenth time that morning, Kaidan spaced out in front of his coffee pot which, if it was capable of such emotions, would have begun feeling neglected. His mind was in a completely different place while one hand rested on the handle. Still having not poured a cup of coffee despite the fact that it had finished brewing fifteen minutes prior and he’d been standing there _the entire time._

Kaidan had come entirely too close at the end of the night to kissing Olivia. To the point where he’d actually swayed on his feet in her direction as they stood in the entryway, saying goodnight. He hoped to every god imaginable that she hadn’t detected a thing; that if she had noticed the swaying, she attributed it to general sleepiness. She was pretty tired herself with an adorably sleepy smile as she said goodnight that had nearly done him in and tipped him over the edge. So much so that when he realized he’d already started raising his hand to her cheek, he swooped it up to his neck instead. As if that was what he’d intended the whole time.

God help him, he almost wished he _had_ kissed her.

He had it _bad_ , Kaidan thought. _Real_ bad. A part of him itched to head over to her apartment right now and rectify what he was beginning to perceive as a mistake. The more rational part of him insisted that that might not go over so well and he should really get a better idea of what mutual attraction there was and how invested she might be in a maybe before he started in on kissing her within an inch of her life.

And it still didn’t entirely sound like a bad idea.

Kaidan shook his head and finally removed the carafe and poured himself a cup of coffee. _This_ was how he knew he was a goner, in way over his head. That calling his feelings a mere ‘crush’ was probably an understatement. The biggest one he’d made of the year. He _really_ liked her. Had been attracted to her from the beginning, before he knew who she was or what her name was, when they’d just been sitting two marines taking a moment of solitude on a bench together. Which was why he’d sputtered when he first saw her in the mess the next morning. And since it was just an attraction at that point, he opted to ignore his feelings and focus on the mission.

What a mistake that had been. Maybe if he’d paid more attention, he would have seen this coming a lot sooner.

What Kaidan really needed was to get a hold of himself. To remember that they were the two of them marines serving on the same posting, and that kissing her until she melted in his arms or he melted in hers would be a huge violation of the regs, no matter how fucking pleasurable the act would be. The fine line he was walking was precarious indeed.

Sitting up late watching terrible sci-fi movies with Olivia though… that was everything he could have ever asked for out of a proper date, and he’d stumbled into it without even trying. It was too easy to fall into friendly lines with her, too easy to forget she was his CO. Too easy to sit that much closer to her on the sofa, not even realizing he was shifting closer until they were practically touching. He’d almost fallen asleep right there he was so comfortable and at ease and just… _happy._

She made him feel the most normal he’d ever felt around another person, and that… that realization surprised him. He leaned against his counter, mouth having fallen open as that realization dawned on him. Cup off coffee abandoned once again.

Kaidan groaned and buried his face in his hands. What the hell was he gonna do?

 

-O-

 

“Favorite beer?” Ashley reiterated the question and Micah nodded. “A porter I’ve only found on Eden Prime, called the disgruntled espresso bean. What about you?”

“Disgruntled espresso bean?” Micah eyed her dubiously, a single eyebrow arched in question. Though he slid his fingers over hers from across the table.

“I didn’t say I liked the name, smartass.”

He barked a laugh. “Alright, fair enough. My favorite beer? Hmmm…” he rubbed his chin thoughtfully with his free hand, and Ashley’s eyes followed the trail of his fingers over his skin. Wishing those fingers were hers instead. “I like a good stout or dark ale with a smooth finish. When do you ship out?”

“My leave ends tonight. Don’t know if we’re shipping out tonight, but my freedom to run where I want ends at 2100 hours.”

“Ah,” the smile fell from his lips, only for a second, but it did. And that made her heart both soar and ache at the same time. “The Vukovar is undergoing some maintenance. She’s an old ship,” he shrugged, “I’m stuck here for the next week.”

“I wish I was stuck here for a week,” she replied without thinking - and immediately blushed.

Micah bit his lip. “You mean that?”

She ducked her head sheepishly. She _did_. She’d fallen for this guy hard and fast. An immediate attraction she’d never really experienced before; it was wild and new and exhilarating and terrifying all at once. She couldn’t get over how well they’d connected, so fast. How comfortable she felt in his presence, how much she suddenly wanted to spend all of her time with him. All the time she had to spare. She smiled and met his eyes. “I do.”

Micah cast his eyes down to the table, at their hands, fingers intertwined. His thumb running over her knuckles. “I uh, I want to ask you something, but there’s something else I should tell you first.”

“Okay.” She leaned forward, the smile slipping from her face just a fraction, her heart beating fast in her chest. God, she hoped it wasn’t negative. That he wasn’t gonna change his mind on her or say something like, ‘you know what? Forget it.’ That would crush her.

He chewed on his lip and pulled both her hands close to him. “I _really_ like you.”

Ashley’s heart fluttered in her chest as she leaned towards him conspiratorially. “I really like you, too.” Micah’s whole face lit up with a smile that could warm an entire planet. She squeezed his hands, a coy grin on her lips. “So what did you want to ask me?”

“Do you want to come back to my place?”

 

-O-

 

Olivia sat down on the edge of her bed, having showered and put coffee and muffins into her system. Doggedly wearing another dress even though she knew she’d have to change into uniform by the end of the day. That didn’t mean she had to _now,_ to sacrifice small pleasures. Plenty of time left in the day before she had to report back to duty and get back to work. To the mission.

The mission that was quickly giving her a permanent headache, though part of the blame for that could (and should) lie at the beacon’s feet.

She didn’t miss the fact that last night was possibly the best she’d slept in a long while. Didn’t miss that it was likely due to a certain someone’s presence late into the evening, providing companionable company she more than enjoyed.

Olivia lifted her cello off its stand, sliding her fingers of the edge of the wood. The previous evening she’d fumbled more than a few notes and missed a few beats on other songs, but either Kaidan and Kassy had graciously ignored those mistakes or they hadn’t noticed. She really was rusty - the last time she’d practiced was well over a month ago. The only reason her fingers weren’t sore was because she was a marine, she was sure. But Kassy had all but begged for a song, and in the end, Olivia hadn’t been able to say no.

What she had not expected was for Kaidan to show up early and join the audience. But then, considering the conversation from dinner, well… she hadn’t exactly not been against his presence, either. She knew that she could have easily changed her mind at that point and Kassy wouldn’t have said anything. For entirely selfish reasons she had, albeit foolishly so, hoped that it would help him see her in a new light. A light she had no business wishing he’d shine on her in the first place, but she wanted it nonetheless.

 _The Imperial March_ had been for him. Knew she’d hooked him when he leaned forward with boyish excitement, and her heart had sputtered in her chest, warmth suffusing her and Olivia had to look away lest she forget to actually keep playing. The only reason she picked the song was because she was sure he’d not only recognize it, but love it.

Olivia retrieved the bow and rested it across her knees as she positioned her cello in front of her. Remembering the way Kaidan had smiled at her in what could only be interpreted as pure delight while she’d played the night before. The way their eyes had met during that last song and in that moment, the whole world had shrunk down to just them and the song. She’d flubbed a note the minute their eyes connected, yet had been unable to look away once they had. Holding his gaze as the final note lingered in the air, like a whispered confession.

That was almost certainly foolish. The whole evening was foolish, she was foolish, and officially spending entirely too much time ruminating over the subject.

And just to drive the point home for herself, to let herself know how idiotic she thought she was being over a _crush_ , she picked up her bow and started playing the Sonata in G Minor for Cello and Piano, by Rachmaninoff. Pointedly not wondering if Kaidan played the piano.

 

-O-

 

Kaidan wasn’t terribly inclined to hang out with Joker in the moment, but since he didn’t have plans for the day and desperately needed to get out of his own head (lest he drive himself crazy over what if scenarios), he found himself walking towards the docks where Joker was hanging out. The pilot had promised a chess game on a holographic board with a view of all the incoming ships. Had even mentioned that Garrus might even stop by. It sounded pleasant enough so Kaidan hadn’t said no, even though a part of him wanted to.

That part of him was the part that thought it was a good idea to be reckless.

Joker was sitting in a prime location. He’d even set a little ‘reserved’ card on the table in front of him. Ostensibly to fight off people who might want to take up the surrounding seating. Kaidan shook his head at the sight though he couldn’t keep the smile off his face. Of _course_ Joker would do something like that.

“Have you heard from Ash?” Joker asked as Kaidan sat down across from him.

Kaidan set his cup of coffee on the table and activated the chess board. “Not this morning, no. Why?”

Joker shrugged. “She and Shepard are the only ones who haven’t replied.”

“Well,” Kaidan supplied, “she was up late at a concert, hunting for a gorgeous guitar player. Maybe she found him?”

Joker brushed his fingers against his cap, not quite succeeding at hiding the expression of surprise on his face. Kaidan chose to say nothing over it while Joker placed his first pawn on the board. Williams’s love life was her business, though he knew (and felt a little bad) that he’d just outed her to the rumor mill.

“There’s some rifle competition going on this morning, so if Garrus comes, he’ll be late.” Joker glanced up at him. “What about Shepard, you hear from her?”

Kaidan shook his head. He’d come here to _not_ think about the Commander, not be interrogated about her. “Not since last night.”

Joker’s mouth twitched, and Kaidan thought he must have let something slip in his voice he hadn’t intended to. All the more reason to change the subject. He moved his first pawn just to have something to do with his hands.

“What kind of rifle competition?”

Joker shrugged. “Assault rifles, I think. Wrex is going, too.” He stared across at Kaidan. “The turian and the krogan are _bonding._ ”

“Is that really so surprising?”

Kaidan was aware of the generalized tensions between the krogan and the turians, aware the krogan had every right to dislike the turians on the whole - especially since, as far as he knew, there’d never been any formal apology for the genophage. More of an anti-apology as the turian government insisted they’d done the right thing. But that didn’t necessarily mean that on an individual basis, a krogan and a turian couldn’t get along. Garrus was pragmatic, lenient for a turian. Brash, certainly, and as far as Kaidan knew, had never expressed the opinion that the krogan deserved the genophage. And Wrex… well, if the stereotype was that krogan were angry and stupid, Wrex was the antithesis of that statement. Wrex was downright dangerously intelligent. Dangerous because a lot of people tended to assume the krogan were anything but, an image most krogan didn’t care to dispel. Nor one Wrex did either, until it was too late. A lot of the other species had long since made up their minds over who and what the krogan were.

Kaidan shook his head. Delving into the depths of two thousand years of politics was a maddening endeavor at best. But at least it kept his mind off other things, however temporarily.

“I guess not,” Joker finally said. “So what’d you do last night?”

Kaidan sighed.

 

-O-

 

Once Olivia finished playing, she was surprised to see a flood of messages waiting for her on her omni-tool. Granted the sonata in its entirety took a bit to perform all the movements, but thirty minutes was still only thirty minutes. She had two messages from Joker, one from an Admiral asking for details about the Agebinium mission, and three from Kassy.

Olivia ignored the ones from Kassy for the time being, already guessing at their content just from reading the subject lines. Undoubtedly messages full of questions about her evening with Kaidan and pointed suggestions about what Kassy would believe Olivia should have done, which could probably be reduced to: go for it.

Olivia certainly wanted to. _Especially_ since she was sure Kaidan had nearly done just that the night before.

Clearly concentrating on the sonata had done absolutely nothing to get him off her mind.

She opened the message from the Admiral, skimmed the contents, and sent her the mission file. That would probably answer all the questions she had on the subject - though she undoubtedly already had access to the file to begin with. The messages from Joker were all variations of the same thing, informing Olivia of a general hang out at the docks with the crew playing board games. As nice as playing board games sounded, she wasn’t sure she wanted to get back to the docks so quickly. So she replied with a polite ‘thanks, but no thanks’, hinting at other plans even though she didn’t actually have any, and closed her ‘tool.

Well, not entirely true. She did have plans. Her plans simple consisted of her doing nothing. Nothing felt _good_ right now and the break from the mission to find Saren was more than welcome. Even though she suspected the former Spectre would not take a break. Finding him was like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Or in this case, one person in an entire galaxy. He’d gone to ground shortly after she was promoted to Spectre and so far nothing had surfaced about him.

That concerned her. Surely he had to have a base of operations somewhere. And where there was a base, there was a paper trail. In fact… she opened her ‘tool to make a note tracking down whatever paper record there was of Saren’s activities. Dig through the massive file the Spectre’s Office had passed off to her with all of the missions he’d completed in the past twenty plus years.

With that done, she finally read the messages from Kassy.

 

_To: Olivia Shepard_

_From: Kassandra Black_

_Re: Gorgeous marines_

_Olivia, you realize I_ _’m gonna demand you tell me everything, right? Like why the hell didn’t you let me know he was coming over to pick you up for a ‘not date’? I’m never gonna let this go, so you might as well answer the damn question._

 

_To: Olivia Shepard_

_From: Kassandra Black_

_Re: Re: Gorgeous marines_

_PS I forgot to tell you he gets the seal of approval. Did you see the way he was looking at you while you were playing the cello? Fucking stars in his eyes. If you don_ _’t do something about that, I’ll kick your ass for the rest of your life._

 

_To: Olivia Shepard_

_From: Kassandra Black_

_Re: Re: Re: Gorgeous marines_

_Last message, I promise. Don_ _’t think you can get away with not saying anything. I saw the way you looked at him, too. “Frat regs are meant to be broken.” I think you were the one who told me that, right? I’m giving you a pointed look right now, though you can’t see it._

 

Olivia sighed and hit reply to the last one. The day was not gonna let her _not_ think about Kaidan, it seemed. Maybe she _should_ put her uniform on, get back into the mentality of a soldier. She certainly needed something to get her mind off things. Maybe this was one of those times where it was better to go out than stay inside, if only for something to do.

 

_To: Kassandra Black_

_From: Olivia Shepard_

_Re: Re: Re: Re: Gorgeous marines_

_I know._

 

-O-

 

Ashley trailed a finger over Micah’s arm, the sheets of his bed curling around the both of them. She hated that a part of her was afraid that when she left Micah wouldn’t talk to her again. A ridiculous, anxiety prone part, and totally irrational, but that didn’t make the thoughts go away.

Micah’s hand was currently tangled in her hair as he gently massaged the back of her head. Fingers slow and warm and she closed her eyes, relishing in each small little tug against the strands of her hair. It felt _good_. She wanted to stay there all day. All week.

“That was certainly rash,” she murmured, opening her eyes to look up at him with a smile.

Micah chuckled and bit his lip. “I’ve certainly never been accused of being forward.”

Ashley trailed her hand up his neck, running her fingers over his chin. Just as she’d wished that morning. “I rather liked it,” she admitted, “and you only beat me to rash action by about two minutes.”

“Oh did I?” he asked, a devious smile on his lips.

Ashley scooted closer to him, shifting the sheets so she could feel his skin sliding against hers once more. His arms fell around her, one tucking beneath her to hold her closer and she pressed her face into his chest. Letting the warmth of his body suffuse her, wash over her. Wrapping her arms around him in kind. Some things in the world rarely felt so right, but he did. Everything about him did. As stupid and cliche as it sounded, she felt like she’d known him for years instead just one day. Felt like they’d been together for all those years, and not just for that morning.

She could very easily fall in love with him. Was probably already half way there, if she was honest with herself.

“Favorite weapon?” she murmured into his chest.

“Hmmm,” he considered, his voice rumbling through to her cheek and Ashley closed her eyes against the sound. “A lot of people swear by the Hydra because of its sheer stopping power - which is impressive, I’ll grant them that - but I prefer the Avalanche.”

“Avalanche has a phenomenal thermal management system, way better than the Hydra,” Ashley lazily agreed. “It’s not all about sheer damage output, that power won’t do you a lick of good if your gun overheats at the wrong moment.”

“Exactly!” Micah squeezed her in his arms. “Besides, if you _really_ want a shot that packs some punch-”

“Scram rail.”

“Scram rail,” he agreed, “coupled with a good heat sync mod to dispense the heat. Preferably Ariake’s scram rail, because while Avalanche makes a good gun, their heat sync leaves something to be desired.”

“Keep talking like that and I’m liable to propose, screw propriety,” Ashley laughed.

“The way to a marine’s heart is through her gun.”

“And good gun knowledge,” Ashley clarified. “If you like the wrong guns…”

“Deal breaker.”

“Mmm.”

Micah pulled her up into a kiss.

 

-O-

 

“I’m about eighty percent sure you cheated,” Joker said.

Kaidan grinned. “Just because I’m better at chess than you doesn’t mean I cheated.”

Joker flopped back in his seat and looked out the bay window. Towards the Alliance dreadnought currently stationed in the system. Too large to dock with Arcturus so it was sending frigates with its crew over instead. Kaidan reset the board while Joker stared out the window. The pilot had gone for two of three when Kaidan won the first match - and had just now lost the second. It wasn’t that Joker was a poor chess player, either. He was just impatient.

The game was, however, the perfect tempo for Kaidan. He preferred strategy games that allowed him time for consideration and careful planning. And he’d played a _lot_ of chess during his time at BAaT. They didn’t exactly have many games aboard jump zero, and chess was an easy one to program into an omni-tool and play anywhere. As was checkers, but that wasn’t exactly challenging.

“I’m sure if we were playing a flight simulator, you’d wipe me off the board,” Kaidan said.

Joker huffed a laugh. “Damn right I would.”

Kaidan spun the board around, changing the first player, and looked up, about to ask Joker if he wanted to go for three out of five when he spotted Olivia entering the docks. Still in civvies (he was, too, as were most of the Normandy crew he’d seen that day). This time wearing a dress covered in a sunflowers, sporting the same jean jacket as the day before. His mouth went dry at the sight, the question he’d been about to ask dying on his lips. And Joker twisted to see what had caught his attention, then turned back to face him. “Stare a little harder, I think a few people haven’t caught on yet.”

He punctuated his remark with a knowing smirk. Kaidan averted his eyes from Olivia and deactivated the chess board. Though he was completely aware of her trajectory, knew she was heading for them. Had all of ten seconds, maybe fifteen if she was slowed, to compose himself.

Of course he _knew_ he would run into her again. They did, after all, serve aboard the same ship. That knowledge had not prepared him for actually seeing her again, however. And he’d secretly hoped that the next time he saw her, they’d be in uniform. To mitigate his rising attraction and visually emphasize the boundaries that _should_ be in place.

“You know frat reg violations are basically a slap on the wrist these days, right?”

“I _will_ throw you across this platform.”

Throw with a capital T? He shook his head at the question.

Joker only laughed.

And finally, Olivia made it across the docks and slid onto the bench next to Kaidan, greeting them each in turn. Then she nodded her head at the chess board. “Who won?”

“Kaidan did, but,” Joker leaned forward, “I’m pretty sure he cheated.”

Olivia simply raised an eyebrow at the pilot, not even turning to look at him. “I really rather doubt that. Game?”

Joker raised his hands. “I’ve had enough of getting my ass kicked, but I’ll gladly watch you wipe the floor with his.”

For a reason Joker wouldn’t know, but Kaidan was acutely aware of himself, Olivia flushed. Not a lot, and maybe not noticeable to Joker if the pilot wasn’t looking for it, but Kaidan could see it in the tips of her ears and her hairline.

After a few seconds, she looked at him. “If Kaidan accepts?”

Kaidan reached out and twisted the board sideways so they could each access their pieces while sitting on the same bench, then activated it. “You seem so sure you’ll win,” he stated with a grin.

Olivia gave him a challenging smile and then spun the board around. “Just for that, I’ll let you move first.”

Neither noticed that as they settled in to play, they moved close enough their knees were touching again.


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for patiently waiting for this chapter, I know it's been a few weeks. Life kicked a bucket of wet poo at me and dealing with the fallout coupled with pulling extra hours at work meant I had zero energy to write. Things have evened out a bit, though. My kitty is doing better and we're optimistic for her prognosis (more about that on tumblr for the curious, under the tag 'pixel updates'). We should be back on track again, though. N7 day certainly helped to reinvigorate the writing spirit, and I'm pulling ahead again.
> 
> I just wanted to thank you all understanding and being awesome <3

Olivia woke up to an urgent beeping emanating from her terminal and shot out of bed. Her blankets spilled onto the floor around her but she left them where they fell. Blinking her eyes as she stumbled to the terminal then angled the camera up to her face as she hovered over the terminal instead of sitting down. Still blinking the sleep out of her eyes, Olivia scrubbed at them one last time before answering the call - and was surprised to see Kaidan on the other side. She barely managed to mask the surprise, her brain slow to catch up with the visuals it was presented. His shift started the same time as hers later that morning and his overnight deck watch wasn’t for five more days, barring any ground-side missions. “What is it?”

Olivia noted the disheveled state of his uniform and the missing gun straps. So he’d been woken same as her, just a little earlier. On call, then. And whatever he’d answered, he’d quickly decided to escalate it up the ranks.

“Sorry to wake you, Commander.” She waved him away. “Geth activity in the Armstrong Nebula.” His tone indicated it was more serious than the statement came across.

“I’ll be right up.”

She terminated the call, grabbed her uniform from her dresser, and stripped off her pajamas. Unceremoniously shoving limbs into their respective holes before grabbing the towel she kept near her bed to wipe the sleep off her face. Then she pulled her hair out of the bun and finger-combed it before grabbing the necessary ties and pins to put it back up and exited her cabin.

She was just finishing the first braid when she topped the stairs into the CIC and Kaidan turned greeted her at the command post. His eyes lingered in surprise on her hair, the greeting dying on his lips, and she realized she’d never had her hair down in front of him before. His eyes traveled the length of her hair where it terminated just above her waist before snapping back to her face.

She started in on the next braid. “Which system?”

“Two, actually: Vamshi and Tereshkova.” He seemed about to hand her the pad before glancing back at her hands still busy with her hair. “Neither are colonized, though the batarians have a vested interest in Vamshi.”

Reading between the lines, she understood the underlying message: they wouldn’t want to be seen if they could help it. Relations between batarians and humans were hostile enough as it was without them inciting a political incident by getting noticed. “We can’t go in hot.”

“Yes.” Kaidan rubbed at his eyes with one hand. “We have- had a listening drone stationed in Tereshkova. This is the last data burst we got before transmissions cut out.”

Kaidan twisted the pad in his hand to show her the video: a geth dropship firing a shot straight at the drone. The video terminated as soon the shot hit. “Rewind it?”

Kaidan complied, and she squinted at the ship. “That’s not the same ship Saren had at Eden Prime.”

“No,” he agreed, glancing down himself and freezing the video on the ship. “But it is large. Nothing in the quarian archives mention the geth having anything larger than a cruiser.”

Her braids done, she swept them all back and twisted her hair into a bun, pining it up. With her hands finally free, she moved towards the nearest galaxy map terminal, lips pursed at the information Kaidan had given her.

“Commander,” Sergeant Shaw snapped to attention next to her, “Navigator Groves is working out the fastest route to the Armstrong nebula, awaiting your order.”

“Thank you, Corporal,” she replied, and Sergeant Shaw nodded then sped back off to their post. “Is the XO awake?”

Kaidan shook his head, “No, ma’am.”

“You ready to get your boots dirty, Lieutenant?”

“Always, ma’am.”

Even without coffee.

She smiled to herself. Olivia did love a marine willing to dive into the deep end. She activated her terminal and quickly scanned through the information. Kaidan reiterating the salient facts he’d gathered before deciding to escalate the situation to her immediately instead of waiting till morning. A good thing, too. Regardless of whether the ship was the same one Saren had taken to Eden Prime, a geth occupation of this magnitude outside of the Perseus Veil could only mean that Saren was behind it. No geth presence outside the Veil in over three hundred years, and suddenly they were being found in places they shouldn’t be. It didn’t take a genius to put two and two together, not when she’d seen the geth actively working with Saren on Eden Prime. Not when the geth had been after Liara on Therum.

Whatever the geth were up to this far from their home cluster, Saren was elbow deep in it. She was sure of it.

So was Kaidan.

She rubbed at her eyes again, compiling a list of what needed done to get the mission planning underway. “I want planetary assessments for Vamshi and Tereshkova ASAP,” Olivia began listing off, “and known merc flight patterns and storage facilities. Any smuggling operations they’ve got going on have undoubtedly been interrupted.”

“They might not be willing to talk.”

“We won’t necessarily need them, too,” she assured him.

Keeping an ear to the ground on mercs that had been using Armstrong as a post would be information enough. Mercs were never happy when smuggling rings were interrupted, and she knew from personal experience that Armstrong was a favored hub for dealings that entered Citadel space. Close to the terminus systems, yet far enough away from the Attican Traverse to be relatively safe from Alliance patrols. Far enough that they usually got word on Alliance raids before they happened, unless the Alliance sent in a specialized team.

“Huh,” Kaidan murmured.

Olivia dropped the contemplative finger from her chin and glanced up at him. “What?”

His brow was furrowed as he considered whatever was on his mind. Eyes looking at-but-not-at her. “The drone was in Tereshkova,” he said, and Olivia nodded, not entirely sure if he even noticed the action, “There are five systems in the Armstrong Nebula, and Tereshkova isn’t the closest to the relay system.”

“You think the geth might have presence in the other systems?”

“I think we’ll require a heavy dose of luck lest we find ourselves taking on a geth armada without support.”

She considered his statement, having thought the same thing herself. Hong was closer to Vamshi than Tereshkova and while that _could_ be the point - occupying systems further out from the relay system, she rather doubted that was the case. “We’re going to want a second ship and ground team for this op.”

“Agreed,” Kaidan murmured, finally looking at her and not through her. “I’ll go wake the XO.”

“Could you grab me a cup of coffee on your way back up?”

Kaidan gave her a tired smile and ran his fingers through his hair. “Sure.”

The ‘sure’ implied he’d be getting one for himself as well.

“Navigator,” Olivia called out once Kaidan exited down the stairs and she’d gotten the image of his fingers in his hair out of her mind.

The Navigator trotted around the galaxy map. “Ma’am?”

Olivia twisted the terminal screen so the both of them could see it. “Show me the route you have mapped out to get to Armstrong. I’d like to be there by afternoon if that’s at all possible.” Navigator Groves tilted her head towards the terminal, and Olivia stepped away from it, allowing Groves access. Olivia turned her head to Sergeant Shaw while the Navigator brought up her map, standing a few meters away at their post, and said, “Get Captain Anderson on the line.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Shaw replied. “Where would you like to take the comm?”

Olivia glanced at the terminal she’d handed over to Groves, then peered around the galaxy map console and nodded at a vacant terminal on the other side of Groves. “There’s fine.”

Shaw held up a headset to their ear, connecting the signal, and Olivia waited next to the terminal for the connection. After a few minutes, Shaw glanced up at her. “Connecting now, Commander.”

“Thank you, Corporal.”

Olivia activated the interface on her end, accepting the headset from Shaw just as the Captain appeared on her screen. “Captain,” she greeted him with a salute.

Anderson’s lips thinned at the formal greeting - he’d never been a man for formalities - but he couldn’t exactly say anything about it while she was in the CIC. A fact she’d known and exploited, which she indicated with a small smile of her own.

“ _Commander,”_ Anderson said, _“Why the hell are you waking me up so goddamned early?”_

“Geth activity in the Armstrong Nebula,” she answered. “Multiple systems. Two confirmed: Tereshkova and Vamshi, Alenko suspects more.”

“ _The batarians-”_

“Have a vested interest in Vamshi, yes sir.”

“ _What do you have?”_

“A video,” she answered, and sent him the file. “A surveillance drone in Tereshkova. The geth destroyed it, but not before it recorded a number of ships. Including a big one.”

“ _The same one from Eden Prime?”_

“No, sir.”

Anderson let out a thoughtful ‘hmm’ as he watched the video she’d sent him. _“You want back up for this.”_

“Yes, sir.”

At least one ship with a competent crew. Though one ship was probably all she could realistically expect. Anything more would be seen as waging an all out war with the geth on one end, with the Alliance establishing a military presence in an unclaimed system; and on the other end, it could be construed as a strategic political maneuver, exploiting a geth occupation to occupy an unclaimed system and therefore thwart the batarians's vested interest. All under the guise of ‘doing good’, which would be treated as an act of war against the hegemony. Knowing the media, it would be made out as both, the Alliance would garner a significant amount of political flak, and Olivia herself would be benched at _best_ , court-martialed at worst. Either way, her career in the Alliance would be dead if she insisted on anything more than one ship.

Two ships could go in without attracting too much negative political attention.

She pinched the bridge of her nose. She hated politics, hated that a part of her job was factoring those politics in.

“ _I’m connecting you to Admiral Hackett,”_ Anderson said, and Olivia nodded, _“He’s been briefed on your mission, and knows the details.”_

The way Anderson said ‘details’ meant Hackett was familiar with more than just the details. Reading between the lines, Anderson was saying Hackett had his trust, that the Admiral was aware of the term ‘reapers’ and likewise believed the threat to be more than a fanciful tale that Saren was using to manipulate the geth.

They’d still yet to account for the ship that been at Eden Prime - that alone was all the proof Olivia herself needed on the subject. But coupled with the images that burned in her brain, sometimes with enough clarity for her to almost understand, she was positive the reapers were more than a myth generated out of geth code.

After a few seconds, Admiral Hackett’s face appeared on her screen. “Admiral,” she greeted him with a salute.

The Admiral waved her away. _“Commander Shepard.”_

“We have geth activity in the Armstrong Nebula, Admiral,” Olivia cut straight to the chase, briefing him on the information Kaidan have given her a few minutes prior.

The Admiral nodded as she relayed the facts as succinctly as possible, his face stoic, but she didn’t know him all that well. But not for nothing was she an N7, and not for nothing had she climbed the ranks relatively swiftly. She could see the Admiral analyzing the information she sent him swiftly in the way his eyes shifted in focus as he listened to her. Could see that Anderson was right that Admiral Hackett was the optimal choice for mission support requests.

“ _Commander Hindly is in a nearby system, just a few jumps away,”_ Hackett said once she’d finished. _“Patrolling, but we can divert the Alalla for the time being. How long do you think this will take?”_

“My Head of Marine Detail believes the geth may have spread to the other systems.”

Hackett considered her statement. Sharp eyes assessing her. The Admiral would have undoubtedly done his research on her, too. Olivia rather suspected every Admiral in the Alliance fleet had at the very least brushed up on her service record the moment she was appointed as humanity’s first Spectre. _“You wouldn’t mention that if you didn’t believe it yourself.”_

Olivia nodded, conceding the point: Kaidan had her support. “If he hadn’t voiced the suspicions, I would have.”

“ _They’re in Tereshkova?”_ the Admiral asked.

The question was rhetorical, but Olivia nodded nonetheless.

“ _I’ll contact Commander Hindly immediately and reassign him to you for as long as you need him.”_

“Thank you, Admiral.”

“ _This is your operation, Shepard,”_ Hackett continued, _“Get the geth out of that nebula.”_

“Will do, sir.”

“ _Good hunting.”_

Olivia saluted, and the Admiral cut the channel.

 

-O-

 

“I haven’t been to the Armstrong Nebula in twenty years,” Liara said, eyes glued to the map in front of her. “There are not a lot of archaeologically significant dig sites; what few do exist have been cataloged years ago. I am afraid my expertise in this area will be lacking.”

Olivia pinched the bridge of her nose, leaning back in her seat in the comm room. Since Kaidan had woken her three hours past at 0300 hours, she’d been in that room, pouring over information while waiting for Commander Hindly to make contact. The Admiral hadn’t given her the specifics of the mission he was on, just that he was nearby and available. Olivia didn’t know much about Hindly, having only met the man once - but she was tangentially aware of his career. If only because a large portion of it had been made public in much the same manner hers had been. Except where she got the war hero treatment by the media, complete with the hooplah and celebrations, Hindly got the sole survivor tag-line. A tragic story accentuated by perseverance. Another type of marine one should aspire to be.

“The Gagarin system,” Liara continued, unaware she’d fallen silent in the first place, “has an underground Prothean bunker I imagine mercenaries would favor for smuggling operations.”

“And if the mercenaries like it,” Williams started, but Wrex finished for her, “The geth will like it.”

“That’s one way to get supplies,” Kaidan mused, and everyone huffed a small laugh.

“Certainly the fastest way, LT.”

“ _Commander,”_ Joker voiced over the comms, cutting the laughter, _“The SSV Alalla has made contact. Commander Hindly is awaiting your orders.”_

Olivia nodded though Joker couldn’t see it and stood up, relieved to stretch her limbs as she walked over to the comm pad and pressed the connection button. Commander Hindly appeared before her on the comm pad and the camera scanned her in turn.

“ _Commander Shepard,”_ he greeted her, _“Congratulations, of course. Though we always seem to meet under unpleasant circumstances.”_

“Nature of the job,” she replied, though felt the sting of what he meant.

Commander Drew Hindly had been stationed at Akuze.

The only survivor from a thresher maw attack that had wiped out his unit. That was the first and only time Olivia had met Hindly in person, two weeks after he was extracted. Olivia had taken leave as soon as she heard the unit on Akuze had been slaughtered, using the time to visit an old friend from the Cold Harbor, Glenn Delgado. Because someone Glenn had loved very much had been in that unit. Another friend of hers, too, though she hadn’t been close with Lian Jones. Their former Head of Marine Detail from the same ship. Also known as Boomer.

Following a promotion shortly after the Blitz, Lian had been transferred to Hindly’s squad; and Lian and Glenn had finally given in to their mutual feelings.

She still remembered the conversation she had with Glenn two days before she left for Elysium, when he’d wistfully said he wished he was a bit more like her.

Losing Lian was not what he had meant. Nor was it something she would have ever wished on anyone.

Olivia knew better than most what it was like to experience loss of that magnitude, having experienced it more times than one person should reasonably be expected to. Olivia was also the only person Glenn hadn’t turned away at the door - a fact she’d learned months later - because when he answered her knock, she didn’t say anything. Instead opting in for the hug, the kind of hug you give when there are no words to say because no word in existence would suffice. A feeling she knew all too well, and which, at the time, still burned within her as she’d been in the same position not even a year prior. Mourning Kelila.

That visit was the only time in her life Glenn hadn’t pressed all her buttons, to see how far he could push her. Testing the limits of her boundaries. Instead, eyes glistened with unshed tears and he’d looked up at her after an extended silence and said, “I think I understand why you don’t always go outside.”

That had made her heart hurt for him in ways that were almost unimaginable to express. Made her hurt for herself, too, because it was true.

“This isn’t a house call,” she continued.

Hindly nodded. He remembered, too. Had been surprised by her presence when he called on Glenn and she was the one who answered the door. Olivia greatly respected that despite everything he’d been through on Akuze, he took the time to visit the families of each person under his command.

“ _My pilot tells me we’re two relay hops away from your position.”_

“How long will that take?” she inquired. They were well ahead of schedule, but she was feeling the press of time on the mission nonetheless. She wanted to get the drop on the geth for once, to nip their operations in the bud before they had a chance to really get going instead of mopping up the after effects of their mess. Or worse.

“ _Five hours. Next relay system has a queue. I can jump ahead most of it with Alliance clearance codes, but half the ships there are military already.”_

“I can send my Spectre code if you like,” she offered.

Hindly arched an eyebrow, then said, _“Yes, thank you.”_

She glanced over her shoulder at Kaidan. “Lieutenant?”

“On it,” he replied, already turning towards the door to head to the cockpit where his comms station was.

“ _I’ll be in touch, Commander.”_

Olivia nodded and saluted, then cut the channel.

 

-O-

 

Kaidan sat across from Tali in the mess, having taken over an entire table with datapads and charts, all of which the quarian was currently pouring over.

Following a brief discussion of the geth ship they’d seen on the video early that morning, Olivia had given him the assignment of sitting down with Tali and getting whatever information from her he could concerning the geth fleet. A lot of the information was three hundred years out of date. The hard information at least. Tali confirmed the flotilla occasionally sent drones into the Veil to get a glimpse of what they could, but it was rarely enough to update their information accurately. Most of the new intel was speculation based on whatever they’d managed to capture.

The geth always found the drones with rapidity.

“I’m sure you know the flotilla desires to return to the homeworld,” Tali said, picking up the thread from their earlier conversation.

Kaidan nodded.

“I wasn’t on any of the committees involved in those operations.” Tali looked up at him. “I’m still on my pilgrimage, proving that I am an asset to quarian society. I was seeking information about the geth that we could use, about how they’ve evolved.”

“Well,” Kaidan said when she fell silent, “this mission will undoubtedly help with that.”

“The thought had crossed my mind,” she replied, dryly. “What I’m trying to say is, even we don’t know the full extent of the size of the geth fleet, or what they have. All I can do is give you the same history lesson we all got growing up. What ships were left behind, what resources the geth have access to, and our best projections as to their size.”

Kaidan leaned forward, picking up a starchart for the Veil. “I rather doubt we’re dealing with the full might of the geth. They’ll leave ships and platforms behind to protect the Veil. A third of their number at best. And that’s if they concentrate their force in one area, which I doubt.”

“A third of the geth is still a formidable number.” Tali forcefully sat back down and rolled her shoulders. “We would have known if a fleet of geth ships that size left the Veil.”

“You have been gone a while,” Kaidan amended.

“Trust me,” Tali leaned forward and poked the table with a talon, “ _Every_ quarian still part of the flotilla would know if that many geth ships left the system. It would be our best chance to take back the homeworld, and the Admiralty would not let that opportunity pass by. Any quarian on their pilgrimage would be called back, as would those on missions for the flotilla.”

“What number would be…” Kaidan waved his hand in the air, searching for the right word, “Unremarkable?”

Tali threw up her arms. “ _Any_ number would be remarkable, because the geth have never left the Veil. But I see what you’re really asking: how many ships _could_ leave before the quarians decided to take action.”

She tapped her talons on the tabletop, tilting her head this way and that as she examined the star charts spread out in front of them, and Kaidan patiently waited for the answer. He suspected any dreadnoughts leaving the system would be significant news. In fact, with the ship they’d seen on Eden Prime, Kaidan rather doubted that geth would have needed a dreadnought. He also suspected, and knew Olivia thought the same judging from a few of their conversations, that the ship they’d seen on Eden Prime wasn’t geth. Be it an old geth ship piloted out of the Veil or a new ship constructed after the fact. It was too… unlike anything else. Too, for lack of a better word, _alien_.

Olivia had indicated it was a reaper ship. Too bad they didn’t know what a reaper _was_ yet. He wasn’t exactly looking forward to when they found out, if what the geth believed about the reapers exterminating the entire Prothean empire was true. Any species capable of that level of destruction was to be feared. Even ‘feared’ didn’t sound strong enough a word.

Tali made a noise of frustration across the table and muttered something he didn’t quite catch about ‘my father’ and ‘discussions’. Kaidan gathered her father was heavily in the political process judging from the words he scraped together, but not much else.

“Updates?”

Kaidan lifted his head from the table as Olivia rounded the corner, looking both tired and keyed up. She headed straight for the coffee pot, and he seriously considered doing the same. Neither of them had gotten much rest the night before and had been up since he first woke her.

“Kaidan wants to know how many geth ships could leave the Veil before the quarians took advantage of the situation.” Tali dropped a pad on the table and picked up another, looking for all the world as if she were frowning at it. “I’m thinking about it.”

Olivia hovered behind him, peering over his shoulder at the scattered mess. “Anything else?”

“The number of ships leaving the Veil isn’t indicative of the number of geth who’ve left the Veil,” Kaidan replied and handed her the pad of notes he’d taken from Tali’s Brief History of the Geth.

A history which had not actually been brief at all, but which he’d listened to nonetheless, noting down anything he felt would be relevant to the mission. Under any other circumstances, he would have enjoyed hearing more about the geth war.

“Commander Hindly just entered the system,” Olivia said.

Kaidan slipped off the bench to get a cup of coffee, and Olivia took his place as she started skimming the pad. He poured himself a cup. “Is he coming aboard, or will we be organizing through the comm room?”

“He’s coming aboard. Joker and the Alalla’s pilot are coordinating air lock docking procedures now.” She glanced up at him. “The Alalla has a shuttle, but we don’t have the space.”

“That shuttle will come in handy.”

“Seven.”

“What?” he asked at the same time Olivia said, “Only seven ships?”

“Based on the ships we were forced to leave behind when we left Rannoch and the last updated figures I overheard from my father, seven ships. Most of the ships we left behind were our larger military vessels. A few dreadnought sized, though without the weapons capabilities.”

“Cruisers, then.”

“That’s probably been changed since.” Kaidan sat back down next to Olivia.

Tali leaned across the table, eying them both in turn. “This is based off what I know my _father_ would do under these circumstances. Some of the admiralty are very cautious and would prefer half the geth fleet gone before we did anything. They are a minority, but…”

“But that still could push the number up. Seven is a baseline estimate, then?”

“Yes,” Tali answered, “Seven is the number of ships that could leave the Veil, for sure, that wouldn’t tip off the admiralty and have quarians returning to the flotilla whether or not they had completed their pilgrimage. Rannoch would still be too heavily defended.”

“How many geth could each ship contain?” Kaidan asked.

“That’s an answer we’d _both_ like to have. Thousands definitely, maybe millions. Geth programming is very complex, they’ll need servers to contain them when they aren’t in platforms.”

Olivia shifted on the bench, bumping into him, but she didn’t seem to notice as she leaned towards the quarian. “What happens when you take out a platform?”

Tali tilted her head to the side. “What do you mean?”

Kaidan, however, thought he saw what she was getting at. “Do they return to the server somehow?”

Olivia nodded. “Like cylon resurrection?”

“God, I hope not,” he mused, and Olivia huffed next to him. As close to a laugh as he was gonna get.

“We didn’t program that into them, no. As far as we know, any geth contained in a platform are killed when that platform is destroyed. My field tinkering with their memory cores backs that hypothesis up.”

“I’m taking that as a no, then.”

Tali nodded. “All the knowledge I have of the geth is abstract, Shepard. If I was a few years older…”

“Then you wouldn’t be here, and we would know even less,” Olivia finished for her, and Kaidan nodded in agreement. “Limited knowledge is better than no knowledge.” She turned to him. “Can I take this?”

“I have a duplicate of the notes on my ‘tool already.”

“Thanks.” With that, she stood up from the table. “Once Hindly’s on deck, I want everyone in the briefing room.”

“Aye aye, ma’am.”

He watched her leave then turned back to find Tali staring at him. Or at least, what _felt_ like staring. It was hard to tell with the tinted visor blocking a clean view of her face. Regardless, he couldn’t stop himself entirely from shifting in his seat. “Where were we?”


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the author is still trash and manages to add fluff to a mission

“You really think handing Wrex over to Hindly was a good idea, ma’am?” Williams asked, breaking the extended silence of scouting the base.

Olivia glanced at the Chief squatting on the cold ground next to her, the wind whipping between them, kicking up a fine cloud of silica that Olivia just _knew_ would track everywhere. “Commander Hindly needed a biotic, but didn’t want to strip me of my second.”

Williams set down her own binoculars to meet her eyes. “Hard to believe there aren’t enough biotics for each ship in the Alliance.”

Olivia shrugged and brought the scope back up to her eyes. A question that wasn’t without merit, though diving into the intricacies of human biotic and Alliance relations was a tricky subject she barely felt comfortable discussing with Kaidan. And that only because he’d broached the subject with her in the first place. What she did know rankled her - that there were ships that hoarded biotic units. Practically, she knew an entire unit of biotic marines would be a formidable force. Personally, she thought an entirely biotic unit could too easily succumb to complacency, if they weren’t guided by the right type of command. She rather thought more Kaidans should be involved in those units.

She resisted the urge to shift on her feet. Olivia didn’t think that because she _liked_ him. Her personal feelings about the man had no bearing or effect on her professional opinion of him. On this matter, only her professional opinion mattered.

“That just means I can continue to give the LT a hard time.”

Olivia snorted.

“You think Wrex is doing fine on another ship?”

Olivia rotated again to look at the Chief again. “I wouldn’t have sent him if I didn’t think he couldn’t play ball.”

Williams shook her head fiercely. “I’m not worried about _him_ , Commander. I’m worried about _them_.”

Well, Olivia mollified herself, that was a turn of events. She knew Williams was making an effort to work past her own feelings, but hadn’t assumed that Williams would actually work towards _befriending_ any of the non-humans. “Commander Hindly knows how to play ball, too.”

Williams rolled her shoulders and adjusted her position. “Never met the guy, so I’ll take your word for it. Nothing on the scanners.”

Olivia returned to scouting the base. After much deliberation over how to approach the geth incursion in the Armstrong Nebula, they’d eventually agreed to work each system together in a loop. Starting with the relay system: Vamshi. Their initial scans of the system indicated the geth had set up a small outpost on the planet closest to the sun, Maji. As soon as they were within visual range of the surface, Olivia could see why. None to few box-set merc bases littered the surface, indicating this was a favorable planet for illicit activities. They’d already discovered the remains of what she could only surmise were hunting kills on their way to the geth outpost. If this had been a survey mission, she’d have taken the time to mark their locations for later retrieval.

This base, just like the previous two they’d scouted, was empty. No guards posted outside, watching the horizon. No turrets or heat signatures. No signs of activity outside of the shifting silica in the wind on this godforsaken barren planet.

Her HUD flashed a radiation warning - their allotted time outside before the radiations shields on their suits fizzed out was almost up. “Time to head back to the Mako.”

Williams rose immediately and gathered up the gear. Olivia followed quickly behind, slapping a hand against her scope to knock out as much silica and sodium as she could before returning it to its holster.

“We need better radiation shields,” the Chief mused as she carved a path back towards the Mako.

Olivia could only grunt in agreement. The radiation from the binary stars coupled with Maji’s proximity to said stars was crippling their ability for extended surveillance. She was glad she _hadn_ _’t_ opted to wear her scouting armor; it would never have lasted under the blast of radiation, never mind the intense cold of the planet. At least her suit was keeping her warm.

She’d upgraded that component after Agebinium. Nearly freezing to death, pleasant company or no, was not exactly what she’d call ‘within the lines of mission parameters’; though N training had certainly gotten her _used_ to it more than times than she could count. Hadn’t stopped her from shivering near the end, though at least she had the glorious position of not shivering _first_.

The Mako rounded into view and she tapped the door to let the others inside know she wanted in. Two minutes later, the light outside cycled green and the door opened.

“Time to switch?” Kaidan asked.

She passed him the scope. “Yes. You’re cleared to move in and sweep the base.” Garrus scrambled out after Kaidan, followed quickly by Tali. “No external activity of any kind. Did Commander Hindly check in?”

“His squad ran into a couple of automated turrets, but the base they marked is quiet. Commander Hindly is moving onto the next one.”

“They take any damage?”

Kaidan shook his head. “Shuttle pilot has a solid head on her shoulders and quick reflexes.”

She clapped him on the shoulder. “Stay warm out there.”

He saluted and headed off, Garrus and Tali on his heels. She watched them trek out for a few moments before climbing into the Mako behind Williams when the Chief cleared her throat meaningfully. “You may want to freeze your ass off, ma’am, but I rather value mine.”

Olivia cast her a long-suffering glance and slammed the door behind her. The pressurization system kicked in automatically and once the cabin was pressurized, she unclipped the seals to her helmet and breathed a sigh of relief. Williams did the same thing next to her.

“Blessed breathing space.”

She only took a few moments to collect herself before sliding into the navigator’s seat and activating the panel. Williams hovered just off her shoulder. “How many more bases after this one?”

“We’ve only got one more to clear, two total left. Unless the geth are holed up in the base Commander Hindly is on his way to scout, this one,” she stabbed the point on her map, “is our target.”

“What are the chances of him checking in with the all clear before the LT’s squad is back?”

Olivia tapped the console, evaluating the distance Hindly would have to cover to arrive at his final destination and scout the area. With the advantage of shuttle that wasn’t getting its wheels stuck in silica, he was making better time between targets. “If it’s live, we’ll hear soon enough.”

 

-O-

 

The base was just as quiet inside as it was out, which Kaidan noted in his logs for the report later. A _long_ report, judging from the number of bases they’d covered during the past several hours. Getting a second ground team to work with them had absolutely been the right call, otherwise it would take them two days, at minimum, to clear each planet if they were all like this one.

He _was_ surprised there hadn’t been any geth dropships in the system. Even if they were trying to keep a low profile, he’d have expected to encounter at least one. And though Olivia hadn’t outwardly expressed any indication of surprise either, he’d picked up on a few indicators that meant she had been just as well. The ever so subtle shift of the brow upwards when the report came in that LIDAR was clear. Quickly followed by a narrowing of the eyes as if she suspected something fishy about the situation. As if she were mentally preparing for a trap.

It _was_ odd. Kaidan could only see two options really: the geth had only just started their incursion into the Armstrong Nebula, meaning they had a very good chance of nipping their operations in the bud quickly and decisively; or the lack of ships indicated one of the other systems was the true ‘powerhouse’ for their operations, and they were attempting to keep their operations discreet. He rather thought the second option was more likely, as the geth wouldn’t want to spread themselves too thin. It also spoke to a formidable tactical mind.

The only question was: which system?

“Clear,” Tali checked in over the comms. She was rapidly picking up on the lingo. “Even the consoles are dead here.”

Unsurprising, Kaidan mused, as he shined his light over the broken power generators the next room over from Tali. No way to easily fix them either without using half of his fab unit supplies. A notion that wasn’t exactly appealing to him; why fix something to just essentially gift wrap it for the mercs? He had no interest in making the lives of mercenaries and slave traders easier, especially considering the bodies they’d passed on their way in. _Brutal_. Almost as if they’d been killed for sport.

Only years of training kept him from shuddering in horror.

He exited the generator room and met up with Tali, continuing their advance down the hallway.

“Well,” Garrus called out ahead of them, though he’d activated his comm channel, too, “If the geth were here, I can see why they left.”

Kaidan trotted up the corridor and fell in next to the turian to see what he was looking at - and immediately understood. A giant hole in the ground inside the hangar took up over half the ground. Not the result of any explosion or blast, either; there weren’t any scorch marks near the edge nor any indicators of shrapnel. He swept his omni-tool up and scanned the perimeter while Tali activated a small drone and sent it down inside. Not a bad idea…

His omni-tool beeped with the analysis. “It’s a _sinkhole_.”

Garrus took a step back from the edge. “Must have been a bad day for any mercs inside this bunker.”

“We’re not gonna find anything here,” Kaidan agreed.

Tali’s drone returned back to the surface and the quarian deactivated it. “The sinkhole is eighty-five meters deep.”

“Mercs never do soil analysis,” Garrus shook his head, and Kaidan barked a laugh. “Fortunately for us.”

Kaidan moved his scans to the walls. Though he wasn’t equipped with all the right software, he had enough to get by on a structural integrity analysis to make sure the base wouldn’t come down on their heads. The results weren’t promising. Fissures detected in a lot of the joints, walls leaning at odd angles. One earthquake, and they’d be buried in rubble.

“Let’s head back to the Mako,” he ordered. “This place is a tomb.”

Garrus and Tali were already at the entrance leading to the hangar, having stepped as far away from the sink hole as they could. Tali fidgeted a little as Kaidan approached them, and said, “The sinkhole is still active. Nika’s rudimentary soil analysis confirmed the ground beneath most of the hangar is unstable. It could take more of the base down if it shifts.”

“Shit,” Kaidan murmured, and Garrus echoed the sentiment.

They were out of the base in two minutes, back at the Mako in fifteen.

Olivia and Williams were already outside, waiting for them.

“Get restless, Shepard?” Garrus asked.

The Commander dodged the question, though Kaidan noticed the corner of her lips twitch up in a smile before she directed her gaze to him. “You’re back early.”

“Didn’t fancy becoming Maji food.”

“There was a _sinkhole_ ,” Tali supplied before Kaidan could offer a full explanation, “right in the middle of the _base_.”

“A sinkhole?” Williams looked questioningly at Kaidan, as if not quite believing what she was being told.

Kaidan couldn’t entirely fault her for the dubious gaze as there’d been little sign of geological activity on Maji. The planet was positively frozen. So he shrugged and said, “There is a lot of silica blowing around. Ground beneath the base was unstable; caved in at some point. It’s empty.”

As if to emphasize his point, a particularly strong gust of wind blew a ton of the stuff around them, the air whipping between cracks and limbs. Olivia braced herself against the Mako in the gust, reminding Kaidan just how slight of stature she was. It was hard enough to almost push him around if he hadn’t braced himself.

“What’s the next move?” he asked.

“We haul ass to Commander Hindly’s location. He checked in five minutes ago; those turrets he encountered previously turned out to line a makeshift road, though the road only became clear once it hit the mountain range.” She ducked into the Mako, gesturing for Kaidan to follow after a quick order to the others they had exactly one minute to stretch their legs before she wanted them inside and ready to go. She squished into the passenger seat, scooting far enough over so he could perch on the edge to see the console if he wanted. He did, doing his best to ignore how close they were.“You’ve got your navigation cut out for you on this one.”

“And you your driving,” he commented, examining the map. The terrain between them and Hindly was ugly. The weather scanners, connected to the Normandy’s main computer and aerial view, showed a marked increase in wind speeds picking up in the valley.

“No offense, Shepard,” Garrus said as he opened the driver side door, “but you’re not driving on this one.”

 

-O-

 

Garrus slipped into the driver seat without another word, and Olivia stared past Kaidan at him - until she became aware of Tali and Williams crawling into the back. “Excuse me?”

“I’m with Garrus on this one,” Kaidan said before the turian could reply. Though Kaidan didn’t quite meet her eyes, studiously examining the map in front of him.

But before she could offer her protests, Williams chimed in, too. “Me too, ma’am. You’re liable to ruin the tires on this slippery shit and I’d rather not walk the rest of the way or sit through Mako repairs.”

“And I don’t want to repair the Mako in this weather,” Tali added.

Olivia stared at all of them; well, mostly Kaidan and Garrus as she couldn’t see the two women in the back with Kaidan blocking the view. She _did_ fix the two men with accusing glares. “Traitors, all of you.”

Her words didn’t carry any real bite, though she grumbled that maybe she should have handed _all_ of them over to Hindly and kept Wrex for herself. At least _he_ _’d_ appreciate her driving. She also might have threatened to let Wrex drive the next mission, though she was sure her ground team would probably mutiny over that. Stuff her in the back, which, she had to admit, she’d rightfully deserve if she carried through with it.

Williams’s head appeared just off Kaidan’s shoulder. “Better strap in Commander.”

To emphasize her point, Williams tugged on the safety strap at Kaidan’s shoulder.

Olivia stared at it, then the Chief, then Kaidan. The Lieutenant simply shrugged before taking hold of the strap and reaching across her to access the other shoulder strap and wrangled them to work with two people. The one time a regular passenger vehicle seatbelt would have been better suited to their needs as Kaidan had to shift the harness around to hold both of them. When that was done, he had the audacity to pat her on the leg as if placating her. “Good thing you’re small,” he murmured.

“Good thing we _fit_ ,” she amended. “You can bet your ass I’m gonna be a backseat navigator now that you’ve shoved me in a corner.”

Garrus started the Mako and the engines whirred to life. The automatic suspension systems adjusting the Mako’s height to counteract the wind, which was a relief.

“You sat there voluntarily.”

“I didn’t realize it was a permanent seating arrangement.”

“Let me do my job, Commander,” Kaidan teased, “and I promise I won’t kick you out of the driver’s seat next time.”

“You better promise to not let anyone else kick me out either if you want me to be a complacent passenger seat companion.”

Kaidan activated the navigation panel, zooming in on their position as Garrus put the Mako into gear. “I would except I promised my mother I’d never lie.”

“You’re absolutely fired.” Lacking better means to make her feelings physically known, she bumped his knee with hers and elbowed for an inch more of space. “Unequivocally.”

“Spirits, you two bicker like an old married couple.”

Williams and Tali _both_ snorted in the backseat, and Olivia’s cheeks heated. She was suddenly very grateful for the cover the helmet provided. “Just drive, Vakarian.”

“Twenty minutes out from the target,” Kaidan relayed. “What’s Commander Hindly’s position?”

She reached out towards the panel and, despite her prior threat to be a backseat navigator, she’d never actually compromise a mission to such a degree or show a lack of faith in her marines, so she asked, “May I?”

Instead of taking the opportunity to give her a hard time, Kaidan nodded. “When we last spoke, he was using this spot for scouting. The geth are using a base on top of a plateau.” She moved her finger down on the map. “He’s pulling back to here.”

Kaidan highlighted the location and took over, prompting Garrus with a course change to avoid driving over a mountain. Only one meaningful glance her way, indicating her rather thought she _would_ have.

Damn right.

“Who knows,” Williams’s voice floated up from the back, “maybe we’ll get lucky and a sinkhole will swallow the geth up before we even get there.”

 

-O-

 

Ashley crouched down next to the LT, gun at the ready in case their position was made by the geth. Garrus and Tali hung back at the command post Commander Hindly had established in order to come up with a mission plan more comprehensive than ‘shoot them’.

Which was why Shepard was climbing up a ridge that looked entirely too sheer, but somehow the Commander found purchase. Alenko had helped her into the climbing gear while she assured him no fewer than five times that she could make it up just fine. Ashley didn’t think the questions were because the LT was worried about her. Well, not _just_ because he was worried about her. Even Hindly had been dubious the Commander could make the climb. Coupled with silica blowing around and the high winds buffeting the cliff… yet there she was, proving them all wrong.

The LT’s eyes were glued to her position and Ashley noted he was coiled tight, as if ready to catch her in a biotic lift the moment she slipped. That explained the static electricity she felt on her arms, then.

“You worry too much, LT. It’ll give you gray hairs.”

Alenko only grunted in response and Ashley practically felt one of his hairs turn gray in the process. She deactivated her helmet comm and tapped Alenko on the shoulder. He shifted a fraction of an inch her way, indicating he was listening. Ashley hesitated for a bit, not entirely sure how to phrase what she wanted to say. When she didn’t say anything, Alenko asked, “Yes?”

“Shepard will be fine.”

Alenko spared her a glance that spoke volumes, but didn’t say anything in return.

“Besides,” Ashley continued, “if she falls, you’ll catch her.”

Shepard disappeared over the ridge, and Alenko finally relaxed. Marginally. Just enough to open his ‘tool which he’d paired with Shepard’s so he could relay updated maps to Commander Hindly.

“ _You read me?”_

“We got you, Commander,” Ashley replied, thumbing her comm back on. “The LT’s got his omni-tool out and ready to go.”

“ _Five snipers in towers; three automated defense turrets with 360 degrees of rotation guarding the road up to the plateau; at least fifteen grounders, two of which are carrying rocket launchers; one of those hopping flat ones has plastered itself just above the base entrance. No drones that I can see.”_

Ashley closed her eyes to picture the scene, keeping her back against the LT.

“ _No other visible approach to the base, just the road. Commander Hindly was right on that front - we’re gonna have to storm the base.”_

“We’ll need a breather first,” Alenko voiced.

Ashley nodded, knowing the LT would feel it. Even with the breaks given by driving from base to base, it’d been a long day. Several hours pounding dirt and scouting while wearing armor, and she was beginning to feel it. Commander Hindly’s squad undoubtedly felt the same.

“ _Agreed. There’s an outdoor garage next to the base. It looks like they’re assembling the shell to an armature. I can’t tell how far along the process is.”_

Alenko and Ashley both swore.

“ _Assume far enough.”_ The Commander was quiet for a moment. _“The road up is clear, but they’ll still hear us coming before we even get half way.”_

Ashley felt Alenko glance up when the back of his helmet touched hers. “How long are you staying up there, ma’am?”

“ _Coming down in ten minutes. Why?”_

“Wind speeds are picking up.”

“ _Let’s make it five, then.”_

 

-O-

 

Kaidan hovered over the map displayed on the fold out table from Commander Hindly’s shuttle, Olivia just off his shoulder in deep discussion with Hindly over the time table. He squinted at the approach, their _only_ viable approach. At least for the vehicles.

While he had to admit that Shepard’s plan had a significant amount of gumption to it, he couldn’t help but marvel at how fucking crazy it was, either. And how crazy N training must be if she didn’t even bat an eye at the suggestions she put on the table. That probably made her a good N, if he was honest. There was a reason why certain people were recruited for Special Forces, and a willingness to suggest and carry out inhuman tasks was one of them.

Olivia certainly had that in no small degree.

Her plan was two-fold. The Mako would approach, manned by Williams, Garrus, and Tali. They would follow the shuttle up and the shuttle would breach the defense turret perimeter first, as it had better maneuverability. While the shuttle drew fire, the Mako would clear the ridge and cover the shuttle. Together, they made the Frontal Assault Team.

That wasn’t the crazy part.

Olivia and Kaidan, dubbed the Infiltration Team, would start ahead of the others and scale the opposite side of the plateau. The Mako would drop them off and then meet at the base of the road leading up with the shuttle. Once the IT was three quarters of the way up the ridge, the FAT would begin their approach. IT would break the edge just ahead of the FAT, giving them time enough to slip out of their climbing gear. Once the FAT made their entrance, IT would make a run for the bunker and breach it.

FAT was responsible for clearing the external geth presence. Once that was done, Commander Hindly and one of his marines would enter the bunker and rendez-vous with the IT. The rest would maintain watch outside.

Kaidan planned on downing no fewer than three power bars in preparation for the op. After his power nap.

Olivia pushed off the table. “We begin in four hours, then.”

Kaidan looked up at her, then Hindly. Hindly nodded. “I’ll get my squad rotation into two hour bunk and guard alternating shifts. Then we’ll get started.”

“See you in four, Commander.”

“Commander.”

Hindly walked towards his squad and Olivia turned to face Kaidan. “First or second bunk shift?”

Kaidan looked back down at the map and gave himself an assessment. He was tired. His energy stores were draining him and if he kept going, a migraine was liable to rear its ugly head. “First.”

“Okay, head to the Mako. Move the gunny seat to the side while I check on the others.”

He did, eagerly looking towards getting a few winks before beginning the approach. Even lying down would be enough if he couldn’t actually get sleep. Just something to get some rest.

He’d just finished moving the gunny seat on the rail to the back, tucking up the seat to eek out more space for at least one other person when Olivia slipped into the Mako and shut the door. “Garrus and Tali begged off, citing alien biology. ‘We don’t need as much sleep as humans.’”

“And Williams?” he asked, while watching the pressurization cycle while Shepard retrieved two sleeping bags from the rear locker.

“Asked for the first watch rotation.” Olivia sat back on her heels when the cycle beeped and removed her helmet. Kaidan did the same. “Don’t tell her I said so, but I’m more than a little grateful. That climb took a lot out of me.”

He spread out his bag, careful to not knock into her as she did the same next to him. The space was more than a little tight with the both of them in there, and their bags overlapped. Even with moving the seat to the side. Kaidan started removing the bulkier bits of his armor, anything he could put back on in two minutes if necessary, leaving the rest attached. Awkward sleeping, sure, but necessary for the mission. They had to be ready for anything.

He was surprised when Olivia tilted her head forward and undid the little buns and shook out the braids. More so when a soft, little noise of pleasure escaped her throat as she ran her fingers through the strands. Kaidan cleared his throat and tore his eyes away. The urge to run his fingers through her hair was nearly overpowering. Good lord, he needed something to do to distract himself. So he focused on setting their armored parts at their feet so they could lie down as if her were handling a bomb, pointedly not looking when Olivia flipped her hair over her shoulder, and _definitely_ not biting down on his bottom lip hard to keep himself committed to the task at hand.

He laid down on his bag and rotated onto his side to give her enough space to do the same, which she did only after redoing her hair in a braid that hung loosely down her back.

Then they were facing each other, mere inches separating them. He swore he could almost feel her warmth through the layers of their armor even though intellectually, he knew that was impossible. They were so close that when he adjusted his position, his knees tapped hers. She tucked her hands up by her head, rumpling the bag up enough to form a makeshift pillow. Both of them laying on top of the sleeping bags rather than in. They didn’t need the warmth while in their envirosuits, and getting inside the bags would only serve to tangle them up if they needed to get up immediately.

“What’s the ‘M’ stand for?” Olivia asked.

Kaidan looked at her and found she had closed her eyes. “What?”

“Kaidan M. Alenko.”

“Oh,” he chewed on his lower lip before answering, more than a little surprised that she had not only asked, but how soft her voice was as she asked. “Marcos.”

“Mmm.”

He continued to look at her, rather thinking she’d taken on an adorably sleepy quality. Her features smoothed out, the little wrinkle between her brows gone. Making the scars on her face more visible, but they didn’t detract from her appearance. Not for him, anyway. They were each of them memories of things she’d survived and conquered.

He closed his eyes. “What does ‘J’ stand for?”

“Juliette.”

He was silent for a bit, listening to the sound of her breathing which had started to slow. A nice rhythm lulling him into a sense of security he hadn’t felt in a long time. “I like that.”

After a few more minutes where sleep threatened to wash over him, he opened his eyes again to look at her. “Your hair is long.”

She smiled, one eye lazily opening just enough to see him. “Yours isn’t.”

He closed his eyes and shifted position. More limbs bumping against hers, except this time when he stilled, they were still touching. “I like that, too.”

Olivia scooted closer, or maybe she only intended to shift her position, but the effect was the same regardless. Her hand fell on top of his and Kaidan opened his eyes. She was looking at him. Still sleepy, still adorable, but her eyes were clear and earnest. “Your hair sticks up.”

He bit his lip again, and Olivia’s gaze slipped down then back up. “My implant. Static electricity and curly hair…”

She smiled again. “I like that.”

He adjusted his hand so their palms were touching and curled his fingers loosely around hers. His heart pounding in his chest, but she didn’t pull away. Instead, her fingers tentatively coiled around his. Both of them staring at their hands, not quite avoiding each others gaze, but not seeking it out, either. Not wanting to ruin the spell that had fallen over the cabin. Kaidan briefly wondered if he was dreaming after all. If he had fallen asleep and the mere presence of her so close to him had overtaken his imagination. Filling in the blanks of what he wanted to do, which was to hold her. To be near her. To tuck his fingers into her hair and kiss her.

He hadn’t realized he’d closed his eyes again until Olivia whispered his name. “Kaidan?”

“Yes?” He blinked at her, and found her eyes still closed, though she’d scooted ever so slightly closer; close enough that he could feel her breath on his fingers.

Her grip tightened around his, fingers pressing into his skin and his whole body burned with an unfamiliar warmth he knew was because of her. “I’m glad I met you.”

Kaidan smiled, sliding closer until his forehead pressed against hers. Their arms squished between them, but he didn’t care. “Me too.”


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience in waiting for this chapter. I had to say goodbye to my darling cat Pixel two weeks ago, as well as my grandmother-in-law - it's been a rough few weeks.

Olivia swung her leg over the edge, finally breaking the top of the plateau, then rolled over. She had her scope out and up to her eye fast, scanning the geth perimeter just ahead of them. At least the plateau wasn’t _entirely_ flat, providing ample cover room for her and Kaidan. They’d come up behind a small set of boulders and rocks breaking the relatively flat surface. A few of which looked small enough to tumble over the edge if the wind pushed them just right. Silica and sand blew in between the crevices.

She was beginning to really hate sand.

The geth didn’t notice her arrival, so she crawled back to the edge and peered down at Kaidan hanging five meters below, and signaled the all clear. Olivia maintained her hold on the climbing line until he was over the edge, only disconnecting them from each other when they were well clear of the cliff. They dropped the climbing gear next to a large rock for post-op retrieval.

Kaidan raised his ‘tool and she leaned out to get a view of the situation with her scope.

“Just as we suspected,” he murmured. “All frequencies are jammed.”

Olivia grunted in response.

The geth hadn’t moved much. She couldn’t even tell if they’d switched out shifts since she’d scouted them earlier - or if they needed to. All mechanical components… the radiation might not pose as serious a risk as it did to them. Her HUD indicator showed she still had two hours before the exposure would break through the shielding and compromise her suit. They’d made good time up the cliff. The secondary number once she’d linked her HUD with Kaidan’s showed he had about the same amount of time she did.

“Any sign of the FAT?” Kaidan asked.

“None yet. Geth aren’t spooked, either.”

He shifted around next to her then slid down the other side of the rock.

She kept her eye glued to her scope and monitored the situation in front of her, but allowed her mind to drift. Every time she looked at Kaidan, she found herself feeling warm and soft. As if her heart were an ember at the mercy of a forge, and that forge was Kaidan’s gaze. Her skin tingled and she couldn’t entirely resist the urge to smile stupidly. She’d woken up from their two hour rotation of shut eye tucked into his chest, his head resting on top of hers. His breath tingling against the top of her head in an intimate fashion and she hadn’t actually expected to wake up in his arms, despite having reached out to him, to hold his hand. If he was open to it, which he had been. Her heart had pounded so hard in her chest for those few moments until he rotated his hand until their palms were touching.

Olivia squeezed her hand shut now, the memory of his skin touching hers sending shivers up her spine. As if she could feel the ghost of the warmth of his hand against hers. As if her brain wouldn’t let go of the feeling, because it was uncharted yet very welcome territory.

She chewed on the bottom of her lip. That was enough of that. More time to think about the developing… whatever this was between her and Kaidan later. When there wasn’t a mission on the line and when distracted thinking wouldn’t get either of them killed. The _best_ way she could care for him was to do her job.

Olivia dropped her scope. The geth positions weren’t changing, which meant the FAT was still a ways out. Definitely not in visual range, though with the way the winds were whipping on top of the plateau, she wouldn’t be surprised if the geth didn’t hear the vehicles until they were practically on top of the geth. She slipped back behind cover and examined her handgun. Tungsten rounds to better pierce their shells, especially the armature, and a scram rail to give the shots extra power. The heat sink wasn’t top notch, but she’d installed it nonetheless, just to get the extra wiggle room before overheating.

At least Maji was fucking cold - that would help with the cool off times. Probably not enough to save her life if it came down to it, so she wouldn’t rely on that.

Gelle Klara was too big and wieldly to use on the fly, yet she’d brought the rifle nonetheless. In case the plan went to shit and they _couldn_ _’t_ make the dash. In case she needed to take out one of the defense turrets monitoring the road. Even though they were pointed away from her and Kaidan, that wouldn’t stop them from firing on their position if the turrets became aware of their presence. And then the target selection priority progress would be down to geth programming, something which she rather thought she didn’t want to know just how good it was yet.

Kaidan slid in next to her. “I peered over the ledge and managed to get a visual of the FAT: three quarters of the way up. Can barely hear them from here, we just might take the geth by surprise on this.”

Olivia holstered her weapon and crouched down, Kaidan following suit. “No activity from the geth that I saw, either. Wind speeds are strong and loud.”

Kaidan gazed off into the distance. “At least the wind is with us on the run.”

“Let’s hope _that_ doesn’t change. I’d rather not go flying off the cliff.”

He grunted, an acknowledgment of the grim statement that didn’t give any indication of anything else. But his hand brushed against hers for a fraction of second. His pinky gripping hers reassuringly. “I won’t let that happen, ma’am.”

She looked at him and grinned. “You good with micro applications?”

Kaidan chuckled. “You’re not _that_ small.”

“Maybe I’ll fly into the base instead, beat you to it.”

“That would be something to see.”

“I should requisition some rocket boosters for extra power.”

“As your Head of Marine Detail, I strongly advise against it.”

“Your concerns are noted.”

Kaidan was silent for a moment. The only sound the wind buffeting up against the rock face they were using for cover. “Your tone of voice isn’t exactly promising.”

Olivia grinned again. “Noting concerns isn’t the same as following them.”

“A statement I find to be particularly true with you.”

“Hey, if adventurousness isn’t your thing…” she shrugged, though she punctuated her remark with a smile so he wouldn’t take it the wrong way. Whatever ‘the wrong way’ was.

Instead, Kaidan turned his head to fully look at her, a daring glint in his eyes. “I never said that.”

Olivia cleared her throat, keenly aware of the HUD flashing a dramatic up-shift in her heartbeat. _Of course_ it had, when Kaidan looked at her like that and spoke to her, his voice low and husky. She looked away, her cheeks heating. “Well,” she said after a moment, “I’m gonna requisition some rocket boosters.”

Kaidan sighed in resignation. “Better make it two. Someone has to watch your ass.”

“I admire your gumption.”

“Weary resignation,” he corrected her. Though she could tell from the tone of his voice that he was teasing her. She had no doubt that if she actually purchased rocket boosters Kaidan would follow her. That was just the kind of marine he was. Oh, he’d make sure to inform her it was crazy and maybe even gratuitous, but he’d still do it.

Olivia leaned out of cover and checked the situation again with her scope with a frown, geared for action. She thought she’d heard the telltale sound of the Mako’s engines, but it was hard to tell over the wind. And she’d ordered radio silence between the FAT and IT, so as to not break her and Kaidan’s cover. They had to rely on visual cues only.

“I’m not actually gonna order rocket boosters.”

She felt more than saw Kaidan’s presence just off her shoulder, using his binoculars to get a better view of the situation ahead of them. “I’ll sleep easy tonight, then.”

“I thought I heard the Mako’s engines,” she said by way of explanation.

“They should be getting close now,” Kaidan murmured. “Unless they encountered resistance on the road.”

“The road twisted around the whole plateau, it’s conceivable the geth had more defenses that- they’re moving.”

The platforms guarding the base had all snapped their heads towards the road at once, raising their guns. The furthest ones formed up in a point and spread out between the turrets, while the rocket launchers moved towards the center of the spread out triangle. Far enough apart that it would take more than one hit from the Mako’s main canon to take them all out.

“Get ready,” she ordered, and she felt Kaidan do just that next to her. Radiating battlefield flirtation one moment and combat readiness the next. That made him more attractive to her than ever, that he knew when the lines could be crossed and when they shouldn’t. Oh she could fall for him hard if she let herself.

Kaidan unholstered his gun at her order and she did the same. They only had to wait two more minutes for the shuttle to make its appearance, followed twenty seconds later by the Mako. The shuttle breaking to the left while the Mako dodged right. Olivia kept her eyes on the outdoor garage where she’d seen the armature being built, but nothing came out of it. No balls of high-energy projectiles, no armature, no rapid gunfire. They just might be able to count themselves lucky on that front.

She waited until all three turrets were down before she signaled the run.

Then they sprinted for their lives, making it halfway across the distance before the first platform noticed them. Kaidan knocked it off its feet before it had done so much as look at them, and a half second later, the guns from the shuttle took it off the map completely. Her shields took a few hits and her HUD flashed a depletion warning. She raised her sidearm and fired off a few rounds, not really hoping to score a direct hit so much as providing some return fire that would hopefully knock the resistance down a bit.

It did. Olivia slammed into the wall a few seconds later, then hit the ground as a geth hopper leapt into view almost directly in front of her. With her no longer presenting an easy target, the thing swiveled in the dirt and focused its attention on Kaidan, scoring a few hits against the Lieutenant’s shields before he erected a barrier, still running. She blew it out of the air with Gelle Klara mid jump, swiveling the gun off her mag strip in a smooth motion, tracking the hopper with her eye as it bounced around, forcing Kaidan to roll off to the side and abandon his run, and propped herself up on on her knee in the span of two seconds. The hopper hit the ground on the third second, and ten seconds after that Kaidan hit the wall next to her.

“Thanks,” he said.

She clapped him on the shoulder. “Let’s hack ourselves into a geth bunker before the rest come looking.” His omni-tool was active before she even finished the sentence. “I’ve got your six.”

Kaidan knelt at the door once they reached it and Olivia pressed herself up against his back. Gelle Klara ready and her pistol at her feet. Eyes scanning the area around them, watching either side for the slightest bit of motion. Before he started the hack, Kaidan erected a barrier around the both of them.

 

-O-

 

Kaidan slid along the wall opposite Olivia. Unlike the frenetic energy outside, the geth bunker was eerily quiet. He briefly wondered if they were housing _servers_ of geth in the bunker and deploying the platforms topside. Maybe manufacturing them. If not here, it was possible one of the other systems was the manufacturing center. Though if he had to put his money on any one guess, he’d suspect this was akin to a listening post. With the lack of a dropship in orbit and zero resistance in space, coupled with the relatively small bunker occupation and only one of the big guys, not even entirely constructed, all the signs pointed towards this being the geth version of a listening post. Or the system equivalent of a guard tower.

He pulled up short of a wide set of doors and motioned to Olivia that he’d open the door if she covered it. She nodded the affirmative and raised her pistol. On the count of three, he kicked the door in and she swept in low and fast, sweeping the room before saying, “Clear.”

He followed her in, keeping his gun down but ready just in case. Just because there hadn’t been resistance yet didn’t mean there wouldn’t be.

“Cover me,” Olivia ordered, and he advanced up to her position across the room where she’d found a terminal. He glanced at it before turning his back against hers. Dialing his helmet audio settings up enough that he could hear her breathing through his external suit mic.

“Awfully quiet,” he muttered.

“I feel like we’re being watched from every angle,” Olivia agreed.

Unfortunately for him, the relative quiet of the base gave him ample time to revisit recent… happenings. Such as holding hands with his commanding officer. Not even _just_ holding hands, either. No the most damning thing was waking up with her in his arms, head tucked neatly below his. Right in the crook of his neck. He’d instantly cursed the envirosuit from blocking the sensation of her breath against his skin, and then cursed Williams’s second pounding of the door to ensure they’d woken up, because the second knock had signified Olivia’s departure.

Kaidan had wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep with her in his arms. They’d still been holding hands, too. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel the warmth of her fingers closed around his. For a few sleepy seconds, nothing had existed but them. That memory was gonna haunt him in his sleeper pod that night. Though did it count as a haunting of the intrusion was welcome?

He wasn’t even sure where they stood after that, if anything had really changed at all, or if she _wanted_ anything to change. Kaidan was beginning to suspect that for himself… he was rather leaning towards yes. Yes, go for it. Carefully and intelligently, but yes. And that was a dangerous line of thinking, but he found himself caring about the regs less and less as time went on.

“Their encryption is damn good,” Olivia said, breaking him out of his spell, “but I managed to get access to a few logs. This is a surveillance shop.”

“Unsurprising. Anything indicating numbers?” he inquired; and then, after a moment, “Physical and not?”

“Not that I can see…” Olivia trailed off, then, “Weren’t you working on a program?”

“It’s not finished,” he began, turning around to look at her and the terminal, “I’m surprised you know about it, I haven’t even shared it with Tali.”

Olivia waved her hand in the air. “I saw you coding on your ‘tool the other night. It looked intriguing, but I didn’t wanna intrude.”

“Didn’t keep you from prying,” he quipped, injecting his voice with a bit of joviality to take the sting out of the words. “It’s not decrypting so much as data recovery.”

She poked him in the side. “Why do you think I’m asking? The geth must have installed the same software they use on their platform memory cores, a lot of the data’s been wiped.”

Olivia stepped aside to give him access and Kaidan raised his omni-tool and loaded the program. He hadn’t given it a test run yet, except on hypotheticals. Checking to make sure the code would actually compile instead of failing at launch. Beyond that… he half expected it to fail; at the very least, it would highlight areas that still needed work. So imagine his surprise when after loading and executing the program, it worked. Only partially, and it didn’t restore nearly a quarter of the data - but with the geth, any data recovery at all was amazing.

“I’ll be damned,” Olivia murmured.

“Yeah.”

Kaidan copied the recovered data to his ‘tool, allowing Olivia access when she waved hers above his to grab a copy for herself, too. For a later in depth analysis. Presently, he skimmed the information to see if anything was poignant for their specific circumstances. The data was very… technical. Coded in bursts of intelligence; instead of planetary names, they used planetary positions. Everything about it was scientific and dry, as if he was reading a spreadsheet instead of a report. There were more than a few mentions of reaching consensus on items. That intrigued him, and Kaidan filed both the ‘consensus’ and the items on which consensus was not achieved away for later study. Perhaps a conversation to be had with Tali over a cup of coffee.

“Aha!” Olivia shook her arm in victory. “Geth numbers! There are servers in this base the geth use to store themselves when they’re not in platforms. A temporary storage facility maybe? Easy enough to destroy so long as we don’t encounter heavy resistance. I also found a breakdown of platforms…” she muttered under her breath, counting the various subgroups and Kaidan raised his eyebrows as he followed along at some of the names the geth used to distinguish types. “Nine unaccounted for. Which means they’re somewhere inside.”

“Good thing Commander Hindly will be joining us, hopefully soon.” He noted in particular that three of the unaccounted for ones were ‘shock troopers’. If they were the ones he was thinking of, he didn’t find that promising. “I don’t see mention of the armature.”

“Must not have been finished after all.”

“Which means there might be more half-finished platforms.”

Kaidan wondered if the geth would employ them anyway. A half-finished body was better than no body, and the file provided no indication on how far along the unfinished ones were. They could be missing a few plates for all they knew, but otherwise perfectly usable. Kaidan also found it curious they’d made it this far into the bunker without encountering any of them, and that curiosity prickled the back of his neck. The implications of the lack of resistance thus far weren’t exactly comforting, nor encouraging for what they could be walking into. An ambush.

“They must be guarding the servers and the listening post data,” Olivia stated, voicing his thoughts aloud. She turned back to the terminal and started flipping through menus. “I’m gonna try to find a map of the facility.”

Kaidan took a turn around the room, checking the exists as he passed them. It was still eerily quiet and he saw nothing to indicate that there was a presence anywhere in this base. He _did_ stumble across a plaque on the wall, and glanced back towards Olivia flipping through screens on the terminal. “We don’t need to find a map.”

She looked up at him across the room and he pointed at the sign. “Map of the facility,” he explained.

She clicked off the terminal and joined him in examining the plaque. The facility was small, they were already halfway through it. He didn’t much like the idea of all the remaining geth being concentrated in one area, especially since they’d have to access the room through a bottleneck. Perfect choke point for the geth, probably why they’d done it. Aside from self-preservation, of course. It made sound tactical sense to force the enemy through a single opening. There were two rooms designated with generator icons and databanks. Just looking at the map, though, it wasn’t obvious which was which. Whether they were both listening post databanks with one serving as backup, or if the geth were using one to store more of their numbers than could fit in a platform.

They would have to make a choice of which one to hit first, or split up when Commander Hindly joined them.

“This is a sidearm and sabotage mission,” Olivia murmured into the silence.

Kaidan quietly agreed with her assessment, though she was probably referencing the use of her rifle more than anything else. Close quarters combat was not conducive to sniping.

While they waited for Commander Hindly to join them, they mapped the route to the server rooms, debating which was more likely to be used for what while formulating a plan of attack against the map on the wall. However rudimentary it was.

 

-O-

 

Olivia peered around the corner, narrowly missing a shot directly to her face as she did so. The discharge depleted the barrier Kaidan had placed around her not moments before. She’d long since lost track of the number of beers she hypothetically owed him for saving her ass in one form or another.

“Five left!” she shouted over the din of gunfire - and the occasional whump of metal parts hitting a wall.

Hindly’s team had encountered heavy resistance in what they’d dubbed server room B. There were more geth in the one room than the numbers had indicated, which made her exceedingly glad she and Kaidan had planned for that situation. It was clear the geth were using this as a construction base in addition to a listening post, and once the base had come under attack, the geth had used any platform remotely capable of action. So while their numbers were significantly greater, Olivia rather bet the odds were in their favor. Half-finished platforms meant significant vulnerabilities that they could exploit.

The sabotage mine dropped out of the fab unit on her ‘tool - a refined template based on what she’d learned from previous encounters with the geth. She still hadn’t managed to puncture through the shielding they used around their memory cores, but she was close - she could feel it. A few more skirmishes and then…

Olivia timed her throw with Kaidan ducking back down behind cover just opposite her. He’d wrenched part of the wall plating free with a biotic punch, using mass effect fields to _build_ himself cover and she was having all kinds of thoughts about new tactical strategies and biotics in her units. His makeshift cover had turned the tide of the fight in their favor, as they had two focal points to work with instead of one. The geth couldn’t rely on simply spraying bullets at one target.

Her mine exploded, overheating the geth weapons. At least she knew _that_ shielding frequency. Until the geth changed it, that was.

She and Kaidan both leaned out as soon as the detonation hit and took out the remaining geth in their room. With half of them occupying half-finished platforms lacking proper plating and shield modulators, they made short work of them before the geth could switch out their weapons. The sound of gunfire still echoed from the down the hall where Hindly and the Corporal he’d brought with him were still engaging the geth. Her HUD flashed with a partial combat radar restore and she glanced over to see Kaidan fast at work on his ‘tool. Squatting behind his biotically created cover, barrier still washing over his body.

“I’m gonna check the room.”

He grunted in response and she tapped his shoulder as she passed him. Slithering carefully along the wall with her sidearm raised in one hand and her ‘tool open in the other. Scanning the geth as she passed them for electrical signals.

She returned to Kaidan’s position. “Clear.”

He eyed the hallway behind them and frowned. “Commander Hindly might be facing heavier resistance than previously thought. Partial restore didn’t provide definitive numbers, but there were a lot of red dots.”

“Let’s go back him up, then.”

Olivia took point, moving briskly down the hallway as she thumbed her comm channel open. “Commander, Alenko and I cleared server room A, we’re on our way to you.”

“ _Copy that,”_ Hindly grunted. He cut the channel out, but not before his succinct acknowledgment was punctuated with another burst of gunfire.

“You got another mine?” Kaidan asked behind her as she slowed near the corner.

“I could have, why? You got an idea?”

She felt more than heard him shrug as she peered around the corner. The Commander and Corporal Herrera were using the same point of cover further down.

“I got an idea,” she stated when he didn’t clarify his question. Probably just asking to build his own position around.

She set her fab unit developing a grenade rather than a sabotage mine. Kaidan hadn’t been wrong about the numbers, the resistance was much heavier in server room B.

“I’m all ears.”

“How much energy you got left?”

She knew Kaidan couldn’t down an energy bar on this op. Not locked in his suit as he was.

“Enough.” After a beat, he continued. “You want me to make another point of cover?”

“That would be lovely, yes.” She ducked back behind the wall. The geth hadn’t noticed their presence yet, which would work in their favor for the first few seconds. Unfortunately, the geth recovered from shock a hell of a lot faster than organic enemies. “I’ll cover you with Klara.”

Olivia hunkered down and whisked her rifle off her back. The hallway was long enough she’d be most effective punching geth straight out with the rifle than taking potshots from this great a distance with her sidearm.

Even through the layers of her armor, the hairs on her arm prickled as Kaidan enveloped himself in a barrier. The static field spreading from the arm closest to him to the other side of her body as she worked. Like a slow wave washing over her. She found it rather comforting; calming.

“I seem to remember you doing that faster in basic.”

“I had Gunnery Chief Moravec to impress in basic.”

Kaidan snorted. “Don’t need to impress your team?”

“Sure I do,” she answered as she stood up, “but you already know how fast I can put her together. Gotta get more imaginative if I really wanna impress you.”

Kaidan stared at her. “I regret saying anything already.”

She leaned close to him, close enough to realize that his eyes were tinged blue because of his barrier. “I thought you promised your mother you’d never lie.”

Olivia bit her lip. The flirtations came entirely too easily, more easily than they should have.

“Hard to think of what else you could do to further impress me with your skill with a rifle, Commander, but I have no doubt you’ll prove me wrong.”

The way he emphasized her rank sent shivers down her spine. A few weeks ago, or even any other marine, and she’d have suspected the use was a way to politely shut down her battlefield flirtations. But the way he’d moved just a hair closer to her and leaned in, deepening his voice when he said ‘Commander’, left no doubt in her mind that he was giving as good as he got. At some point, they’d gone from quiet flirting that could be construed as a just being friendly to… this.

“Ready when you are, Lieutenant.” He slid around in front of her to prep for the dash. “Get as far down the hall as you can, but keep your ass alive.”

Kaidan nodded and placed his hand on the edge of the wall, locking his sidearm into its holster, then looked at her. “In three.”

He counted down and ran out as soon as he reached one. Before his legs were even fully around the corner, Olivia swiveled down onto one knee and leaned out to provide him the cover he needed. She dropped two geth before they noticed their arrival and a third before the geth started focusing their gunfire on the glowing blue marine running down the hallway right at them. Commander Hindly and Corporal Herrera took turns providing additional cover fire as Kaidan concentrated his energy into his fist and slammed it into the wall plating, dislodging the metal enough for him to wrench it free with what looked like a biotic slap.

“I’m good!” he announced over the combat comm channel.

She ducked back behind the wall to take a breath - and to give her gun a breath, too. The heat sink was red hot, radiating enough heat for her to feel through her gloves. One more shot would have overheated her rifle and taken her out of the fight. At least the long range one.

“Rocket launchers!” Hindly shouted.

She muttered some choice words under her breath. Rocket launchers inside a bunker - that reeked of desperation, even for the geth. Using all the resources they had available to stop the assault. Which meant they were hitting the geth where it hurt and they were hitting hard.

The grenade dropped out of the fab unit on her ‘tool and she smiled and pulled the pin. “Fire in the hole!”

Olivia lobbed it down the hallway, unsurprised when Kaidan gave it an extra biotic push right at the platform wielding the rocket launcher where it exploded. The impact took out the closest units and sent the rest scattering. Either for cover or from the force of the detonation. Hindly used the moment of disarray to charge down the hall into the room shouting for Herrara and Alenko to provide cover for him. Kaidan lifted the geth on the floor into the air in front of the Commander and Hindly mercilessly took them out with targeted bursts from his assault rifle even as he ran.

Olivia downed a few more herself with Klara before running up to Kaidan’s position as soon as Hindly entered the room. She slammed into the wall right behind Kaidan, hunkering down behind him even though geth weren’t currently firing on their position.

“Follow him! I’ve got your back!” she ordered, and Kaidan grunted his acknowledgment, ducking out almost as soon as the grunt was complete.

She maintained her grip on Gelle Klara, keeping Kaidan out of her sights, but in her field of vision as he ran the rest of the length of the hall, waving his hand ahead of him to clear a path.

Her grip was steady on her gun but no geth showed themselves. No live ones, anyway.

As soon as Kaidan was in the room, she ordered Herrera to follow them up. While gunfire echoed from the server room - the echoes louder than the ones from her and Kaidan’s room, suggesting it was much larger - the hallway remained free of resistance. The Corporal made it safely through, staying near the entry until Olivia joined them.

The firefight was not drawn out. The remaining platforms were in disarray, proving Tali’s theory that the geth were smarter the more of them there were in proximity to each other. It made their job easier in the end. Even the rocket drone lurking in the corner didn’t stand that great of chance and met the business end of a biotic punch when it rounded the corner to try and take Kaidan by surprise, followed by Olivia slamming a tech mine directly onto its newly exposed circuit board.

She stood over the drone’s shell after putting a few rounds into it just to be certain. The silence was deafening following the gunfire.

“Room is clear,” Hindly stated.

Kaidan thumped her on the back and she returned the gesture.

“Let’s see what the geth were hiding from us.”

“There’s an active terminal over here, ma’am,” Corporal Herrera said. “Screen looks buggy.”

Olivia frowned as she crossed the room, Kaidan right behind her. “Buggy?”

Hindly swiveled on his feet to look at them as they approached and shrugged. “You two are the point people for tech here.”

Olivia saw what Herrera meant by buggy as soon as she passed Hindly. Text and symbols were flashing all over the screen. Either the geth attempted to wipe it or one of her mines got too close to its hard-drives when it went off. Both outcomes likely. If they were lucky, her sabotage mine halted the data wipe before it had a chance to ruin the intel.

If they were lucky.

“You or me?” Kaidan asked.

“You’re the superior hacker here,” she stepped aside so Kaidan could use his program again, “but if you need me to repair some hardware, let me know.”

“I’ll just open my side pocket if that’s the case,” Kaidan retorted.

“Hey, I packed extra shit this time.”

Kaidan activated the keyboard and opened his ‘tool, loading his magical program. “Only because I handed it to you.”

Before Olivia could reply, Hindly tapped her shoulder. “Do you want to check out the other room, too?”

“Yeah,” she replied. “These don’t look like geth servers. Not enough power.”

“I’d say these are databanks for intel,” Kaidan mused allowed. His face was practically buried in his omni-tool.

“Take Herrera with you then, I’ll keep watch over Alenko.”

“In case more geth pop up,” she agreed. Then she jerked her head at Herrera. “Let’s go, Corporal.”

Ahead of her, Herrera paused at the part of the wall Kaidan had destroyed, then shook their head. Olivia glanced at the Corporal as she passed them, then halted when they didn’t keep following down the hall after her.

“Never seen that before, ma’am,” Herrera offered by way of explanation before trotting back up.

“Neither have I. Kaidan’s better than most biotics I’ve ever worked with.”

“I believe it.” Then after another moment of silence as they rounded the corner down to the other server room. “What about the krogan?”

“Wrex?” Olivia asked, “He’s good, too. Not sure who’s better there. Wrex plays it more hot; Kaidan cool.”

“You call what happened to that wall ‘cool?’” Herrera asked incredulously.

“Sure. Pretty calculated thing to do in the middle of battle when AI’s are firing bullets up your ass.” Olivia looked sideways at the Corporal. “You haven’t worked much with biotics, have you?”

“No, ma’am.” A beat. “Nor war heroes, either.”

“You work with Drew Hindly.”

“He’s a survivor, ma’am, and he’s damned good. But Akuze didn’t make Commander Hindly a war hero.”

Olivia was silent after that. Akuze should have made him a hero, because surviving on your own when the rest of your unit was slaughtered around you was a pretty damn heroic thing to do in her books. Hindly had what it took to be a war hero, and if their positions had been reversed, she was sure he’d have done just as well at the Blitz as she was purported to have done. Not every marine had what it took, and not every marine that did would be presented with an opportunity to show that.

Kaidan had what it took. So did Williams.

Then again, the Normandy crew had been handpicked from the entire Alliance fleet for their service records. There were more junior officers aboard her ship than there were on some cruisers. Everyone was overqualified for the positions they were serving - but they were exactly the type of people she needed to get her mission done. Olivia knew for a fact Pressly had already put in a rank promotion recommendation for Kaidan, and was currently favorably assessing Williams for the academy.

The only thing she knew about her file was that Anderson and Hackett were the ones with active access. She had a feeling she’d top out at Major, maybe General, for a good chunk of her career until she was ready to sit behind a desk and organize from behind the scenes. That wasn’t a future she saw for herself any time soon.

The room came into view. Once they entered it, Olivia ordered, “Sweep left, I’ve got the right.”

The layout of the room was a lot smaller than the other one, but there was way more power coming into it. Cables crossing over the floors, extra holes drilled into walls, additional generators. None of which were running. In fact, all the terminals on her side were dead which she noted with disgust. They weren’t dead from being hit with anything. Olivia felt along the side of the last one with her fingers until she found what she was looking for: a kill switch.

“We’re not gonna find anything here, Corporal.”

She flipped the kill switch just to be sure and was completely unsurprised when nothing happened. The geth had already activated it themselves, probably using a timed trigger release. A quick peek inside the panel revealed nothing but fried drives and burnt cables. Olivia slammed the panel back in place, the bile in her stomach rising to the bottom of her throat. The fact that the geth would rather annihilate themselves than be caught out…

Herrera slid up next to her. “You get them too good with a sabo mine?”

“No.” Olivia turned away from the console, and started back to the other room. There was nothing to be salvaged here. “This wasn’t us.”

Once they’d stepped outside the server room, she heard Herrera mutter, “Shit.”


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't quite finish this one before the holidays, but here it is now! Better late than never, right?
> 
> I'll be a bit off schedule here for at least another week - my new work schedule I've been doing has me going in Thursdays now, so that day won't work anymore. I'm either going to switch to Friday or Saturday. I'll let you all know once I make a decision that works best with my new schedule!

Scout sniping, Ashley decided, was _not_ for her. She had tolerated it on Maji as a new learning experience, getting the grunt work done with Shepard and learning the ropes; grumbled about it on Casbin when Alenko was needed for a separate op; fortunately didn’t have to partake on Antibaar when Alenko had volunteered; then drew the short straw on Rayingri. She blamed the geth as her primary target for occupying what was turning out to be the whole damn nebula, and council politics as her second. If it weren’t for the batarians and their ‘vested interest’ coupled with the Council wanting everyone to make nice with each other, they’d have been able to bring in at least a few more ships to get this shit done. Some of those ships would have undoubtedly had at least one or two snipers.

Though that wouldn’t have changed the situation on Casbin with its status as a Sanctuary World. Only vitally important mission personnel had gone on that one, and they’d taken Commander Hindly’s shuttle instead of doing a Mako drop, that way the Normandy wouldn’t have to later land and put the whole mission in violation of Council law. Spectre or no, Ashley had a feeling the Council would use that as a black mark against humanity’s first Spectre - and if she’d interpreted the Commander’s words right, Shepard felt the same way.

Ashley straightened, letting the binoculars fall to her lap. “I’ve lost feeling in my ribs, Skipper.”

Shepard looked sideways at her, then shrugged. “At least Rayingri is warm with a breathable atmosphere.”

“I knew I should have let Kaidan pick the straw first. Two hours of this and now I can’t feel my elbows.” She rubbed them for emphasis.

Shepard returned to her rifle to watch the geth base and Ashley lifted her binoculars back up. “Hindsight is twenty-twenty.”

This base had been easy to find at least. There were no other outposts to check out, making this one stand out like an eyesore on planetary scans. Because Rayingri was a planetary death trap waiting to happen.

As if to prove her point, the ground shook again. She glared at the moon hanging low in the sky and the threatening clouds on the horizon. Everywhere she looked there was a goddamn storm. Lightning or tornadoes, all coupled with ominous rumbles. She was just waiting for the moment when one dropped on their asses.

Being easy to find, however, meant it would be that much easier for the geth to see them coming. And after wiping out three other operations in three other systems, one of which had included a short space battle, the geth on Rayingri had to know they were coming. Maybe not when, but they’d know they were past the ‘if’ stage.

“I’m sure you’d rather Kaidan were here instead of me,” Ashley said after a few minutes. “He at least doesn’t complain about the tight quarters.”

“If he were here, one of us would be liable to knock the other over the edge.” Shepard tapped the ledge they were occupying. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Chief, but he’s a big guy.”

Ashley smiled. “He’s not that big, ma’am. You’re just small. I think my toes knees are numb, too.”

“If you want to switch out so bad, radio him and beg off. I’ll pretend to not hear any bribes you may offer.”

Ashley was silent for a moment, considering the idea. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to do the mission nor that she wasn’t eager to take out the geth occupation in the Armstrong Nebula. She just wasn’t built for stakeouts. She was a marine who lived on the _go_ , not on a ledge. She never would have made a good sniper, because being a sniper wasn’t all about the shooting and hitting the target dead on. “I just might take you up on that, Skipper. How much longer are you up her for?”

“Until Commander Hindly is done with his shuttle sweep of the perimeter.” Shepard opened her ‘tool and checked the map of the area. Hindly had set a wide net for the sweep, to see if there were other entrances they could take advantage of. “Maybe another hour, unless he gets hit with a cyclone.”

“Weather looks clear. I’m optimistic. You think Kaidan will be amenable?”

“I think you’re gonna have ask him. But,” she dropped away from her scope again, “if you do get him to make the trade, tell him to bring some rations with him.”

Practically permission to guilt Alenko into it in Ashley’s books. She smiled. “Aye aye, ma’am.” She sat up as much as she could without jostling Shepard and activated a comm channel to Alenko. “Cover your ears, Skipper.”

“ _Williams?”_

“My ears are covered, Chief.”

“ _I don’t like where this is going,”_ Alenko said, having overheard Shepard’s reply through Ashley’s comm.

“The Commander’s hungry, LT,” Ashley started. She practically heard Alenko sigh over the white noise. “And my elbows and knees are about to fall off.”

“You forgot about your ribs.”

“Right, my ribs, too.” She prodded Shepard in the shoulder. “Your ears are supposed to be covered. LT, my hands or shoulders might be next.”

Kaidan managed to make the words come out of his mouth like a sigh. _“I’ll be up in ten. I’ll radio when I hit the ladder.”_

Ashley clicked the channel off. “He’s on his way.”

Shepard sat up and arched her back. Looked like even _she_ was beginning to succumb to the effects of long-term scouting. It was good to know Ashley wasn’t the only one, her limbs positively ached from sitting still in cramped quarters for so long. The other planets had at least given them some stretching room, but this perch… Shepard simply had a higher tolerance for tight spaces than Ashley did.

“Did he say what he was bringing to eat?”

“Fine wine and steak.”

Shepard frowned glumly, though she knew Ashley’s quip wasn’t serious. “I don’t eat steak.”

“Don’t tell Kaidan that, Skipper, you’ll break his heart.” Shepard looked sideways at her and Ashley laughed. “That’s right, you weren’t there the other night when he had a hissy fit over the Mess Sergeant’s ‘destruction of a perfectly good steak’.”

“I skipped that meal,” Shepard confirmed.

“Alenko went off about overcooking steak. I guess Laflamme cooked his all the way through and the LT refused to eat it after having hearts in his eyes when he first heard the word ‘steak’. Then he got all touchy about the cut of the meat and Laflamme’s subsequent butchering of it.”

Shepard shook her head. “I’ll be sure not to get between Kaidan and steak.”

“Just never order one above medium-rare, and you’ll probably be fine.”

Instead of offering a reply, Shepard simply made a small, noncommittal noise. Sounded more to Ashley’s ears like Shepard would never order a steak period.

After a few minutes of silence while Ashley eagerly awaited the signal from the LT, she said, “I’m surprised you didn’t hear the fallout from your cabin.”

“I was reading a really stupid book.”

“Kaidan’s steak craze would have been a good distraction. Never seen the LT all fired up like that before. And over _food_. Even Wrex started to get offended on his behalf.”

Shepard huffed a laugh, then, after one more languorous stretch, settled back down into monitoring the geth outpost.

“ _Come on down, Chief.”_

Ashley popped up as fast as she could without knocking Shepard off the edge. “I’m heading down, Skipper. Enjoy the momentary peace and quiet.”

Shepard waved her away and Ashley climbed down the makeshift ladder Shepard had dropped two hours ago after scaling up. Rayingri was covered in short, spiky hills with few flat surfaces in between. The only extended flat surface was occupied by the geth outpost, which meant they had to linger further out in order to properly scout the geth without being discovered. Which meant the spiky hills. She was exceedingly glad when her feet finally hit the ground and sighed in relief.

“Couldn’t let me enjoy my long straw, could you?” Alenko quipped as he accepted the binoculars she held out to him.

“I’m not built for sitting still, LT. If the geth were doing something interesting, it might have been a different story.” Then, because she had an idea, Ashley stopped Alenko before he started up the ladder. He looked at her questioningly. “Shepard doesn’t like steak.”

Alenko narrowed his eyes and Ashley almost, _almost_ , wished she was going back up if only to see what he’d say to the Commander about the one true love of his life.

“Don’t give her too much terror, LT.” Ashley winked at him.

“It would be rude to give her any terror at all today,” Alenko replied, and before Ashley could ask for clarification, he started up the ladder.

The way he’d emphasized today… he knew something and wasn’t sharing. Ashley frowned up at him, watching as he climbed up. Shepard wasn’t in bad a mood, and Alenko had definitely emphasized today in reference to _her_. So it had something to do with Shepard… It wasn’t related to the Blitz, that was in the fall. Nor was it Mindoir, either. That date had passed already, before Ashley had even met Shepard.

“Ah, hell,” she muttered, the light going off in her head. She opened a channel to both Alenko and Shepard. “Happy birthday, Skipper.”

“ _Thanks, Williams,”_ Shepard drawled.

“Now I gotta get you a present, ma’am.”

“ _You really don’t.”_

“Did Kaidan get you something?”

“ _He better not have.”_

“Well, LT?”

The line was silent for a bit before Alenko replied. _“I maybe got her something.”_

“Can’t let the LT show me up, Skipper. I’m getting you something.”

Shepard sighed then cut the channel.

“Remind me to give you hell later for not sharing the news, LT,” Ashley said. Alenko muttered something that didn’t quite carry over the comm, but his tone of voice made it abundantly clear what he meant. Then, with her finger hovering over the disconnect, she said, “Don’t flirt too hard,” and cut the channel.

The base of operations wasn’t far away, only a short hike which gave Ashley plenty of time to reread her latest message from Micah. She’d hoped that he wouldn’t drop her after their one official date and day together, had still expected that he would despite the connection between them, and was exceedingly pleased when she got her first message from him not fifteen minutes after checking back into the Normandy.

They’d written each other frequently since. Coordinating their leave together was difficult when neither knew when they’d next hit Arcturus. Or any point of contact where they could conceivably meet each other, really. So they’d settled for video dates. He played her a few songs on his guitar, she read him a few lines from her favorite poems. Sometimes he played soft guitar in the background while she read recited Ulysses, trying to get her to sing - which she adamantly refused to do. _He_ was the musician, not her.

Ashley was working out a way to tell her sisters about the new man in her life. Especially since they’d latched onto Alenko as the poster-hottie for the Normandy and kept asking her about him. That was awkward, and not just because she thought of the LT more as an older cousin or brother. It was clear to her now that _something_ was going on between the Alenko and Shepard, even if neither of them realized it yet. Only an idiot would look at them and not be able to tell they didn’t at least like each other. Ashley would eat her own boots if they didn’t break the regs to some degree or another during this mission. Especially the longer it lasted.

She’d probably throw Alenko at Shepard if that turned out to be the case. LT was a fool for her already, and Shepard wasn’t much better off. Or was better at hiding it.

The blush in her cheeks when Ashley had called her out on her crush was all the confirmation she’d needed.

The base rounded into view ahead of her, and Ashley shook her head clear.

Rayingri was another planet where they’d taken only Hindly’s shuttle. The planet was too unstable for a Mako drop and the intermittent tornadoes didn’t make it safe to bring the Normandy in for an extraction. Shepard wasn’t willing to risk the ship, despite Joker’s protest that he could outrun any cyclone on his ass. Two Commanders shutting him down had kept him quiet in the end, however.

Wrex was walking the perimeter when she arrived at the base camp. After a moment of contemplation, Ashley decided to join the krogan instead of sitting down. She needed to stretch her legs, not stand around. Two hours on a ledge with Shepard had left her feeling restless.

“Hey Wrex,” Ashley said as she fell in next to him.

The krogan grunted. “Williams.”

After a few minutes of walking the perimeter together, Ashley said, “Shepard likes sitting still too much for my tastes.”

Wrex laughed.

 

-O-

 

Olivia was standing on the ledge when Kaidan climbed over, arms above her head, stretching. She turned when she heard him and dropped her arms back to her sides.

“Reveling in the momentary solitude,” she offered by way of explanation, gesturing to mostly flat surface. Relatively flat and _small_ surface.

It was _really_ small, Kaidan thought, as he sat down and Olivia sat down next to him. He could see in the dirt where she’d been laying earlier with her rifle. Quarters must have been cramped with even Williams up, but with him now… “I’m surprised you agreed to the trade.”

Despite his words, Kaidan was actually looking forward to sitting down as a tightness had started behind his eyes not a few hours prior, threatening an oncoming migraine. Just a current dull ache, and some rest, even active rest watching a geth base, was better than none at all.

Olivia shrugged. “I was hungry.”

“Right.” He dug around his side pocket, shifting around to get to it without knocking either of them off, for the rations he’d packed. “I’ve got… two beef ration packs, a chicken one, and a veggie one.”

He held them out to her and she selected the chicken and veggie ones without a pause. “Hope you don’t mind. The rest are yours.”

“I already ate while I was down walking the perimeter with Wrex,” he replied, “Brought these all for you.”

Olivia looked first away, squinting off into the distance as she slowly opened her rations, before looking back at him. “I can’t eat them.”

When she said nothing else, Kaidan slowly offered, thinking she might be having him on and Williams had set him up for a joke after all, “I heard you didn’t like steak.”

“It’s not that I don’t like steak, I can’t _eat_ steak. No matter how good it smells. Allergy.”

He looked at her, stunned. How had he missed that in her medical profile? “A red meat allergy?”

She shrugged. “A bad one. I thought you knew.”

He felt a stab of guilt at that. He _should_ have known. “I only read the medicine allergy list. Didn’t even think to check for food allergies - not really my area in the field.” Then, after a moment and looking at the rations, he added, “Usually.”

“Didn’t see the part where I carry an epi-pen?”

Kaidan gave her a sheepish smile. “Sorry. I thought it was something you did for the team. Jenkins was allergic to a few different types of standard medicine, and Williams has a skin thing with omni-gel.”

She patted him on the arm and spoke softly. “You give me steak and I’m likely to keel over dead.”

That thought sobered him significantly, a coldness settling deep in his stomach, and Kaidan only just resisted the urge to reach out and touch her. To ensure her safety, however ludicrous the reaction was because protecting her against eating red meat wasn’t exactly something that was necessary. He wanted to do it nonetheless. What he _could_ do was start carrying Olivia-safe rations. And now he felt like a jackass for not knowing about the red meat allergy in advance. For bringing her food she couldn’t eat. Good thing he’d grabbed the chicken and veggie ones, otherwise he’d have been the biggest asshole on Rayingri, and that was including the geth.

“Pleasant birthday conversation,” he said.

She was silent for a moment as she ate before she said, “You didn’t really get me a present, did you?”

“Sure,” he replied, “it’s in my locker.”

She fell silent again until she finished eating. Kaidan wasn’t sure what to say, so he didn’t say anything. He didn’t get the feeling she disliked him getting her a present; rather, that she hadn’t expected it. He’d snuck the purchase in the last few hours they were aboard Arcturus, after raking the question in his mind about whether or not he _should_ get her something. Spending that evening in her apartment, though… remembering that had cinched the deal. And had given him a unique insight into the things she already had, so he could get her something that would actually be meaningful.

“When’s your birthday?”

“May 2nd.”

“Lucky me. You’ll be what… 32?”

He huffed a laugh. “Yeah. Lucky you?”

She smiled. “We’ll still be on the same boat so I can return the favor.”

“Don’t think we’ll be on the same boat much longer after this mission?” he asked. He didn’t either; but of late, he didn’t much care for that thought.

Olivia shrugged. “Your career is bright and shiny. I’d love to keep you, but that would be selfish.”

Kaidan bit his lip and picked up the binoculars to look at the outpost.

Ashley hadn’t given him the run down on scouting, probably leaving that up to Olivia.

That wasn’t why he picked up the binoculars, though. He wasn’t sure what to say to that, partially because he wasn’t entirely sure how invested she was - or even he was - in a potential… them. Admitting a willingness to breaking the regs and actually committing to the task were two separate things. One of which required a conversation to be had about the matter.

The base was quiet so he dropped his binoculars. Whatever the geth were doing, they were doing indoors.

“Today is your…?” he finally asked, breaking the silence.

“I’m 29.”

Kaidan looked at the view ahead of them. “Good place to spend it.”

“Rayingri?” she asked, incredulous.

“Sure, might not be here when you turn 30.”

Kaidan looked up at the dwarf planet hanging low in the sky. It was huge, lighting up the surface with light reflected from the star. It was a dying planet absolutely, but it was beautiful in a way. Two planets in a slow waltz of mutual destruction. Ripping at each other the closer they came. Succumbing to the natural laws of the universe.

He felt Olivia looking at him, a feeling that was confirmed when he turned to meet her eyes. “You really are a romantic,” she teased.

“You got all that out of my one statement.”

“I got all that out of the way you looked up at the damn moon.”

“It’s a dwarf planet,” he corrected her.

“You really wanna correct your CO?”

“As my CO’s second in the field, I feel I not only want to, but that it’s my duty.”

She smiled again and looked away. “Smartass.”

“So,” Kaidan cleared his throat, “what do we have here?”

“The quietest geth outpost I’ve ever had the displeasure of scouting. Hence why I let Williams beg off.” She activated her ‘tool and opened a file. “Rare external activity, probably because of the tornadoes. Already seen two in the distance ripping some of the hills to shreds.” She pointed towards two different storms off in the distance. “Not a good planet to set out turrets. Hell, I don’t expect that base to last long.”

“Think they’re excavating?”

“That would be the smart thing to do. Probably.”

“Easier to fight one natural force rather than two.”

“We could use an excavation tunnel to get in.” Olivia shifted around, propping a knee up in front of her so she could rest her rifle on it and look out her scope. “Make our job easier.”

“How far along is Hindly in the sweep?” Kaidan asked, lifting his binoculars up to examine the horizon and not the outpost. He doubted he’d spot the Commander’s shuttle, because if he could see it, then it was likely the geth could see it. He looked nonetheless.

“Last I checked, he had maybe an hour to go.”

“That’s a long time up here.”

“Yes,” Olivia breathed, “Yes, it is.”

“If you want to stretch your legs, I can man the ledge,” he offered.

He didn’t get an immediate reply and so kept scanning the horizon. Not even a disturbance of dirt that could be attributed to the shuttle. There were enough hot winds on Rayingri that nothing stood out. He had just switched to looking at the base when he felt Olivia move next to him.

“Alright,” she said, “just a quick reprieve. I won’t leave you up here by yourself too long.”

Then she passed him her rifle.

After the offended looks he’d gotten from both Olivia and Ashley over different sniper missteps, Kaidan had done his research. Enough to know her offering him her gun wasn’t something small. “You sure?” he asked.

“I’m relinquishing custody for the next few minutes.” He looked up at her and found her eyes full of mirth at their previous joke about joint custody over the gun. He carefully accepted the rifle. “Besides,” she continued, still holding the barrel, “you _did_ name her.”

“A social misstep I wasn’t aware I was making.”

Olivia finally relinquished her hold on Gelle Klara and stepped behind him, heading towards the ladder. “Good thing I like you. And good thing you’ve got those earnest eyes.”

He twisted just enough to look back at her, astonished. For a whole different reason from the rifle. Had she just… surely not, right?

The squad wide comm channel crackled to life. _“Cyclone just touched down a kilometer out, Commander!”_

“Direction?”

“ _Right on your six, heading straight for us. Wrex and I are already hunkered down - you and the LT need to do the same!”_

“ _I’d get off that damned outcropping to start,”_ Wrex added.

Kaidan was already moving before Williams finished speaking, rising to his knees and passing Gelle Klara back to Olivia who’d stopped her descent as soon as Williams’s voice sounded over the channel. He stood up completely and raised the binoculars up towards the horizon behind them. “Massive storm cloud,” he said, “cyclone doesn’t look too big, but that could change. Wrex is right, we don’t want to be up her. We’re right in its path.”

Olivia started down again as soon as the rifle was on her mag strip. Kaidan shoved the binoculars into a pocket in his greaves and followed her.

They only made it halfway down before the wall of dust hit them as the winds picked up. If he wasn’t on the ladder, Kaidan would have attached the breather plate to his helmet to prevent the small rocks and silt from hitting him in the face. Unfortunately, all he could really do was try to keep his head down. By the time they’d reached the bottom, the lightning had started. Olivia waited for him to hit the ground before picking a direction and running, Kaidan hot on her heels.

They ran between huge boulders and jagged rock edges, the roar of the cyclone growing louder, though he couldn’t see it yet. A few lightning bolts struck too close for comfort and the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end as he ran; he could feel the static electricity in his hair. A sensation he was all too familiar with considering, but not one he enjoyed from external sources.

Olivia ducked between two boulders and he followed her, barely slowing as he rounded the corner.

“We’ll never make it back to the base,” she shouted, “we need to find a good place to shelter!”

Kaidan spotted a small indent inside one of the larger jagged rocky spikes and shouted ahead to Olivia as he swung towards it. It wasn’t big, could barely be called a cave. More like a hole in the hill, or a crevice with a roof. It’s one redeeming quality was that it widened just beyond the mouth enough for both of them to fit, with an overhanging lip that just might protect from the worst of the debris. He squeezed through the opening then twisted so he was facing sideways while squatting down because there wasn’t even enough room for Olivia to stand. Olivia followed him in a second later. She squeezed herself in between his legs and braced her feet against the opposite wall while Kaidan slid his arms around her middle. He had the protection of the edge of the wall, she not so much. Both turned their heads away from the opening.

“Think this is enough?” he asked, raising his voice to be heard above the roaring wind. He couldn’t tell if the cyclone was on them or not, and wasn’t sure he wanted to.

“We’re about to find out, it’s almost on us!”

“How can you tell?”

“Mindoir!”

She was clutching his arm with one hand, bracing herself against the wall with the other.

Bits of small debris still manged to make their way inside their small hideout just as the noise reached its peak and Kaidan closed his eyes, unconsciously pulling Olivia closer to him while raising a small barrier just strong enough to deflect the debris. It didn’t stop the vortex of air pulling at them or prevent them from sliding a few inches before Olivia’s legs braced against the opposite wall stopped them. He thanked every god he could name for finding the small opening, that they both fit inside. That they had holds to brace themselves against.

The roaring winds lasted five minutes. He dropped the barrier as soon as the noise decreased, much to the relief of the building pressure at the base of his skull where his implant felt warm from the extended use, but he didn’t release his hold on Olivia for another three minutes after that. Helmets pressed together against the wall of the cave-hole. Only when he could hear her breathing without assistance from their comms did he loosen his grip.

Olivia finally relaxed herself when he dropped his arms, muscles tired from holding onto her so hard, head warm and tight from actively holding a prolonged barrier. If he was gonna keep up with the extended biotic applications, he’d have to start looking into a new amp with better heat-sinking capabilities. He filed that away as something to concern himself with later. Of course, the extended use and warm amp had very little to do with the presently building migraine. But they had contributed.

In another life where he hadn’t just held onto another human being for dear life, Kaidan might have had the grace to be mildly embarrassed about the placement of his hands low on her waist. Now he could only muster a thankfulness at still being alive. Olivia turned away from the wall but instead of rising, she dropped her head against his chest and blew out a huge breath. “Goddamn.”

Kaidan reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose, grateful now that he hadn’t had time to put on his breather plate. It didn’t relieve all the pressure, but it did alleviate the ache behind his eyes. Good thing he carried a field-grade painkiller. He attempted to raise his leg to get access to the pocket, but the quarters were too cramped. “Can you get my med-kit?”

Olivia moved immediately, hands searching the pockets on his leg until she found what he asked for, then she twisted, more than he could given the small space, until she was sitting on his lap facing him. Kaidan pressed his legs together so she could straddle him and sit more comfortably. He accepted the kit and removed his helmet, which Olivia took out of his hands without question.

Kaidan closed his eyes after knocking back the painkiller gel. Designed specifically for fast release, to be used in the field only. Super high-end pain med. He rested his head against the wall behind him while he waited for it to kick in.

What he did not expect was for small fingers to press into his temples, relieving the building pressure. He couldn’t entirely help the groan that escaped his lips as the pulsating receded into the background. Fingers moving behind his ears and as far down the sides of his neck as far as his armor would allow, applying the perfect amount of pressure to relieve the tension. After a few minutes, once the medicine started kicking in, he covered her hands with his own, stilling the massage even though he could sit there for hours under the ministrations of her fingers. Wanted to, in fact.

But they still had a mission to do.

“Thank you,” he murmured.

He felt her nod, though he hadn’t yet opened his eyes. “Of course.”

Her voice was just as quiet as his.

“I just need a moment, and then I’ll be good to go,” Kaidan assured her.

Knowing his CO was cognizant of the effects of his implant and didn’t think less of him for it was a completely different thing (in his mind) to those effects affecting him in the field. He was more than a little embarrassed, even though he knew he shouldn’t be. The implants weren’t his fault, after all - and he could have had it a lot worse. It didn’t make the matter any less galling to know that the alternative could have been him living out his life as a vegetable. He’d long since made his peace with letting himself feel intermittently angry concerning the migraines without feeling guilty that other people who’d received the L2 implants had suffered much worse, if not death.

He felt her nod again. After a few more seconds of silence, she pulled away and her hands slipped out from beneath his, before saying, “We’re fine, Williams. No broken bones or missing body parts.” A pause. “Found a crevice in a wall to wait out the storm.” Another pause, though this time Kaidan opened his eyes to see Olivia had twisted away just enough that he couldn’t see her face. Ostensibly to give him as much peace as possible. “We’re gonna take a breather before we dig ourselves out. Holding onto nothing for dear life against howling winds is exhausting. Kaidan and I will meet you back at the camp.”

Olivia’s hand fell away from her helmet after clicking off her comms, but she didn’t turn her face back to look at him. Appearing for all intents and purposes to be studiously examining the wall. He wished he could read her better so he could understand her motivations. Things were… interesting between them of late, and he wasn’t entirely sure what to think of the situation all the time. If it was light but relatively meaningless flirtation or something more than that. There were moments where Kaidan felt sure something electric existed between them, but then, well, they hadn’t talked about anything. No dropped hints about what they might want from each other. Just… a hot mess of feelings; and for all he knew, that hot mess could be one sided.

Kaidan shook his head - and instantly regretted it. He muttered a curse under his breath, which caught Olivia’s attention and she finally turned back to face him.

“How are you?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Not great, but I’ll live.”

She smiled and Kaidan could have sworn he felt some of the tension bleed out his head.

And then he realized his hands were on her thighs. High on her thighs and awfully… close to uh, places. Kaidan very carefully slid them away; but short of holding them suspended in the air, there was nowhere for them to go but towards the outside of her legs. At least that was more modest. Armor or no.

That probably explained the studious looking away.

“Tip top shape, I bet.”

“Perhaps you have too much faith in me, Commander.”

“I highly doubt that,” she replied, echoing his earlier sentiments. She accompanied the statement with another smile and Kaidan couldn’t resist smiling back.

Olivia broke eye contact after a few moments and peered around their tiny cave. “It’s kind of dark in here.”

Now that he thought about it, it _was_ darker than it had been when they entered. He’d have expected it to be brighter following the tornado, not darker. And with the oncoming migraine, the darkness had been a welcome relief he hadn’t thought to question till she pointed it out.

The migraine was gonna hit him in full that night. That much he knew for sure. The medicine would only delay the effects and he’d pay the price later.

Kaidan leaned forward so he could peer through the crack in the wall they’d used to enter, only peripherally aware of how intimate their position was. Her straddling him, facing each other, him invading her space and pushing her backwards. If she hadn’t been wearing her helmet…

Kaidan shut that line of thinking down. They were on a mission. Regardless of whatever there was or wasn’t between them, kissing on the field wasn’t an option. _Especially_ a first kiss. Not exactly a romantic setting. Well, he conceded, not an ideal romantic setting. He couldn’t say it wasn’t entirely unromantic after having told Olivia it was a good place to spend her birthday. And the birthday factor certainly added to the charm.

“I think we’re partially buried in.”

She placed her hand on his shoulder to partially leverage herself into the opening, her legs squeezing around his thighs, knees tight on his hips. Kaidan braced her with his own hands, moving them to her waist as she leaned further back than she would otherwise have been capable of without the additional support.

“Well,” she grunted after checking it out, settling back down, “this will be fun.”

“I could push it out,” he offered.

“I don’t think we’ll need that kind of power,” she said, “it’s just the tightness of the entrance that’s the biggest problem. It all forms a neat wall where your barrier was. Besides,” she wiggled on his lap, whether from discomfort or to get ready for her next move, he couldn’t say, “I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

Kaidan couldn’t help the hot flash of irritation that shot through him. He knew it was unfair, but he was _so used_ to being questioned, and he couldn’t help feeling particularly burned by those words coming from Olivia. He hadn’t even _seen_ the situation so for all he knew, it could be a relatively simple ‘push and be done with it’ job. And he _did_ have a headache. But it still _burned_ him, more than he felt it should, and he was pretty sure that was because of his feelings towards her.

Olivia stilled as soon as the words were out of her mouth, and then she leaned back again, looking through the crevice, before she removed her helmet and set it down behind her next to his.

Then she placed a hand on his arms, arms he’d crossed over his chest without realizing it. “Kaidan, I said that to protect you. And maybe I’m overstepping my bounds and it’s not my place to make those calls, even if I’m only making them with your best interests at heart, but I only said that because we are more than capable of taking care of the rubble without you exerting yourself for us more than you already have. I want to look out for you and be smart about it, and I don’t want to push you just because I know you can and will if I ask. I _know_ you can do it and wouldn’t hesitate if I asked, but you’re looking at me with hooded eyes and you just had to take a painkiller for an oncoming migraine that’s probably been building for hours.”

She squeezed his arm then, an action that only translated to slightly more pressure through the gauntlet. “I will never doubt you or call into question what you can or cannot do with regards to your biotics and your implant. You know your limits, I _know_ that. But when you’re hurting, as you are now,” she faltered then, searching for the right words, “I won’t push you just because I know you can do it. Whether you accept it or not, you have that from me.”

The silence that fell over them was heavy and thick, and Olivia bit her lip as she looked at him, waiting for a reply. How to answer though… he wasn’t sure he _could_. Not with words. Her speech had wiped the irritation completely out of him and some deep part of him knew she’d just won his unconditional trust.

So, without knowing what to say and deciding that actions speak louder than words, Kaidan unfolded his arms and pulled her into a hug.


End file.
